Lomistick

To whom it may concern, I have read countless forums, websites, and books on this issue without reaching a complete level of understanding or knowledge on it. I discovered the power of the retention of one's seed when I was 23 years old. It has been a life long dream to figure out how to harness that power for my health, spiritual growth, and longevity in life. I have been trying to solve this "problem" and "unlock the riddle" so to speak off and on for 9 years now, without reaching a level that I would deem "successful". I would like to ask for any help that I can. I have done 1 year of tai chi quan (15 hours a week). I've done tons of chi gong, meditation, and practices all geared towards this sort of practice. Recently (last month) I hit a huge milestone and broke my previous record of 40 days of retention. I abstained from all sexual activity for 43 days and established to myself that I could hold out indefinitely. If anyone is thinking about posting "You're learning this for the wrong reasons" or any silly stuff like that, or "You need to study 2 years of basic healing sounds, inner smile, and stuff like that before trying this", please just don't bother posting. I need real help and guidance. I've taken 6 months of courses from one of Michael Winn's teachers on top of my tai chi training and while it was lovely none of it helped a great deal for this particular problem. The teacher promised to teach me the microcosmic orbit and said it would be exactly what I needed, but I was greatly disappointed with the end result of that. Here are my issues: While I have great willpower and can abstain from sex indefinitely, the "energy" leaks out in my sleep. The moment I go to sleep, despite having no dreams of sex or any sexual thoughts, I maintain an erection all night and the energy slowly drains out. In other words, strict and permanent celibacy does not work for harnessing this energy. Over time my "cup" "fills up" so to speak, and begins spilling over. The energy needs to be moved, transmuted, or relieved, but I do not know any techniques that work for this. I have tried meditation, the microcosmic orbit, the "million dollar spot", controlling my PC muscles, breathing techniques, using my mind to "guide" the energy, and a long list of other techniques that others have suggested including "sat nam" and yogic types of exercises. I have read Mantak Chia's book and tried just about all of his techniques. I've practiced them for countless hours. When I do the microcosmic orbit, or the "big draw", or any of those practices, I feel a "cold energy" rising at the base of my spine. I've managed to get it to move part of the way up my back. I can feel a sort of energy moving. I also get "vibratory sensations" or "pumping sensations" in my spine when I have a lot of energy that has built up. Still, I am not able to conserve this energy, prevent it from flowing outward, and keeping it all for myself. What I need: I need a way to reduce, lessen, or move all of the "energy" that is constantly building up in my genitals. It just keeps building and building every day, and I don't know what to do with it. None of the techniques I have tried seem to work. The best thing I can do is use my PC muscles to clench and squeeze during sexual activity to minimize the amount of fluid I lose, but I end up urinating sexual fluid out through my bladder and in the end I lose energy. The whole time I'm doing this, I'm trying to use my breath, mind, microcosmic orbit, and other things to "guide" the energy "UP" instead of "down and out," and I have succeeded to some small degree, but nowhere near the level that I would like to reach. The energy always leaks out. The reason I'm posting this now is because I always thought that if I had enough willpower to maintain strict celibacy, that I would be able to retain my energy completely, and that I'd be able to build my energy levels, but as it turns out, celibacy doesn't cut it. You need some sort of practice or your cup just begins spilling over. I'm not horribly optimistic that anyone here can help me, but I thought I would try. I've been at this for 9 years now, and I would like to learn how to retain my seed before I start getting older. It would be depressing for me to live this life without ever having accomplished this or figured it out, especially after learning about it 9 years ago. Another question I have, is this practice REALLY this hard? I mean, I've been trying to learn it for 9 years with marginal success. It's difficult for me that the understand that the human body seems to be built to harness this sort of energy, and yet the method at which to do so seems to elude most the entire human population. It seems incredibly difficult. Am I overthinking this? Any and all help would be greatly appreciated.

I am speechless. The information you have all provided is jaw-droppingly good. I extend all of you my sincerest gratitude. Whatever time and effort you took in posting this valuable information has helped another human being immensely. I didn't expect to get even a single useful post, and there were so many. Wow, thank you all so much. Thank you thank you thank you.

To all that are willing to help, My goal is to learn how to conserve my sexual energy. I wish to be able to conserve my sexual energy and not lose it through the loss of fluids. Celibacy does not seem to be the stand-alone answer for me, as the energy simply builds up over time and then I lose it while I'm asleep when I have no conscious control over it. Sexual abstinence simply causes a huge build up of energy in my groin that irritates me and basically causes unacceptable discomfort. I would be absolutely fine with abstaining from sex if I knew how to calm my urges or dissipate the energy somehow, but this does not occur from simple meditation and a healthy diet for me. I have heard about all of the possible dangers of practicing on your own without a teacher. I have also heard of the dangers of trying to move energy around your body with your mind. My question to you all is... If I simply want to achieve this one goal of conserving my sexual energy, how would I go about doing it? What daily practices should I employ? How should I change my life to make accomplishing this goal a possible outcome? Is accomplishing this goal really as incredibly difficult as it seems? Or am I just lacking proper instruction? I have wasted lots of money on "qualified" teachers that have not been able to help me, and I do not wish to waste anymore money, so any and all help would be greatly appreciated.

This thread is a call for help. I am truly in need of guidance from those that are experienced and wise. I am sexually confused and I have been stuck in this situation for 7 years now. I am unable to enjoy sexy, I am unable to have fulfilling relationships with women. Please help. Please hear my story: Though my life is going fantastically well, there is one aspect that is really terrible and in need of help... My sexuality. About 7 years ago, I read a book that introduced me to the idea that there was energy/chi in my body that I could move and control. After experimenting with it, I found that it was indeed true, however, I awakened my energy body in the process causing a lot of negative side effects. I felt a tingling that felt like small air bubbles under my skin moving around, tickling and annoying the heck out of me. I also felt an itching sensation in certain areas that caused me to scratch at myself. I had never felt or had this problem before and these sensations REALLY bothered me. I am not able to "un-awaken" my energy body and go back to how it was before. I found a way to make these sensations subside, and that is through sexual abstinence. I learned that the sensations intensify the more I ejaculate. The longer I abstain from sex, the milder the sensations became to the point that I didn't really even think about them so much anymore. However, this gave birth to a new sensation, a pressure building in my groin area. It feels like a tremendous aching pressure that needs release. Eventually it becomes painful. So this forced me to begin to study how to control sexual energy. Through Mantak Chia's books I taught myself how to have a "retroglade ejeculation" by squeezing my PC muscles. This allowed me to have sex more often without losing such a tremendous amount of energy, though I still lose a lot. However, these "retroglade ejaculations" gave birth to a new painful sensation in my abdomen. It feels like there is a build up of some kind of pressure at a spot 1 or 2 inches above where my left thigh meets my abdomen. If I have too many retroglade ejaculations, the pressure eventually becomes very painful and I get short stabbing pains, so I have to ejaculate sometimes to release the pressure. If I have any sexual release, I lose energy and I feel depressed. If I don't have sexual release, I feel a massive uncomfortable pressure that drives me crazy, and I feel miserable. Either way I lose. This situation has caused great conflict and even destroyed many of my relationships with women. I have little to no motivation to even meet women until I fix this problem. I have read pages and pages and pages of information on the internet that all say the same thing. I understand what jing is. I understand that I should learn to conserve my energy. There is just one problem. I am unable to accomplish my goal of conserving my energy. I do not know how it is done. Everyone tells you WHY it's a good idea to conserve your energy, but nobody tells you HOW to do it. No matter how many books I read, no matter how many techniques I try, I am unsuccessful. It has caused me great disappointment, frustration, and depression. Learning how to control my sexual energy is something that would make my life 10 times better, but I have been unsuccessful after 7 years of trying. I have spent hundreds and thousands of dollars on books, dvd's, and even online classes. All of them with promises of "energetic control" or "full-body orgasms" or "Male multiple orgasms" or whatever. None of them have delivered though I have done everything they have asked. I practiced every day and I tried all of the techniques they taught. No success. Most of the time, all of these breathing techniques where the energy is supposed to travel up my spine give me headaches. All of the mental focusing, visualization, and breathing techniques have lead to me having massive headaches that sometimes last 48 hours. If I do them for 10-15 minutes, I get mild headaches or no headaches at all, but 30 minutes or so and I am in trouble. I really need a teacher, but I don't exactly see people handing out fliers that say "Sexual Guru Master in need of dedicated promising students". The teachers that do teach seem to be greedy money hungry animals that think a one hour class should cost me 200 dollars. I am not rich and I can't afford to spend 3,000 dollars for a week vacation in Mantak Chia's sexual paradise. Even if I did, I am not confident that he could really help me because his book didn't really help. I want to be able to remain celibate without the tremendous pressure ruining my every waking moment. OR, I would like to be able to express myself sexually without losing all of my energy and feeling those negative energetic sensations. I'm tired of trying to same damn thing again and again and again and again and again with no results. I have spent countless hours trying the orgasmic draw, the big draw, dual cultivation, single cultivation, meditation, drawing the nectar up the spine, the visualized water wheels, anal breathing, chi gung, and everything else related, only to feel mild noticeable energetic sensations in my body. For the amount of effort I have put in, the results of been next to nothing. What should I do? How can I find a teacher? How can I cure my sexual frustration and depression? I am ready for something new to enter my life now. Something that shows me how to overcome all of this. Any and all help is greatly appreciated.

I have no doubt that I have been traumatized as a child, but I wouldn't have the first idea about how to clear that out. I have tried finding traumatic memories and using visualization techniques to destroy them, but it hasn't done anything for me. Apparently I am not aware how to do this. Even if I was, I do not think that a traumatic memory is the reason that I cannot control my sexual energy. Do you honestly believe that that might be the case? If I clear out a bad traumatic memory, all of a sudden my body and it's sexual energy will be easily controlled? Honestly seeing videos like that lie at the root of my frustration. I am so sick of seeing people talk about how unhealthy it is to ejaculate, and how amazing sex without ejaculation is. Why am I so sick of hearing about it? Because I already know about this, I have known about this for years and years, and yet, I an unable to do what they are talking about. It's like watching MTV cribs where everyone shows you how great their lives are, but you can't have any of it. Why do people invest so much time convincing the masses of these amazing sexual possibilities without EVER once telling them in detail how it is done? Is this some kind of cruel joke that all the so called spiritually advanced people play on us? At this point seeing more videos like this just make me so upset. I want to have control over my sexuality, but it doesn't seem to be happening on its own. It seems I need thousands and thousands of dollars before I can bring this into my life, and that just saddens my heart. If there is anyone out there willing to explain how sexual energy can be controlled in detail, I would be eternally grateful. Or if you know where I can go to find a teacher that would be able to teach me without asking for a kidney donation in return, I would also be very happy and grateful for your help. Most of the time when I think of this issue, it just gets me so down. Isn't there a way to overcome this?

How?

Wow. I really want to say thank you to everyone for all the great information in this thread. I am very grateful for all of your help. It took me a long time to absorb all of the information and I am still reading about many different things you have linked me. I contacted David Verdesi about becoming a student, and the first reply I got was about a 3,000 dollar trip to Italy. It's a shame that spiritual knowledge comes at such a high unaffordable price. It's unfortunatel that everywhere I look for a teacher the same locked steel door is waiting for me. I found that link to the "karezza" sight very interesting. I also really appreciate all the input on all of the creative energy. However, I am actually a musical composer and I do not find that creating music takes the pressure away from my sex organ at all. I did pretty serious Tai Chi training for one year. I practiced about 15 hours of Tai Chi every week for a year and I was not able to use my qi gong or anything to control my sexual energy or reduce the pressure in my groin. I feel that this is an area of expertise quite different to the kung fu training I received. Right now I am experimenting with a milder form of sexual exploration as a means of releasing the energy at a more gentle rate, but I am not sure where it will lead. I welcome more discussion, but I am eternally grateful for the help I have received here. Thank you all so much.

I will also be moving to Hawaii soon. I am curious if there are any qualified teachers in Hawaii that can teach how to cultivate jing.

So, I was getting really into all of the microcosmic orbit breathing techniques and I was having really cool and interesting results. I felt like I was making real progress. I think I had really opened up my back channel from the base of my spine up to my head, because I could feel energy pulsing through it. There is just one big problem. I started getting REALLY bad headaches. These headaches aren't just normal natural headaches, it is clearly caused by my practice. I usually get them shortly after practicing (usually the next day) and they build up to an unusual strength. When I was a kid, I could always just go to sleep and my headache would always go away, but with these headaches I wake up and they are still pounding strong. Clearly I am doing something wrong. I am assuming it's because I haven't opened up my front channel and all of the energy is getting stuck in my head. The only problem is when I use my mind or breath, or any technique to try and open the front channel to teach the energy to go back down my front into the dantien, the back channel begins pulsing and I get headaches again. I have tried focusing solely on the dantien with my breath to keep the energy down... Headaches. I tried solely focusing on my feet to ground the energy into the Earth... more headaches. What am I doing wrong? I have stopped practicing all breathing due to these headaches. After I practice a long session of breathing, I am pretty much miserable for the next 2 days because of these headaches. I have hit a serious wall here. Could anyone help me with some advice on how to prevent these headaches? I would love to begin practicing my deep belly breathing again, but I am just dreading these pounding headaches. Any and all help would be greatly appreciated.

I really appreciate all of your informative posts. However, I am still left on the side of the street without a car. Can someone explain to me the difference between using mind and intention? I am grateful for the techniques to relieve my headache symptoms, but how am I to practice without causing them in the first place?

This is good advice. I read about this in a book, but never tried it. The book suggested using something prickly on the spot just beneath the ball of my foot and putting pressure on it. Thank you very much for posting this. I hear what you are saying and all, but what exactly are you saying I should do? Meditate? How does one learn to control their energy without using their mind?

Asking me if I have a teacher or telling me to get a teacher is pretty pointless. I used to do qi gong and tai chi quan every day for 2-3 hours with a teacher over the course of a year. The practices I am currently doing have been taught to me by qualified teachers, but I have never had such a problem with them before. This really started happening recently after my spinal channel began pulsing with energy. Unfortunately for me, I currently live in Yokohama Japan, and I can not exactly go to my local convenience store and order a microcosmic orbit and sexual energy teacher. I can't remember my old teachers holding my hand every step of the way. I also can't remember accidentally exploding my eyeballs because my teacher wasn't there to supervise me at that exact moment. The fact of the matter is that most of our practice is on our own. I came here seeking advice on how to progress further safely and healthily. Any advice would be appreciated.

That would be why I stopped practicing. I am currently unable to practice standing postures due to a leg injury. In my current life situation it is nearly impossible to get a teacher until March. No migraine types I guess... No light in eyes. I supposed I do not feel all that relaxed when I am doing the breathing. The headaches always go away within a couple days. I like your root visualization practice. I am confused though. I thought deep belly breathing was supposed to be safe, easy, and beneficial. Why does focusing energy and moving it through my body cause such headaches?

To create... To love... To feel... To experience limitations... To grow... To evolve... To overcome... To dream... To move beyond... Suffering pushes us so far forward. I was graced with a greater deal of suffering than most early on in life and it has made my life so wonderful. When you look back at your beliefs and what you were 10 years ago, you can see that you are becoming so beautiful. Refine yourself and create something so beautiful. There are no limitations. Quiet your mind and experience what lies beyond.

I just had a very strange and unique experience while meditating... Can somebody tell me what is happening? My entire spinal column began vibrating and twitching. I felt pulsations pulsing up and down at different areas of my spine, from the base of my spine to the back of my neck and to the top of my head. It was not really pleasurable, but not discomforting either. If I had to choose one way or the other, I would say that it feels good. It took me by surprise. I wasn't expecting to have that happen at all. I am really excited about it, but I'm not sure what it was or what is going on. I can still feel it pulsing even now as I am typing this. At it's peak I could feel either the muscles or energy around my spine expanding and contracting all in unison. I'm not sure if it was my muscles or my energy, or something else... When it first happened it was SOoooo strong. It felt like my heart was beating, only it was everywhere in my torso, like one giant heart beading inside my abdomen and head. Everything was kind of twitching/thumping like a heartbeat. None or very little at all seemed to occur below my waistline. I could feel that it was amplified when I breathed into my spine or my pernium or my dantien. Breathing into those areas caused the effect to get stronger... It was almost like my body was doing all of this movement on its own. If this is something bad or unhealthy, it would be good to know. It doesn't feel bad at all though... Anyone know what this is?

You are very welcome... and thanks to everyone for your kind words. I have not written it off to be anything besides "energy". It doesn't matter to me whether it is chi, or kundalini, or prana, or whatever name... I am just going with what feels natural. All I know is that I have been practicing all varying array of techniques ever since I read Mantak Chia's book 5 years ago. I was ever so frustrated with my practice, as I could feel little to no results for such a long time. However, I continued with my practice and never gave up... This was 5 years coming... Finally I have had a breakthrough. I was able to repeat this effect the day after and the day after that. Whatever happened, I finally opened up the energy in my body a little bit. It seems to be enough that I can do it again and build on it. I am having other sensations in my body now as well. I can feel the energy expanding a bit inside of me, causing a pleasurable feeling that is "buzzing" into my arms, hands, head and face. For me, it seems that the key was holding awareness on my lower spine all throughout the day as I went about my life (working and walking around town). I can sense now that the "ming men" is a very powerful place to put your awareness on. That is where most all of my focus goes to. I am seriously ecstatic with my success, though I know these are just the very beginning stages of these practices, I am thrilled about this and it feels like a massive accomplishment for me, as I never gave up for such a long time... Now I will be able to experiment further.

Well, it wouldn't let me message it to you so here it is... If anyone is offended by adult content, don't read this... I began by lying in bed. I cleared my mind and used my willpower to block out "clutter" (Random thoughts). I tried to stay as present and aware of myself as possible. I paid particular attention to my body. All of my awareness went into my body. I massaged myself with my hands, mostly on my chest and abdomen. I focused on breathing into my lower spine, perinium, and dan tien. I didn't focus on just one... I breathed sometimes into my dan tien, sometimes into my perinium, and sometimes into my spine. Whichever I felt like. I don't want to gross you out or anything, but a good portion of this meditation was sexual. If you are offended by that sort of thing or you don't want to read about it, don't continue. ----------------- As I was focusing my breath, I started concentrating on sexual thoughts and I began to get aroused. The thing I concentrated on most was putting the awareness in my body as much as possible, and blocking out all of my thoughts that were not there by my intention. After a bit more self massage, I stood up and sat at my computer. I watched about 3 or 4 minutes of adult films, getting highly aroused (I know it's a crutch and maybe not a good idea, but whatever), all while breathing into my spine and maintaining awareness. After I was fully and completely aroused, I stood back up and laid back down in my bed to try and harness the energy. Right as I laid down, that's when it happened. My whole body was pounding with energy. It was very very strong, but it slowly died down and I couldn't really bring it back up to the original intensity, but the twitching and pulsing of my spine lasted for hours. So long as I kept my awareness on my spine and breath, it continued. If I stopped being aware and "feeling the energy", the pulsing what grow weaker, or I wouldn't feel it as much. When I breathed and concentrated the feelings intensified. I believe it was sexual energy that was causing the Kriya to manifest. I hope that this helps you. Just so you know, I have been practicing this type of meditation about 3 times a week for about 4 months now, and I am only now having this result. I'm pretty excited about it. On another note, I have been putting my awareness on the energy I feel in the base of my spine as often as I can remember all throughout the day every day for the past 3 weeks or so. I feel that this daily practice has had a huge impact on finally getting a result.

Sure... I will send it to you privately... If more people want to know I will post it up here...

You are pretty high on my list of cool guys right now Blasto. Thank you kindly.

After reading all of your replies, as well as your linked threads giving advice, I feel that I have all of the tools I need to accomplish my goal. I want to take the time to kindly thank each and every one of you, especially Apepch. You really helped me a great deal with your post. Unmike, it's ok, I understand you didn't mean any harm. No worries. It was my fault for reacting too quickly to your words as I have had negative past experiences from asking for similar advice on another board. My apologies. I am so excited that I have an avenue now to actually improve myself holistically in the way that I desire. You all really truly helped me out. I can't thank you enough. Best wishes, Lomistick

Hello everyone, My name is Paul and I'm a white guy from Washington D.C. that moved to Japan to teach English. It's a pretty good life out here, but I will most likely move back to Hawaii next year. I am a university of Hawaii graduate. I have had an interest in Taoism ever since I started taking Tai Chi in Hawaii. I haven't been practicing much in the past years, but recently my interest has been re-emerging. I would love to ask some questions to the more knowledgeable people on this board if given the chance. Thank you kindly. Nice to meet you all. Paul

Why is it when you tell people you want get good at swimming, or running, or the playing piano, everyone says "good for you", but when you say "I want to get good at sex", people say you are obsessed or unbalanced? I think sex is beautiful, and having a strong desire to learn more about it is natural and healthy. I am a beautiful person and I have very positive intentions, so you needn't worry about that, though you are free to judge me in any way you wish. I do yoga almost every day so I do plenty of stretching and as I stated in my post already, diet is something that I am already employing. These things don't seem to enable me to have sex without loss of emissions. I am looking for a practice or technique that will enable me to accomplish this. I'm interested in what you said about building up my dan tien, but you did not explain what that means or how to accomplish it. Thank you for your advice anyway.

It's no problem. Usually I am a very humorous laid-back guy, but this is something I am very serious about. It is a goal I have wanted to achieve for around 6 years with no success and I am seriously ready for some kind of breakthrough. I will search for the things you listed. If anyone else has any ideas, advice, or help to offer, I welcome it warmly.

Thanks again for your advice. I understand that you are saying that meditation and emptiness will help me to achieve this goal. I believe that you are correct in that it helps, but I have already delved quite deeply into meditation and though I have undergone some amazing and powerful results, they did not include sexual mastery... I searched for Luke and got over 30 results about magical powers, yoda, and Darth Vader. Which thread were you referring to?