Maddie

I understand the reasons people are giving external answers as an attempt to help with this problem, such as techniques for picking up women and such, but I strongly believe that the root of such problems is not your technique in picking up babes, but your internal balance, or the lack thereof. I believe that problems such as feeling lonely, and feeling uncomfortable speaking to ladies such as has been discussed on here lately are symptoms of internal energy blockages. Therefore I think that the real solution is not to learn how to pick up chicks, but how to find what it is within that is causing this discomfort in the first place and then to learn how to clearn that out.

Thought I would share this link on MCO points and see what others thought about it. http://www.kheper.net/topics/Taoism/microcosmic_orbit.html

Since I do not personally know you it is hard to say for sure, but from what you indicate in a lot of your posts to me at least it seems that a lot of what you are frustrated with is the social interaction aspect in regards to women. I can relate, because I'm not the most outgoing person now, but when I was younger I was really shy and akward around women in particular, so I know how this feels. Usually when ever I encounter a problem in my personal life, I try to track down the source of this problem in my "wiring", and almost always that is where I get solutions. Now I'm not going to say this issue is only one thing to the exclusion of anything else, but just from what I can gather from observation of your posts, it would seem that a large part of your dilema may be due to a throat chakra blockage. Why do I say this? Because the throat chakra is all about communication, social interaction, and how comfortable or uncomfortable we feel with this subject. For example someone with a very open throat chakra would see someone they wished to speak to and most likely feel very comfortable in having a conversation with that person. Because they felt comfortable, the other person would pick up on this and feel comfortable as well, and the conversation would tend to go well. But if on the other hand the person had a blocked throat chakra, and saw someone that they wanted to communicate with, but did not feel comfortable with doing so, first of all they most likely would not begin a conversation with that person in the first place. But if they used a large degree of will power to make themselves go ahead and speak to that person anyways, they would feel quite uncomfortable and the person they were speaking to would pick up on this, and then likewise feel uncomfortable, and most likely the conversation would get no where. So my point in saying all this is to look for the common denominator in your life, and once it is recongnized take steps to correct it, and once that is done things tend to fall in place rather automatically. But never to isolate theory from practice, how does one clear their throat chakra? Well I suppose there are a lot of ways to do so. People go to yoga, use stones, flower essences, homeopathy, qigong, ect... A few techniques that I have personally found to be effective are running the MCO through the throat several times, sort of letting the energy linger there a bit before drawing it back down. I have also used gemstones to a great effect on many of my chakras including the throat. I have also found the Bach Flower remedy "Heather" to be very effective for the throat chakra as well. Yoga has several asanas for this as well. But the main point is deal with the energy first, then things fall into place. P.S. I'm a Tiger too haha

In my own experience I've found if you just sort of focus in the mind on breathing into the testicles, and using the mind to move the energy the rest of the stuff sort of just takes care of itself and seems to know what to do. I don't really pay that much attention to the various muscles n such, I just breath and focus on the energy. At least it works for me.

Hmmm thats sort of what I thought which is why I asked the question. Cause on one hand I feel like I am making a lot of progress lately, but on the other hand I feel sooooo exhausted that doing almost anything has been difficult. The reason I included homeopahty, and flower essences is not only because do I use them a lot, as I am using them right now, but also because they are considered "vibrational medicine". They cause your body to beging to heal itself, which to me sounds a lot like what doing Qigong does. So I was guessing that if your doing qigong, homeopahty, flower essences, and they are all causing your body to direct its own energy towards healing purposes, that is not going to leave a lot of energy left over for much else...

Gilles Marin in his book "Five Elements Six Conditions" goes in depth about the emotional/mental qualities of our various organs. The Lungs store either self respect/pride/courge/healthy boundries, or sadness/poor boundries/ low self esteem. The Spleen deals with how we feel about ourselves, our sense of belonging, or rejection, comfort, nuturing, worry. "Self esteem issues" are complex, and not everyone fits into the same pattern. If your intrensic value of yourself as an individual is low this might be more indicitive of a blockage in your lungs, but if your self esteem is low in the realm of feeling like a social reject, or not accepted, then this might indicate more of a Spleen issue. If you feel awkward relating to people this could be more of a heart issue, as the heart/ emporer is responsible for our healthy social interactions with others and society at large. In my own case my Spleen issue was feeling like somewhat of an outcast, or rejected. In TCM and Qigong our organs are responsible for more than just their obvious physical functions, but as a meridian system they are responsible to all sorts of emotions and mental outlooks. It might make a little more sense if you take the organs physical functions as an allegory. The stomach/spleen system are responsible for taking in food, breaking it down, and assimilating what we need. When one is "taken in" they feel accepted, but if they are metephorically "vomitted out" they feel rejected. The stomach churns food around, if all goes well its digested, but if it can not digest what ever is eatten, the food just keeps going round and round getting no where. If we are unable to "digest" thoughts they just keep going round and round in our mind, and we get no where. Thinking in circles and worry is a negitive aspect of the spleen/stomach. The lungs are where our boundries are. They take in oxygen, separate it out of the air, remove carbon dioxide and expell it.... boundries. Hope it makes a bit more sense in this light. Here is a link that goes into more detail. http://www.heavenearthchineseherbs.com/five_organs.html?zenid=8q0ef8ppq0lltucmqjcstbfjg4

Ok I'm not 100% completely sure, but just based upon what you stated this is my most plausable theory. I have noticed that when I increase the amount of energy I am running through my various channels that I tend to feel vibrations, due to the increased friction between the higher energy level, and the channel. Its like Oms in an electrical circut. The oms are the amount of resistance, and the higher the resistance the more it causes the medium through which it is traveling to vibate. This is the concept behind most electric heating devices. The resistance causes vibration, and vibration produces heat. So how I beleive this relates to you... You have taking herbs to build your kidney yin. Now you have a greater amount of energy running through your system than before. Your channels are not used to this volume at the moment, so there is greater resistance, thus greater vibration. This is only temporary though because once your body recognizes this greater flow of energy it will adapt, your channels will open more to handel the greater energy volume, and once that occurs the vibrations (which are just a symptom of resistance) will gradually subside.

Yes they are, but he does not seem to put the same emphasis on the Cold Draw. I personally think its one of the best things to ever happen to me. I have almost completely eliminated my sex drive with it, its wonderful. I had been doing the Big Draw for a few years and it did nothing to reduce my sex drive, if anything it only made it worse. The Cold Draw on the other hand is something I have been doing recently for a couple months, and its fantastic. Its a pitty that it does not recieve more attention, because I think it accomplishes what most guys who are on this path are really looking for. Now I can go about my day and see pretty girls and feel neutral about it. Don't get me wrong if they are pretty I of course recognize this, but more in the same way that you look at a sunset, landscape, or archetecture that you think is pretty. You know its astetically pleasing to the eye, but you don't feel sexual desire for such an object. This has had the great effect of allowing me to focus on developing love in my heart with out the distractions of lust, desire, and attachment. My advice in learning the cold draw is to be patient with it, and take your time. Like anything new that you try to learn its kind of slow at first, and a bit tricky to get the feel for it. But if you are patient and stick with it, you will get the hang of it. I spent a few hours the first few times just trying to get the jing chi to my sacrum. No big deal I just stopped there, and patiently kept at it for a couple weeks until my sacrum opened more, and the jing was able to go high up my MCO. I have found from my personal experience that moving chi up the MCO is easier because it is less dense, and jing is slower and more difficult because it is more dense.

In regards to loneliness I have been working on my throat chakra, heart, and spleen lately, and this has been getting results. The throat chakra has to do with commuincation, so if we have a blockage there then we may feel cut off from others and ourselves due to lack of communication. The heart, or the "emporer" is incharge of our interactions with others, and the spleen is responsible for our sense of comfort and acceptence (and self acceptence). In the past I have found that the root of just about all my problems is internal, even if at the beginning I thought it was external. I've found flower essences and homeopahty to be very helpful in addition to Qigong practice.

Non, I would recommend the Larch Bach flower remedy for you, I think it would help a lot. http://www.anandaapothecary.com/english/larch-flower-essence.html the link is all about what it does.

I've been doing the cold draw (which is aka testicle breathing) a lot more lately, and the big draw a lot less and have been very happy to do so, I feel much more calm. The big draw had a tendency to agitate me more. Now that I have been doing the cold draw almost exclusively retention seems easy now.

I'm curious about something lately. Can doing a lot of healing such as Qigong, flower essences, homeopathy, ect... make you very tired as your body begins using your energy reserves for the healing process?

I think I remember hearing of some yogi guru who said that if we do not love ourselves then we seek love from an external source, i.e. another human being.... thoughts??

I sort of meant need as in neediness, being clingy, needy, ect... which is very similar to want, desire, ect..

I think I understand you?? I have pretty much gotten the sexual urge part of this under control well by doing the cold draw/testicle breathing. What I'm finding to be a bit more tricky is getting the companionship thing under control. If I could learn an internal alchemy method to deal with that I'd be pretty pleased.

That pretty much sums up my thoughts on this recently.

You know I've sort of been pondering this topic from a slightly different angel. I am in a really bad relationship, and hope to get out of it in the not to distant future. Thing is I have been pondering what it is to be sociable. Ideal I do not want to go out and get in another relationship, but as I ponder being singel again it seems to have this very strong draw on me. I can't exactely explain why but I have begun to view needing/wanting to be in a relationship with someone as a "weakness", maybe its stupid, but it seems like a position of "lack". I guess I think that if something in me was not lacking that I would not desire another person, because I'd be content with in myself. Now I know the hermits and monks do not get into relationships for the most part, and if they do it all their life then they never do. So is this the highest ideal? Is wanting and needing someone else a sign of too much attachment, or neediness?

Yes this is Yin deficiency.... this is a link to herbs for that. http://www.agelessherbs.com/YinValleyFormula.html P.S. I don't work for this company, but I do use them a lot.

If anyone read what I posted in the asking a girl in yoga class out thread yesterday, then this will make sense. I was at work today again, and around that Postal guy again. Today after getting rejected by the girl I felt something different from him, yet also very stong. I felt an intense loneliness. Everytimes he would walk by me I felt it so strong in my middle dan tien area and throat chakra. I know this guy is on some sort of meds for mental problems, and I also know that what ever he happens to be feeling radiates out very strong. I assumed the loneliness is due to him getting rejected by every girl on the planet. The pressure in the throat chakra was unexpected, but I assume he feels that he can not adequately express himself?? I'm just not sure why I feel his emotional energy sooooo strong?

If I think back to as far as I can remember I now realize I have always been somewhat sensitive to other people's emotions states, but for a long time I did not realize this, which was quite miserable. Since beginning Qigong a couple years ago, my sensitivity has increased, but so has my understanding as to what was really going on as well. Take for example that incident at work I mentioned. In the past I would most certainly feel that guys jeaoulsy, anger, lust, ect... but not realize that it was not originating in me, and thus think that those feelings were my own, and then wonder what the hell was wrong with myself for feeling that way spontaneously. It actually did catch me off guard for a few minuets, but once I headed out on the delivery and did the liver cleaning, then I knew what was going on lol. The fact that everyone felt more relaxed after Mr. Postal went home only confirmed two things, that I was correct about the source, and that other people were feeling it too, and just did not realize where it was coming from.

I have a book about yoga and chakras all together, and it says that the fish pose is for opening the heart chakra.

I've observed with myself and in others that a lot of what we men do in honing our social skills actually is just EGO issues. How many times have we seen a good looking woman and wanted to impress her in some way or another not necessarily because we truely liked her (perhaps we didn't even know her) but to "prove" someething to ourselves, or to our egos?

I was curious if anyone had knowledge or experience with the symptoms and/or side effects of progressing in cultivation? It seems that I will have four or five really good days of doing my Qigong, and then a day or two of feeling really crappy where I can not practice. Then this will clear up and I will resume practice again for several days until I feel crappy again for no reason that I can tell in particular. For example I might just feel really tired one day even though I went to bed at a normal time, or feel weak, or cold, or slightly sickly, or just generally bad. Its not like I get sick, because I don't get a fever or actually get ill in the real sense, but I just have this vauge and unusual feeling of not feeling good. Is this a part of the process of clearing your channels and opening blockages?

You know I can offer a different take on this topic, and yes I know it is not the origianl topic, but it still has to do with male/female dynamics, and how it can all relate back to Tao. Ok yesterday I'm at work, there are 4 guys and one young girl, so this made for an interesting situation to say the least. Let me break down the line up in order to explain how events played out. The line up for the guys follows... Me (unhappily married), Mr. Postal (not his real name, but most work places have that guy who you can just picture going postal one day), the assistant manager (a decent chap, late 30's, divorced), Tex (a married guy, roughly my age I believe who is good natured), and the "girl" (just graduated high school last spring and now in community college). So here is the back ground... Mr. Postal I've been told has so far hit on every single female unfortunate enough to work in this place, and so far his sucess rate is 0. So yesterday at work Mr. Postal is really trying to put the moves on the girl, he bought her a cookie so I guess he figured she owed him something. She goes to the assistant manager and tell him that Mr. Postal is creeping her out (as usual). The place is very slow last night, so we are all just hanging out and shooting the breeze killing time, chit chatting. Now I've had this unfortunate condition, which has only gotten worse with Qigong of being extremely sensitive to other peoples emotional conditions. So as this chit chat group is going along, first I feel an extreme degree of sexual tension, followed a few minutes later by an extreme feeling of school boy jealousy and resentment. Then Mr. Postal actually gives me one of his delieveries so that he can continue to put the moves on the girl!! So I go off on my delievery feeling this extreme amount of inmature jealousy (like middle school all over again) and I am thinking "what the hell is wrong with me!!!???". So I start doing the liver healing sound and inner smile as I'm driving, rather disappointed cause I seem to be back in the middle school level of emotional maturity. So I begin to feel better, and as I return to the store, I begin to feel it again! and I am soooooo disappointed in myself. Ok so fast foward a couple hours and now Mr. Postal has gone home. Suddenly the atmosphere has completely changed, and I no longer feel this school boy jealousy, what a relief. Then that is when it goes *ding *ding *ding, and I understand what was going on all this time. Appearantly Mr. Postal was getting very jealous that the girl had been talking to the rest of us and was not into him. He then began to radiate a very VERY powerful aura of jealousy/anger (which would be why I kept feeling I had to clean out my liver, and actually felt jealous about this girl!!! which was very disconcerting!!! (shes a nice lass, but the pierced and tattooed everywhere type, which is not my type at all) I was sooooo glad that guy left, for after he did the how place returned to normal so fast. But nevertheless it was an interesting insight into how irrational these things can be. I just wish I was not so sensitive to other people's emotions.

largetalons.bmp Napoleon "Do the chickens have large talons?" Farmer "I don't understand a word you just said" Im the farmer here