doc benway

That's a 7 year old link... Zhan zhuang is very powerful but there are no short cuts. If you practice skillful standing, many things will arise including spontaneous movement. The key is to fully engage with the standing and connecting mind and body. If we get focused on waiting for things to happen, nothing will happen but disappointment. It may takes years of practice for deeper experiences to occur.

Prostrations are generally considered to be working at the levels of body, speech, and mind simultaneously. The theory is that we prostrate in order to tame the ego, to put it in its proper place. Generally speaking, "ego" is the source of all of our problems because we over-identify with it - we take it to be who we are. That is fundamental ignorance, that is what we are looking to transcend, to see for what it really is. I think each tradition would say that its approach is preferable and efficacious. Don't overthink it, just find a method and start practicing. You may eventually want to connect with a live teacher or sangha, then you can easily adapt. There are 3 aspects - 1 Body - the physical action 2 Speech - the recitation, most traditions practice some sort of refuge prayer during prostration but any sort of supportive and pure expression of devotion, gratitude, requesting blessings, or mantra is fine. 3 Mind - it is easy for the mind to wander as we prostrate, even during a recitation or mantra. The mind must also be open, connected, alert, undistracted and fully engaged. Most traditions, I suspect, also incorporate a visualization during the practice that helps to engage the mind. Bottom line, if you can perform prostrations with no distraction, fully engaged, fully connected to the present moment, nothing else is really needed. If you are interested in a description of the visualization in the tradition I follow, let me know and I'll share but I don't have the time right now. Good luck in your practice! _/\_

Hi Yinja, I'm not a guru and not interested in being a guide but I'll offer a few observations, FWTW. I was emotionally locked down for a good part of my adult life and have opened up to a far richer and deeper emotional and spiritual life. What you are going through is a transition and temporary. And it's worth it. It is a good idea to find a guru if you are feeling the need of support. You may be able to find that in an anonymous forum like this one but better yet to find a credible master you can connect with in person, IMO. The fear you feel of others' judgement is a normal consequence of a lifetime of conditioning. We are programmed from early childhood to be addicted to approval - parents, teachers, friends, lovers - everyone we meet. All those whose opinions you fear are equally addicted and programmed. Those very judgements you fear are nothing more than an expression of fears, desires, expectations... It's all completely empty, that's what you are realizing - you just need to take the next step. You are seeing through your own masque, now see how all of those opinions and judgements you fear are equally transparent. It's all a dance. Acknowledge the negative and positive qualities you find in yourself, just as you see them in others. They are simply the way things are, nothing more and nothing less. Don't judge, just be aware and let it be. They are a product of years, decades, and generations of conditions and conditioning. The awareness alone will lead to spontaneous change, to growth. Next, see if you can find a little bit of openness in your heart to just let all of it be as it is. Is it possible to accept yourself, as you are? Look at yourself as a friend who needs your help, your support, your love. Could you accept a close friend, even with the faults you find in yourself? Show yourself some kindness, some patience, and be proud of yourself for every little step you take on this path. You deserve that much. One teacher who speaks beautifully to these themes for me is Anthony Demello. Check out his book Awareness. Better yet, listen to his live teachings in the set of CD's called Wake Up to Life! Here's the first part - Good luck on your journey! _/\_

I think focusing solely on Lao Tzu's words is an example of being dogmatic and adhering to a school of thought. Lao Tzu does not define Daoism for me. For me, being a Daoist is related to engaging in Daoist practices more than it is adhering to Lao Tzu's words, or any words for that matter. That said, the results of engaging in the practices brings us to a place where Lao Tzu's words, and those of the other masters, make sense and are expressed in our lives. When we come to these words through practice based realization it is far more meaningful than through words. One way to look at it is that indulging pleasure, and avoiding displeasure, are not supportive of dedicated practice. This is why serious practitioners would routinely isolate themselves. Eventually it is important to integrate the results of such practice with worldy life but in the beginning we do not have the skill or stability. Furthermore indulging oneself, whether positive or negative, reinforces the sense of self that is dismantled by meditative practices and replaced by a far greater and more fundamental sense of self. A lot of self proclaimed Daoists tend to be self-indulgent. I think this is mostly related to the fact that they are scholars rather than practitioners - two very different types of Daoist. Sorry if anyone is offended by these comments.

pollution

I was with you up until this statement. While this is a part of liberation, it is not the entirety of it in my view.

Halfway through the first book and find it compelling and thoroughly enjoyable.The characters are wonderful, the tension is building, it's easy to read, and I can't yet tell where it's headed although I have some suspicions. Thanks for the recommendation!

If the feeling has been with you your "whole life," it may have little to do with spirituality. I think there are different ways to approach the issue and very specific advice would require having a much better understanding of who you are, what you practice, your life circumstances, and so forth. That said, one thing that can be extremely supportive if you are currently engaged in spiritual practice is to connect with like-minded people. Find a local sangha or practice group, for example. it is important to make real connections. Internet connections are not the same. We need eye contact, physical contact, shared experience, shared interests. We need to be able to hug someone, cry and laugh with them. My teacher always tries to emphasize the value of coming together and simply sharing presence and experience. This is far more important than any exchange of information in his view (and mine). A very important part of being human is connecting with others in a meaningful way. Our high tech society has isolated and estranged us from this sort of contact and I think it is quite toxic.

Your point is valid and acknowledged but I disagree with what John states in the quotation. He begins by saying "Being a good spiritual practitioner can become what I call ..." What he subsequently goes on to describe is not the consequence of being a good spiritual practitioner but rather being a misguided practitioner. Being a good practitioner, having a good teacher, and following a credible path should result in real world integration and positive changes in our lives. Otherwise, something is lacking and we need to redirect ourselves.

I often see people question or criticize Buddhist practice and fruition as being too detached, implying a dullness, unresponsiveness, disconnectedness... Nothing could be further from the truth. Thank you for sharing this wonderfully concise yet comprehensive passage! What more is needed?

Losar Tashi Delek everyone!

Liberation requires that we deal with each and every condition in our lives in some way and release whatever relationship we have with it, whether positive or negative. In that sense, all human experience can (and must) be taken as the path. Of course, the closer to the root we are able to cut, the less we will have to deal with specific conditions. Nevertheless, these are the things we have to work with. At least, that's how I am working on myself. I acknowledge that it's not the only way or necessarily the correct way. Just what I've been taught and find is working for me.

While it's nice to talk about dropping the doer permanently, few of us are close to that. Mindfulness is the indispensible tool of the practitioner to return and continue.

Anything can be the path... hatred, sex, drugs... Ultimately, everything has to be the path.

Such an important point. Every interaction is a remote interaction. We interact with our interpretation and projection of the other, not who they are. We interact with who we are, not who they are. This happens whether face to face, remotely, in all relationship. So we can do remote energy practice and think about its efficacy, its benefits and risks,... but what a wasted opportunity if we don't bring that intention, that level of interest, that complete awareness to our every word, thought, and action here and everywhere in our lives.

Who could deny this?

Being in the movement is dualistic, being the movement is nondual. Rigpa is also referred to as nondual awareness by Rinpoche above, therefore it is not a characteristic of dual states such as "being in that movement." Yes, everything is energy. In it's native state, undifferentiated. It is in part our unique sensory apparatus and conditioning that elicits form from formless. Thodgal practice is one way to see this. This is one reason why I discourage myself and others from focusing too much on rigpa as that is simply one characteristic of our primordial state. In the dzogchen teachings, that state is described as having three characteristics - space, awareness, and warmth (or emptiness, clarity, and bliss). The first characteristic is the empty and boundless aspect, the second is rigpa, and the third is the tsal or dynamism - the flows you refer to. When you are that, it is what is referred to as nondual in the dzogchen teachings. This is one thing the zhine practice teaches as introduction and stabilization of the nature of mind. Again, I think you are reifying rigpa. It is simply a description of the self aware aspect of the natural state. At least that is what the dzogchen teachings seem to be saying to me. It is easy to try to grasp it. Better to let go, at least for me. Yes, when referring to realizing emptiness, realizing the self aware nature of the natural state, realizing the nondual nature of "who we are" and the flow of the internal and external winds, we rest more and more deeply into openness, we distinguish the mind from its nature. We rest into the nature by releasing or dis-identifying with mind. I'm a little resistant to getting into this sort of analytical discussion as it engages and turns on the mind and tends to take me further from the nature. Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your descriptions of your experience and interpretations. I think it can be helpful to compare notes to some degree as long as we don't get too focused on "understanding."

From my perspective rigpa is not "resting in movement , in that clarity." Rigpa is self knowing, the opposite of ma rigpa - ignorance. What is the self that is known (realized)? That is the basis. Rigpa may be present (or absent) at rest, in movement, and in arising or manifestation. There are base and path rigpa, the primordial self-knowing of the basis and the personal experience of self-knowing of the practitioner. One is a manifestation of the other but they are not equivalent. Using phrases like 'resting in rigpa' tends to lead some to reify it as a state of consciousness, something to do or be. I think that is misleading. You speak of resting in movement as rigpa and becoming that movement as something else. I look at it a bit differently. Resting in the movement means the one who is resting is inactive, unidentified with, and eventually dissolves. The observer and observed are not differentiated, perhaps that is what you mean by "becoming"? This is the beginning of self-recognition - rigpa. Rinpoche's discussion above appears to be focusing on zhiné (Shine). Many of the insights he describes are developed as a result of zhiné practice. I personally don't doubt Rinpoche's knowledge or understanding of rigpa but you are welcome to, of course. I think he is a reliable resource based on his training and experience although I've never studied with him. I question my own understanding first, knowing that my understanding is imperfect, and work patiently towards a deeper realization. There is nothing beyond rigpa in these teachings, it is a characteristic of the basis. The fundamental premise of dzogchen is that there is no becoming, we already are from the beginning. We simply need to recognize and realize, settle into what we already are. It is done without any effort whatsoever. Any effort, any becoming, takes us further away. While confidence can be a virtue, it can also be an impediment. I'd suggest you be open to the possibility that your understanding is imperfect. I freely admit that I don't understand the teachings to the degree I would like. Dzogchen teachings seem very accessible because they are so simple and yet there is a precision and subtlety that is very elusive and dependent on direct transmission from a master and dedicated practice. There is a saying that we need to HEAR the teachings (implying direct transmission which I think is absolutely critical), then we need to reflect deeply on what we've heard, then we need to actualize those teachings in our lives.

Serenity Ridge Retreat Center in Nelson County, Virginia. My spiritual home.

duplicate post... browser a little strange lately

Nothing to forgive and no hard feelings. It's the mind's nature (as opposed to the Nature of Mind) to judge, measure, and compare; to define and understand. I didn't take it as negative but just as it is and, to be frank, I expected it but don't want to engage in that too much. I just don't find it very helpful at this point. Mind is forever in the realm of mind. It is not the Nature and will never truly know the Nature. When it drops away, the clarity aspect of the Nature knows itself - that is Rigpa. Mind is, however, a dynamic display of the energy, the tsal. Whatever you think the Nature is, whatever we collectively conclude that it is, it's not that. We can read a million descriptions by the greatest masters and think we know. Sitting for a few minutes in skillful practice will teach us more about it than all the books on Earth. We can understand it perfectly and never taste it. I wrote that little poem to try and share a bit of how it tastes to me, not to define it. Thank you very much for the kind words, I really appreciate that. I also enjoy your presence here and your contributions.

bloated

I'd prefer to leave my little poem as it is. I feel like I am now being tested and examined, measured and graded. That was not the objective of sharing. Trying to anticipate what you are looking for, trying to describe experience in more detail, adding more words... Trying to describe the natural state with words... I'll pass. I will say that yes, the empty nature does include the body. My ability to rest in the nature of mind as I go through the day and in dreams is something that I currently work with and is coming along slowly but surely. In our tradition, we look at it from the perspective of body, speech, and mind. All three are integrated into the natural state in waking, dream, deep sleep, and at the time of death. My intention was not to describe my true nature but simply share personal meditative experience. I do so rarely and prefer not to have it dissected or graded. No question I am at a stage along the path, nothing more and nothing less. And no, I'm not a realized guru. We can describe our experience but not our true nature, IMO. I can describe the flavor of a mango to you - it's tart, sour, sweet, funky, creamy, there's a bit of umame. If you've never tasted a mango it might sound just like spoiled milk or lemonade but you still won't know the flavor of a mango. A menu doesn't satisfy hunger and the letters w-a-t-e-r don't slake thirst. I'm not much into trying to intellectually understand these things. I'm more interested in seeing how they improve the quality of my life and those around me. Beyond practice, I find relatively little value in thinking or talking about it. I'd much rather discuss the impact it's having on our lives and how it can be beneficial. The words and concepts for me are more a distraction than an aid with a few exceptions as noted in my earlier post.

Thanks for the reply. How best to describe the indescribable? Many great masters have tried and do a far better job than I ever could. I particularly like the indirect pointing we find in the advice of the Bönpo Masters of the Zhangzhung Nyengyud, Longchenpa, Chan and Zen poetry, that of Shabkar, Milarepa, and Rumi! Direct descriptions can sound trite and recycled. The words are far too cheap and small. Nevertheless, I'll share some personal impressions for what they're worth. Sitting and resting, I watch thoughts come. I notice the body, the emotions, the senses... Not following, not refusing... allowing and opening; they soon loosen and depart. I rest in the spaciousness, stillness, and silence that remains. Luminous, immediate, and vivid, yet utterly clear and transparent. Resting deeper and looking back at the one who is resting, "I" loosens and falls away like a silk robe. Form is there, I let go... I am not that. And yet I am not other than that... I rest deeper. Thought is there, I continue to let go. I rest deeper, wider, fully open. Identification loosens further and floats away like fine mist before a strong breeze. Looking back at the one who is looking, no one is there. What is left is timeless, unborn and undying, pervasive, perfect, and instantly present. Complete and yet empty of all identification and substance. The body can move, clear presence is undisturbed. The voice speaks yet silence is there. Thoughts and emotions come, abide, and depart - nothing there to hold them. Like painting figures in air, the sky is untouched. Clear presence aware of its empty nature remains.

In keeping with the Hanuman theme, here's a concert poster I recently picked up..