ilumairen

An old thread I started that is similar in some ways to this thread. Useful or not, is for you to decide.

Perhaps it may be beneficial to look closer at the buttons?

Hi cosmic4z, This is an interesting topic. And there is soo much that can come into play. Anger will color any interaction for the person carrying it, and inform their own understanding, responce and reaction to whatever is presented to them. Sometimes it is useful to understand this when confronted with verbal hostility. Are these individuals co-workers or family members, and where is the expectation of your interaction with their anger?

Some find value in sitting full lotus; some don't. Why would it matter if someone doesn't find value in what one individual personally does, unless the person is unsure of the value they themselves have found? Self assuredness and self trust don't require outside assurances and agreement.

A minor clarification; the idea of "trying to do good" is not what the teaching is pointing at in my understanding.

First, what is the purpose of blame, and what is accomplished through it? And what purpose would personal responsibility serve? To me it seems like the difference between a "you did this" that keeps oneself mired in the swirling chaos of a self righteous sense of self, and the ability to accept experience as mutually arising and understanding the great diversity of factors that enabled the unfolding of ANY experience. There is much more openness in the second imo, and this openness enables responsiveness and genuinely reciprocal interaction. And honestly, it just feels better.

And why not recognize it as a perpetual question?

Not words.. wisdom. Naturally arising wisdom..

How does the above align with the bit you highlighted? "because the notions of 'self and 'other' are equally imaginary"

It was agreement with what was set forth, and additional thoughts. And many times, if I take the time to post, it is as much a reminder to me as it is for anyone else who may (or may not) find worth in the sharing.

And there can be a propensity for looking for external causes when 'difficult' situations and emotions arise.. negating the gift that 'working with' painful or uncomfortable emotions can be - in essence 'bypassing'.

I don't believe the concept of tough love applies here. The very concept of it seems to be in contradiction to the naturally, and spontaneously, arising warmth found in the emptiness and clear light of our natural state. It is a looking to correct the actions of others, and prescribed action for oneself - under the guise of benefice. And still very caught up in the concepts it (the quoted passage) is pointing beyond. *edited to include "quoted passage" for the sake of clarity in expression.

I like ( ) how the teachings are expounded here: The Fivefold Teachings of Dawa Gyaltsen:

Recently been working again with the fivefold teaching of Dawa Gyaltsen: Vision is mind Mind is empty Emptiness is clear light Clear light is union Union is bliss Unsure if you will find it applicable.. Or useful to your contemplation. On another note there seems to be a genetic predisposition to certain preferences. In which case it could be suggested that likes and dislikes are part of the human condition, and passed on..

Then where is one residing?

A habit that is picked up can be put back down.

You can add what you feel is missing.. and be the change you wish to see in the process.

Your understanding is intellectual.. without the understanding of the experiential. And this is ok..

Having noticed the rewording of your post, true intimacy and sexual arousal are not always (or perhaps are rarely) synonymous. And until one finds the sacred in their own heart.. it will be very difficult to see the sacred in other.

Physiological response is natural - without the need for blame on either side.

To identify with the perceived injustice being done, is not the same as wanting that injustice done. This isn't helpful.

You don't 'got it' at all. I do like you - alot. It's ok to be angry.

The male is not praised for misogyny in this place.

Sometimes my ire with you... Shaking my head... When one isn't even acknowledging their own anger, one is not yet at the flowery forgiveness stage.

That is cruel and reductionist qicat. And a projection..