Otis

West Hollywood, the gay mecca in L.A., has a very wealthy and productive population. I don't think there's anything mysterious going on, just a sign of how much work you can do and money you can make, when you're not trying to raise children. Likewise for figures throughout history; they're undistracted, so they produce better.

This reminds me of when I first started riding a motorcycle. At the end of the day, as I lay in bed, sometimes I would be treated to horrific scenes, flashing through my mind, of what could have happened. I see these moments as just a necessary part of really accepting the dangers of riding; I think it would be irresponsible of me not to face (as fully as possible) the potential for danger, to pretend I was safe. I stumbled across a very useful practice about 10 years ago, when I was walking alone in some dark and unfamiliar woods. I experienced little freak-out fantasies, plying my imagination with flashes of all the awful things I've witnessed in horror films. Zombie hands reaching out of the ground, flesh-eating insects crawling up my leg, the whole thing. What I learned is that if I allow the morbid fantasies to play out, rather than trying to turn them off, they quickly resolve themselves, and lose their power over me. It was precisely in turning away from the fantasies, that I was giving them my power. Ever since then, I've sometimes found it very useful to indulge (in great detail) in precisely what I fear the most. My internal resistance was that somehow I was making the fantasies real, giving them power, by playing them out. But my experience was the opposite. The unreal never became real, and the fantasy was revealed as just that, so the fantasy never again had power over me.

I still don't understand. Personally, I don't know why anyone would believe in reincarnation, since it seems like such a wild and baseless speculation. But even if it is the case, I fail to see why it "sounds like hell" to you. What's wrong with it? Either way, don't you think that liberation comes from really becoming one with this life, right now, rather than worrying about the next life, or trying to "get off the merry-go-round"?

There's an ironic contradiction in your post. You write that sloppy analysis is a problem in science; fine. However, the empirical method is the least sloppy process we have, thus far. Parapsychology, by contrast, is usually based on the sloppiest analyses possible. If you think that science isn't going far enough, then become a scientist, and try to improve the rigors of testing. But if you just don't like science, don't try to discredit it with "sloppiness", because all other opinion is based upon far sloppier methods. It's like creationists complaining that Evolution is just a "theory", although their alternative doesn't even rise to that level; it's just wishful thinking.

I'm still wondering why you want to stop rebirth! You have mentioned wanting to "escape this rat race". But if you're seeking freedom, I don't think that you'll find it in the same direction as "escape". IME, freedom comes from 1. taking full responsibility for my experience of the world, which leads to 2. loving the world thoroughly. Any attempts to be elsewhere than I am, puts me deeper into the very trap that I seek liberation from. The only thing that needs to be escaped from, is my need to deny or avoid how things are.

Yeah, it's on the link, but it's not easy to find, cuz those videos are a couple years old already. Here's one. It's a bit long, but you'll get the idea from the first couple minutes. I spent a lot of time, trespassing on railroad property. I did several more vids along the same idea, just exploring new 3-dimensional dance floors that I found out in the world.

Wow! What a beautifully executed form / dance!

In my life, I call it the "invisible observer". I never actually believed that the observer existed (except as a small child, when I thought it was God), but for most of my life, I had this sensation that someone was standing over my shoulder, watching everything I did. Even when I was alone, I was a little self-conscious about picking my nose or farting out loud, because I constantly felt watched. Only recently have I begun to recognize that what I was feeling was not a person, but my fear of being observed. The fear of being observed, of course is an alarm which feels just like: "I am being watched". So, whenever I did something "naughty", then the alarm would sound, and I would feel like someone was watching me. That led to the even more important recognition: that my fear of others' judgment was really an expression of this same fear, being projected onto other people. In other words, when I was by myself, the alarm feels like an invisible observer, but when I'm in public, the exact same fear happens, but it seems to be due to someone else, even though in both cases, it's just something that's going on in my head. It really is just self-consciousness, disguising itself as other-consciousness.

I have lots of video of me dancing in the physical environment (on stairs, bulldozers, etc.), because that was a project of mine, for awhile. But most of my authentic dance practice happens at a barefoot boogie, which is kind of a sacred space, so they don't allow cameras. I do a lot of spontaneous Qi Gong at the beach, and sometimes circle-walking emerges there. I'll see if I can't shoot some soon.

I know this isn't the purist line, but I wouldn't start with anything that bores you that much. It'll only turn you off from the rest. If you need more stimulation to start with, there's no sin in that. Work your way up to it. Start with some moving meditation, walking or at least standing. If you find your way into bliss through an avenue that's already available, then your system will open the rest of your practice up. Just beating your head against the wall of boredom isn't likely to lead you anywhere.

It's something I noticed myself doing for a few years now, but I only recently thought about it in context of (the little that I know about) Bagua. Like everything else, it arose on its own, and I became aware of it, once it had established itself. I do a lot of (Dervish-like) whirling in place, and the circle kind of a grew out of that. I find myself spinning, but not in place; my path describes a circle. Later, I noticed that the circle pattern would evolve to include more Tai Chi-like movements. Sometimes, if I'm facing in one direction the whole time, it comes out a lot like the box step. And sometimes two opposite direction circles get interwoven, and a figure-8 emerges. None of this, of course, is planned, and just shows up on its own. Like all my authentic movement, it is exceptionally joyful to be in the middle of, and feels as if my body is training itself.

Ulises, do you know the poet Mary Oliver? Beautiful wise words, that often reflect and revolve around authentic dance.

I do have a dance / IMA practice that revolves around circle-walking, although strictly speaking, it isn't Bagua. I am interested in learning more about it.

Great shares, Ulises, as always. You are describing my #1 practice: ecstatic authentic dance. My job is merely to get on the dance floor, and allow my body to take over. There's never any "wrong" unless I'm trying to make something happen, or to appear some way. It's just a continual flow of movement, which varies from almost motionless stretch to powerful and wild abandon, depending on what my body needs. Then, when my body is awake and (relatively) integral, it lets me know that it is ready to take partners. And yes, the connection in partnership is an energetic transmission, of sorts, and has been spreading around our dance community. In particular, the partner dance that uses all body parts as contact, and with no expectations, no anticipation, that is really taking hold where I dance. No performance, only process. No 3rd person action (how am I seen?), only 1st person immersion. No defining what it is I'm doing; only listening to sensation. Very very powerful practice.

I don't know if this is addressed to me, but if so, you can see our vids at: youtube.com/inspiredmayhem

Yeah, it's not an easy line to draw. My policy now is to doubt any interior story which involves the contents of others' heads. I don't take hints too well, these days, because I'm determined to do as little projecting, as possible. I ask people to spell things out for me. Of course, the reason why I'm doing it is not because I don't care what others think. It is precisely because I do care. That's what makes it necessary. If it was easy, I wouldn't get that much from it. Yeah, when I started exploring playing in public, I started on my own, dancing all over stuff all over L.A., with my camera on a tripod. I tried to get friends to venture into the social experiment side of things, but most were too shy to try it. Thankfully, I found a collaborator (now my roommate), who was a great cameraman and also a great improv performer. So we've done a whole bunch of videos together, usually interacting with the public in some outlandish way.

Perhaps an addiction to that action? It no longer serves, but it feels so important.

Awesome! I'll have to start working on the song and the mullet now.

Yeah, I think that's the crux of it. Most religions tell people: you cannot trust your self, because you are born damaged goods, so you must trust something that is outside of you. The path ends at dependence, rather than freedom. Whereas I see Taoism as a philosophy of learning to trust the path that appears within me (which happens, of course, to feel a lot like "God"), without having a religious conceptual framework to compare it to. Learn to rely on the genius you were born with, but were trained away from. Religion says: "surrender your will to God" (just as parents say: "surrender your will to us"), whereas I hear Taoism saying: "surrender your will (but not to anyone), and thereby find the rest of you, which the will has heretofore obscured."

I'm with you on this, Zhang. I used to have a great deal of resistance being "seen" when I was vulnerable, like in practice. And so that became a practice, within itself. As I practiced in public, I started observing the dynamics that others' (apparently watchful) presence created in my mind. I realized that "other people watching" was just a story that would come up in my head. When I examined the evidence, all I could see was other people standing and facing in my direction, but my head's story would include what they thought, how I appeared to them, etc. Eventually I realized that I could turn off the "other people watching" alarm and stories, at will. The alarms come back, of course, but they help me see that what I feared was not actually "other people watching", but rather the self-judge, inside my head. I.E. when I noticed others watching, I would project my wishes and fears, through them, back on my self. Every story that I told myself was about them, was really about how I wanted to appear, or was afraid I appeared. Over time, I've pushed that practice, to include facing other self-consciousness alarms. A buddy and I started making "dare videos" for youtube, in which we would do things in public, that scared the crap out of us. The very things that made me self-conscious became the fodder for creation, and adventure. One of those videos is below, of me cross-dressing as a prostitute, and going walking on Beverly Hills' Rodeo Drive; a big day, and an important step in facing my fear.

Yeah, I think that's one of the real advantages of weed, that the pain is still there, but you can slip in between it. It forces you to be gentle and careful with the injury, whereas a real pain killer might dull the reaction to a "mindless movement".

I think this is a very good distinction. I have one small comment: I'd phrase this differently, because all the adjectives it gave the 'animalistic' ego were kinda judgmental of animals. Gotta stand up for our animal friends. I'd say: "your own ego/mind is inherently 'animalistic' and therefore ruled by pleasure and suffering."

I have witnessed, on this and other discussion boards, that occasionally someone surfaces who is flush with the excitement of their recent enlightenment. Because they view enlightenment as an attainment, rather than a process, they now think that they have arrived. Immediately, they begin teaching others whatever epiphanies have arisen, because obviously, the others on the board couldn't possibly have attained the same thing... When I witness that, I wonder: why does this person think that no one else has had the same kind of experience? Why is the assumption that the rest of the board is full of delusional beings, but this newly enlightened one is the only one to get these truths? Which led me to this poll. My hypothesis is that all (or almost all) of the people posting on the Bums have had some experience of satori. That we are each realized (in some fashion or another), and each awakened to (at least) some new truths. For the sake of this poll, I will define "enlightenment experience" as an experience of incredibe internal unity, of clarity, of ease and peace, of humble greatness, that is usually accompanied with powerful epiphanies. Unless, of course, you want to add your own definition, or comments, below (please do).

My main thesis being: we're not special. Those of us who experience kensho (or even satori) are ordinary beings like everyone else. We experience "awakenings", in which previous myths and conceptual structures suddenly crumble into dust, but I think most people have some of that, along the path of maturation. My awakening makes me less asleep than I was yesterday, but it doesn't mean that I'm any more awake then anyone else. To think so is to pretend I know what I cannot: the process and flow of someone else's brain. There is zero point, IMO, to thinking that I am "more enlightened" than someone else. Because when I think I'm special, better or above, I'm indulging in very unenlightened thinking.