ganjaboy
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Morality of Physical Practices and the Dao
ganjaboy replied to ganjaboy's topic in General Discussion
I would denote a morally upright physical practice or exercise as something in one in which you are looking to develop yourself and test your limits / better your health and being for you, not for others or out of some sense of ego. That to me indicates a kind of sincerity that is intimate with the self without being completely about the self. My idea however is that your practice or discipline is only a component in a larger lifestyle in which you act in morally virtuous ways and spiritual practices far removed from yourself. -
Morality of Physical Practices and the Dao
ganjaboy replied to ganjaboy's topic in General Discussion
In that regard then, perhaps training for a sport or a physical discipline every day is a kind of daily practice. You put in your effort every day, nothing less, nothing more - there is a zen to that. I think I'll just not worry about it so much, do what I like to do for physical activity, and balance it with the spiritual component at the same time. I also happen to like creating and performing music - the direct opposite of an athletic (yang) pursuit, yet there should be no reason I cannot balance in my life.- 32 replies
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Morality of Physical Practices and the Dao
ganjaboy replied to ganjaboy's topic in General Discussion
Horus: The longer I cultivate the more meaningless physical strength seems to me, because i have so much going on inside spiritually and from an energetic point of view. So I think that my "root" is becoming more full via that means. I'm planning on about ten to twelve years of celibacy, so I think that in that time I should more than transcend the physical means in favor of the spiritual.- 32 replies
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Morality of Physical Practices and the Dao
ganjaboy replied to ganjaboy's topic in General Discussion
Interesting point. Whenever I have body-built or intentionally increased muscle mass in the past I have felt very strong driving polar yang forces at the same time, which at times left me uneasy. After all, physical strength can increase potential for violent action. I felt that what I was doing was anticipating violence and a physical confrontation, which I ultimately saw as merely one step already forward into a downward cycle. I don't lift currently, I just do bodyweight exercises and yoga. I also like to run, which I see as more beneficial for health on the whole because it's benefiting most limb systems in the body as well as the heart, and it clears the mind. The reality, I think, is that it's not necessary to have lots of muscle to feel like a man. Being a man to me implies handling your responsibilities, taking responsibility and dealing with the consequences of your actions, and taking care / providing for those you care about. If I build muscle but am still selfish and unrealized as a person, I'm nothing but a big strong child. -
I am celibate and have been practicing cultivation / jing retention for quite some time now, but have come to realize that it is unnatural long-term for a human to exist without experiencing occasional arousal of Kundalini energy. This is not to say to give in fully to lustful desires, but to at least allow the energy to flow through the body. Does anyone have any specific sexual yoga or meditation practice to offer apart from Chi-Gung, which I already do? Thanks.
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For the sake of discussion, I have done some bodybuilding since becoming retention / cultivation, and have actually had better results than I ever had before attempting the practice. I would imagine yoga would also be positive in due fashion. Keep the jing, the spirit improves, the body improves, the mind is clear and the heart is genuine. Cool stuff
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That all sounds great to me, thanks. From there I'd probably have to get a teacher for further advice on practice. This is apples and oranges a bit, but I visited a Buddhist monastery awhile back and learned that the monks are (obviously) all celibate...I would imagine they have very high-level energy transformation going on. I believe that sexual energy is very strong, and celibacy can and will drive you insane unless you are sublimating efficiently. Like I said, I'm a layperson (immature pun haha), but I don't think that means I can't also be aware of the energies and work with them instead of making mistakes in ignorance. It's all becoming clearer over time, which is good
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That all sounds great to me, thanks. From there I'd probably have to get a teacher for further advice on practice. This is apples and oranges a bit, but I visited a Buddhist monastery awhile back and learned that the monks are (obviously) all celibate...I would imagine they have very high-level energy transformation going on. I believe that sexual energy is very strong, and celibacy can and will drive you insane unless you are sublimating efficiently. Like I said, I'm a layperson (immature pun haha), but I don't think that means I can't also be aware of the energies and work with them instead of making mistakes in ignorance. It's all becoming clearer over time, which is good
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This middle path is something I could agree to. Maybe I should have a girlfriend, but at the same time be aware of the power of cultivation from time to time, energy transmutation for creativity, and the ability to express love without sex as well. That genuine, flexible sort of lifestyle seems very Daoist to me. I don't know if I could ever handle 100% celibacy, at least at this point in my life (20 years old). I almost feel like it can make me embody symptoms of mental illness or sexual dysfunction/disorder.
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Sorry, I misunderstood and thought you were supporting it. My intention isn't to be promiscuous, however I understand that sexuality is a natural and healthy desire. I'm just trying to find ways to channel it that are not detrimental.
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Interesting, thanks for clarifying. TBH, I almost feel like the goal of ultimate spiritual development compensates for the supposedly morally ambiguous notion of sex outside of a relationship. What is your belief with regard to that? Maybe that's why I continually feel as if I am losing my mind.
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Why?
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I have never felt LOVE before. Why ? Is there a fix ?
ganjaboy replied to mike 134's topic in General Discussion
To some extent, I think it's true, lol. I'm not saying women are evil. But if you are the kind of guy who is physically addicted to sex, women of the sort who wish to take advantage of you (and essentially, steal your chi energy) will pick up on this very quickly. If you follow this road you'll just become emptier and emptier, and the women you give yourself to time and time again will become more powerful. It works like this - the lower the jing and chi, the more you need (or at least think you need) sex. I've concluded that, as a male, the secret is to cultivate your jing and thereby chi, ridding yourself of the NEED to have sex with women. Then any relationship you have with a woman will by default be founded on love and not lust, and you will probably be a more interesting person as well. To the OP, If you are truly experiencing a lack of love, what you need is greater sensitivity. Lust blinds this sensitivity. You need to realize that sex encompasses only a part of what a relationship is; it's a flash in the pan. The older I've gotten I've felt this more and more. In greater sense it's about having a companion who cares about you, who makes you complete and who you complete, about having someone to spend time with and share life with. If you can't manually attenuate your hormones enough to feel this, do an experiment. For a week or so, eat modestly, and eat a diet that does little but cater to the very basic nutrient needs of the body, i.e. vegetables and fruit. At the same time, meditate and take note of all the evil and emptiness in the world, the cycles of destruction, hate, fear, intimidation. Are you really as strong as you think you are? Is your addiction to sex out of anything more than your own pleasure, are you in fact alone? You will fear a somewhat childlike need to cling to something, somebody, much as child clings to mother. THIS is an element of love - the warmth brought by companionship. Insensitivity tricks you into thinking that you don't have a heart and don't need anyone, anywhere, ever. -
I have never felt LOVE before. Why ? Is there a fix ?
ganjaboy replied to mike 134's topic in General Discussion
I'd like to say that I have felt the exact same way as the O.P. before. There was a time when I was only turned on by porn, or adult dating "hookup" sites. I was there on the interwebs looking for videos or pictures that i thought would bring me exactly what i was looking for in life. the pinnacle moment came for me when i realized that slowly, i was losing interest in everything in life except the destruction cycle. And, as hard as it is to spit out, that's the way it works. The female gender is made to endure, the male gender is made to do and create, then wither and die. Observe this in species of animals in their native habitat time and time again. I had gotten so low that the only thing I could be motivated by was my earthly nature to reproduce; I had, essentially, been hijacked by my own hormones. The cycle was --- use porn, get aroused, get off, feel shitty for awhile and accomplish nothing, rinse and repeat. at my lowest, i even went so far as to have a hookup with a girl i didnt even love. Inadvertently, I had given her my chi energy, as she left the encounter refreshed and energetic, and i was desolate, thinking that i would have gained something remarkable which was always out of reach. I got irritable, frustrated, my life was empty. I was missing something. I treated others unkindly, with repressed frustration, and a hidden layer of insecurity. I didn't know what it was to love. I don't like to admit it but drug use was what helped me to realize what I had been lacking. When I got high, I didn't feel horny and almost instinctively started to feel from the heart more. I rediscovered love for creativity, art, and even my parents. I recalled weeping when I reflected on the fact that they, as well as I, were growing older, having endured so much in life and seen me through everything. I attenuated the earthly realm just enough to allow myself to feel from the heart centers. It was difficult but I eventually quit porn after a couple attempts. It did myself a big favor because my body in turn adapted; I started getting aroused by clothed woman in everday situations. In college I got heavily into meditation and the Jing-Qi-Shen relation, and have been working on that to this day. I want to be a divine human, in essence, that is, male and female. i'm not just a sex robot, i'm an individual with an identity and a personality. i lost my personality for awhile, when i was acting more like an animal. But to live I need to actively practice and cultivate life to the best of my ability. Cultivating with a partner is good, I have done it. It's tricky though, because most girls will not understand if you don't orgasm or waste seed on every encounter. if it's a girl of the wrong type, they will only be satisfied with that because that is where they draw their chi energy. Avoid this type at all possible, they are energy vampires Chi energy CAN be felt in sex. but it's not sex of the animalistic type. it's sex that celebrates being human and actually celebrates love. chi can be felt in other areas as well....music,art, literature, conversation -
Ram Dass once said something, somewhere to the effect that we need to have one "me" watching all the other "me's". Does anyone else often feel that their concept of "self" is indeed fractured into many, many, many different selves that show up at different times? In my instance, there is the lazy me, the productive me, the heartless me, the generous me, the greedy me, the angry me, the sad me, the self-absorbed me, the kindhearted me, the homosexual me, the heterosexual me, the depressed me, the elated me, the caring me, the apathetic me, the me that finds meaning in everything and at the same time meaning in nothing, the me that is a dreamer and the me that is a realist. I am disturbed when I recognize selves that do not seem to come from a completely pure source, for instance self-absorption or vanity. i have struggled with feelings of bisexuality and didn't understand where any of it came from. But I don't know whether it is right to deem them as completely evil and needed purged, or whether to indulge them when appropriate and as balanced by other more heartful acts. I had a teacher once who told me the secret was integration, not destruction. any thoughts? thanks and peace
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Here's another perspective -- there's the mind-body-spirit connection, and how the three are closely interrelated. When I do yoga, which services the body, for instance, its physical nature reminds me to have a heart and a spirit which is very meaningful. It's like, one pole of a spectrum services the other, and they live in harmony. If I was all spirit, I would want to service the body, and if I was all body, I would need to service the spirit. For example, yoga will give you an aesthetic body. It indulges a certain yang (physical) driven self, the same one that looks at sex physically, for example. The Jews call it "yetzer ra". But from the impartial "me", it's saying "Ok, so you're servicing the physical self again. Good, but what about your personality and charm?" You see, this avoids you blindly following allegiance to a particular self. Does this sound like a healthy balance?
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I've posted relevant to this topic before. i'm in college and I'm currently in a relationship with a girl who I share a lot of common ground with both emotionally and spiritually. i had a one night stand and realized afterward that it was meaningless and basically a drain on my jing and chi centers (big surprise there). so i decided to find a long-term partner, because if i didn't i would probably just fall into complete depression. 100% celibacy didn't work out too well. since being with my girl I've really re-thought the concept of making love. Now i'm a taurus and we tend to be very horny, earth-rooted beings, i.e. we have a strong connection to the animalistic aspect of sex. but it's clearly stated that there can be no love in the same vein as desire. So what her role to me is is to "tame the bull" (she's a psychology major, so she understands partially where this is all coming from). i don't ever press her for sex. so far it's made things interesting, from an energy perspective it is somewhat fun being played with and occasionally having sex withheld, because that serves to strengthen the bond. also, it seems we both believe in quality over quantity, for one thing sex can get boring and there is so much else to do together lol. we've only had sex once a week since being together. I try to think of the energy curve as a bell curve. someone suggested to me, in the way of Melanesian peoples, to start slowly by caressing, hugging and kissing. that primes the fire; further on, i get hot and excited, like any guy would, but the difference is that i only let it go to a point. i breathe deep and remain conscious of the animal/human distinction, and also the fact that the intimacy i am being given is a gift, which means that i need to respond with love. so i shove aside the animal urge to reproduce and focus on bringing loving pleasure. as for staying clear of the edge, sometimes deep breathing alone works, other times i've had to numb it, though i'm trying very hard to not need any aids whatsoever because this should be mental. when it's all said and done i haven't dissipated any energy, what (i feel) i have given is love, not just an animalistic act. hugging afterward, talking, or even laughing brightens it up as well. i also do yoga immediately afterward which also dissipates some energy because it is a physical outlet of a different kind. the interesting thing is that i read that jing is a very dense substance, and i can literally attest to this; if i conserve jing during sex my body feels like lead. the interesting thing is that the more full of this intangible energy i sense myself becoming, the less and less i really feel like i NEED sex. it's sort of like, i've reached a benchmark, now i can focus on other things because i have been fulfilled again. i also sense a chi energy in myself the likes of which i had only ever observed in gay men. i think it's because most straight men don't practice sex the way i do haha. thoughts? PS: not kidding: jing conservation has promoted higher immunity in myself as well as muscle hypertrophy.....and i also grew a beard...wicked..
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update! are these realistic energy observations? when i have sex with my partner, when i lose jing, she GAINS chi energy (she enjoys when i come). When i do it is an offering to her of love. when i have sex with my partner, and don't lose jing, i GAIN chi energy and continue cultivating jing energy. i had a hookup in college with a meaningless girl, came (how could i even hope to explain cultivation??) and LOST both jing and chi energy. took me awhile to rebuild it up and i swore not to whore out my soul anymore.... some people might call me crazy, but this energy stuff is 100% true, i swear.
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I have a dedicated cultivation/meditation and practice sexual q-gong pretty much consistently now. Even though I have a partner I treat the relationship as an extension of the cultivation, which is good for the "relationship" part because I am always ready for her to share herself with me as the raw yang-desire (from the jing) is never satiated. This isn't a bad thing though! The idea is to take what is primarily an animal desire, let that flow through me, feel it, note it, but make the conscious choice to not waste this energy, and instead transform that into a yin-feeling. After that's done, i sort of have this feeling of "what is the big deal about?", and can cater with love to my partner's needs in a totally non-selfish manner. Even when my partner isn't around I get aroused normally during the day. I attempt to sublimate this energy. The best way I have found so far is, if I get a hard-on or lustful thoughts, to sit naked and cross legged in a quite room and meditate on the desire itself. Naked because it is, in my opinion, a relatively innocent way to feel in touch with your sexual center without being overly lustful. It's important to allow the lust feelings to pass through you (the horniness plays an element) but to make the intuitive realization that the desire comes from emptiness. I find it's best to envision myself in a situation in which I acted on lust, and to decide whether I would truly have been happy or not. Once I've let it go, I find that doing yoga is a great way to get rid of some of the heat. It's odd, but I feel like the true enlightenment comes when you feel sexually "full" and verified as a human but without the animal desire to commit an act of lust. Lust is an obstacle and I am curious to see if through enough cultivation I could rid the desire completely. By the way - I discovered that diet did play a role after all. My nocturnal emissions reduced to almost none since getting a partner, but especially after I became a vegetarian and stopped eating lots of "violent", dense or salty foods. I eat fruits and vegetable dishes with mild spices, and get protein from nuts and beans which are less harsh than meat. I also feel lighter and overall have more energy. Anyways - thoughts on all this?
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Methods for excess sexual heat dissipation
ganjaboy replied to ganjaboy's topic in Daoist Discussion
In particular I think it is that way for men, because (traditional) Western sex is a decharging act for them instead of a recharging one. The energy that some schools of Tantra, for instance, teach you to keep inside the body and ascend to the brain or heart gets wasted every encounter. The last time I brought myself to ejaculation it was so readily apparent how draining and destructive it was that I pretty much vowed not to do the same again, nor could I do so without bringing on self-hatred. The fact that I completed the 100 day challenge (without intentional spilling of semen) proves that the physical release of sex can be entirely done without, at least for me, and there are so many better ways to sublimate the energy instead. I legitimately think there is a place for self-experimentation and practice sexually (don't confuse with replacing a partner), but not really beyond the teenage years because by then (hopefully) you've figured this out. That said, I'm 19 and I am sure there are people older than me who haven't, lol. Whenever I lose essence I feel more earth-bound, unmotivated, and not as deep in any of my realizations or meditations for a period of time. Conversely, when I've retained for a long time I perceive a richness to life that isn't present when I'm spiritually empty. It doesn't just cause increased awareness of sexuality, it also makes you more liable to aggression, and at times, paranoia. That's why it's important to redirect it efficiently. The more I cultivate/retain however, the less affected I am by occasional nocturnal setbacks.- 5 replies
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Methods for excess sexual heat dissipation
ganjaboy replied to ganjaboy's topic in Daoist Discussion
I think that what you're feeling is just natural verification of your existence as a sexual being, and in my opinion there's nothing wrong with that. The desire isn't evil, it's just a feeling, like any other. But as Ram Dass said, you have to be the "me that's watching all the other me's." These states that you feel or find yourself in are always only temporary, just passin' through. There's the horny self yes, but also the jealous self, hungry self, embarrassed self, angry self, etc. I've been pretty amazed myself by the transformation of the physical sexual "need" to an internal feeling almost. I've found with my partner that over time you can morph the need to have sex in an animalistic sense to almost just cosmic vibration that connects through space. Like, her and I can sit across the room from each other and i'm still feeling vibes. It's great fun actually lol. It works out well too because if she doesn't feel like having sex, i'm aroused just by her presence and can be content with that. it reminds you of the shortcomings of the physical attachment to sex. I feel like when you orgasm/ejaculate, it's the most physical manifestation of this energy possible, i.e. its lowest outlet. But if you don't do that you'll find that the energy comes through in your life in other ways. You literally will physically change, an effect somewhat similar to steroids, and your eyes will be brighter. You'll also have way more energy and motivation if you are careful, but it can also lead to depression if done incorrectly In a nutshell, my observations - When the jing (ç²¾) is full you're reminded of all there is to life besides sex, and you're also more compassionate. When it's empty you want to do nothing except have sex. Sex addicts are addicted to the physical release of sex and are low or empty on the internal yin-energy that we seek to cultivate.- 5 replies
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Cat: thanks, I read some of the first book, it resonates pretty strongly with what I am experiencing. IMO, the love occurs when the natural instinct is conserved and the essence is retained, which then converts the driving yang energy into a cooling yin energy. it makes a man never again question what it means to feel like a man, because you just do. also i find that i am less apathetic, happier in general. the practice celebrates the male / female polarity, and yet at the same time the truth that they can also are one. looking to nature for further evidence: to waste the jing-essence would be to live as if i was anticipating dying soon. in the wild, the male animal of several species spreads its genes and then withers and dies.
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I am a 19 yr old male and i have been currently been celibate for 30 days. In that time, I have already seen great transformation of mind and my psychological approach to the world. I feel that I have gone from being a rather ordinary slacker with little self confidence to a much more confident and determined individual. I don't know how else to describe the changes that have occurred except to say that it has been made clear to me how damaging self-pleasure was to my soul and mind. my intellectualizing of it is that the more often jing-essence is released, the more empty the soul and heart become, the less confident a man will feel, as well as more physically connected to the world. i went from being a user of pornography, whom was uncomfortable around women, to a guy who can casually engage any girl in conversation. i am aroused by real women. Girls seem to sense this energy and are more drawn to me as well..... i get hit on by girls now more than ever, lol. i was always self-confident about my size, as i am only 5'5" and 110 lbs, but now i truly do not care...because i can feel the inner fire burning also -- statistically, I believe it is true that men experience more orgasms than women. this addicts men to the physical aspect of sex, and they will do anything to have that physical experience, with ANYONE, hence, prostitution, et cetera. since women are more conservative, they are more discriminating with regard to partner and they must have their heart-energy attached as well. they also are more in-tune with the heart and soul orgasms that can occur in life... since being celibate, i receive joy and orgasm of SPIRIT by simply being in the COMPANY of women, if that makes sense. the "jing", or fierce, intense, primal willpower which is present as a result of being celibate, i channel into music, which is my passion. i can create more fiercely than ever before, and my determination is strong as an ox. i do not need to waste this willpower on expenditure of genetic material, lol. so, haha....the path to enlightenment....am i doing it right?
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