Daniel

@Scholar, I have not forgotten about your dilemma. I am still researching it. A quick question though... which do you think describes your situation better... ignore 'Weak Will' for a moment. Which is more true about yourself: "My heart is cold" "My heart is unmoved" "My heart is indeterminate" "My heart is undefined" ? Best wishes to you and yours in the mean time,

My friend the demon does not exist. It is an archetype. A gate, a pit, a box with an open lid that craves and craves and craves with no end in sight. It is nothing more than an empty husk of nothingness. ( That's why you are able to *crush* it ) I promise, the demon is an empty vessel. It is a "non-thing". Eta: I suppose I should name this non-thing, since I'm pretty sure I know it. It is Lilith. A non-thing disguised as TrueLove. But really it's a bottomless pit of desire. The desire to help those in need is right in its wheelhouse. @helpfuldemon, the 7 pointed star, the goat... that's Lilith.... The blue geometric symbol, sounds like a binding. in our PMs I mentioned an "Other God" that I know...That's Pan, one of the greek "other Gods". and He/She ( Pan ) prefers the SriYantra. not the 7 pointed star. Hopefully that clears up some confusions...

It's good to dream this way. The amygdala releases negative unhealthy and incoherent thoughts during deep sleep. ( link ) It's also good to stop trying to help others. From a karmic perspective, helping others removes their opportunity to redeem themselves. It's a double whammy, so to speak. It harms both them and you even though the intention is good. The best anyone can do, imo, is heal themselves and then help others to heal themselves. But trying to heal someone else, not oneself is like walking a tight-rope... That is the middle path, the grey path. I'm proposing the Right Hand Path. Heal ourselves. Help others to heal themselves. Teach them to fish... so to speak. But never to do the fishing for them. Does that make sense? It is a way of surrendering the fate of others while also not surrendering the fate of others. It's a loophole in the karmic system which can be exploited virtuously. Perhaps it, the loophole, could be named ..."doing good and turning away from evil without interference in The Eternal Dao"?

I love-love this:

Good Morning @helpfuldemon, Here are my comments: Maybe it's better to just "take a break" and not retire for ever. Also, perfect Wisdom is an impossible goal for a mortal. There is always more to learn and explore but inside ourselves as human animals or inside ourselves as divine sparks of life. ( or both ). I would not label it "straw-man". And your realm of expertise is in your Self. You carry it with you wherever you go. Most people call it "intuition", and most people gain it as they grow older, in their 60s and 70s. Give it another 15 years and then, ( G-d willing ) we can meet up back here on TDB and talk about your expertise and ideas and the realms which you have explored. Via Private Message, you declined assistance from me, but this statement ^^ sounds like you are still asking for help. Do you want rid of the curse, or not? My approach would be to strengthen and reinforce your humanity, leaving leas and less room for the curse to be an active force in your life. Eventually, the curse will live with you in a tiny little bassinet of your own design. This bassinet will exist deep in the recesses of your heart. Depending on your motivations and inherent talent, you may be able to banish the curse altogether, or perhaps it will simply remain sleeping, happy and content. Either way, the end goal is not to destroy the curse, only to put it in its proper place and keep it happy so that it does not further negatively interfere with your mortal life. I respectfully disagree. You sacrificed in the past, you can turn away from the curse and regain a lot of that. My friend, there is nothing wrong with seeking knowledge, your intentions sound pure. You simply climbed up the wrong branch of the tree of knowledge. Just climb right back down, and start over. But please understand, it wasn't a waste. Your knowledge of this other branch can help tremendously in self realization, enlightenment, spiritual healing, etc... It's a faculty, a tool that you will be able to use. And BTW, once you get this figured out, you will be in a somewhat exclusive club. Not many people get the opportunity to turn it all around like you do. You should consider yourself lucky to have figured out that you are aon the wrong track while you are still young and not in your 70s. If you want to start this process, you need to reclaim your own humanity, stop referring to yourself as cursed or as a Demon. You are not an empty vessel regardless of what any Other Gods or inner voices might be telling you. You are Human. That means you have Human potential until your final moment and your final breath. Ditch the idea of making a difference for others, and focus on making a difference for your Self.

Hello and Welcome.

Nice to meet you Bo Welcome to TDB.

Yes, respectfully @SongShuhang , @Nungali is correct. Your model about swimming in magma is not a good one. In the example you offered, energetically, the magma would nullify into you. You would not be swimming in magma, the magma would become part of you. It would be like the light of the sun nullifying the light of the flame of a bic lighter. In this analogy you are the sun, and the magma is the light coming off of the bic lighter. In theory, one could attempt to experience what it is like to be swimming in magma, but this would be an internal practice. It has nothing to do with a powerful body and increasing the base temperature tens of thousands of degrees. ( Disclaimer I am offering an academic opinion, I do not practice Daoism )

Because we are not Craving / Dominance are naught Not that it matters...

A splash, It is gone. And so am I , so are you... Because: "we are not?"

Welcome @Antonio108, It's nice to meet you.

OK. That's super helpful. I'll see what I can find.

OK. I'll see what I can dig up. My first stop is Tanya, the teachings of whom is titled "The Alter Rebbe". The condition is described as "lowering of the heart". I'll see what I can find. It may be a week or so before reporting back. If you don't mind, I need to know your religious background. This is important so that I can focus my reply in terms that are easily understood. Would you please tell me if there was religion in your home as a child? If so, which religion was it? Or perhaps you came from a more modern home where religion is not important? In addition to Daosim do you practice or follow any other religious beliefs?

Will is a very complicated and subject, yet it appears on its surface to be very simple. My personal opinion is that Will is best described in my own practice, Chabad Chassidus, not Daoism. Would you like me to try to dig up some resources that will help from a Chassidic perspctive? I'm not a Rabbi, so I'm not qualified to teach or explain the concept of WIll. But I can probably find some other sources that explain it, without teaching or explaining it myself. If that sounds interesting to you, please let me know.

Yeah, me too. Anger is very difficult for me to control. I'm actually just now starting to be able to subjugate it. But it will always be with me... Best wishes,

If it's not existential despair, it could be emotional let down. Also you do sound ( as others have pointed out ) like you are in a Nihilistic phase. Perhaps this *is* as good as it gets for you, I don't know. There is a warm, cuddling, welcoming, optimistic version of Nihilism, but I don't think it will help. The other more mundane explanation of your condition comes from the definition of Megalomania. It fits, only if you previously wanted to use the occult to become like G-d, like in the story with Adam and Eve. But then after years of work and devotion, instead of becoming a like G-d, you ended up as a Demon instead. The emotional let-down from this is very similar to the emotional let-down someone experiences when they become disillusioned and realize that they ( the Megalomaniac ) are really as Mega has they thought. However, I see that you PM'd me, so we can continue this conversation behind the scenes.

@helpfuldemon, OK, I've read your story. I am saying this with complete sobriety, I understand. If you want my take on the situation, I'd be happy to try to help. Pro bono. Just free friendly advice from someone you don't know on the internet. Open ended offer.

OK. you have my attention. I know this "other" God. How were you approached?

Right. You're having existential dread/despair? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Existentialism#Angst_and_dread Among other things?

{ ** record skips a beat ** } What? I'm reading your writing, and you say you're not talented? You're at least a very talented writer. At least, and probably very very intelligent... Sorry for the mini-rant just now... Nawh.... come on now... you're on TDB, now. Here, let me virtually show you around... Over here down this little Rabbit Hole is 'intriguing'. I suggest the music thread. What folks listen to round here is 'intriguing'. The very definition of intriguing. Over here, down this little hallway is the exciting world of the occult. I don't go over there. Too exciting for me. As for concerned. My friend, that's where you are right now, the Welcome room, full of concerned DaoBums. Welcome aboard, we've been expecting you... ( sort of ).

Don't worry, this too will pass.

I agree with every word. I cannot find any faults in your logic or reasoning. Further, I agree that "we have the right to participate in life in an animal fashion".

Thank you so much for doing so; your elaboration is precisely the information I was missing from your previous reply. Thank you very much, I will if needed. 🙏

It takes time... you'll figure it out.

agreed. And well said. I'll try to remember that. The dance metaphor is wonderful. I'm fighting with getting my password reset for this site; but I'll check it out when I'm able. Two realities, one truth. The good / folly dichotomy both exists and doesn't exist. That's the two realities. However, the one truth is, we can only be in one reality at a time. Two realities, one truth. I choose to live in the reality where there exists good and folly. Although I could choose to live in the other world too. It's a perk of being self realized. But I can't really be in both at the same time. I think, again, it's a feature of The Eternal Dao. That's the whole deal with immortals and ascended masters, etc... But don't quote me on any of that...