Hello guys. I'm new to the forums but I have been trying to learn more about the Tao through this forum and other websites alongside the books for a while now. The thing that finally got me to join this forum is a conflict I am having within myself and I don't know how I should handle it. I'm deeply conflicted.
I try to be nice to everyone I meet. Even those who I feel are reckless and dangerous I treat with respect because I know that I am no better than them because I have plenty of flaws myself. To have such an ego will lead to my downfall.
There is one person though whom I treat with constant disrespect. The reason being is that I feel she is simply too stupid and immature for her age. I used to give her the benefit of the doubt and treat her as an equal like everyone else but the seemingly endless hole of stupidity she has has actually begun to anger me. It has gotten to the point that I just see her as a joke.
Eventually I just stopped giving her the benefit of the doubt and just called her out on the stupid. Some of the stupid things she has done is forcing me to pay for her to see a movie (long story but she basically told me she didn't have any money until after I couldn't back out, mind you I'm the one in a worse money situation than she is), and not knowing how to spell our president's name even though she voted for him.
The part about her not knowing how to spell Barack Obama's name happened today and I flat out told her that this was pathetic. It just annoyed me to no end that a 24 year old could not even know how to spell the American president's name.
This is just a few of the many stupid things she has done.
So I'm really conflicted on how I should handle the situation. Part of me feels bad for telling her that she was pathetic and that I totally mishandled the situation. The thing is that I feel like I should be honest with everybody of my opinion. I feel like everybody just accepts her as being stupid and nobody actually tells her how stupid she sounds. I've seen plenty of situations where "friends" have let their friends practice unsafe habits and yet when someone comes along and is concerned, they are belittled and told to stop being the preacher of the group. Usually I'm not so blunt as I was today with her but I must say I don't think I've ever met anyone so stupid.
I've learned from the Tao that everything serves one purpose or another (no matter how useless it seems) and that it should not be regarded any different than anything else. I've also learned from reading the Hua Hu Ching that you'll encounter people who are reckless and that you'll have to just let them be.
So I'm really conflicted. Should I just let this girl be or try to nudge her somewhat so she can better herself? I've really tried (such as engage her in intelligent conversation which always ends miserably or get her to get back into community college rather than waste her money on a fancy car she can't afford) but it seems she doesn't mind being reckless and traveling a path (I feel) will make her unhappy. At the rate she is going she will be working the same dead end job for the rest of her life because she isn't aware of anything and I know that isn't what she wants. She wants to travel and see Japan for one thing but at this rate it will never happen.
So how should I handle this situation?
