Son-Of-Niah

Hey - I'm posing a question to you regarding kundalini, ever since a Kali Ma statue (and a few other dark religious) that was starving me and I decided to take out of my house sought vengeance through mirror games, forced appetite, a food/choke mechanism and a seemingly metallic snake in my throat linked to the kali/baphomet energy, I haven't been abe to do a thing. It put four cursed sweets representing evil spirits in me involuntarily after I was recovering from an illness - they constantly switch, read all of my thoughts and choke me (some say its another aspect of me but thats BS as I have an assertive yet flexible mind state), I can't even CRY and it utterly DRAINS all of my energy and as I was bullied as a child it makes it even worse as every single thought is read and it seeks to mutilate my ego (rapping helps to confuse it) - naturally around people I may come across as awkward at first then relaxed but this thing probes me. It makes me feed it but little nutrition meets my body - I've experimented with all dietary philosophies, seen gurus, doctors dont know what im talking about - I can't even BREATH (metal comes up to chest so no stomach breath), SMELL, and it SHRINKS me SKULL and TEETH like im on a drug of some sort - mostly because im easy prey. I can't sleep - I almost just pass out from exhaustion and my arms, legs, body temperature and body rhythms are probed. I can talk to it but it just psychologically talks to me - it's jealous of my intelligence and pure heart and also masculinity so it effeminzes my body, voice depth and drains liquids and foods seemingly on a whim, sort of turning them into some malignant alcohol/drug. My bowel is constantly moving and in a state of shock then it blames my recovering body and seeks to claim it as its.It has narrowed my mouth/appetite to a crescent, opened my energy body in a totally evil way - my mouth now slopes downwards so I can barely taste or chew food without force. Please help.

Hey everybody, A while ago I posted here about the various health problems I'd been having since an early teen - severe digestive problems and weight loss, a feeling that my body was somehow rejecting food, etc. A copy of that post is below. I believe I've began what many call this Kundalini Awakening since November of last year. My health has been poor, well non-existent really, since my mid-teen years after a series of highly traumatic childhood incidents and since then spirituality and metaphysics has always been my main focus. But last winter it got really crazy. A couple of drug-experiences (prescribed ones being the worst, naturally) combined with a complete system-malfunctioning of my whole body lead to symptoms such as the following, which stay with me to this day; - Bizarre visions often involving my third eye, many would call these "hallucinations" but they seem to me to be experiences in some lower-dimensions of reality. Often extremely disturbing in nature, death like. - Extreme sensitivity to noise, light and the energies of other people, especially family members in my house. - Severe weight loss, almost impossible to digest most foods, periods of extremely low sugar levels (eating something sugary often kicks me back to reality spectacularly, for a while) - Involuntary movement of my legs as well as other body parts (which links to one of the visions I had in the early stages in which I was floating along the floor in some demented fashion) - Periods of trippiness, profound insights into the nature of reality, seeing more colour in everything, prophetic dreams, a feeling as though time is flying by realllly quickly - If I don't ejaculate after about 2 days the craziness gets way worse until I do so, which is way annoying as I used to be able to go without weeks comfortably. All of my dreams seem to be visitations to another dimension which is sort of like this one but distorted, can get really mind-f'ing unless I ejaculate. A lot of false awakenings, layers of reality, and what alomst at times seems like a voice which isn't of my mind influencing my thoughts before sleep (Note: I usually sleep in the mornings). Visions of myself in differing physical forms in front of mirrors, i.e female. - Shallow, difficult breaths, feeling "flushed" all of the time, testosterone "surges" and crashes (indicated by my voice), incessant de ja vus, a strange feeling in my right eye which clears up after I ejaculate, an internal coldness, sensitivity around my nipple area/s, sensing a strange, possibly snake-like entity almost constantly. Feeling like I've died and this is an afterlife. -Excess mucus production and a constant nagging pain, almost a narrowing in my chest. Etc. Sounds like all the makings of a mad-man, but that really isn't me at all. As you can see most of these are unfortunately negative. A couple of theories I have floating around in my head at the moment: I've seen two spiritual guru-types who've both said I've been cursed by a family member and need to puke up, and another theory is that it's all to do with my diet - I may be allergic to gluten, overly sensitive to refined sugar, and a bunch of other stuff (I tried a bunch of diets in my teens with mixed results, an anti-candida type one for the most part as well as raw etc. ATM my diet isn't that great). It's probably a combination of all of these things really. Also my house is said to be possessed and around the time I moved in it I began having problems. Any thoughts on that lot, lol?! Thanks. Thankfully, well it seemed at the time, a couple of months ago I looked well on my way to having cured my ills. After a series of events involving suspicious doctors, meddling family members and spontaneous events whereby it seemed as though things were happening to or for me without me having much conscious choice in the matter/s. It culminated in me nearly choking on some dodgy sugar-based medication whilst having some bizarre vision of some babylon/one world/2012 situation, since then I've had dreams or serpents, egypt, strange rooms with sinister doctors, scientists, universities, test labs, more strange deranged figures in my house, and other such "nonsense". I used to take Senna for constipation regularly, then I found Cascara Sagrada and my body began to digest food differently - peristalsis returned, a feeling I hadn't felt since childhood. Now my body hates all laxatives but the MUCUS that it used to cough up is now used as an AID to digest food, possibly due to the introduction of the bile-stimulating Cascara. However, If I DON'T eat very regularly then the MUCUS that's being used as an aid begins to cough itself up, leading to various morbid sensations of my life force sucking away as well as me choking on the mucus itself, at that point I have to EAT to re-"stimulated" the mucus and form more, well crap basically. When my body was clearer, although I was underweight my mind was MUCH clearer. Now I feel a constant mental slowness and strain. My body digests food in a slow, SNAKE like manner. Something comes up to my throat and annoys me till I eat, then goes back down. It seems distinctly feminine. Here's the really weird bit - since last week something I first thought to be divine occured. I was eating some vegetarian food and the food felt lighter in my hand, made my whole body feel light and numb with no gas down any of the subtle passage ways. I had loads of energy, a seeming increase in arm strength as well as size, and my voice was much clearer and I felt more confident. I took this to be a sign that Animal Products were the cause of my vibratory ills, so the next few meals I had were vegetarian and the same thing happned to varying degrees - I told nobody about this but my mother, whom my relationship with is mixed. However, after a few days the thing seemed to turn on me - benign lentil curry or wholemeal bread would at first APPEAR to be accepted, then after a few bites the wonderful numb feeling would give way to the food deforming in my hands/the bowl, smelling rotten and being trapped at the roof of my mouth as if to say "Don't you dare!". So I tried some less than healthy foods, even non-vegan foods and some of those were accepted, but it's all random so I have to have loads of food in the house - it's like someone or THING has TAKEN OVER my throat and digestive system. Being the paranoid soul that I am my suspicions have ranged from the doctors inserting some chip (?) in me during an endoscopy or some medication, my mother drugging me, some demonic force in my house or even one of the Hindu entities/Kali MA playing games with me. The channels in my digestive system represent left-upper and lower, right-upper and lower, through the centre - various foods/tastes are needed to stimulate various centres needed for pushing the crap through the system. At various times I've nearly CHOKED on the crap I'm forced to consume - as opposed to before when I COULDN'T consume anything, and I appeared to be "saved" by a snake piledriving up my throat in the motion of a male-orgasm, thus waking me. I have very sensitive Blood-sugar levels so if I eat animal proteins or grains or refined sugars excessively I may go into a coma, or so it seems (?) When my system is provoked, either by too much, little or the wrong food, my breathing is severely restricted. Then, the "right" food may re-stimulate it temporarily, or cleansing my bowels etc. Worth stating at this point that my sex drive and potency has increased notably, probably from the testosterone in the foods. All of family have always been concerned about me and wanted me to EAT - I notice my energies playing off them in weird ways, my mother especially. Although the idea of an inbuilt dietician/purity detector from the Gods sounds alluring, I'd easily give it up to actually be able to FEEL my stomach and throat again, everything just seems NUMB, maybe from all the mucus working very orderly in some strange system representing the thing I so detested before when I was into fruitarianism and the whatnot, now my body DETESTS fruit, greens, even water. It just wants warm, cooked foods but what IT wants at WHAT time it wants. Just before this started I was talking to a self-righteous, narrow-minded uber-conventional therapist/GP who my local GP beckoned me to see- he ensured me that all food was digested in exactly the same way and passes down the system neutrally whilst I argued that different elements had different natures. He seemed very much like O'brien from Big Brother, sly as though keeping something under wraps, and wanted me to stay in their hospital for a few weeks. I set out to test his theory, nearly killing my self but getting through in the end. Then accepting his theory seemed alluring, a world of freedom and no restrictions, etc. Now my body has turned psycho on my ass, or something is making it(?) I know this post is long and some of you may think I sound like a complete nutcase - I'd probably think the same thing had I not the first hand experience. Thank you and help!!!

You don't want to be on laxatives for any extended period of time. Laxative abuse can lead to dehydration, mineral imbalances, laxative dependency, and even internal organ damage. ...Hence why I said I don't take them any more. and get a referral to counselor who understands the spiritual side of things and isn't so entrenched in Western Meds. . . . That's a preposterously hard thing to do, bordering on impossible, where I live anyhow. I've been referred to many counselors, therapists, "nutrition-based therapists", digestive specialists etc - all of them extremely narrow minded with little knowledge regarding subtle body/mind mechanics or things outside of their comfort zones/textbooks. triphala is another purgative, too strong unless prescribed by an herbalist who understands your condition. If you must use laxatives ask your herbalist about Huo ma ren (hemp or cannabis seed), it's very gently, good for chronic constipation, and nourishes yin. Virtually everything I've read about Triphala indicates it's very gentle - like a restorative tonic with nutritious and mild laxative properties. (?) Waste of money there then. As I say - I've already made appointments with TCM/Ayurveda doctors which are due shortly, but as I'm on this (and other) forum/s I might as well seek knowledge from other sources as well. Thank you for the tip on the hemp seed though, how would the preferred method be to take it?

pathogens in the gut in general unbalance PH. attempting to kill or balance yeast is impossible and always makes worse. Usually there is an underlying 'literally so, pathogen in the stomach that come from one or multiple food poisoning incident. Getting PH into a balanced state of fluctuation is the only way to really change. I say fluctuation because its easy to be one sided and think that acid is bad, so 'balanced flux' PH is the core and there are more ways to mess it up than to fix it. A big help is staying away from fermented food like milk, cheese, anything pickled and really anything with bacteria in it Cool, so the Rastas are clued on as well then. What bacteria-free foods would you recommend basing the diet on? I find whole grains hard to digest, my body hates fruit/veg ATM - fruit is provocative and veg is too fibrous/hard to break down. Maybe some aren't. I tried sweet potato and spinach recently - my rejected both. Currently fine oats with rice milk is my staple - would this be a bad meal, for example? Public water supply depending on where you live is recycled more than one time (here it's up to 8-12 time "ho hohoho" contains fecal matter and so pathogens. Lol - my body literally gags at the tap water in my house so I figured! depending on your body type, like say if you have fire, then alcohol is like jet fuel a little goes long way for relief and also seems to unbalance more too (too much fire burns up reserves. I'll write some more later about adrenal cortex fixes you father was a real hell raiser like with red horns? mine was, not a bad guy, just a bad life. As a child I had to witness a lot of arguing, some domestic abuse and other things I'd rather not go into. My father has a good heart but has always been a drinker, being of Punjabi heritage that's a common thing. But he has his demons too. When I used to drink people would say I'd act like I was demented - now a lot of my dreams involve me or other people in intoxicated states, I've only drank alcohol once in the past two years so it's probably my subconscious alluding to the intoxicating effects of some of the foods I'm still consuming, sugar is obvious but bread seems to be far more sinister, to me anyhow. My short-term memory can go out of the window after a bread based meal. Being psychically wide open and without the real power of voice makes us kind of like a landing strip for all the crazy energy in everyone (almost) else. Communication is how a very intuitive person fixes them selves so don't deny your perhaps a little hidden god given autonomous human being abilities, there are many. Yeah, as a child I used to observe everything and everyone - my parents, children in the playground. My secondary school was quite violent and I was an easy target so I had to always be on the look out, though at the time I was far larger than most of the children so most of the abuse was verbal. I was and to a degree probably still am, constantly on fight-or-flight. Now I find my ability to project my voice is severely affected by the state of my chest/system/what I've just eaten. but also, I can kick the latter into gear by exercising the former, either by talking to other people or freestyle-rapping to myself, something I'm good at and that exercises my brain's different hemispheres. Really, the state of my digestive system IS my voice at the moment. Thank you for the other information as well, I'll use it to the best of my ability.

Thank you for your replies, I have made appointments with both TCM and Ayurveda practitioners and intend to see both soon. @Torus - very deep and appropriate. Originally at the age of 13 I attributed my symptoms to Candida but after a couple of years the whole meat/veg thing wasn't quite working, although I was in far better health, so I tried the raw/fruit based diet for a while, then periodically under eating. regarding childhood traumas - my father was an alcoholic, something I briefly flirted with a few years back. I was severely bullied for a period during my youth - my voice has always felt restricted. I always sensed energies, entities maybe, some of them I recall tried grabbing me in my old house. And strange things on my body, like dormant time-bombs, it was a rash around my naval area that preluded the whole heap of other symptoms. I recall strange periods in hospitals, I was sick a lot, sometimes very severely I'm told. What I'm most worried about ATM is the control this thing has over my eating patterns - feel free to give me some dietary tips as well as things I could do when the mucus in my throat is threatening to choke me to death if I don't feed it with all the crap it likes, and even somewhat after that! I HATE THAT, sorry for being so blunt! It's like the food itself is alive and hates being detoxed of itself. I clued on to the whole snake/tail thing a while ago, and I would be interested in your ideas in the psycho/spiritual department as I've been noticing a hell of a lot of Law-Of-Attraction type coincidences lately, like at times things seem really easy and at certain times a force takes over me and makes my hands light during eating, combing my hair, makes me better than I was at football, aids my breathing for a while, but this dissipates when my need to eat arises beacuase of the mucus in my system, then I have to fight the food off. It's annoying because I feel a lot of potential. regarding hot tea, etc - I can stomach pretty much anything these days, believe me. And what is your take on the laxatives - the Senna was very thorough but left me underweight and emaciated after a while. Though, was it that? Cascara made my body think differently which is good, now I take nothing because the shake-up may be too much for my system atm. I've ordered some Triphala which is supposed to be good and gentle, any other recommendations re: herbs to aids digestion, etc?

Thank you for the advice - most of that I already follow but the acupunturist is definitely something I've been thinking about recently. There's certainly an issue with my "Chi", the strength I used to feel in my chest has completely withered away leaving me weak and vulnerable to all types of nonsense - physical or otherwise. ATM I couldn't really care less if it's Kundalini, demonic possession, or essentially something physical - I just want my body to be how it used to be. Peace, S.O.N.

I believe I've began what many call this Kundalini Awakening since November of last year. My health has been poor, well non-existent really, since my mid-teen years after a series of highly traumatic childhood incidents and since then spirituality and metaphysics has always been my main focus. But last winter it got really crazy. A couple of drug-experiences (prescribed ones being the worst, naturally) combined with a complete system-malfunctioning of my whole body lead to symptoms such as the following, which stay with me to this day; - Bizarre visions often involving my third eye, many would call these "hallucinations" but they seem to me to be experiences in some lower-dimensions of reality. Often extremely disturbing in nature, death like. - Extreme sensitivity to noise, light and the energies of other people, especially family members in my house. - Severe weight loss, almost impossible to digest most foods, periods of extremely low sugar levels (eating something sugary often kicks me back to reality spectacularly, for a while) - Involuntary movement of my legs as well as other body parts (which links to one of the visions I had in the early stages in which I was floating along the floor in some demented fashion) - Periods of trippiness, profound insights into the nature of reality, seeing more colour in everything, prophetic dreams, a feeling as though time is flying by realllly quickly - If I don't ejaculate after about 2 days the craziness gets way worse until I do so, which is way annoying as I used to be able to go without weeks comfortably. All of my dreams seem to be visitations to another dimension which is sort of like this one but distorted, can get really mind-f'ing unless I ejaculate. A lot of false awakenings, layers of reality, and what alomst at times seems like a voice which isn't of my mind influencing my thoughts before sleep (Note: I usually sleep in the mornings). Visions of myself in differing physical forms in front of mirrors, i.e female. - Shallow, difficult breaths, feeling "flushed" all of the time, testosterone "surges" and crashes (indicated by my voice), incessant de ja vus, a strange feeling in my right eye which clears up after I ejaculate, an internal coldness, sensitivity around my nipple area/s, sensing a strange, possibly snake-like entity almost constantly. Feeling like I've died and this is an afterlife. -Excess mucus production and a constant nagging pain, almost a narrowing in my chest. Etc. Sounds like all the makings of a mad-man, but that really isn't me at all. As you can see most of these are unfortunately negative. A couple of theories I have floating around in my head at the moment: I've seen two spiritual guru-types who've both said I've been cursed by a family member and need to puke up, and another theory is that it's all to do with my diet - I may be allergic to gluten, overly sensitive to refined sugar, and a bunch of other stuff (I tried a bunch of diets in my teens with mixed results, an anti-candida type one for the most part as well as raw etc. ATM my diet isn't that great). It's probably a combination of all of these things really. Also my house is said to be possessed and around the time I moved in it I began having problems. Any thoughts on that lot, lol?! Thanks.

Okami was a semi-slept-on classic which springs to mind, many aspects of Taoism and the like in that.

Hey, how y'all doing? The name's Aaron and here's a little bit about myself. I've been interested in all aspects of esotericism and metaphysics ever since my mid-teens, which isn't really that long ago. It all began with a personal crisis regarding my health and a series of really dark-energetic events, something I'm still really struggling with to this day. I'll expound more on the main forum and hopefully some of you aspiring metaphysical-masters can help me out a little, but until then, peace, look forward to exchanging ideas! Holla, S.O.N.