LazyChuan

You seem to have struck a chord with many people here Anyone who touches the deeper aspects of themselves becomes well acquainted with suffering, the inverse curves and coils of our nature, Here is something I have found, thats relevant to me, maybe you can see if its relevant for you? When resistance is high, trying to connect, be present or practice can amplify the resistance. Sometimes practice, meditation or 'trying' to drop into presence is a way of attempting to control or change our experience. Ionically the fastest way to change things, is to stop trying to change things. The easiest thing in the world, is letting the world be as it is. As far as thinking you'll never be where everyone else is, this place is called 'taobums' for a reason

Thanks for posting. I remember my first Vipassana retreat, pretty dark times! Sometimes words can't reach us, but later on, the storm will change, and spring will arrive.

Frankincense will help clear the space. My recommendation would be stop trying to meditate, just sit eyes open, maybe in a park or nature, and let go of trying to have a meditation 'experience'. Neither grab or push away thoughts or feelings, see if you can be frictionless. See how well you can 'do nothing'. If the fear comes, don't get involved in it. Easy to say, actually easy to do too, but not so nice if you don't.

I'm not a fan of Bradford Keeney, but I think his heart is in the right place. You are always right to look closely when lineage is claimed. "Tuition for the two-year program is $4,000", which covers 20 days of intensive (in 5 day retreats), and online learning to support that. That is not any more than many other teachers would charge on a per/day basis. Sometimes its so the teacher can eat, or support a monastic community, but among some of my teachers, the money is just an expression of sincerity, they really don't care about it anyway (not always the case). I agree that you would want to find a teacher who can transmit, if you are interested in that kind of formless energy practice.

"As I understand it, this feeling of oneness is experienced in only two ways. Someone "wakes up", becoming enlightened. Or they die and come back." You said it! Waking up is actually dying and not coming back, while still in a physical form. In a very real sense, 'no one' wakes up. Our identities are drawn to Oneness, it sounds pretty sexy. Merging with a sense of utter acceptance with all reality, and some bliss/laughter at the feeling that it's all not really real! It's not waking up, but its very nice. Quite hard to maintain for ever, so a bit of suffering building potential also. Genuine Letting go, giving up, forgiveness, acceptance etc are all movements towards this. It's the sales pitch that can often move a person towards actually waking up, or keep them from ever wanting to go there... Oneness, as everyone has expressed so well above, is actually the natural state already present. Our mind just has a long long habit of creating the experience of separation. A willingness to be as you are, in this present moment, with nothing added, perhaps something taken away Acceptance

Some teachers teach in dreams, and check out prospective students. Apparently sometimes the teacher can't remember the dream, but what their student remembers is correct, sometimes even secret, knowledge and part of the transmission process. Theirs a mention in Terry Dunn's Flying phoenix chi gong from someone who only just started practicing and saw GM Doo Wai in his dreams, and Sifu Terry and Sifu Garry talked about its significance.

'Meeting the Medicine Men: An Englishman's Travels Among the Navajo' is excellent.

Oooop apologies for the stupid male approach ( I hear Jing and immediately think of Balls) and shabby formating. Seriously though, if your interested in the western explanation of Taosit terms then braving Dr. Lins site actionlove.com is fairly mind expanding as he explains all TCM ideas in a deep, anatomical western scientific approach. There are also hundreds of emails from people to him describing their symptoms which you are interested in? Hope this helps more than the last post... LazyChuan

Hi, If you are choosing to apply a 'Western' perspective on the mystical (which is fine, just remember it works the other way equally and possibly more helpfully for actual transformation), then yes, hormones (high levels of testosterone, HGH and DHT with low sympathetic nervous system responses of adrenaline and cortisol) and neurotransmitters (lots of serotonin, dopamine, endorphins) as well as quality and amount of sperm and the health of your DNA and bone marrow are possible 'physical' candidates for the state of your Jing, even though this interpretation (the health of the endocrine glands and bodily systems as a 'function') is contradictionary with the TCM view (an absolutely determined and finite level of energy). For ways to target the 'physical system' of Jing you can go two ways; seeking 'the internal from the external' would involve perhaps a good diet, sleep excersice and tonics; Dr Lin of the horrific site 'actionlove.com' sells some pretty good pills that stimulate the production of neurotransmitters and healthy hormones in a non-harmful way. His sexual qigong (accessible for free on his monstrously badly organized site) is fantastic and would be a fun alternative to the 'retention' normally attempted by those who want to increase Jing. The 'from the inside out' approach is to do lots meditation, bone marrow breathing, circulating sexual energy, chilling out, getting happy and using your will and expectation (Yi) to increase the effectiveness of any external stuff you may do. Remember 'Yi (mind/intent/will) leads chi' extends far beyond qigong. Hope this helps, LazyChuan

Hi Bums! I have enjoyed occasional stalking of this forum for a few years, enjoying the diverse mix of practices and practitioners. About me? I enjoy meditation, energy work and getting hit, X