silent thunder

The resonant pattern that I refer to as my body... a very slow, dense vibration that holds a seeming pattern for a space of time that is recognizable to my friends and family as my body... in recent years, seems not so much like a vessel that my personality and mind/spirit inhabits... but rather my body is more akin to a whirlpool that forms clearly in a river. Energy flows throughout all of the river and the whirlpool. Yet to my senses, there is a recognizable pattern and a seemingly clear form to the whirlpool for as long as the energy continues to flow in this manner. Yet it's water all the way up and down the scale and it's always flowing in and out with the rest of the river. Any more, my body seems but a pattern of vibration that condenses noticeably within the field of awareness. Field of awareness is the river. My body is a form that manifests within this flow. Recognizable for a time, to my human tuned senses. Whirlpools may be clearly seen, yet they are still only patterns within the river.

Watching this, I turned and started eyeing my singing bowl. Probably should wait for the family to wake up first though...

all is vibration up and down infinitely all is resonance

What a wonderful conversation to start my morning with... gratitude bums... gratitude.

there are many bulbs... but only one light?

The older I get... the greyer I seem to be.

and oysters... man, to me... eating those things takes some serious hunger and courage.

My response would likely be a silent one. Not to invest any more energy in that or them at all. Release it. A few years ago, I'd likely have tried to use words backed up by the power of my conviction to plant seeds in their awareness... thinking that (because I considered that I had my shit together enough to permit me to govern others...) perhaps in time my insightful words would grow into a realization for them and bring merit, but any more? pfft... I realized from my little perspective and very minor awareness... I am not fit to be the world police and the thought surgeon of others and tell them where their path should go? I'm a mess. I just need to work on myself. But for most of my life, I thought that a few well chosen words (from my lofty wisdom) that focused on what I thought the crux of the issue was would solve the issue or set things right... life has shown me very plainly and repeatedly, that my assumptions that I know what's best for others, or any who'd follow that line is just a story I tell myself... I don't know how that should all play out. So now, until I'm able to release something like this and get back to simply being me, I'd focus on where and how the energy stirred up in the exchange was settling and then breathe into it with awareness. And let awareness distill the energies naturally. People do and say things every day, sometimes in my own house that I don't agree with... I no longer consider myself fit to fix the world, or other people's paths... I'm just not a qualified observer. I'll be very grateful to make just a bit of progress on my own broken self. But that's me. this haiku mantra or some variation plays out in my head a lot these last few years it's brought me much peace and clarity muddiest waters left undisturbed by my force rest in clarity

whoa... well, there's that. It's amazing, the hungrier one gets... how feasible certain things seem to become isn't it?

Curious where others are on this... For years mine were not locked... 'just walk in.' Though, if you don't knock, or announce... be prepared to potentially see some odd shit. Now I'm in the conditional crowd. It's locked under certain circumstances.

while i inevitably experience discomfort and even pain... that does not mean I am suffering.

*deep bow* i am not worthy.... dear god that was funny... thank you!

Most warriors I know long for peace, not conflict, unless they're psychotic. That crazy old notion of 'fighting for peace'... so like the other adage.. "fucking for virginity." I guess there's peace of a sort in a graveyard, but not my kind of peace. Yet there seems some prudence in the philosophy of "I'd rather be a warrior in a garden, than a gardener in a war." Life abounds with situations that don't fall neatly into categories of the logical 'oh so marginally helpful' left brain way of thinking.

well... that's one way to look at it I guess...

game. set. match! well played mate!

I long for a feature that would allow me to ignore topics as a whole, so that they would no longer appear in the content feed.

I absolutely believe it's possible. I've gone decades with naught but well chosen words in some very tense situations. My wife and I have been watching The Hobbit films again. And as Thorin lay dying and he seeks the forgiveness of Bilbo, he has a particularly potent line... "I would part from you as friends Bilbo... Go back to your shire and your books. Plant your trees and watch them grow. The world would be a merrier place, if more folk were like you and valued home over gold."

violence is abhorrent to me and represents a failure... there is no glory in violence and heroes to me are those who can avoid violence, harm and war. but sometimes it is required. Seems no way around that in a life filled with bodies and tyrants and innocents. Verse 31 puts it plainly and I quite agree with the sentiment. 31 Weapons; tools of pain, used for violence and fear, decent men abhor. Yet in direst need and if compelled will use them, with utmost restraint. Peace, highest value. When the peace has been shattered who can be content? Glory in fighting? Those who delight in killing do not know true self. Your foes not demons. Simple beings like yourself. Sage desires no harm. No victory dance. victory by force, no joy how rejoice in this? Sage battles gravely with sorrow, and compassion like tending a grave.

I took water for granted, growing up in the saturated forests of Minnesoata and Canada. Then I came to the desert and now... I always danced in the rain but now, I sing too.

two coaches. two little league teams. one championship game. ***************************** Coach Blue: It's a game. Games should be fun. That's the point of playing. If we are not enjoying ourselves why bother playing at all? So we play to enjoy ourselves, the score is irrelevant. We practice in order to learn about teamwork and that effort leads to improvement. I love these kids and so I challenge them some... I want them to learn that when you invest your effort into something, you will see rewards from that. Winning and losing is not the point with me, everyone plays in the game, regardless of the score, or their ability. What matters is having fun and working well together, if we do this, then we honor the game and we win, no matter the score. Why obsess over winning and losing and the score? It's just a game, there is always another game. To focus on winning takes away from the game. We should have fun. Coach Orange: It's a game. The point of a game is to win it, otherwise why play the game? Why keep score at all and not just go do something else? We play to win the game, that's the point. We practice to get better as a team, to improve. I love these kids and I challenge them. I want them to learn that effort and discipline will make you the best you can be, that if you put in the effort to be your best, you will improve and help the team win. What matters is that we always do our best and work well as a team in order to win. By doing our best we honor the game... so our best players play in the game so the whole team has the best chance of success. I mean why would anyone play if not to win? It takes away from the game. play to win? play for fun? which coach is right? which team wins?

it's thoroughly humbling to be able to converse freely with such minds and hearts as come to share here. really this place is incredible.

I derive deep comfort from this simple awareness. water is not water... and yet it is water.