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~ DILGO KHYENTSE RINPOCHE ~ The body contains channels and the mind is associated with the energies that flow through the channels. When the impure karmic energy associated with the deluded mind flows through impure channels, it gives rise to the three poisons – attachment, aversion, and bewilderment. If the karmic energy that creates these three poisons is purified, this allows the wisdom energy to arise. And when one’s channels, energies, and essence become wisdom channels, wisdom energy, and wisdom essence, one obtains supreme concentration, perfect recollection, and irradiating confidence.

My understanding is that the people of Gautama's time were largely superstitious, and believed strongly that their fate, and the fate of everything else, lies in the hands of the gods they revered. Gautama presented an alternative view which basically challenged this premise using very simple deductions based on the Four Noble Truths. I think what he wanted very much for his listeners/followers to understand is that each individual has their own karmic propensities, and because of this, each will perceive Brahman according to their own unique propensities, and therefore, Gautama posed the question whether or not the gods (under the command of an assumed triune Godhead) that supposedly appropriate punishment and reward, are actually doing that without regard for the possibility of some form of complex mitigating circumstances that the individual, in some small way, must first be personally held to account (rather than shunning all responsibility, which was prevalent at the time, and, strangely, still persists till this day). If the answer is yes, then there must be a way to work on those circumstances personally without having to defer to external adjudicating forces deemed greater or more powerful.

Good question I can't speak for Buddhism, but I believe it was an oft-asked question during the time of Gautama, and one for which he opted to remain silent on, perhaps an indication of the absolute enormity and profoundness of subject when contrasted with the scale and limits of the mortal mind in harnessing such knowledge which may or likely may not have any bearing on the illumination that awaits from practicing the Dharma according to the Dharma as taught by Gautama the Buddha.

Young phoenix hatches dragons love phoenix hatchlings goes well with pu erh

~ JAMGON KONGTRUL ~ Rely on timeless awareness, which is free of elaboration, without identity, and the very essence of being; do not rely on ordinary consciousness, which is a mind fixated on characteristics and concepts. Timeless awareness entails (a) understanding that the way in which phenomena actually abide is, from the ultimate perspective, free of all limitations imposed by elaborations of origination, cessation, and so forth; (b) realization of the nonexistence of the two kinds of identity; (c) unerring knowledge of sugatagarbha as utter lucidity, the way in which things actually abide, beyond any context of speculative value judgments. It is on this awareness that one should rely. Ordinary consciousness entails (a) belief that what one immediately perceives constitutes something truly existent; (b) conceptualization in terms of characteristics, such as the sense of personal identity and the mind-body aggregates; (c) mental states that are conditioned, for example, by attitudes of naively fixating on the pleasures of the senses. One should not rely on such consciousness.

~ WILLIAM COBB ~ Emptiness refers to the absence of something that, for some reason, one expects to find—as when we say a glass, normally used to hold liquids, is empty even though it is full of air. The point is not that there is nothing there at all, but rather that what is there differs from your expectations.

Does the saying, "Those with nothing left to lose stand to gain the most" make any sense to you at this point? The fact of the matter is, none of us actually possess anything, but the thing is, we imagine we do, and it is this imaginative worldview that propels many people's actions. Driven by craving, humans experience strife, unsatisfactoriness, and ultimately, through misunderstanding fundamental yet simple principles, bind themselves in this vicious loop which appear to be overwhelmingly forlorn, as if caught in an invisible trap that they are unable to extricate themselves from. Have you ever wondered why, among all the classes of beings, only humans appear to possess the knack to imagine and weave personal tales of woe? Do you ever ask yourself if there's a purpose to this? Truth is, there is. It only appears aimless when we begin to project comparatively opposing scenes onto the mind-screen, and imagine that these contrasting scenes are somehow more worthy & objective, and therein begins the big lie. We do not need to detest suffering, nor cherish the emancipation of it. Hope & fear is at the heart of all human miseries. Just contemplate on the idea if the way out of misery is thru the abandonment of both, and what freedom means when one has learnt of the inherent deception that is at the heart of the force that ignites hope & fear. Suicide is messy, and quite selfish, to be honest. I pray you will find a spark from somewhere to alter this forlorn wish. Since you have nothing left to lose, why not Practice being kind in small ways, if not to fellow humans, at least to yourself, or to animals, insects even. There are always opportunities for this. Though we may be enduring deep suffering, it does not remove the seed of compassion in our hearts. The potential for watering this seed by simple acts of kindness is always present, and even if you manage just one small act of kindness a week, or even one a month, it is something noble and worthy, and at the point of that one singular action, you are equal to Chenrezig and all other enlightened beings in all the cosmos, across all time and space. I pray for peace in your every step.

~ JOHN O DONOHUE ~ NOTHING IS LOST All through your life, the most precious experiences seem to vanish. Transience turns everything to air. You look behind and see no sign even of a yesterday that was so intense. Yet in truth, nothing ever disappears, nothing is lost. Everything that happens to us in the world passes into us. It all becomes part of the inner temple of the soul and it can never be lost. This is the art of the soul: to harvest your deeper life from all the seasons of your experience. This is probably why the soul never surfaces fully. The intimacy and tenderness of its light would blind us. We continue in our days to wander between the shadowing and the brightening, while all the time a more subtle brightness sustains us. If we could but realize the sureness around us, we would be much more courageous in our lives. The frames of anxiety that keep us caged would dissolve. We would live the life we love and in that way, day by day, free our future from the weight of regret.

The monkey is reaching For the moon in the water. Until death overtakes him He’ll never give up. If he’d let go the branch and Disappear in the deep pool, The whole world would shine With dazzling pureness. – Hakuin

I suppose the fundamental difference between wonderment & curiosity need to be expanded slightly.... Wonderment is when something captivates, followed almost instantly by a natural unfolding of delight that is in the main unselfish; Curiosity is when this captivation is measured against the needs and wants of the "I", and driven by unconscious emotions, makes one seek possession of the object based on projected feelings imagined to be satisfactory, which likely will not be ultimately.

I think what children has is a sense of wonderment, but can understand why adults would term it curiosity. This same wonderment, initially free of taints, gets increasingly convoluted with age, which is then woven into unrealistic drives for sense gratifications, and this in turn gives birth to a whole host of other less simple "seeds" of desire, each waiting to sprout upon contact with associated thoughts (or patterns of thoughts). Children have thoughts too, but theirs are less driven by pride, desire, and so on. Unfortunately, they pick up adult stuff way too quickly.

Just contemplate as you go about your life experiences, and one fortunate day, perhaps the why will change into why not The Zen masters may have known something when they came up with the monkey mind analogy. It is the curiosity impulse that feeds the grosser base emotions while compounding the arising/festering of dualistic tendencies; Its by the taming of this same impulse that one gradually experience the soothing and calming of those same emotions. In mastering this impulse, one experiences freedom from reactionary forces and ingrained habits, ultimately leading to release.

~ KALU RINPOCHE ~ When you meditate, do not try to have good thoughts, do not try to keep away bad thoughts, do not try to stop thoughts, and do not try to go after them. Rather, rest in a state of being aware of the thoughts as they arise. This way, when bad thoughts arise, they arise out of the emptiness of mind and fall back into the emptiness of mind. The same is true for good thoughts. This same process of examination can be applied to the many other traps of personality and physiology. For instance, are your emotions of desire and anger coming from the same mind, or from different minds? And, as to the sounds, tastes, sights, smells, and sensory experiences which can be so pleasing or displeasing to you, are these coming from the same mind, or from different minds? When you take the time to thoroughly examine such issues, you will eventually come to conclusions that help formulate later stages of realization. In realizing the inherent emptiness of all reality, you will realize that the essence of the mind (which is also empty) pervades all things; as such, it is the seat of dharmakaya. When you recognize that the clarity of the mind is also its natural state of being, you will realize that clarity as such is the seat of sambhogakaya. For a buddha, who rests in natural liberation in dharmakaya, the clarity of mind, the seat of sambhogakaya, allows knowledge of the three times of past, present, and future. In recognizing that the many thoughts that arise in the mind are essentially unimpeded, you will realize that unimpededness as such is the seat of nirmanakaya. It is wholly because of the unimpededness of pure mind that buddhas manifest in forms of ordinary and supreme incarnations in the nirmanakaya state in order to benefit all sentient beings.

~ GAMPOPA ~ The perception of the external world is dependent on the mind. We cannot find a material world that exists totally separately from the mind. The material world is a reflection of the mind rather than an independently existing thing. If your understanding of this leads you to realise the nature of mind, you will automatically realise the nature of the external world. It is not necessary to separately examine the nature of the world. We realise the nature of the external world through realising the nature of mind because of unity in diversity. This is the same as the realisation of non-dual wisdom.

The pacification of curiosity is the highest, most advanced attainment in Buddhist meditation. Among all classes of sentient beings, only humans have the capacity for the complete cessation of the curiosity impulse.

What was inferred was not that the body's a nasty crap receptacle, but a mere vehicle with limitations, and to not over-reach with expectations while holding to an awareness of when to let go of associated dependencies. Because of these limitations, transcendence or malleability at the physical level has its own apparent frustrations.

Got to soap the toes wriggly, wiggly extensions prompting *eu-no-ia *a state of wellness; kindness & benevolence

Keep in mind that working with energy requires familiarisation with the subtle channels, meaning it requires skillful knowledge of the subtle body. While fasting and conditioning internal organs are helpful to a point, the primary consideration will always remain focussed on the subtle body (as visualised to be ethereal, with chakras, channels and so on, each lighted accordingly). The purpose of conditioning the physical body is to discipline the arising of acute concentration facilitating prolonged clarity in maintaining said visualisation. Once this concentration is habituated, the routines involving physical manipulations take on a secondary role. Yet, there are many (loosely termed as yogis) who find it challenging to let go of the concentration on the physical because of the addiction to the "highs" generated. But these highs, being temporal, create a cycle of dependency. Therefore, its good to be aware the bliss generated thru conditioning this gross physical body is rather limited, ie shallow, effortful, and ultimately unsatisfactory.

~ TRALEG KYABGÖN RINPOCHE ~ EQUANIMITY In order to cope better with our own roller coaster of emotions, the starting point is to develop equanimity. In the Buddhist tradition it's not a question of contriving or manufacturing equanimity. It's nothing to do with positive thinking, or blotting out the negative, or making affirmations. Equanimity is a discovery. It is discovered to be ever present. Underneath our roller coaster experience of pain, pleasure, happiness and dissatisfaction is the basic ground of our being, which is equanimity. Equanimity means the absence of evaluation. Usually we are unable to look at the situation or deal with anybody without superimposing our own value judgments or subjective evaluations. We never see situations as they simply are. Our value judgments colour our understanding of the world and other people. Usually when we meet someone, even while we are in the midst of conversation, we are drawing our conclusions. Then we go away with a fixed impression that he is like this and like that. We project onto people rather than relate to them as they are. So equanimity is the key which unlocks the whole toolbox of spiritual development. It gives us access to the enormous diversity of tools available to anyone who wants to be more effective, capable, loving and compassionate. Equanimity is the start of the spiritual path. Equanimity is not apathy. It is not a fatalistic indifference to what is going on. Equanimity is being completely open to reality so we can directly experience things as they are, rather than interpreting everything and making it into a second hand experience.

tears streaming down cheeks oddly blissful sensation where do tears reside?

~ Thinley Norbu Rinpoche ~ The Buddhist view is to recognize that we must not remain within ordinary phenomena by following a worldly philosophy limited to ordinary, substantial reasoning. We must decide to increase pure phenomena by following a spiritual philosophy which goes beyond ordinary reasoning and leads to enlightenment. Buddhist philosophy is entirely spiritual. Its purpose is to refute the views of the two extremes of nihilism and eternalism by the skillful means of wisdom, to release all beings to enlightenment. Some nihilists in particular think that Buddhism is only a philosophy and not a religion. This misunderstanding is the result of holding the nihilist point of view, which does not accept the intangible, imperceptible qualities of nondualistic wisdom that can appear tangibly or intangibly. Because the nihilist point of view is confined to the reasoning of dualistic mind, it is actually impossible to use it to define or evaluate the qualities of Buddhism deeply and clearly, since they are beyond ordinary perception. Even the difference between ordinary and spiritual qualities cannot be analyzed. The nihilist view of believing only in this momentary life is the result of considering substance to be the fundamental constituent of all phenomena, including one’s body, the objective gross elements, whatever arises from these gross elements, and whatever can be perceived. There are many different ways to understand substance within relative truth, since there are infinite relative truths. Nihilism means becoming caught within each temporary circumstance of relative truth and believing in its reality, so the perception of substance seems real. From the Buddhist point of view, everything that exists in samsara is substance. The origin of substance is dualistic mind. There is no end to substance because there is no end to the conceptions of dualistic mind. Whenever the buddhanature of sentient beings is dormant and dualistic mind appears, the ordinary passions and the incalculable phenomena of the karmic elements arise, which are all composed of substance. Substance is not only one part of something. It is all the immeasurable forms of samsaric existence, unless it is transformed into immeasurable, substanceless, wisdom light appearances which are beyond all interdependent cause and result. This is the meaning of substancelessness. Substanceless wisdom is unobstructed and pervades everywhere in samsara and nirvana without intention as self-accomplished compassion, so it can manifest within substance, but it never remains there. Its essence is always nonsubstance, which is the quality of Buddha.

Sample vid

According to most authentic yoga systems, there are preparatory stages to familiarise with prior to mastery of breath retention. If you had adapted properly to these preliminary exercises, the fluctuations between mundanity and bliss ought to have been pacified by now, but the admission of having to gasp for breath and the irregularities that brought this about somewhat indicates you may not have attended to a proper grounding in pranayoga aka pranayama. I'd recommend reading up on Vase Breathing, specifically tutorials and videos by Dr. Nida Chenagtsang.

Perhaps the Law of Universal Energy Response has been set in motion, which means this thread had to happen. But I think its okay. Thusly, it began, thusly it wanes. Expressions of intent, yay or nay, sustains that energy. Just knowing that is awareness. For me, at least.

okay