cosmic4z

So, I’ve been using a particular online discussion forum (not this one) for a few years now, and found it to have a very wide spectrum of people, with all personality types, political views, IQ levels (!), life experience etc. Now, a very wise person once told me, "You can't polish a turd". I think the meaning of the phrase is, you just can’t help or educate some people (perhaps they don’t want to change), and if you try, you just end up with ‘doggy do do’ all over yourself. The fault of course, is always with the one doing the ‘polishing’. To engage in the act of polishing a turd, you must first assume that you are in possession of facts, truth, wisdom; and, that the other guy is ready and happy to recieve the wisdom you have to impart. All, massive assumptions. There's also an assumed superiority. Uck! I mean, why are you even trying to educate them in the first place? It’s not like they’ve come to you, and offered to pay you for the privilege of you educating them. So, what’s in it for you? I’m talking about myself of course; just trying to understand my motives, such that I avoid ‘doggy do do’ in future… Any thoughts? Thanks p.s. I think this forum seems a lot nicer, but then I've only been here like 2 seconds (practically, compared to most of you).

Thank you. I completely agree.

We're all in different places aren't we!? I often see character flaws in other people, that are the flaws I've also had in the past. I feel like we're all in the process of change, perhaps some change at a slower pace than others; but change is inevitable. No? What do you think? Is it possible to be a snake, and to never change? Or to change at such a slow pace as to be negligible?

Fantastic, thank you for your suggestions. I think for sure, when I find myself in a battle, something has certainly gone wrong. Perhaps taking things slowly makes more sense; and then tailor things based on their response, or withdraw altogether. I also think, minding my own business is the big lesson here for me. It's not like I've got my own shit sorted 100%, and I can afford to go about 'fixing' other people. It's incredibly presumptuous of me to think I'm even in a position to do so. Implies I am wiser, more knowledgeable and have more life experience that the other guy. There's also the big factor of my motivation.

Wooopi Goldberg (apologies if that’s not the correct spelling of her name), has back-peddled on her assertion that the holocaust was about mans inhumanity to man, rather than about race. Of course, her original instatement was clumsy and insensitive, and on the surface of it, it’s clear the holocaust was very much about race, and she absolutely should have considered the feelings of those with ties to historical atrocities. I wonder though, if her original impulse was to de-emphasise the importance of race, and to assert our common shared humanity. Isn’t that a direction we should be going in, less seeing ourselves as separate distinct races, and more seeing ourselves as one human race?

Thank you Nungali. Yes, on a public forum, other people may get some value for any observations or insights we post. I feel like I kind of got in to an ego battle with this chap, it was clear he wasn’t open and self-reflective, and that what I was saying just wasn’t resonating with or helping him. I’ve nipped it in the bud now, but should have done so earlier. I’m left feeling I’ve not really helped this person, probably just pissed him off, and I really don’t want to be doing that, it just doesn’t help anyone. We’re all in different places I guess. I need to take a break from that other forum!

Chess for me. It's good.

I'm trying to point something out, in a round about way, perhaps I'm being too obtuse and indirect though. Also, it occurs to me, a person who walks in to a cinema half way through the showing of a film, and after only viewing that film for 2 minutes, well, perhaps he's not in such a great position to pass any kind of judgement on the film in question.

Thank you Iliketurtles! May check out audiobook at some point. Would be great if they made a video game of The Expanse, imagine it could well happen. My understanding was that that was the original intent, scripting a universe for a video game.

Just finished watching S6 of The Expanse. Loved it. I thought it could have been a lot better though. Wasn’t a fan of Naomi, way too wish washy and over emotional and weak. Amos and Bobby were more to my taste, gritty and pragmatic, no nonsense go getters. Anyhow, as I say, it’s very entertaining, and I enjoyed the protomolecule and alien life form themes. Think it had potential to be legendary, but, I don’t know what it was, just feel it fell a little short of its potential somehow. Would deffo recommend it still. Kinda sad it’s all over, only 6 episodes on S6, and no more seasons?

I think it may well be a common human tendency. Like we have an idea, how we think other people perceive us (which is not the same as how others actually perceive us, if they’re thinking about us at all). Which I don’t imagine they are (thinking about us), because we’re just not significant to them, such that we would justify them paying us anything more than a passing thought. Still, our concern that others think well of us, this can influence us in ways that may not be obvious. I know this, because I recognise the trait in myself.

No. I’m full of ****. Don’t be impressed!

Surely the distinctions of natural and super-natural only exist conceptually within our minds? We experience stuff. Sometimes that stuff neatly aligns with our scientific models of reality, sometimes not. It’s all just experience though, not sure what the big deal is. Also, ‘reality’ itself is a construct that exists within our minds, as are notions such as exists and not exists.

I can only speak for myself. I don’t think it’s a good thing, this needing or desiring to impress other people. I think I’m mostly past it. I also think I want to be liked and well thought of. So probably, I’m not past it. It’s a journey.

I’m getting a vibe, something occurred to me. Why do people have a need to impress other people? I’ve definitely been there myself. Now I’ve gone past that stage and I’m just way better than everyone else here.

So, I really wanted to thank everyone who posted on this thread; thank you for sharing your thoughts and insights, it's appreciated. The situation hasn't changed; but how invested I am in it, certainly has. Time seems to have this effect. What churns our 'noodle' one day / week / month - is a faint memory the next. I think this thing, it must have affronted my sense of right, and also, there's probably a greed (concern for the future) element to it. I suspect, letting go and not giving a flying **** was the response that the situation required of me. Thanks once again all.

I have a quandary. A situation has come up. I have recently become aware of something. I am unsure as to the wisdom of acting in response to this something (and if so, what form that action may take) or to do nothing or ignore it. So, seeking wisdom really. I generally feel, when one is in a state of uncertainty, to do nothing, just wait for more clarity and possibly a right course of action to reveal itself, is best. Also, problems come up in life, and I feel we need to find the answers within ourselves, rather than delegating the responsibility to others, to tell us what to do etc. There has to be value in getting other people’s perspectives on stuff though, reflecting on that and contrasting with our own perspective?

This is true, I'm questioning the validity of what I'm feeling, or really, the reasons for why I'm feeling what I'm feeling. I appreciate I'm being vague too; so it's difficult to offer specific advice. Part of me is feeling, if I ask others what to do, I'm kind of out-sourcing a decision I should be making myself (when perhaps others are not fully aware of all the ins and outs and history). Maybe it's better to make our own decisions, even if they are wrong or misguided, as we'll never learn from our own mistakes if we don't... However, I also feel I want to be more specific. It's a complex situation though, feels like a tangled knot with lots of threads, that need gently and skillfully prying apart in the right order. There's multiple perspectives (literally several people involved) and ways of looking at this. It could well be that I'm out of order, for making it in to any kind of issue (if only in my own head and on this thread). I've got something else (unrelated) going on at the moment too, mom has just gone in to hospital; but I'll try and expand more on the situation as soon as I can.

Thank you to everyone who has responded. You have all given me things to contemplate and mull over. Super appreciate it. The comment relating to where an impulse to act is coming from, felt very much pertinent to my situation. It's been a few weeks now; but I remember back then, questioning my own motive for action (and reasons for feeling how I do about the situation). I haven't taken any action thus far; but I still feel the situation persists and is unresolved. I believe I felt (and still do feel) somewhat slighted or diminished by my discovery. How I am feeling though, is built on top of residual feelings of belittlement (in relation to one person) that have been brewing for decades. So I am perhaps reacting to my own history and stored resentment.

While it's clearly a better investment of time and energy to focus on something more positive and constructive, let's say, for some reason (shits and giggles) you wanted to infiltrate a cult, with a view to being disruptive and ultimately dismantling it (eroding the credibility and influence of cult leader etc). How would you go about doing that (in a manner that doesn't harm yourself of course)?

Yes!! Hendrix is frikkin awesome. And Pali Gap in particular, is such a sublime and beautiful piece of music.

You know when you clench a muscle, and it sort of tightens, there is tension and rigidity and a kind of tightness in that muscle... Well, I find at times, my mind does the same. It's like trying too hard to solve a problem, thinking too much.. Does anyone else notice that? I'm sure it's extremely common-place. I just had an awareness that that's what ai was doing with my mind, and that it's a theme (often happens with me). My teacher, once said to me 'relax'. I think perhaps he didn't mean just physically. Life is a struggle though. What's a chap to do?

Excuse my ignorance; but if someone is critisizing a thing or making a comparison, surely they're not critisizing the actual thing, but their perception of the thing? In a way, they're not so much talking about the thing, as they are talking about themselves.

I'm thinking, aside from any other consideration; what he's doing must be really good for his state of mind. Especially in contrast with a typical person today, who's saturated with gadgets, screens and gizmos. I work with that crap all day, and long term, I find it has quite a pernacious effect on the mind. We have a sceduled power cut in the morning (they're exceptionally rare here in the UK), so I won't be able to use computers; quite looking forward to it...

Thought this may be of interest to some. It's the YouTube channel of a chap who builds everything from scratch, only using resources available in his environment. It's basically like he's living in the stone age. Amazing how resourceful he is and what he actually manages to put together; everything to keep himself alive; buildings (huts with tiled roofs and underfloor heating!), weopons, food, tools... https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAL3JXZSzSm8AlZyD3nQdBA