silent thunder

and since yesterday at work was... unpleasant... I share this one again, in hopes that writing it and not just thinking it will help me embody it today. "Remain silent, or say something better than silence." Pythagorus

That reminds me of one of my favorite quotes by JRR Tolkien "Not all those who wander are lost." It's part of this poem from Lord of the Rings All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king.

One of my life long inner teachers is the Spirit of the Red Tail Hawk. She said to me in my awareness once... "Here's a secret for you... when I fly... i have no feet." When the realization about it settled... it was astounding to me. Vajra. I had been pondering the monkey mind and it's incessant nature and was getting down on myself over its proclivity and abundance in my life. Disparaging it and looking down on it. But she gently reminded me that my mind and thoughts have good reason to be used and a good purpose in some situations. Hawk's feet are a great analogy for my mind and what all this practice and meditation are striving to help manifest. She offered me an insight into the nature of my mind and thoughts and has shaped my process and practice and my approach to my mind. Through my practice, I have been striving to get my mind to behave like a Hawks' feet. When striking for the hunt, or when standing on a branch, I want my feet/mind to be focused, potent and unshakable. Fully present and on the task. Far from wanting to abolish my mind utterly, I seek for it to manifest when appropriate, and to recede when not. When it is time for flight... presence in the now. Mind/feet are folded and all but forgotten... a non-factor. I love haiku, this one kind of sums it up. it's called my mind: like hawk's feet in flight folded, closed and forgotten until the landing

Yup, conversations about cool concepts is one of my favorite things about being. Rain falls as is the nature of rain to fall. In the desert it grows thorns, in the gardens... flowers. Rain falls without distinction on murderers and healers alike. I find this reassuring for some reason. It makes no choices and follows the natural way. It is the nature of humans to die after a time. Sometimes to me, it seems too soon, or too violent, but this is my own baggage. It seems in the universal sense, beyond duality, there is no good and bad. But on the relative scale. Everything seems to easily want to fall into positions of value based on my tendency to judge. This insight came to me spontaneously when unified awareness had settled on my thought pond. I'm not sure why, since I'm still living in relative duality, but it brings me comfort. So I would say yes... the farmers and all of us who die, die naturally, no matter the cause. And if we assign meaning to that good or bad, it's because of our own aquired and maintained personal judgements and energetic matrices. Tao, God, Zoroaster, Awareness, Great Flying Spaghetti Monster, Random Statistical Probability... seems humans are always naming things and I have used many terms over the years when I try and talk about these things. Tao works for me often, but not always. Source is source, and that term is more neutral to me, so I like it right now. But I do find whatever name I try and use, it never seems to encompass and adequately express the experiences I'm trying to convey and share with the words... but I try anyway. This insight hit me when I was considering someone I really despised and it struck me in the midst of my very visceral negative judgement and emotion, that this human and I, come from the same source... the same source of flowers and also dog shit. So if the things I love, flowers and the things I don't like... dog shit, come from the same source... then the difference in my experience of them probably lies in my awareness... in my mind. I love this insight because it reminds me my responsibility in all my interactions, thoughts and judgements. I should ammend this one... I'm rarely serious, not never serious. Seems in the West we have supplanted the words sincere and serious. For me, there are very very few things we need to be serious about... but it is almost never possible for me to be insincere. This is a tricky bit and can easily drop into semantics. But for me, intention is key to the mix and too often, in my upbringing in particular, serousness was a panacea to connote sincerity when often, it turned out, there was no sincerity and the seriousness was a mask to cover ulterior motives. So I rarely am serious... but can't recall the last time i found it ok, or palatable to be insincere. I find levity and laughter to be paramount in my process of late, which is all about being aware... acknowledging conditions of life as they are, doing what I can, or not, as is my nature... and then utterly releasing what transpires to live in the moment as fully as I am able. Yup. Can't believe everything I think... just because I thought something and perhaps even felt strongly about it, doesn't make it real, true, or important. This insight is astounding to me. Because for many years I thought that my perception of the universe was truth. That I saw and heard and took in reality with my senses accurately. I no longer can make that claim. Most of my thoughts seem to be emotional reactions and are utter fantasy. Some thoughts are important... at least to me. Wasn't it Buddha who said... "be careful what you let yourself think... your thoughts become your reality. I was raised fundamentalist, evangelical christian. Extreme judgement. Extreme guilt and shame over very natural things. It was abusive and harmful to me. So after my apostacy. I have come to re-evaluate regularly the thoughts that settle on my thought pond. I find, the vast majority of them have little to no bearing on reality and thus no longer live long in my awareness due to this insight lighting my awareness. I had heard of wu wei but never really investigated or understood it before coming to the Bums years ago. Now I realize that throughout my life, this concept is paramount in my life and is a cornerstone and foundation of my process over the last few years. It is a blissful release and at the same time, an inroad into deeply saturating my being and awareness in the present. As for not glorifying busy. I find the lost art of doing nothing has been woefully overlooked in our Western materialist and consumer based lifestyle. I find it a great and worthy pursuit, in fact, absolutely essential to me, to just allow myself time every day to simply do... nothing. Just breath and be. Empty, simple and me. I can't say for certain what I am. It's far easier to talk with some certainty about what I am not. I don't claim to be a Taoist or any ist, although I do seem to express Taoist tendencies. I will say that I have great gratitude and affinity for many Taoist teachings that resonate as strongly with me as some teachings of the Druids of the Emerald Isles and the Lakota People of my home. Many of the insights and some of the things I do believe, seem to be best stated by Taoist writers, so there is a lot that reflects my own inner state now, even though they were written down and shared many centuries ago. I find great comfort in that as well. Thanks for asking. It is always refreshing to re-evaluate what I hold to be concrete. I appreciate the impetus to reflect on my assumptions. Cheers Mate!

And it's really appreciated... the time and insight shared in those threads. I'm working my way through them slowly myself. Read, sift, let settle, revisit. etc. I had never read Chaung Tzu before coming here. What a treasure!

The only Trolling I'm into these days is with my son and some dice. I'm teaching him to play Dungeons and Dragons... and the Palladium system, which I've always found to be more open and flexible to the story and not so inhibited by endless tables and rules. also, these are welcome in our home...

No worries mate... and much love!

Magic picture show. enticing... seems it's alive. light and shadows play.

I'm ignorant, no doubt. But this conversation has been fascinating and I sometimes don't let my ignorance stop me from blabbing... so, this is what I'm prompted to add to this intriguing conversation about something way over my head and out of my field of prior study.

Waiting to rise up. As above, also below. As within, without.

In Picture one I see folks hoping and opening themselves in the hopes of receiving something. Picture two seems almost staged, like some moments of my time in acting classes, in group improvisation. Though my current experience tells me it may be folks engaging in wu wei qi gong in a public park. Pictures 3-6 look like evangelical christian rallies to me... with 3 being the preacher. Those seating arrangments and hand postures are nigh on exact replicas of hundreds of my early life experiences in the church. I'm curious as to the sources...

That's what they claim... I can't prove it, I see 37.

pass the port old boy. and then a bit to starboard. wait... which way is right?

Don't think... feeeeeel. It's like a finger pointing to the moon. Don't look at the finger, or you miss all the heavenly glory. ~Master Bruce Lee

Your comments remind me of Jamie Foxx. When he was auditioning to play the role of Ray Charles, the Producers wanted him, but he needed to meet Ray and get his approval. So Jamie met with Ray and they hung out and then he wanted to hear Jamie play. So Jamie laid out his 'best' and Ray stopped him. (paraphrase) "no no no no... you can't just play the notes... let go man... feeeeel it. It doesn't matter if you get every note right... but if you don't feel every note, it won't matter." So Jamie cut loose and Ray smiled that smile and said "Yea Baby! You GOT IT!" and off Jamie went to an oscar worthy performance.

true... but even my excesses always led to balance eventually in my life. When I work incessantly... too much, out of balance for instance. Eventually my body shuts down, I get sick and I lay in bed for a few days resting and balance is restored. Tai Chi, the constant interplay and flow has its own seeming failsafe worked into it. Balance will be restored no matter what, but our experience of it, may involve much suffering if we resist, or refuse to recognize the markers, or are incapable of being aware of the symptoms. I find it much of my pursuit in Taoist cultivation and any of the other meditations and spiritual pursuits I have engaged in, were mainly getting me to become sensitive enough to be aware of the signals of imbalance.

and it's absolutely, radiantly awesome! I find myself jealous of the fish and bees who can see the world in ultraviolet... what I wonder obsessively at times... are their rainbows like? ah well... I love the way the rainbows reflect in my eyes.

Thanks Cedar Tree that was a timely message that really resonated for me. my dream life has had enormous revelatory power in my process. I often these days walk about anticipating that I will spontaneously awaken in the 'real' world in the same manner I become lucid in my dream world, nightly.

Much Love Mate!

Well said mate. Like was just posted in the great quotes thread, this very potent quote seems apropo. "if you really want it, you'll find a way, if not, you'll settle for an excuse." I was drawn to Master Zhou and to practice what he taught me diligently because I was crippled and absolutely had to find a way to be able to walk again normally. To be able to run and jump and play with my son, who was five at the time. Two surgeries saved my left foot from having to be amputated, but the trauma from the reconstructed the bone and the surrounding soft tissues left me hobbling with a cane on good days, and stuck in a chair on the not good days. I lived in pain for years before the procedures and for years afterwards. One healing session with Master Zhou had me able to start practicing daily with discomfort, but stable enough to really engage in the process. Daily practice, even for a short time each day at the same time, gathered inertia to the very subtle energetic matrix of the practice. Within months, I was walking normally again. Another few months and I noticed not just my ankle had healed, but all of my old nagging injuries from a lifetime of hard martial arts, rock climbing and construction work had vanished. Several more months and my desire for most social media was intolerable and I dropped broadcast tv and radio from my home life. My diet naturally changed, my blood sugar, cholesterol and blood pressure all stabilized. My emotions became more stable and now, six years later, approaching 50. I work 60+ hour weeks in construction with no pain, an even disposition and much humor and joy. I wake up with no discomfort in the morning. In the core of my being I absolutely had to find a way to heal and I knew it was possible, even though the dozens of doctors I went to for the years leading up to my surgeries all told me it was pointless. When my cousin mentioned Master Zhou was in California teaching Qi Gong and offering healings, it clicked in my core and I knew in that moment, I had found my way. That simple practice and one 45 minute transmission and healing session, opened a door within me to manifest healing in my own life. As Zhou told me... "You are not my patient. I don't have patients. I have students. I'm not healing you. I'm teaching you so you may manifest natural healing." Tears of gratitude even now as I consider what his wisdom and dedicated practice allowed me to experience through him. *deep bow* I sense great passion and desire from the Mo Pai group. But what I hear from them, is excuses. About why they can't listen to anyone. Why they can't trust anyone. Why everyone else is following some bullshit path of uselessness. But the only one in your way is you. And that's fine. It affects those of us with experience and a path, not a whit. Because we are living our practice. It is not just a practice, it is our very lifestyle. It's resonant in my bones and flesh in every action of my day now. It's shifted my thinking, my emotional triggers and respones and is reflected in the resonance of my relationships and my outlook on all of life. My entire life is transformed... again. And this is not the last transformation. Just another shift in the process. The ever fluid, flowing process of my life and my path. I'm reminded of the great quote by Calvin Coolidge 30th president of the US. "Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent." There was nothing wrong with my path when I couldn't walk, on the grand scale. But for me personally, on the relative scale it was torture and intolerably unacceptable. I simply had to manifest a way to be able to play with my son. So no excuse would stop me. And it didn't. Take a moment to connect with your breath. Release all the bullshit. Release every thought you have ever assumed to be true if you can and simply allow a few moments of emptiness to connect to your breath and your core. It's never separate from you. The one seeming impossible thing to me is for me, or any of us, to ever be separated from Source/Tao by even a hair's width for one moment... ever. This is why I now find it true that Taoist pursuits are not about adding stuff to my tool box, they're about losing things. Stripping away all the assumptions and energetic matrices built up by non real thought matrices over time. Thoughts of others that I was compelled to agree to, thoughts that come from my own illusions. Some of them from my very perceptual experiences, born of believing thoughts that aren't real, true or even important. It's not about knowing the path. I don't know my path. I am the path. I am the way. So try it... empty the self, be the breath and in that core. What is authentic cannot fall away... so release everything and be open to what remains and in my case, that which remains is unfailingly my core essence. This led me to Masters Zhou, Wang Li Ping. My wife of 28 years. My life's passions and my own innate natural power. And no argument or statement from anyone else can shake it, because I know their words are just reflections of their thoughts and this next point has been crystallized for me as vajra. A flash of insight that is unignorable which illuminates a truth as hard as diamond. Thoughts aren't real. They're just thoughts. We have 90,000 a day. Nothing about them is real, true or even important. I don't know my path. But I walk it. I am it. Simple being. most of my practice now has fallen away from forms, but has expanded into every step and moment of my life. Master Zhou shared this with me. Kind Heart Quiet Heart Sincere Heart. With these, all of life becomes practice. Without them, we're just waving our hands in the air. What do you Love? I guarantee your path is linked to that. and it's never even a hair's width away from you... ever.

I thought so at first, but according to the creators of the test, the colors are not evenly divided. It's a cheat prevention I assume, so when using the test for actual scientific results they can throw out answers greater than 39 so this doesn't throw off the data, due to people's desire to 'score better' by deducing how many colors are present that they think they should be able to see, when they can't actually perceive them, (not sure why anyone would try and cheat on this anyway, since it only indicates the number of receptors in your eyes and thus has no bearing on the outcome and won't change vision. It's just an interesting way to uncover a bit more about one's self and how our perception works). Those who made the diagram claim they made it with 39 distinct hues.

It hit me very simply one day. So simply, that the realization simply stripped away a lot of the bull shit I carry around and create for myself moment by moment, decade by decade in my mind. Thoughts aren't real. They're not inherently real, true, or even important. I no longer believe everything I think.

Fascinating stuff. Thanks to all contributing. Aside from Niwan and the nine palaces of the head... has anyone here had any experiences with the 'back mirror'?

I found it interesting that my innate dislike of yellow is not unusual among tetrachromes. It always seems harsh to me. Sunlight is a real bugger for me out here in Southern California lol. On some of these tests, I have noticed slippery areas in the orange hues for me. I counted 37. For the record, there are 39 colors in that diagram... according to those who produced the image.