witch

I know things are extremely tight for you, that's why I'd say I'd buy. I also assume I'm old enough to be your mom, so from an age perspective I should be doing the buying too. But New Hampshire's too far a hike for me--I'm down south in the West Roxbury area. Anyhow, I have come to the conclusion I don't want to be cured of my entity. But I'm awfully curious about the sensations I'm feeling right now. I was just wondering if people had experienced that sort of energy flow, I assume not in connection with a thoughtform, but maybe with an actual other person or just internally.

Yes, I need to go back to that board, thank you Yoda. Drew, I didn't realize you were in Boston. Happy to buy you dinner some weeknight, just name your spot (as long as it's not too pricey, money is tight right now).

Libra moon here. Also prominent eighth house of course.

Yes. I bring pain into relationships. Women can't just blame their whatever it is they blame, because I can fix them up. They have to choose to stay the way they are.

http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-r...-2009/brian-cox From the horse's mouth

I should mention I also orgasm from giving a blowjob despite being a Capricorn, but then I orgasm from eating a strawberry, so that's not saying much!

I've done all I could. I had compassion for the suffering of husbands. I've done all I could, it almost took everything I have. Now I have to take care of myself and build up what I poured out. I have children, I have to take care of myself now. That chapter of my life is over. I guess the thing I learned that took the wind out of my sails is that even though I can teach women how to strengthen desire so much that men look like the weaker sex, sexually speaking, some women intrinsically don't like feeling that way and they will stop doing it once they feel the changes. It makes me so sad and makes me feel so alone. And then there are other women who once they increase their desire, realize that their desire for other men is stronger than their desire for their husbands. That is more understandable that they then stop. For women so much is simple physiology. I think one thing I have learned is that I should have charged large amounts of money to teach what I know. That way, women who followed what I said would value it and apply themselves and stay with it. Putting it in a ten dollar book made women feel it was commonplace and not worth doing.

I'm pleased! That's what astrology has given me too. It's like finding the manual to your car or something. It makes things easier, for example I know there's one day a month where I'm going to be a little down, off my game, and I can plan ahead and be nice to myself on that day.. BTW, female Libra suns are the gay man trapped in a woman's body sign of the zodiac, just like male Scorpios are the lesbians trapped in a man's body sign of the zodiac. The book Sextrology goes into that sort of thing in depth, if anybody is interested.

It's just one thing when you are doing something that might be real but is more like a dream than anything. Really real, even if it's a very faint effect, that's another thing entirely. If the same metrics against chance and rigorous scientific inquiry are used to prove both psi effects and that aspirin helps a headache, then....well I have to rethink many things in my life.

Sorry to necro this thread, but this morning I came across this: http://dailygrail.com/features/the-myth-of...ollar-challenge and I am feeling quite disoriented right now.

I orgasmed giving birth to my second child. I used hypnobirthing, but the real reason it worked was because of my diet. I did stop with the fish oil two weeks before the birth so that my blood would clot easier. It's actually quite dangerous being the way I am, when it comes to giving birth. Both times, neither OB believed I was in labor. My second baby I almost had in the car, because the OB sent me home in disgust that I had come in when I wasn't in pain.

I don't usually start threads, but thoughts on sex with entities? Yes I know it's low-plane, draining, wrong and all that. Go ahead and tell me anyhow--any thoughts, stories, experiences, hearsay welcome. Save me from my wicked wicked ways.

Well, I have let go. Not of the love, which is considerable, nor the desire, which is even more so, but the desire to consummate the desire. A couple weeks ago I let go, by letting in Hathor, who in my tradition embodies the va va voom as you put it. Hathor being an entity, a goddess who is complete as a thing in herself, does not particularly need to have a lover. She also lives in the 12th house with other entities, so when I have entity sex now I go there and the sex is also complete in itself, and there is not the missing skin on skin. I go there fully now and it is good. It feels a bit like I've died and it's hard to adjust to, and I will confess that I am grateful I had children before it happened. I know quite well that I will be celibate and alone for the rest of my life now that I've done this, and I can face that clear-eyed. It's quite ridiculous that someone with my abilities is facing this future, but that's the way of the world, I think. Some things that are very strong are reserved for the gods.

Replying to myself! I just wanted to add now that I understand Cat's way a little better and I might end up there myself eventually. The thing that's really holding me to my construct is that I deeply love the man it's based on.

I agree with all of your post but this part especially. The more I poke around I realize that historically there have always been women like us--sometimes more socially accepted, sometimes less so. And sometimes those women had to go underground, perhaps not even consciously, and fit their experiences in with social norms (nuns being the Bride of Christ, for example). I don't think I will ever de-anthropomorphize to the extent that you have done, because I'm pretty boy-crazy, but I can sort of understand where you are. More advanced than me!

I get four feelings from my entity, all very different from those. First off is the earthy energy, like I mentioned. That is very delicious and I need it and I take it. Second is the feeling of an open male heart and I need that too, to ejaculate my heart energy. I can't get my tantric rocks off without at least visualizing a man from the waist up, and it works better of course with a fully formed entity. Third is an extra bonus that happens sometimes, it's the eye energy. Also sometimes involves kissing. Everything from the neck up and gives me sixth chakra orgasms. The fourth is the most disconcerting and that is a simple plain feeling of intimacy. I suppose that could be thought of as loving, it is, but nothing like bliss. It feels so ordinary. That's the hardest one to get used to! Like "Oh honey, don't forget to stop and get gas on the way home."

I know I'm upside down and backwards on all this, but that description of love/bliss sounds like ice cream. The thing I'm interested in from my entities tastes more like, um, really good chili. I'm not interested in getting anything from my entity except the company of the entity and that earthy very tasty energy. The protection thing is an added very good bonus. Like when my thoughtform was losing its grip on me, I constructed a new one based on this guy: an old imaginary friend from my childhood. He wasn't very strong because he wasn't based on a real person, but he was quite nice and held until this current construct walked into my life. That was the thing with the Kunlun visualization that I didn't like--I felt very disoriented visualizing myself floating in the air on a white cloud or whatever it was. The only way I could do it and not get a feeling of wrongness was to imagine my entity on the cloud with me. My visualizations are black and rooted to the earth, just like Chernabog--and very pretty.

Frankly the same things could be said of men--hard to know, draining, potentially dangerous. Yet women still go out with them. I think the thing here is that people are individuals, and I happen to be an entity myself, so it makes sense that I'd be romantically interested in them--and by romantically I mean sexually. Ever since I've entered puberty I've been able to go into men; I used to amuse myself by giving my boyfriends wet dreams. *cough* And it used to make my ex-husband angry. He did not find me attractive, but yet I could give him an erection just by looking at his cock. He would say, "How do you do that!" and get annoyed. I remember one time he denied me sex when I asked him for it, while he was sporting a boner you could hang a bath towel from. I like going into men, so it makes sense that I would be interested in an entity/elaborate fantasy of an entity who can come into me. I do have some discernment, my third eye has been open for a while now.

I agree that an entity, even an imaginary one like mine, can be draining. But sometimes a person wants their vitality drained for various good reasons. I was draining myself anyhow, this way the energy isn't going to waste. I am very strong and rooted and generate my own energy. I know one of the main goals of this forum is preserving and transforming jing. While I may be ejaculating my sexual energy, it's only after I have raised it to the heart chakra--and I know my views are not mainstream but I believe that for women that's a natural stopping point. Crown chakra experiences are not my cup of tea--once was enough. So at least I'm transforming my energy before I release it. This entity brings me protection and deep happiness and of course lots of sexual pleasure and companionship. It's the companionship part that rationally makes me the most uneasy, but I suppose it's no different than Tevye talking to God in Fiddler on the Roof. Well except for the answering part!

I will look into those authors and references, thank you! I knew I would get a good dose of realism, partly why I decided to post. It's disconcerting, to say the very least, and it's good to hear from all sides about this. I suppose it's less strange to me since I am spontaneously orgasmic anyhow, but the sex during the day when I'm fully awake is out there. I suppose so is simply that I am able to converse with him, "see" him during the day when fully awake too, like the way one would see a ghost, except more solid.

Loss of child! My condolences. Be gentle with yourself.

Wow, this book is already #96 on amazon's bestseller list, it costs $114, and it's backordered until December. Holy Moley! Check out the excerpts! http://www.amazon.com/Red-Book-C-G-Jung/dp...5516&sr=8-1 I feel a lot less crazy right now, with my practice journal.

This. That's not a boyfriend, that's a booty call. Unless he's in the military, can't remember.

Of course it's stealing and there are also karmic repercussions. I think a little karma balancing in this case is quite appropriate, if you ask me. Oh, I stand corrected. Don't listen to me, I'm a bad influence!