Cadcam

I'm not so sure God is love. Being invisible, the gods can do what they like. I suppose that is their privilege, being immortal. I suppose too, that they get bored and want to cause a little mischief.

I guess I shouldn't say i crave these things, craving implies some sort of carnal hunger. It's just a want that I notice when I find no satisfaction.

Yes, I feel bad energy when I cuss, or do anything immoral

I have a craving to do things, and enjoy life, but nothing is appealing to me, and the few things I do don't satisfy. Then there is this want for some kind of closure: a transition from one state to the next, but life just goes on and on. I don't think, or can't, rather, and nothing makes me more aware than I am. So I sit, or sleep.

I dont know, i can only say that nothing satisfies. I'm like a blank slate. I don't feel love or joy hardly at all. I don't feel much of anything.

Yup, you got it right.

I never claimed to be Buddhist and if you read the first entry of this post, it clearly defines what i think Satanism is. And yes, I sit and think nothing quite a bit, and do very little.

If you read my post, that was in my past.

I'm an independent thinker, a monk of my own design. I don't ascribe to any system but my own.

I've come to accept that humans are not inherently moral. We are driven first by hunger and security, then lust. As we age we receive training that instills moral character. This training has been developed by saintly thinkers. I wonder if we aren't manufactured by a much older society, that already found a way to overcome the death and need for bodies, and programed our species to easily learn. I certainly know there is something else out there, and as a child, had voices that guided and inspired me. I've also witnessed that spirits can speak through me, and control my body. Ultimately I think all is Chaos, with the gods bringing order.

Well yes, they are actual experiences, that we carry with us.

Yes I think it's the variety of species, and ideas. I feel like these dreams are on different planes, with some different laws about time and matter. I feel like in those places, things are accelerated and more intense for those who visit them

Idk, it felt very real. I know that the mind can imagine whole scenarios on its own, and I suppose that when we sleep our true inner self interacts with our history, and knowledge, and ideas, but sometimes it seems to be coming from an external source.

Thats a thought. I never considered drawing a distinction between my state and the state of others. I used to be filled with compassion but now I don't feel it. I treat all people with the same respect.

Yes I can still function without thinking. I've noticed that there are many layers to consciousness, and a variety of thoughts. I still occasionally get some, but I don't actively use my mind and inner voice. Often I hear other voices say things. I have very vivid, realistic dreams. The other day I dreamed I was part of a group of people who committed themselves to advancing life on Earth. At the end of my dream, a voice said "there is nowhere as exciting as this planet"