RyanO

I don't know KAP, but I can already tell that I like it simply because of the Secret Smile. I'm a big advocate of the Inner Smile that Healing Tao teaches, and they sound quite similar.

Who's scruffy lookin!

Neat thanks, that clarifies some things.

Wow that's cool. I didn't know they were so closely linked, but then again I haven't studied the two in depth. Is it true they have the same origin? I thought the Kabbalah and I Ching, or the Tree of Life and Bagua, developed in distinct, distant regions (Egypt, China?). I've tried to wrap my head around the differences in the Western and Chinese classical elements (Air/Water/Earth/Fire/Spirit vs. Metal/Water/Wood/Fire/Earth), but to no avail. I like the Chinese emphasis on the elements actually being phases, or wuxing, rather than literal elements like they were thought to be in Greece. I've studied a bit of Wicca (which is inspired in part by Crowley's work) and saw some neat parallels with Taoism, the elements not being one of them. I realize this is a whole 'nother topic of which much could be said...

I agree with markern. The truth is "bad vs nice" is the wrong dichotomy. It's really more about approval seeking. Some guys make the mistake of acting "nice" towards women, instead of being genuine, as a form of approval seeking. Actually, jerks get girls in spite of their jerkiness, because they are confident and comfortable with themselves and are in touch with their yang energy. Yang energy is the polarizing force that causes sexual attraction. Men are able to have attractive yang energy and have heart at the same time. There are often deep seated psychological reasons for the 'nice guy' syndrome. Again see here: http://www.nomoremrniceguy.com/ Perhaps this book might help you reevaluate Deida's work, which I know you have issues with but I think is worthwhile. Also, I second the charismaarts recommendation. I know you have issues with the PUA scene as well. It does have its shortcomings, but being playful with women is important. Hell, being playful with life is important.

This quote from yogi Erich Schiffman has always stuck with me: "You imagine a spinning top. Stillness is like a perfectly centered top, spinning so fast it appears motionless. It appears this way not because it isn't moving, but because it's spinning at full speed. Stillness is not the absence or negation of energy, life, or movement. Stillness is dynamic. It is unconflicted movement, life in harmony with itself, skill in action. It can be experienced whenever there is total, uninhibited, unconflicted participation in the moment you are in - when you are wholeheartedly present with whatever you are doing." from: http://www.movingintostillness.com/book/meditation_moving_into_stillness.html

Haha yeah I don't like that 'tired but can't fall asleep' feeling either. I'm not sure about serious cases of insomnia. But in general I would say to relax the mind and trust the body. It has an intelligence of its own and our monkey mind can get in the way of that. As far as what meditation to do, perhaps a lying Inner Smile would be nice. Instead of tossing and turning, just lie on your back and gently smile with your whole body. Don't worry about getting enough sleep. Pretend that the time you spend consciously relaxing is just as restful as deep sleep. This might help quell some anxiety. Just a thought.

I've heard the triple warmer healing sound "Heeeee" (Chia) can be useful for insomnia. It helps move stuck chi from the head, which can cause insomnia, down through the body and into the earth. I don't usually have problems with insomnia though so I haven't tried it with that intent. Sufficient physical activity during the day is important. One shouldn't 'try' too hard to fall asleep. It should happen naturally. If it doesn't, no big deal, just see it as extra meditation time

I was thinking about how cool this is yesterday. I think the common conception of the emptiness state is that it's stale and lifeless, when in fact the opposite is true: it gets one in touch with powerful spirals of chi.

I don't know about the chakras specifically, but I will say that the Inner Smile can allow some powerful energy flow and help with accessing deep inner realms...

This is a cool thread. I haven't studied/read the I Ching but I definitely plan to! It's interesting that Crowley was into the I Ching. I wonder how he reconciled this with his western orientation. I'm thinking of the five elements, etc...

Me too. Thank you Trunk for this wellspring of wisdom.

Hey thanks for the link Scotty. I learned Winn's version of Primordial Qigong, who learned it from Rubbo's same teacher, Zhu Hui. I went ahead and purchased the ebook, and from what I can tell they are almost identical (the differences being very subtle). Your posting was synchronistic as I was just thinking about the form. I am excited about hearing Rubbo's take and learning more theory. I would however recommend trying to learn it in person or at least on video. I think it might be difficult to learn from a book.

Also check out this website and book: http://www.nomoremrniceguy.com/ The title is meant to be humorous but it's pretty interesting. His point is that some men think they are being 'nice' when in fact they are being insecure and trying to manipulate people into liking them. It doesn't work, and 'nice guys' can end up jaded as a result. Edit: Rewording.

The terminology can get confusing. Strictly speaking, retention means exactly as you say, retaining semen while engaging in sexual practices. True celibate periods however require not just no ejaculation but no sex/masturbation/lust of any kind. It is convenient to use 'retention' as shorthand for any period of non-ejaculation regardless of sexual activity or lack thereof, so sometimes clarification is necessary. To that end, gj551: Were you having sex or masturbating during this period?

I like Michael Winn's teaching that rather than seeing the dantian as a battery-like storage center, view it as a portal to the infinite chi field within us. So 'storing' chi becomes widening the portal. This enhances flow. It is a beautiful paradigm-shift.

But you've done 36 days of retention? Most guys I know couldn't accomplish that. If retaining is making things worse I'd say to practice a healthy, sacred, loving, moderate form of masturbation. It's really not as bad as the fundies say. Retaining beyond a month is getting into advanced territory...

And as far as your practice "not working", I'd say to not be so eager with results. Don't expect them to work like magic. If what you mean is that they're not increasing your success with women, that's not their purpose. That would be a by-product and not a definite one either. If you're not enjoying your practice, do something else. Spiritual practice should be enjoyable. Make love with the universe. I'm gonna go ahead and give the Inner Smile another shout out

Interesting. It mentions sexual exclusivity being preferred by smarter men. That's also interesting. I definitely think there's a correlation between intelligence and these things. Then again, "IQ" isn't everything...

Aw c'mon guys, give him a break. 53 days is great. My last effort was right around there too. Never done the full 100. Maybe when I'm older... I hope the NE was lucid!

I agree with what most have said, and that you've pretty much received the best advice here you're gonna get. So I'm not gonna give any. I and I'm sure others don't want to give the illusion that you're receiving help when in fact you should be seeking professional counsel. That said, I will say that one thing I've learned from spirituality is to treat pain lovingly. We have a natural tendency to hate pain and want things to be different, but I think a better approach is to embrace all sensations and feelings as being children of existence. One of the principles of alchemy is that things can't be destroyed...but they can be transformed.

When I first read the "Discussions On The Way" I was like: "But we're already having discussions." But then I was like: "Oooohhhh..."

Yeah judging from his name this guy joined specifically to respond to markern's post in the ejaculation thread. Cute cat though.

I'm not sure what you're saying here. Could you clarify?