doc benway

Rubaru Roshni A powerful film!

I don't know your daughter's health conditions but I know several people who use cannabis products successfully for sleep. Anti-histamines can be quite effective for some people, especially Benadryl (diphenhydramine). I prefer a supplement-free, drug-free approach but either of those may be worth a try if nothing else works. I used to practice Tibetan style dream and sleep yoga very consistently but I've gotten away from it recently. When I was engaged in the practices, my sleep was better than it's ever been before or since. Here are some simple suggestions that help me, most of which were recommended by my dream yoga teacher - 1. Begin winding down the day with the intention to quiet the body, speech, and mind for a few hours before going to bed 2. Stop all electronic stimulation, including television, at least 2 hours before bed. 3. No heavy meals or exercise within 2 hours of bed time. 4. Create a sacred and supportive environment in the bedroom. 5. Keep electronics away from the bed, on the other side of the room. 6. Make sure to get some vigorous physical activity several hours before sleep, not too soon before bed. 7. Abstain from alcohol completely. 8. When lying down to sleep, you may visualize being surrounded by beautiful, loving, supportive beings - dakinis, angels, whatever speaks to you. Imagine that they are there to help you fall asleep and to watch over you during sleep. 9. Keep a dream journal by the bed. Whenever possible, especially if waking up in the middle of the night and first thing in the morning, write down any dreams you can remember. 10. When unable to sleep, it is good to try and allow the body and mind to become still. If that stillness can be maintained for a few minutes, sleep will come. 11. When waking up in the night, first try to simply rest the body and mind in stillness. If this does not work, get up and occupy yourself for a while but NO ELECTRONICS. Read, write, meditate, do some gentle stretching, draw, anything to engage the body and mind gently. When tired return to bed. For me, meditation usually works well. I'll get out of bed, if necessary, and meditate on my cushion for 20 minutes or so and I"m usually ready for sleep. Good luck to you both! PS - my teacher wrote a book on dream yoga that is filled with useful information - Tibetan Yogas of Sleep and Dream by Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche. He also offers an online workshop on the subject which will be starting in November.

Haha! The tendon is not worthless, it can be used for lots of good stuff!

Haven't had a listen yet but I just heard that The Desert Sessions continues and the next 2 installments are due out in October. https://pitchfork.com/news/josh-homme-announces-first-new-desert-sessions-album-in-16-years/

This is also seen in Dzogchen practitioners and is not always so subtle. The teachings say that while the Natural State needs nothing and is spontaneously perfected, the practitioner is not. Unfortunately, some practitioners erroneously conflate themselves with the self-perfected state itself, ignorant of their deviations. It can be a serious mistake.

And more heart.

I would offer that the rate of extinction of species, the loss of 30% of North America's birds in the past 50 years, and related occurrences are ample evidence that the Earth (which I take as organism-environment) is dying. It's more than simply rendering the Earth uninhabitable, we are killing her with far more rapidity than the normal background extinction rate. It's been estimate it's happening ~1,000 times more rapidly than the background rate currently. Granted this is a challenging thing to measure or predict but I feel humanity has become a cancer on this Earth. Looking at us from a medical perspective, our activities and the consequences are eerily similar to the behavior and effects of a malignant tumor. Don't get me wrong, buy the bike and enjoy the fuck out of it. Lord knows I'm contributing to the problem as are nearly all of us to some degree. A bike is far less toxic than a car (with the possible exception of all electric but even they have a considerable footprint). My only objection to bikes is that I used to deal with the consequences of the wrecks which can be horrific. I live in an area with very high traffic density so I wouldn't get near one in my neighborhood. We need to enjoy the things that get the juices flowing, do so with some awareness and consideration for our Mother, and look inward at our own contributions to the problem and responsibility to help. I think it's rather presumptuous and useless point the finger at others, particularly when we know next to nothing about their lives.

No way you can learn it properly from a book but it’s a good resource.

Mostly a Tenzin Wangyal thing but also a Bön thing. Tenzin is a very progressive teacher and no longer a monastic. He gave up requiring or even offering samaya vows of his students many years ago. He also has been teaching tantric practices from the Mother Tantra without requiring students to walk the entire tantric path, practices like dream and sleep yoga, tsa lung, tummo, bardo, phowa, 5 elements, and chöd. There has been some degree of relaxation of requirements for these practices in Bön in general as well. I believe it is because there is a feeling that the world is desperately in need of these practices. I also suspect there is a recognition that the translation of tantric practices and the guru-student relationship to the West is problematic and the teaching of the full tantric path to non-monastics in the complexity of Western society is very challenging. The intention is to disseminate them as widely as possible both to keep the practices alive but also to offer them for the sake of anyone who has the karmic connection and access. For example, the most senior lama of the order recently published a book detailing the tantric practices of tsa lung and tummo. Lots of books are out there as well as online teaching opportunities. The Bön also emphasize the Dzogchen path for similar reasons and the samaya requirements are different in Dzogchen. In Dzogchen, our obligation is to the source itself, our Nature - not to a teacher who is simply an ornament of the base. At least that's my rudimentary understanding and interpretation of what's going on.

A close friend of mine is his student. She really enjoys studying with him.

I think this is a large part of why Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche doesn't require, or even accept, samaya vows from students. He expects nothing and offers everything, the whole potato - for free. He asks nothing from students other than they respect the teachings, respect each other, and show up. It's on us as individuals to do the work and take full responsibility. Karma certainly does decide who gets it, who doesn't, who gets hurt...

Absolutely not, we agree completely on this point. In my opinion, the lama needs to be able to recognize if the student is in a place where it is safe to introduce them to such intense practices. In the case we're discussing, the lama took the opportunity to sexually, emotionally, psychologically, and physically abuse such people. The lama may certainly agree to guide them on the spiritual path but needs to be grounded enough in the Dharma and in common sense to help the practitioner choose the right spiritual path and get appropriate medical or psych support at the same time. We're precisely on the same page. In my mind, all of that is ultimately the responsibility of both the lama and the practitioner.

Thank you for that. It’s beautiful to hear the site and members have helped someone, even to a limited degree, through such a dark period. That alone will help others who may come through, I’m certain of it. Even in our pain and desperation we can be a light to guide others, even just a bit. Sometimes that’s all it takes. And that’s a powerful blessing. While we may at times feel totally hopeless, it’s just a story we tell ourselves, no matter how dark. That’s precisely what I’ve been practicing intensely with for the past week. I spent the week in a retreat combining meditation practice with something akin to group therapy - small groups sharing our experiences. And as we opened more through practice, some deep dark shit was exposed. The emotional and psychological content that came up for many people was intense. And to be there to support each other was deeply moving. It both rattled other participants but also helped put things in perspective and offered guidance, hope, and support for each other. I’d never been in group therapy before but I found this profoundly effective, especially among dedicated practitioners. Anyway, your courage in coming here and sharing inspires me deeply. In the tradition I follow, we learn to connect with what is referred to as an inner refuge. When we can connect with that space we find it is bigger than the biggest problems we can ever bring to it, even our own death. In that openness is light and love. And we find that there is no greater purpose than simply our very being and our potential for connecting with others on the path. I for one think this life, even in its darkest moments is worth the candle. Warmest wishes to you. If you ever want to connect, I’m here to listen. PM me anytime if you feel so moved. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

Well said Apech. An important point I’d like to emphasize is that while people must take personal responsibility, many who come to Dharma do so out of desperation. I see this all the time. Victims of abuse and trauma, in particular, need loving and skillful support and, to my mind, that is a part of the role of the lama or those she might delegate to. While the responsibility of the student is to investigate the lama before applying to be their student, the responsibility of the lama is at least as great in deciding if they will accept the burden of holding that being’s Dharma fate in their hands.

I’ll respectfully suggest that attention is bought, sold, and cajoled daily in America. It is the lifeblood of advertisement and social media, two things that occupy an enormous portion of American attention. As for presence, there is little of that among most Americans, it is occupied with the three poisons most of the time.

Some rhetorical questions came up for me when reading this. To add context, I just returned from a week long retreat where most of us opened ourselves in such a way that brought up powerful emotional energy, so your words really touch a nerve. Don’t all practitioners work on surrendering the ego? Is that not a big part of ngöndro? Why else do we prostrate? Does the lama bear any responsibility for a misunderstanding of mogu? Where else are practitioners to gain a better understanding than from their teacher? Can we expect victims of trauma who are unfamiliar with Tibetan Buddhist culture and customs to be able to navigate the labyrinth of a sexual predator in a position of spiritual authority? I know how I feel towards my teacher. That deep connection, even in the presence of clear understanding, is ripe for exploitation. All the more so with a fragile and vulnerable student. And we all become quite vulnerable at times during the process if we are doing the work and digging deeply enough to really transform, none more than victims of trauma. I saw this vividly all week. In a general sense, I suspect tantric practice does not translate well into modern, Western culture. I don’t imagine it was your intent, but your post gave me a sense of victim-blaming. Perhaps it is simply my projection.

May I ask, do you think the input you received here helped you get through the darkness?

Are you interested only in the chemical and anatomic pathways?

I think that there is no inherent problem with combining Qigong and meditation from another system, provided you know what each system and practice entails, their view of things, how it affects you, what the objectives are, and what your expectations are. In most cases, I suspect we engage in a practice for a bit, have expectations that are unmet, and jump to another. This goes on and on and then we conclude that the practices don't work when we simply have never done them justice. I would suggest you pick a practice to which you feel a connection and stick with it long enough to see what it's doing for you and whether there is truly a need for anything else in your own experience, not based on observing others. Your experience is not theirs, your experience will be unique to your proclivities and karma. For most people, seeing physical, emotional, and energetic changes takes time - months or years. Also best to receive the most credible and authoritative instruction and guidance in the practice possible. Whether qigong, neigong, meditation,... these are all practices that require precision and commitment to bear fruit. In general, energetic practices like Qigong are highly compatible with meditative practice. In my tradition, every meditation session is preceded by exercises that use the breath, attention, and body movement to clear obstacles to a deeper inner connection and stability. I can't specifically speak to Kriya Yoga as I've never practiced it. Regarding Qigong, I would suggest you look at practices that are designed to clear blockages and restore balance (eg Eight Brocades), as these will support the meditative experience. Qigong and Neigong that is designed to concentrate and build or focus energy (eg martial forms like Shiba Luohangong), are more likely to be disruptive of the meditative process and are probably more likely to have a negative interaction when mixing with other systems. That's my general impression. At the end of the day you need to be a responsible consumer. You need to do your research, find quality instruction, and be the best student you can be. Results are not guaranteed on this path. I would also advise a bit of caution when taking advice from a group of anonymous folks hanging out online. Some speak from solid experience and knowledge, others are a bit wacky and could steer you wrong. Best of luck to you!

Cool

Interesting history. I'm surprised how tall some of the "pillows" were. Doesn't seem very good for the neck.

This is simply an attempt at deflection. It may be working for you but most of us see through it, I suspect. I do not consider asking for evidence a problem. It's quite clear that multiple people are, or have been, highly reactive to you and your "group" over the years. They consistently state that it is not your system, it is reactivity to your presentation and communication which at times have had those characteristics in the past. I think the invective has softened over the years but it's obviously still enough to cause reactivity in some. You can use the reactivity you experience as feedback that can help refine your communication and presentation skills, or you can simply pretend everyone else is wrong and ignore it. Your choice. And you