Taoway

I have had this happen to me too. I read somewhere where a guy was explaining it with a scale saying when hes single he is usually at a 7 of general happiness. Sometimes that goes to a 6 and somethings it reaches a 8 or 9 maybe one day 10. But with a relationship or a girl he would be able to reach the 8 or 9 level of happiness but also faces some 4-5 levels of unhappiness pretty often. And then a very low 2 -3 level of unhappiness when she leaves or cheats or the relationship just falls apart. Relationships with the wrong women seem to make the highs higher and the lows more frequent haha. I really admire what you said with just preparing for a life of solitude which to many may sound depressing but to me sounds like a very admirable and positive thing to prepare for. Because aren't we all going to have to face being physically alone one day? I will do this too. Thank you

Thanks for this. I had this in mind just a week ago but lost track of it. Your last statement is exactly whats going on. Im not following my own script at all. I am falling to what is expected out of people in general.. or what other peoples scripts are. I can relate a lot to what carl jung says about feeling alone. "loneliness does not come from not having people around you, but from being unable to be able to communicate the things that are important to you". I know i wouldn't fall into lonely pits like this if i had a friend or two who i could speak about the deeper things in life with. Hobbies passions creations ideas philosophies etc. So its often hard to explore those things just by myself. Although like a psychedelic experience or death that can only be traveled alone.. I should try to embrace the things i love entirely alone and at ease. My goal is definitely to just become whole hearted and content sitting alone. Always welcoming and easily letting go those who do come and go.

I agree.. there is a an inertia for getting in relationships and marriages. Even for having kids. And I've even noticed that my relationship with a girl started off as genuinely unconditional friendship. But then when the relationship aspects came into play things became unbalanced. I feel I just have to cross a bridge to the side of simple acceptance of being alone for now. And just embrace life as it is with out a partner. Liminal you say relationships can be very great parts of life .. but that makes me cringe because I have not even gotten close to being in a relationship with a girl in some time. So what am I to do? It really isn't that easy for some to get into a partnership where one feels safe. And why get into one where you dont?

I already experienced it. And if a girl has cheated on someone before or has a promiscuous nature I'll stay clear. Because although relationships are a joy. They can also lead to a shorter life if it's with a person who sucks the life out of you and takes advantage of you

In either case. I feel very hopeless about it all. I feel like I am born in the wrong world. Because when I see all these stories of women who just weren't emotionally entertained enough in their marriages so they decide to have an affair. Or many. What the fuck is wrong with women today? That isn't a preference to be promiscuous it's a perversion. It's a reflection of our sick pleasure seeking desire ridden society. It fuckin scares me. Statistically men are happier in marriages too. Men are just trying to live a simple life and settle down. Yet women seem to be so influenced by shitty media and entertainment that they feel they need more spice in their lives. Cus they "deserve it". And often these women have kids and are putting their sexual gratification above raising their kids... this seems so common! They shouldn't be having kids! Only people who want to actually spend their time raising kids who have them. Animals don't do this shit.. When a female animal has kids. She pretty much let's go of all instinct of finding a mate and just nurtures her young. Yet I heard a story of a women who left her son playing on the playground to have an affair with some guy in a bathroom... It's so sickening. I don't want to wait around for a girl in this kind of dating pool. I'm sorry for this I guess I'm venting more then anything. It would help if anyone related to this feeling and shared how they deal with it

I'm sorry but sometimes a failing relationship with a girl who is very manipulative can set you back pretty far. And to find someone special can't I just find them through work or something? Like become friends with them first. Or is that unlikely. Is the only way to find a partner to hit on them and ask them out.

Really I'm asking for a discussion on this. It's really a difficult thing to deal with I'm sure many can relate.

Oh wow! I can tell I'm going to read this often Thank you. It's intriguing to read about taiji in depth like this. And a lot of it goes along with what my teacher said and then some !

Very interesting. I can think of some moves in the slow form that do that. I often feel an emotional state that fades away halfway through the form and I can a different more clear perspective come about. Chen has always been a form I wanted to learn. It looks so cool! I moved out of town before I could learn the whole fast step form of yang or any sword stuff. Can you tell me anymore about how to visualize or use the form to fight inward resistance

My taiji teacher only saw it as a martial art. He knew the health benefits but he mainly taught us the martial aspects. Sometimes I wished he knew more about the internal practice of taiji. Yhe more philosophical side of it. But he was still a great teacher. But damn I love that mindset of taiji being used to fight those internal enemies or patterns if that's what you have meant. Makes me want to practice for hours. Do you practice and form?

Ah I remember a band teacher who conducted elsewhere too. He showed lots of anger but also had a heart attack. Altho I agree they are in a position of such beauty not far off from the movements of dance or taiji. With taiji tho I do a yang form and part of it is the pung li shi on (can't really spell it) but it involves doing one part of the form over and over in a circle alternating the right side then left and so on.

Wow! Thank you. Those tips are exactly what I have been trying to figure out all this time! And I like the idea of practicing koi over and over. I gotta do them as much as I draw peony. I started really getting serious with design a year and a half ago. My kois definitely looked floppy haha. And my biggest mistake has been .. not refrencing off of a real koi! To understand the features clearly. Also I have had trouble with rounding the scales with the body. Still have not fully understood that because I use other artists koi fish as a reference but do mine completely different. I never seem to copy a person's work. But really observing koi snd referencing off them will show me what you're talking about. Also I use those japanesw Copic markers. I also have used color pencils but don't fully understand how to use them. Also I've drawn waves over and over again and it took me a while to get to these but even so I still think these waves in the koi design look weird.

That second link you sent has some styles I've never even seen before! The blue dragon leg piece has waves and clouds I have yet to see. I learn a lot from it!it must be the Chinese eye for these things

Here a few recent ones.

Did you really?? Wow what a cool thing it is to come across someone like you on Tao bums! I see some tremendously talented artists in china. Those backpieces are amazing. I am just like that with just wanting lots of nature. I even want to develop some sort of style to tattoo neo styled landscape paintings on people. I also really enjoy the neo traditional work done today. It's like simple line work of a wolf for example but awesome realistic shading. I'm sure you knew of that though! I say that though because I now realize that this newer Japanese style is a neo irezumi. I like making really detailed peonies and what not. Is there any where I can show you my art for some advice? I don't know how to share pictures on here.

Taomeow you've got a whole lot of helpful wisdom. I wish I could study under you lol

I've read about the benefits of switching things up with your hands. Would this be a good way to access a balance? The point about how we suppress the parts we don't use is really interesting because that is a whole lot of wasted energy. Suprressing all the time

Ah very interesting points Chapter 15 sums up my questions perfectly. But ironically chapter 16 goes right along with it I believe and has always been a very clear light for me every time I read it. Empty your mind of all thoughts. Let your heart be at peace. Watch the turmoil of beings, but contemplate their return. Each separate being in the universe returns to the common source. Returning to the source is serenity. If you don't realize the source, you stumble in confusion and sorrow. When you realize where you come from, you naturally become tolerant, disinterested, amused, kindhearted as a grandmother, dignified as a king. Immersed in the wonder of the Tao, you can deal with whatever life brings you, and when death comes, you are ready.

In response to your article you shared.. I just said it was idiotic because it just kind of makes me more depressed about the fear I had when I started this post. But of course the negative anxious person with some logic may see things that the optimist cant. But it still ruins their life. I like what you say about the real nature of Lao tzu. So would you say the new age idea of taoism is wrong? Often I hear people explainin taoist as do what ever you feel right or what ever you're doing in the moment is within Tao or something. Obviously that is off because what we do today and what is really in harmony with the Tao are two different things. Our culture has gotten far away from the nature of Tao right? But what do we do when we can hardly change anything in the corrupt enviornment. Should we become the change in our selves like Lao tzu was. So wide that it can't be ignored anymore? Because that's my goal in mind haha.

You used to tattoo? What styles do you enjoy ?

I don't know about all that.. seems pretty idiotic. Of course the balance is to just see things as harmonious today. Tomorrow and every day since until and when ever! That seems to be the taoist way. Remember the vinegar is bitter to the Buddha sour to Confucius and sweet to lao tzu. Lao tzu didn't try to conVince him self it would one day become sweet. He knew vinegar and life was bitter and sour yet he saw through it and was able to experience sweetness in things.

I find small tattoos with meaning nice but being an artist I appreciate large pieces more just because it's fun!

I am apprenticing soon to learn to tattoo. I'd enjoy talking about tattoo art with you. I grew most with my art when I started learning Japanese irezumi style.

I can see why someone who is just trying to beat a porn and masturbation addiction would feel depleted from not having their drug of choice But it's a lot different when you are abstinent for other means like cultivation and growth. The purpose is very different from one to another.someone who is doing no fap hoping to be a chick magnet and get big muscles to someone on here who is actively meditating and cultivating . The difference will be clear.

I will definitely ! Thank you