blue eyed snake

Looking back to my childhood, so glad we were raised without any religion. Had to learn to think for myself, what is ethical and what is not and why do you think so. When you really think so will you stand up for your idea of ethics? I was raised with a comparatively low amount of conditioning in that regard, what a gift.

well... although I regard myself as nothing, just BES. There's always the danger of a person setting themselves up as pipsqueak guru's, long before the original realization has come to fruition. The term luminous blob comes to mind. Bindi is walking her path as she deems fit and she's doing that with outstanding resilience. plus, remembering some experiences in my personal past: the first realisation of the fact that 'me' is just a layers of layers of conditioning plus some other thingies... happened together with strong energetic experiences, it pretty much consumed me. When Bindi feels her path is for her the best way, it just is. totally unimportant where she will reach some 'goal' next week or next life as long as she feels the way she has to tread.

~ Sri Aurobindo (1932) Nothing to add to that, waiting some years to get the gist from the current situation is the way I try to go.

an apt comparison

you'd better ask @dwai

all according to the book eh

adding to that, that's probably were I picked up some things as a youngster

somehow this reminds me of Stranger in a strange land from Heinlein

it hurts so much to see how humans pillage and burn our mother earth

hm, I say this because I've always been having the awareness of having something ' bigger' operating through me. As a very small child I simply thought of it as ' the light'. that light became stronger when compassion awoke in the toddlers heart. this picture, found on the internet, conveys what I mean. That kid could have been me .

so many words, so many concepts to me (this part of the total-being) it feels like the individual can be aware of the larger consciousness operating through him/her. whether you class that as experience... that becomes hairsplitting to me.

just to clarify. Do you mean the word emptiness as you use it is meant to describe that state were the daily self is folded up real small?

yes, that is about how I would phrase it in my own language, the rest of your post is very helpful for me, thanks.

yes, well that's exactly what happened to me. After dissolving a f*#*#*g big block of about the nastiest shit in this life the tower crumbled, the perspective changed and awareness was. I never even knew this was possible and did actively not want to have to do anything with spirituality.... If I had not experienced it directly, it would have meant so much hogwash to me. Non clinging mind, what a beautiful way to describe it. Those things feel like gifts to me. Not sure I understand what you say here, english is not my native language and my cognitive facilities have deteriorated due to illness. Used to be a smart cookie, now I struggle to think clearly. This reading and posting takes all the cognitive energy of this day. as I experience it, compassion has somehow deepened, on the other hand I am much better at keeping boundaries, otherwise I would drown. I do not read your ideas as a moral stance, I read it as Bindi and how she experiences and develops, that's all good, she walks the path as it is laid out before her. indifference or neutrality is not what resonates with me, although...those first weeks were like that

Space as a concept is very interesting to me and it’s unique characteristics make it an ideal metaphor for the base of all. Mother is also a wonderful metaphor especially when taken with child - mother space and child awareness, their union giving rise to the warmth of enlightened qualities like the Four Immeasurables. Space as a meditative experience is even more profound and is a crucial element in the practices and applications. It is heavily emphasized in Bön. space and time are not anything like how they are presented to the daily living, no idea how/what they are. and I miss the concept of compassion in this thread, is that what you touch on with the mother-child thing?

thank you Luke, that's wise words that bring us down to earth. Not being able to do formal practice this is what happens here too, when I would be able to do formal practice, this would be the way to go too. You cannot separate the daily life from the formal practice, life is practice.

that's useful, thanks to your teacher. I always think your teacher and mine are brothers in spirit. I find when I reread the little I read it holds layers I did not see before. Or passages that I could not get my head around have become obvious. is that what you mean?

yes

yup, those practices are recognizable much. your last sentences, that's what I meant by the daily self folding up smaller.

When i used that expression, I was referring to my personal experience as a practitioner. As the sense of self that is very busy thinking, elaborating, coloring and commenting on my experience slowly releases and rests (getting smaller as blue eyed snake suggests), my experience of whatever is present in that moment, in the senses, in the body, and mind becomes more clear, more immediate, more naked and fresh. I'm trying not to define this so much in conceptual terms but rather staying with the experience of practice. yes Steve, and that is how I understood it, sort of instant recognition. as I have never talked about the weird things that happened the daily self made up its own language to describe things. Words just do not convey what you talk about when the other ( see how funny this gets) has nothing to relate it too. The word then gets hung up to a totally different concept and conversations get out of hand.

you're not getting much answers uh... really I do not feel like I've reached any gnosis, I am just a slithering snake, quietly resting in the bushes. but yes, things changed, several weeks after I was very disbalanced, my whole worldview had toppled over. So much that any psychologist would have popped me some pills as from the outside that may have looked like psychosis. In the long run I've become less reactive. Before the snake was quick to bite and bite hard, now less so. when I find myself in high emotions I tend turn inwards afterwards and look to the reason that little self is inflamed. But as I haven't been able to do any formal practice for many years now, things have watered down. sensitivity grew enormously and there have been some changes to the physical body as well. no idea whether there are patterns, might be. Teacher warned us away from analyzing or 'comparing notes'. At the time that was a tall order, now it feels like very obvious. It seems to me that comparing notes can all too easily lead to distorted notions and self-aggrandizing.

well, that places the practice as I was taught clearly in the nondual tradition. The realisation that there is a sort of all encompassing consciousness came earlier though. I remember clearly when I came out of that meditation totally shocked, like WTF...those newagey people with their talk about this were right after all... I've never looked into theoretic ' explanations' and philosophies though, so this is all very interesting. On the other hand, it smacks of err... making a story out of things you've experienced. and that experiencing is one of the things I stumble on. years ago I was out for a weekend ( or week, do not remember) of training, after a morning filled with energy exercise we laid down in the dojo for a lying down meditation. I had looked forward to this as meditation tended to be much deeper done like this. Then the guy beside me started to snore, he always had this trouble falling asleep, so I rolled over a bit and gave him a wifely push and whispered. You will stay awake now. But alas, after a few minutes the sawing of wood restarted, being quite irked and the body telling me there was an urge to pee also I stole out of the dojo, took care of bodily needs and decided to pick up meditating upstairs. Laid down, mentally connected with downstairs and then...bam I was in the beautiful summer air, the deepest blue with nice fat white clouds, or was I? I was that sky but 'I' was not there. The I was folded up real small, so small as to be totally un-interfering. at the same time there was an awareness of the body which was lying down in a stupor, someone was standing beside it. ( later I heard that someone had gone up to check on me) so there was an awareness of being the sky, being into the sky, and something about the body the one typing this remembers, but somehow was not involved

thanks, this cuts through the fog, will reread.

how could anyone be disturbed by the sound of a bluejay?

I get hickups in the notifications under the bell button too. like 3 times the same one in a row, do not mind but it's strange