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That's a very clear description. I think I understand your situation more now. I'd forgot what stuff like this felt like, it's been a long time, it was in my teens... For me it was great at first, doing things like a maniac and sleeping 3-5 hours. Then you notice maybe you've burned up a bit and things get hard, really hard. Maybe like you I felt like I was damaged somehow when I'd spent that energy. I felt like I couldn't even walk anymore without conscious effort but that passed. I learned to talk to people again through self-help books(there was no internet where I could ask for help) and forcing myself. I was at a job I hated, I ignored how shitty it was for a while and got used to it. Eventually things got better on the job situation, education, lovelife, friends etc. I think you'll do good just to persevere despite the difficulties.

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Excuse me for the sidetracking. I didn't want to attack him either. I know there are many paths that really do work. My question is do I want to get where it leads? With Castaneda I don't know because my experience in it is limited. Some people would argue that all spiritual paths lead up the same mountain but I'm not that convinced. I don't like relying on second hand sources and since we started on this sidepath maybe I'll read the books myself and see what they contain. Would Teachings of Don Juan be the place to start?

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There is also "western acupuncture" that doesn't use the traditional points. Avoid that one like the plague!

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In case there is a misunderstanding I'm not dismissing Castaneda. To explain, there's no doubt in me that you can make techniques work that are in the books(I've done the "hands" for awaking in dream). Back when I read JTI I was reminded about things I'd learnt or read from Mexican tradition as well as western esoterics. Many things felt authentic but like I said I was into other things back then that I was trying not to mix practices with each other. The controversies are a different thing. Who knows what happened in there? It's possible my friend freaked out from hearing about these things and eventually got turned off to the whole thing.

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Can you give us a short teaser on the first practices? edit: fixed typo

I did read Journey to Ixtlan once on a train trip in late 90s. I took it as light reading from my parent's bookshelf when I was visiting them. The controversy seems pretty crazy. After I read Ixtlan I was warned by a friend who was into Castaneda that the later books were less reliable and something maybe had went seriously wrong for Castaneda at one point. I was into other things then so I avoided the whole deal. I'm experimenting with some speed variation now that it's been brought up. I think atleast one guy thought I was crazy when I moved in slower than many grannies when he went past me.

Yeah that's funny. Yes. I did not take the time to read it either, merely skimmed some interesting parts. It's certainly not alarmist but shows without doubt that there are indeed effects on the pineal gland. There are some new studies being done like this Harvard University study finding a correlation on fluoridation and IQ... http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/07/24/idUS127920+24-Jul-2012+PRN20120724 Makes sense to me to avoid substances that might be harmful if you can. Luckily artificial fluoridation in my country was stopped in 1992 already so it's not much of an issue here. No one's campaigning for it either since according to the UN our drinking water is cleanest in the world.

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Wonder if the singles here are taking notes? Hehehe.

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I usually walk very fast but lately I've found that I really like moving at a slow pace. Breath is naturally deep and posture starts correcting itself on it's own when I find it. Just my experience, don't know much about Castaneda.

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Great just got a tip about a local teacher that I'm going to check out soon. Low price training in the park, taiji with tuishou.

Oh yes. "Don't cry for the dead" was a piece of old folkwisdom here... well forgotten now.

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Cool, looks like something more interesting to watch with family or friends than usual.

Yeah I thought WTF when I saw our posts come up at the same time. Great stuff...