Stilltrying

I have done a fair amount of researching different religions and spiritual systems, and I've arrived at somewhat of a dead end. I'm sort of at a loss of how to proceed further. Who or what do you think is the god of this world? What has your experience been?

Has anyone managed to cultivate and integrate their awareness and apply it to a skill? Maybe even specifically harnessed it for a particular skill or skillset? I know some musicians and athletes have spoken highly of meditation and religions/spiritualities involving it outright Im at a point in life where a lot has fallen away and is still falling away, in good and bad ways to me, and ive gotten to a point where i just want to fully go into a pursuit. Maybe this is a mid-life crisis? Or just crisis? Im unsure, but its something ive wanted to do for a while Thank you for reading

I have been meditating for years now and have unfortunately given herpes by a dishonest partner. I know the power of qi/prana. Im wondering if there is a way to energetically rid myself of the herpes while its in its early stages, whether by a solitary practice or a healing done by another practitioner? Im sorry if this isnt the place for this, i am just very sad and desparate for a way out of this that isnt just suppressing herpes with prescribed antivirals- i want it gone. I appreciate any advice youre all able to give on the matter