forestofclarity

Your post is absolutely heartbreaking. I was going to write that sometimes people feel like they are visited in dream or a vision, so yes, I would think this is it. Sometimes it is just a sort of release in the heart. Please remember to have compassion for yourself as well. Much metta to you in this painful time. I would add that in addition to any practice, it is always ok to seek out grief therapy or other help as needed.

I don't think you have to do anything with it. Intentionally trying to guide or direct the energy is generally conducted by the ego-habits or acquired mind and will probably just distort it or give false ideas about what should happen in my opinion. Others may disagree. There is a time for effort, and a time for effortlessness. I share when I think it is appropriate. Most of my practice is Buddhist based.

A flaming swastika rotating counterclockwise in your abdomen. These are usually produced by a series of intentional techniques and/or visualizations, for example. An intense blast of energy spontaneously rising up your spine and shooting out of the top of your head followed by a non-dual experience.

Harder than most of us realize, I would wager. Conditioning runs very deep, impacting how we see, feel, sense, think, etc. As far as imagination, I'm surprised at how things unfold for people across traditions, and in people who have no knowledge about subtle bodies, qi, kundalini, etc. It seems to me to follow a pattern. Which makes sense, because the mind is the mind and reality is reality. What I am suspicious of are reports that are not universal. The more specific something is, the more likely in my view that it is individual and not based on a universal process.

Om Mani Padme Hung and chanting the name of Amitabha/ Amitofo are practices you can do without empowerment. Dedicate the merit to the departed.

I would think it would get simpler as it gets more refined. Complexity seems to be plunging into the 10,000 things.

The Book of Balance and Harmony, trans Cleary: See also the Taiyi Jinhua Zongzhi, aka in English, the Secret of the Golden Flower which is full of such references.

From Liu Yiming's Commentary on Wang Mu's Awakening to Reality: trans Pregadio: trans Cleary: This should sound familiar to Zen/Chan students.

No, my error. I cloned the wrong thing, sorry! Still adjusting to mod tech. Should be good now.

Same in Western alchemy, except in the West, external alchemy was focused on transform base metals into gold rather than immortality. The process was to revert matter into its primordial form, or hyle, and then form this in the philosophers stone. In internal alchemy, the primordial form is the union of male/female, or the hermaphrodite in some traditions. Of course, the West tends to be more externally focused, so this would make sense. IMO, these are not two different things from an inner point of view. IIRC, gold was considered to be an eternal metal, and the metal closest to God/heaven (it's been a while since I studied Western alchemy). So transmuting oneself from a base being to a divine one is essentially turning lead into gold.

Should be good to go. Let me know if there are issues.

It is interesting that the character dan also refers to the color red, which in Western alchemy is the earthward manifesting (i.e. rubedo) of pure heavenly energies. Purity is generally represented by gold. I wonder if there is a different meaning depending on whether one is cultivating health, longevity, spiritual power, or realization.

Sorry for your loss. No. I think you're referring to the Bardo period in Tibetan Buddhism. I would suggest not suppressing your emotions. Allow yourself to grieve. When the time is right, you might find there is a inner, often heart centered release and you are able to request the person to move on. Sometimes there are rituals that can help this process of release. Typically, we are advised against speaking negatively about some one during this period.

A lot of people talk about neidan and dan tian but it is not clear to me by what people mean by dan, 丹. So what do you all mean? It seems that definitions vary widely and that people sort of talk past each other on this issue. It seems fairly important. A few sample definitions are provided at Golden Elixir: https://www.goldenelixir.com/terms/jindan.html Note: I didn't ask "which one path is right, and how is every other path wrong" nor "who is right and who is an ignoramus in these arts." I'm curious as to what the different paths say.

Mark Rasmus has some qi ball exercises that I've been playing with again. He initially starts "externally" to the body and then goes "internal." One thing that helps is developing a sort of relaxed, open awareness. I don't think you feel for qi so much as you just sort of open your awareness and the qi comes into view, so to speak (although this doesn’t mean intention is absent). His videos are kind of unstructured, but he supports a more playful method than others.