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When you say therapist, is this just a casual use of the term? There is an enormous distinction between a therapist, psychologist, and psyciatrist, as I am sure you are aware. I know that this website is more supportive of alternative healing methods, but you need to couple qualified psychiatric help with psychotherapy and whatever else you are doing. A therapist or psychologist can only talk you through what sounds like an unimaginably torturous mental life. Of course psychoanalysis, talking, religious help, and guided meditation can all be very therapeutic for you, but you are dealing with something that sounds quite serious, painful, and urgent. My advice, for whatever its worth, is that you find a good psychiatrist, someone who won't simply throw pills at you, but who will listen and understand what you are experiencing and who can make a decision on what the best medical choice is for you. Best of luck to you.

U want to explain this one? Is this sarcasm im too dense to pick up on? Breathing is really the first and only problem that you need to 'worry about' so to speak. Correct, relaxed, natural breathing is a prereq for any functional energetic practice. You're not going to get much out of your qigong or meditation if you're breathing 30 times a minute through your mouth. Maybe a virus.

Ah this is very wise and well explained. props on the simplicity. I really think that's the practical essence of most Taoism.

This seems pretty good to me. The 'I' which narrates your daily events, which brings 'you' back into the past through the stories you tell yourself and memories you hold onto, and the 'you' which is projected into an ideal future are all marks of the ego. Common buddhist and taoist philosophy would say that you are not you, so to speak. which is really to say that you are not a cohesive entity. the ego is muddled and loose network of memories, internal personas, patterns, voices, projections, and internationalizations of other people which 'you' (referring to ego) frantically hold together as an image of yourself while repressing the negative desires and patterns of your unconscious self. I think you are right on to say that the ego has its place especially in social relations, without an ego, or without a healthy ego one easily slips into madness. The true task is to recognize that you are something more than your ego, more than the 'you' which you have built up over the past...however many years. The difficult task is to patiently work at moving towards a place where you can cognitively watch the ego without being affected by its (your) stories and movements.

lol explain to me the biochemistry here. i didnt know the energy was capable of conscious discrimination.

I wouldn't call it a distraction. If you genuinely adopt the prediction that the world will end by 2012, then you have a pretty specific and rather short time line to achieve the goals you have set for yourself. It also raises larger spiritual questions. What is the purpose of spiritual development if the your existence is confined to the next four years? Even if you determine that it is still important, what can you realistically achieve in this timeframe? I think it's a very interesting discussion, although I am quite skeptical of apocalyptic prophecies.

what do you mean by the wuji 'dimension?'

new here. hoping to learn from others and share my experience.