Taoway

Any fellow bums have a love for eastern art? The music and art in china to begin with literally put me in the clouds! Would love to talk and conect with some people who have a love for it. I have been practicing landscapes on rice paper for a few years so id love to share them.

Hello all, I am going to explain my story in hopes that some of you can help me relieve my self from the suffering I cause my self. I really have alot of faith in you all because your words and even just your presence and love for the tao have helped me so much so far. So currently I am 21 years old and I have come to understand many things that seem to be rare at my age or more so rare for any individual because as we know the followers of tao are sometimes very few unfortunately. I grew up very curious and loving but had terrible anxiety and attachment to my mother. I was so anxious that my parents knew it wasnt normal. I would constantly ask. What if what if this happens what if that happens. Which is a positive in the way that it has also fueled my wonder to question life and the way things work and are. But my parents had no other option but to rely on doctors to perscribe me to zoloft when I was 7. It may have helped a bit back then but I think being on such a pill is not good for the body especially as young as a 7 year old. My anxiety continued and wasnt as strong at certain parts of my life. A year ago i moved to another state to live with a past girlfriend I met online. I talked to her on skype and phone for 7 or 8 months then finally met her. Then a month after I got back from visiting she needed help so I moved in with her and her kids. It was difficult for me and overwhelming because I was not so experienced with independence. I left 2-3 weeks after. But I gave her the rest of the saved money I had. The experience of leaving was very painful and I was fighting terribly with a girl I just basically met. Even though I spent all my money and energy on moving her into a new place from her moms I still to this day felt like a failure. An emotionally weak beta male who cant stick to something I commit too. After leaving we stayed together long distance but broke up 6 months ago. She ended up some what replacing me with someone because I simply was deteriorating as a person. I dont blame her and she needs to look out for who will be trusted to help her create a family for her kids again. Since then I have been trying to find love for my self. But I have been obsessing about such egotistical things that make me "not good enough" I used to meditate with such enthusiasm. I would practice yang taiji form everyday sometimes twice. I would paint and skateboard and smile and connect with my mom. But even now as my mom helps me get past this. I cant even feel any energetic charge from a hug from her. I have become numb. I am going to try something new and go to a reiki healer my mom met in yoga. And hope that she understands how to remove energetic blocks. If that is even possible. I reach out to you amazing people who remind me of my truest self.. I ask how does one pick them self up from this? Most days I spend so much energy dwelling on an emotion that I am lacking and that I lost the chance to be connected with a girl and her beautiful children because I am so weak. And even look at my self as a child who will never grow up. She was 5 years older and I wanted so much to be able to step into thwt world of maturity. I have plans made to move back to my home town 2 hours away for a tattoo appreniceship. And I see it as thestart of my whole life. But I cant find the momentum! i got so close with most of my things moved down But I want to clear pain and blockage enough to do it confidently Im sorry for who reads this for how long it is But thank you so much for anyone who lends a hand I am so lost and my own internal therapy can only do so much sometimes. Thank you

Ah really! Small world! I want to be involved with something that helps people. And although it draws unnessecary blood.. I know that it helps many people to feel confident in their own skin! So I look forward to helping people with that.

Thank you friend your words have clear meaning and guidance. Best to you on your path as well!

this means alot to me, and i have questioned if that is the path i should take right now. Mainly pursuing my dream of being a chinese medicine practicioner / healer. But the stages in my life seem to take me to learning the trade of tattoo art first. To learn independence. From there it will be a bridge to what ever else i hope to achieve since it will give me the money to pay for college and a place to live on my own. But as for studying towards something, this can be done outside of a university. And i have often thought that if only i directed this excess energy toward gaining knowledge consitently then it will find balance. But i find it hard to be consitant. But with your advice i will be more diciplined with it . Knowledge is a gateway to life experiences. I want to learn japanese so i can connect with japanese people. thats one gate way. And i will take out more of my books and dive further into my studies . thank you

"https://embed.tumblr.com/embed/post/Ni7yh4vYF_3WgKO9ckcLMA/130968166387 does this work ? here is a landscape i finished a few months ago. As for amature expression i agree with you! any form of effort in expressing creatively is far from amature to begin with! best example is the chinese sumi e paintings often perfected by zen monks. The simple black ink paintings almost look like they are done by a child but as you look further you see that they created a detailed picture with just 2 strokes!

I have felt in a sexual way a longing to feel like a female. To feel that sense of freedom so I guess for me it feels like being a guy is so constricting.

I have felt in a sexual way a longing to feel like a female. To feel that sense of freedom so I guess for me it feels like being a guy is so constricting.

I cant seem to post a picture because it is too large. Anyone know how to post a picture correctly?

Painting takes some amount of skill .. I am far from that point of perfected skill but I do believe we all have the ability! Its just a matter of how inspired you are by other pieces of art in history to recreate something just as beautiful. I spent many years with ups and downs feeling like my art is mediocr, always striving to create something as beautiful as what I saw. Im sure you will find your medium in life of which you express your self with perfection! And im sure your already working on that talent

Damn thank you! Im still reading the lines your shared snd theyre beautiful. From what I have read chinese landscape painting is regarded as the most talented and enlightening also difficult to master of the chinese arts. It is beyond just a artful expression to the ancient chinese... it went hand in hand with their practice of yhe tao as you share in your post! The close up style of chinese art with animals insects and flowers and rocks is regarded as very important to the philosophy of the art. But the landscape is beyond it so I have read. But I often look on google for landscape paintings and those ones youve shared are by far the most breath taking they made my heart double beat. Thank you I saved them to my collection. I will reply more after finishing what you shared as far as Text.

A man named drunvalo melchezidek wrote a book caled the secret of the flower of life and he claims to have studied with thoth after he visited him in the 70s or 80s to the 90s... his information is interesting but crazy and odd. Unbelievable at times. I cant say if I can believe all of it.. but if I were too then it really sends me on spme journeys in my mind. I have read thoth is a incarnation of a character from Atlantis. More so a immortal body that lived onto egypt. Then hermes in Greece. Then st germain. Anyone else ever read that?

Could always activate your merkaba and travel space.. aka astral project I suppose

return of the fishing boat-chinese classic

Ive experienced that no mind state between thoughts in meditation. It was a really beautiful experience. I wasnt looking for any sort of cosmic experience in that moment like I was when I first started meditating. I felt my breath get very subtle as you said. My mind didnt have anything to think of! And my body was still. Oh so still. And since I experienced it once before, nothing is stopping me or anyone else from experiencing it by choice at anytime of the day!

Hello everyone i find an inner struggle and find I hard to overcome. I had a break up with a girl 5 months ago and she started dating someone who was my friend a week afterward. She was almost like the first of many things for me. Even with sex although I wasnt a virgin It was the first time sex ever meant anything. She was a mother of two children and her son really looked up to me. For her the relationship wasnt much of anything new but for me it was some sort of big event. I attached to it and identified with it far too much. I lost connection with my practice my path and everything else. I saw the beauty in the break up after I saw clearer and saw that I really have the freedom to appreciate free flowing love again. And cultivate a personal energy thats dependent on no one else. I really never want to attach to someone like this again. Im wondering if that is some sort of suppression of human nature or will only make me suffer more. But I want to cultivate enough stillness in my self to never truly feel I need someone else. I would always be open to connecting with a genuine hearted girl but I loath the fact that I may need thst connection to be happy. People generally say that humans need connection and intimacy but I also know its possible to free our aelves from such needs or at least transcend those needs if thst makes sense. What id like to discuss is how can I stop this post break up suffering? It must be caused by some sort of desire. A desire to change after the relationship. I compare my self to her new bf occasionally and get a surge of pain in my heart thinking of them together. I beat my self down a bit thinking im not over her while she seems to be completey in a new picture. Any words from you tao friends would be so greatly appreciated. This forum has helped me thus far. Thank you

Thank you friend, I will take this advice. I have occasionally thought that maybe its not best to think deeply into the meaning of this or that. And I am moving to a new place out of my families house for a tattoo apprenticeship. So that will be very nice. Also am going to join a zen center for a good weekly routine of practice

Hello all! My name is James. Im really glad to have found this forum, it shows me I am not alone with this love for cultivation. Spiritually freedom of the heartmind and the spirit. I have a deep enjoyment for all things eastern. I practice the yang style taiji and am slowly getting back into an everyday practice after a difficult relationship and breakup. I practice chinese landscape painting and japanese tattoo art. I find peace in observing oriental art and music. Im not too good at starting posts but I will improve! I look forward to connecting with you fellow ripples and reflections of the tao!