Pits&Bieces

yeah, suffering isn't exactly the right word. idt I'm putting the cart before the horse as you say it'd just be cool to understand the appeal of the destination before implementing the dhamma.. the 8-fold path makes sense as a path of ever-increasing happiness, except for the end result of complete extinction;how could there possibly be any happiness there? freedom from suffering yes, but extinction of everything else too, sooooo... it just doesn't sound too appealing, yet so many are after it so its likely i'm misunderstanding something here. could anyone explain?

nibbana praised as the highest happiness because you are free from suffering. that's great! but its also complete cessation of the body mind. i see that going through jhanas and cultivating compassion and wisdom as very worthwhile, but why go all the way? isn't it worth suffering a bit to have your happiness? why do buddhist say that extinction is preferable?

I've gone through something similar man. Something you've gotta remember is that as bleak as life looks now, there seem to be others out there that have found a life worth living on the spiritual path and in life in general. Thinking of these beings may help light the fire in you to start up your practice again and find a teacher. If these existential issues really bother the hell out of you and make it so youre unable to function I'd say that its an absolute necessity to practice daily. Pick something and stick to it. Wordly life does seem pretty meaningless without a spiritual practice at its core. I would simply be unable to function unless I felt like I was addressing these issues. But I don't address them by thinking about them anymore. The primary series of astanga yoga has been very grounding for me and its 8-limbed path is something that very much resonates with me. I highly recommend it. I know my practice addresses this existential anxiety. Practice, practice, practice. What else is there to do? I'm not too far in but it seems quite worthwhile, even in the short-term. Hope this helps man. <3

Couldn't find anything with a basic search and idt I can search your posts could you point me in the right direction?

In astanga yoga, asana practice is traditionally done 6 days a week, skipping all "moon days". This refers only to full moons and new moons. They're supposed to have some effect on your energies, and I don't doubt it. The full moon is likened to the end of an inhalation and the new moon to the end of an exhalation - the former you're full of energy and can be unbalanced/emotional and the latter more grounded. In both cases, it is recommended to skip practice on these days or keep it very light. I'm sure we've all heard stuff about how full moons affect people. I know there's no "scientific" studies or whatever to prove any effects but this doesn't mean there aren't any. I think it's a common misconception people have that the full moon is closer to the earth than normal, when this is not the case. Apogee and perigee refer to the max/min distances from moon to earth. These are the points where I'd assume would be the most effect on people but what's always talked about is full/new moons. Does anyone understand what's goin on here? Is this a common practice in other traditions?

What a relief.

Thanks Nikolai. Excellent point. I'm not entirely sure why I'm so preoccupied about the high aspect of it but no i'm not just searching for highs. Still, it's nice to know that some of the things that inspired me to take up the hard work will be there to greet me once more, as like a side-dish ... but high after high hasn't cut it in a long time. Most of the time it seems like the only really worthwhile thing to do - cultivate, that is - yet getting those habits firmly in place hasn't come easily. Any idea how much if any drug use and past 'impurities' /non-ideal changes to the physical body-mind affect one's ability to progress on a real path?

9th, what do you mean - could you elaborate? Steve, you mention a potential to discover a treasure far greater than any artificially induced state. On some levels this is really hard to believe, especially considering some of the things I've experienced on mushrooms and psychedelics in general. (i've given these up long ago, but they've really shown me something else and set an extraordinarily high standard) I have a hard time believing that the euphoria and immense love -as if it was an infinite waterfall gushing through my very being and bursting through all my pores (so much so that it's almost painful)- felt in some of these states is something that could be accessed all the time. If it is, then it's much easier to have a firm resolution although I fear I'm missing the point in my speculations. That's a great analogy about a child who has lost its mother. Something I'll try to keep in mind. I do hope my desires to occasionally indulge in drugs will fade, at least the overly compulsive part of them. I worry that some of this compulsive drug-use has done damage and perhaps made me less receptive to the truth. But perhaps this is irrelevant if I'm sincere. The closest thing I have to a group of spiritually-minded people is my yoga teachers and peers. Not exactly a credible & authentic spiritual master, but something I'll be looking for in time.

Thanks everybody for all the great responses. The general feel I'm getting here is that I should put aside my petty speculations and worries and just start on something basic that I can stick to - and perhaps the rest will resolve itself as I move along. What I ultimately want is to live with more joy and have peace. Now I'm not exactly ready to up and leave to an asram or anything like that. I want to live my life! but I feel very strongly that anything without a spiritual core to it as a means to improve my life will only be superfluous. Currently, I really resonate with the eight limbed yogic path organized by patanjali. I plan on working up to the recommended 6 days a week of asana practice as an addition to my daily meditation and to pay careful attention to the yamas and niyamas as well. My drug use is compulsive when it occurs and often throws me into a brief depression. Usually my meditation and asana falls by the wayside and I feel like I'm making no progress at all. Hopefully as I keep on getting back up these compulsions will dissolve as my commitment to daily cultivation increases and any continued drug use will decrease in its now blatantly compulsive and destructive nature.

So the idea of taking up a spiritual path seems great in many ways to me. Totally makes sense to try to know the inner first before knowing the outer and this reques commitment to daily self-cultivation. Beyond daily self-cultivation, purity seems to be something that is essential to be able to be sensitive to Dao and a staple to a sincere spiritual quest. Food consumption is easy enough to stay pure with for me and I know its for the best to eat well whether i want to follow a path to the end or not. Porn / PMO is something I struggle with a little bit and I know it needs to go for sure. The third thing regarding purity is drug use and that's where I'm really hungup. I feel like I can't commit to a path without being pure in that regard. Right now my drug use isn't at a point i'd like it to be, and I at least want to stop for a while and get back to a place in myself where I can be absorbed in the present and be naturally joyful. I know that daily self--cultivation is a way to be higher like that on my own. BUT - then I think.. what about getting to this point.. and THEN doing coke or G or mushrooms or whatever and having a good time with friends simply getting high. I know that to really get fruits from a spiritual path one must be 100% sincere and authentic with their aspirations so I'm hoping to convince myself that it would be better to cultivate myself daily and strive for purity in all aspects. But would it really be worth it for a potential future, well-balanced 'me' to give up even occasional drug use for recreational purposes? Are the results and peace of mind greater than the euphoria of taking various drugs? I'd hope to hear from people who've been at both ends of this spectrum but welcome everyone's thoughts. Thanks! P.S. one more thing that gives me a little hangup is about what is to be done when the goal is reached. if at enlightenment, there is nobody there to experience the joys of liberation then wouldn't it be beneficial to only go right up the point of liberation and perhaps stop there to enjoy for a while, even though there would still be suffering i mean at least something would be happening at those higher levels of being..

So I've found my way to this forum just lurking for the past year maybe year and a half - and recently, I find my way here more and more as my interest in sincerely taking up a spiritual path. I really love the idea of daily self-cultivation. To know the inner before trying to know the other. And how this basic principle can really bring a great deal of clarity and freedom to one's life. However, almost all paths insist on some level of purity. For me this isn't much of a problem with the food i eat. My body just doesn't tolerate much else. I'm still into porn and I've been trying to quit that for a while. I know it needs to go, it's just taking some time. However the one thing regarding purity - which seems to be the biggest obstacle to my sincerely taking up a spiritual path - is total abstinence from drugs. I have questions on that, and plan on going into details in a later post, but first I just want to say hi and give anyone out there who's listening an idea of what I'll be talking about later on. Good to be here and I hope I may find some guidance.