Ninpo-me-this-ninjutsu-me-that

If that ever happens like in the picture I'll be a monkeys uncle! The buildings would get built for sure, but not quite like that, you'd need double the amount otherwise it would be a real waste and someone would miss the chance of making some money on all that land instead of wasting it on trees and grass 'n stuff. And even if it did happen (which is unlikely due to someone skimming off the top) some enterprising young man would cut the trees down in order to sell the wood (after having bunged the man in charge a few quid to look the other way); and all that grass! Some little old ladies would come along and dig those patches of grass up right quick and put them elsewhere. That city would have more chances of looking like that in Beruit rather than China!

I'm not surprised you didn't! After doing all that I'd be exhausted! I think scones were your big mistake. Way too energy intensive and not sexy at all! Try these next time: Uncooked Chocolate Bars 60 grams butter or margarine 200 grams dark chocolate 3 tablespoons golden syrup 250 grams digestive biscuits, crushed Place butter, chocolate and syrup in a saucepan and heat gently until melted. Stir in the biscuits and mix thoroughly. Turn into a greased and lined shallow 18 cm square tin and smooth the top with a palette knife. Leave to set, then cut into bars. Makes 16.

Ya, groping definitely seems like a big Asian thing, although by no means exclusive to Asia. I think it's because most Asian females(in Asia)when encountering that will themselves feel ashamed, and not say a word. Such is 'culture'. I will say though that in the area of China where I am the females are a bit spicy. By that I mean a man wouldn't dare to do that for fear of getting an earful in front of everyone or a good kick (literally). I found those percentages surprising Enishi, apparently Chinese people are enjoying sex by o.o2% more than in my home country! I fancy that that extra 0.02% is due to me moving to China I really don't think those figures can be representative. You'd be hard pushed to get the majority of Chinese females to take a survey on sex, let alone to make a good judgement as to what constitutes 'satisfied'. If all your life you'd only eaten spongecake and never had any other other type of cake in your life, and you then took a survey 'are you satisfied with your cake?', you'd probably say you were very satisfied!

It says that uniforms are a fantastic addition to anyones sex life! I think cos-play is a fantastic invention. Chun li from street fighter....oooohhhhhh This girl practices Daoism on an almost daily basis!!! When cosplay goes bad

In general it's more an Asian thing, although work does have something to do with it. As far as I can make out it's part genetic, with many Asians not being as highly sexed as the other races. This is their view too usually. There is a rather nice side-effect to it though. Many Asian males and females can have real true friendship with each other even at a young age without any sexual pretext at all (remember the 'When Harry Met Sally' dialogue as to why men and women can never just be friends). I think I'm in love..... I think this is also part of the problem, a very big part. Many of the men seem to have little or no idea of what they are supposed to be doing...not to be rude...but really they don't. Japanese porn is bizarre at the best of times (so I've heard...I wouldn't really know )... I'm not sure technological gadgets really get a female going! My favorite all time line I've heard in China when the guys want to get intimate with a female is : "you should have sex with me, it's good for your health!" The really strange thing is it works for them!!!

Ahhh, Cookie Monster! One of my favorites, superseded in my view only by Oscar the Grouch, our very own Daoist hobo. I will say I was quite traumatized as a child when I noticed that none of the cookies cookie monster ate went down his throat! That's because you yourself know Kate that cauliflower cheese is always relevant, in absolutely any context. Global warming - cauliflower cheese. Arms to Iraq - cauliflower cheese. Theory of relativity - cauliflower cheese. I lost my keys - cauliflower cheese. The list goes on and on....

Thanks Cat, it does come and go, which is like my energy really (not so good at the conserving part)! :lol: ..... less of the mildly please.

Merry Christmas to all!!! And since we're on the topic, I'm cooking some lovely biscuits; shortbread base with a caramel filling and chocolate toping. Enlightenment in a biscuit, I think you'll agree.

My god this is a fast moving thread...it's like a page every 3 minutes! I've been trying to get to the end and ask Rainbow about the point on the base of the feet, and what it represents as I've been feeling a spinning motion in this area on both feet recently. I'm not sure Rainbow will get to see this question at this rate so if anyone can chime in then please do so. Thanks in advance.

I don't think it's 100% the case Gerard that if you consume alcohol you are inviting an entity. It simply means in that state the entity has more ability to tweak an unprocessed 'id'. Lots of dark stuff is already there, just societies conditioning keeps it down. If it's processed they have nothing to tweak on, so to speak. There has to be a handle there in the first place. Well there's her problem right there. Sleeping on the floor. I don't know why but entities really like to inhabit the floor, and when a human is on the floor they like to feed off them. I remember where I used to live years ago. I had been practicing opening my peripheral vision and one day I noticed something shadowy in the floor of the living room. At first I thought it was my imagination or some other effect of the light, but no matter where I positioned myself it was always there. It would also slightly move, but seemed to be somehow stuck. I tried to communicate with it and asked it to show if it was really there, and it waved at me! Anyway, not much was doing with it so I pretty much lost interest with it. I still have no idea what it was or what it was doing....or why it was seemingly stuck in the floor either.

No, that would be because they can't control their ejaculations and consider women to be used somewhat akin to cattle, and have little concern for the females sexual health...or pleasure for that matter.

Good point! But I was thinking more along the lines of a blessed fridge magnet, a magnet that also attracts wealth, health and stationary, all that good stuff.

And so you can! With 'beyond Buddhism -The Secret Level'! Buddha secretly merged all the major religions together in one kick ass system! Worship who you like! Jehova, Mo-humid, Jesus AND get this Lao Tzu AT THE SAME TIME! WHY DIDN'T HE TEACH THIS TO EVERYONE YOU ASK? WELL QUITE SIMPLY THIS SYSTEM IS DEVASTATING! It's like the religious version of Bruce Lees Jeet Kune Do, only better! With my system...sorry I mean Buddhas system... you will be able to: Turn the other cheek and smack 'em in the mouth should you choose (karma free) Get not 72 virgins upon death? NO, in Beyond Budhism you get 144!!! Be one of Gods chosen ones without doing a thing(CIRCUMCISION -FORGET ABOUT IT!)!!! All this and MUCH MUCH MORE!! Shit! And that's why we have 'Beyond Buddhism -The Secret Level VIP, the instructors course '. Tell me, how much would you pay for instant enlightenment and attaining the secret level? Also having a business where by people would be throwing alms at you daily? 1 million dollars? 500,000 DOLLARS??? nO, TODAY, because I'm so enlightened I'm offering this to you for $195!! Some people have suggested I could sell this system for $200 or even $400 dollars, but I said enlightenment and the secret level is for everyone!!! Need some convincing? OK! Check this out: Tired of the same old siddihs? good, because Buddha actually taught a secret set of siddhis, that only I know! For example....and I'm giving away a HUGE secret here... Learn how to communicate with inanimate objects! Find out what they are thinking, their hopes, dreams and desires and use that knowledge to dominate them! Follow my 5 step siddhi system and they will be putty in your hands!! Sofas, refrigerators and Doritos. My system will have them doing anything you want!!! They will be aching for you! P.U.A? NO....P.U.O (pick up object) Women? Forget about it! With 'Beyond Buddhism' after you have attained the secret level women will, quite literally, throw themselves at your feet! Order today! I'll not be around forever, I'll be ascending anytime soon! Waste no time in attaining your birthright! ORDER NOW! If you order now I'll even throw in a bonus, and this in itself has been valued at $5.95! And this is GOLD, 'Buddhist pick up lines 101', in this killer report you'll learn all the pick up lines the most enlightened masters use, people like me; for example, and this always works for me "weren't you my mother in another lifetime?" or the MASSIVE "You've been a very bad girl, it's time for you to balance your karma by coming back to my place". This offer is only available today. Edit: due to my own over excitement at what a fantastic offer this is.

Ahh, but starjumper, you mis-understand! You see what they don't realize is they are practicing 'modified Buddhism'. Mr Buddha in fact taught everyone a form of Buddhism that would only take them to a certain level! For years now I have been in touch with a 'closed door' student of Sid Arther Good Hammer; and he has taught me the secret level....that NO ONE, AND i DO MEAN no one GETS TO, EXCEPT ME AND HIM AND BUDDHA! It kicks sand in the face of all the other Buddhist levels. I am willing to reveal all this in this one time offer! All I require is $5.95 as a mark of faith!!

It's a flexibly minded Buddhists view. Beyond Buddhism I call it! My, that could make a great book title. 'Beyond Buddhism', 'tired of the same old enlightenment? Sick being dependent on your origination? Well buy 'Beyond Buddhism - The Secret Level!' today to find out this kick ass system that is way better than anything that Buddha guy taught!' $5.95. BUT only Today!!

Apparently bananas can help thicken it up, not that I'd know anything about that of course, I've just heard some porn blokes do it. Not that I've ever seen a porn bloke, or a porn for that matter, being the vestal virgin that I am. Here's another article with another suggestion..... its not the top one by the way, which is about something altogether different. http://www.askmen.com/dating/dzimmer_100/117b_love_answers.html ps. it may be better to do some market research first as to what females prefer, watery or .... other. Then you might start wondering sweet/salty. The possibilities are endless....well, there not really.

That avatar of his is what's making me restless!

Is that you Robert Lee??? Have you released any new albums recently?? I do so miss your melodic tones.

Well that's quite interesting. What about if you got the dog to sit up straight on a sofa? And does that mean dancing bears are more likely to achieve enlightenment? What about Koala bears? They spend most of their time tree hugging horizontal, are they more spiritual then? All I seem to end up with is more questions....where's Vaj when you need him...? Vaj, oh Vaj, where for art thou Vaj? Surely he can shed some light on enlightened animals or the possibility thereof.

Man, I was really enjoying myself up to a mother watching her daughter getting shot! I like happy stories!! Happy happy happy!You have a macabre streak you do. You need a few more pink balloons, candy canes and the odd puppy... and don't even think about shooting the puppy! Well, if I remember rightly you did have that dragon thread months ago and you abandoned it. I was most disappointed. It does sound like your own was benevolent. Had he not been you would have felt it distinctly. By the way, what was your friends 8 out of 10 scale all about? The more attractive the higher the score or what? You made me remember one of mine from years ago, anyway, there I was out of my body minding my own business (I wasn't really minding my own business, I went next door to see if I could see the girl next door naked....I was fifteen at the time)when would you adam and eve it, I found a girl next door of altogether different proportions. There she was, naked, lying on the floor, bare breasted and nubian in all her glory, with a 'come hither look' (she was writhing). The thing that was the most distinct about this naughty entity was she had a normally proportioned body (and a very fine one at that) except for her head, her head being about the same size as her torso, and shaped exactly like this...but without the hat: (how she ever balanced it I'll never know) Anyway, what I should have probably taken more notice of, had I been able to see past those fantastically formed breasts, was her flashing red eyes. Never a good sign really, most certainly demonic...but I ask you, what would a 15 year old male do? I mean flashing red eyes or not...come on! So of course I took the plunge! In any case she was probably some kind of succubus and dragged my soul off to the hell regions, I have no idea, although after that some rather nasty ones did start showing up each time I exited the physical for a while. So I guess the moral of the story is 'don't have sex with entities not of your own species'.....unless you really really can't help yourself at the time.

I do like stories! But was that it? No 'what happened next'? No 'happily ever after', and no princess in distress needing to be saved? I'm assuming that was just a teaser, although it was a wonderfully descriptive description I think you need some work on your plotline. Unless it was an arthouse story, in which case I can say nothing. Come on, what happened next???? Tell tell tell!

You have plans for your ass? I'd rather not know. The dragon story was much better. Since we're all here I was wondering if enlightenment was an animal what animal would it be? In my own answer to the question I first thought it could be any animal, as they are perfectly natural, then I realized that followed the Daoist way and not the Buddhist way. The Buddhist way I suppose would be that the animal would be able to see and experience to some degree all his/her past/future lifetimes and be at one with all the other animals. Now I can't say for sure if an animal does or does not experience this all the time, as I can't remember being an animal; but I suspect not as it would give a lion serious problems when hunting a zebra, I mean you wouldn't be as partial to eating zebra if when you did you were hurting yourself would you. Then I started wondering if an animals micro-cosmic orbit is open (maybe someone could chime in on this), or if they even have one. Then I wondered if they do have a micro-cosmic orbit can they become K active? They should be able to if they have a dantien and a micro-cosmic orbit. What would a K active dog look like or do for example? Too many questions and not enough answers. If anyone K active out there has a dog (or cat or budgerigar) please feel free to give it a whirl. You never know, he may become a God amongst dogs. And God is Dog spelt backwards after all, so there may be something in it. edit/ps: I just realized if enlightenment was an animal it would have to be a lama!!!!

I see dead people.