Cat Pillar

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Everything posted by Cat Pillar

  1. The Best News of 2011, So Far...

    I only ran a real quick google search for this: http://hackedgadgets.com/2009/12/17/solar-mirror-array-steam-engine-drives-12kw-generator/ Didn't look enough to see if this is the exact one I was thinking of, but I know people have been experimenting with using mirrors to concentrate solar energy.
  2. Return to the 36th Chamber

    I haven't seen the first one either. I loved the second one though...Gordon Liu = win.
  3. Is Capoeira the Supreme Martial Art?

    That's why I train Applied Wing Chun .
  4. Is it just me?

    I quickly fell in love with these forums. Everyone here has been so helpful and kind with answering my questions.
  5. Is Capoeira the Supreme Martial Art?

    Only in the cage. Generally, on the street the man with the gun has the superior art.
  6. Entheogens

  7. For the past month or so my meditation practice has consisted of deep abdominal breathing with mental counting (keeping breaths even.) The actual count varied depending on what felt right at the moment, and the counting had a tendency to get slower (longer intervals between counts). I don't pause in between breaths, immediately after the inhale the exhale begins, and vice versa. The past few days I decided to try switching it up...instead of counting, I'm now instead focusing on the sensation of the breath entering and leaving my nostrils. Even the first time I tried this I noticed an immediate difference in the quality of the meditation. When counting, I was focused on a number of variables, and there seemed to be a lot more mind chatter. With just focusing on the sensation of breath, it seems that it's easier to get pulled away from the sensation, but it's also much easier to come back to it. It's less jarring, seems to flow more naturally. Also, the meditations seem to feel a little deeper - I have definitely experienced the "lost time" phenomena doing this. Would this technique be considered a passive or active meditation? I'm still definitely a beginner with meditation, this is only my second month of serious practice...as someone who's interested in inner alchemy, is this a good technique for me to stick with for now, or would you suggest making some modifications?
  8. Meditation Experiences and Questions

    That sounds really awesome, I look forward to it!
  9. Meditation Experiences and Questions

    Hello Red Phoenix, I'm not particularly focused on experiencing the Golden Flower, but the basic meditation method was what I used to base my current technique off of. I was simply curious if my sensations had any relation to the "center" mentioned in the meditation, but after re-reading the method I don't think they do, unless indirectly. That sounds like an interesting and practical progression. I'd have a hard time with the mental relaxation part though, my visualization abilities are almost nonexistent. I can only hold a steady visualization for a few seconds before it distorts, disappears, or gets crowded out with mental noise. Concentrated focus in general is a weak spot for me, which is why I'm pretty happy with the progress I'm making with my current practice. I seem to be starting to get a hang for focusing again, although I still can only do it for seconds at a time uninterrupted. Actually, let me amend that...in certain cases my visualization abilities are better, like when daydreaming. But even then, things tend to occur in flashes of images, events becoming aggregated into "packages" of sorts, sort of like what I assume happens in the cases where people have dreams that seem to last an inordinately long amount of time. Years of wasting hours upon hours every day playing video games has pretty much shot my ability to concentrate...I tend to go into a trance when gaming (or sometimes when reading) and my mind just kind of daydreams it's way through the experience, making up stories or details to add to the experience and chase after whatever emotional sensation is desired at that particular time (power, sex, admiration, etc...) Fortunately these days I'm much too busy to spend more than a few hours a week gaming. Sort of unrelated...do you have experience using entheogens for inner journeys? I seem to recall you mentioning it in a post somewhere, but I'm not sure if it's a mistaken identity. ------------------------- sykkelpump, I'm not sure I understand the distinction between "watching" and "feeling" the breath.
  10. Addictions and Compulsions

    In my relentless quest to understand and transcend "myself" I have come to admit that I have several problems concerning addiction. I am addicted to smoking and food. I've seen some posters here mention that following a 12-step program not only helped them with alcoholism, but had many spiritual benefits as well. I'm very interested in learning more, and was wondering if anyone could provide some good resources (I'll be googling as well, but sometimes references are more efficient and higher quality than search results ). Also, any advice or insights about approaching addiction and recovery programs from a Taoist point of view would be welcome.
  11. Meditation Experiences and Questions

    I had a very interesting meditation experience last night. While focusing on the sensation of breath moving in and out of my nostrils, as I developed more focus I noticed that I began feeling more of my nose as a whole. There was also a new sensation, and it felt like something...solid, but not solid (don't know how to describe it) inside of my nose. In a way, it seemed like I could sense my awareness resting in that spot, almost like an anchor point of some kind was being developed that my awareness could hone in on. (Out of curiosity, could this be related to the "center" talked about the in Golden Flower Meditation method on J.J. Semple's site, for those who are familiar with it?) However, more profound than that was what I noticed after the meditation. When walking over to my friends house, I continued to practice the deep breathing I use in my meditation, and I noticed that my sense of smell was much sharper...in addition, I felt very content and was able to enjoy just walking outside much more than I normally do...I noticed that none of the anxiety or stress thought patterns were actively running in my mind. Happily, this noticing and acknowledgment of their absence didn't trigger their return either. I noticed that just simply performing the deep breathing increased my presence in the moment, sharpening my focus on the now. It's nice to see some more obvious effects of my practice coming out. The rest of the night was very calm and enjoyable...I was not caught up in patterns of worry or stress.
  12. Addictions and Compulsions

    Nanashi, Yeah, I've read some things that were less than favorable about the 12-step programs, but it does seem that a number of bums here have had good success with it. -------------------------- Blasto, Thanks for the info on the Buddhism-based 12 step program! I'll dig into that more when I have some more time. Just got handed some new responsibilities at work, it's cutting down on my Tao Bums time. That's one area I'm blessed in, it's that my job allows me to browse when it's not busy. -------------------------- surfingbuddha, That sounds like a pretty neat idea, have any recipes or plans you can recommend? --------------------------- manitou, Wow, great breakdown of the 12-step process, thanks much! There's a lot to take in there, but I think I could pull it off if I dedicated myself to it. As far as the personal character inventory, I'm not afraid of digging up the undesirable stuff...I'm already used to a certain extent of that as a result of self-inquiry. Also, thank you for sharing your personal experiences with this process involving your Dad...I'm glad that you got to repair your relationship before he died. I would have to use Tao or a similar concept as my "higher power," I wouldn't be comfortable working with any other paradigm. I'll definitely be needing to revisit your post a few times. That first step alone I think could lead to a goldmine of insight. It's already revealing things I need to examine in the light, things which evoke reluctance and resistance...a good sign that there is substantial potential for growth. -------------------------- windblown, Congrats on your 2 years! Unfortunately, my schedule is so crazy I don't think I could make time for going to meetings. I've had to fight and get crafty just to make room for my spiritual pursuits! I'm pretty sure if it weren't for meditating and cannabis (with the emphasis on meditating), I'd already have a nervous breakdown or two under my belt. I've certainly come very close in the past. And a note; I don't feel I'm addicted to pot, as I don't really get cravings for it, even when I've been without for awhile. I recognize that in pursuing a 12-step approach, not going to meetings may be a significant handicap...but I gotta work with what I've got. This is something I'm trying to build on. I wish there were more hours in the day, I don't get to study the TTC or other Taoist texts nearly as much as I would like. It would definitely be Wu-Wei for me...I'm generally not comfortable with the usual context of "God." I feel a much higher affinity for Taoist approaches than any other. ------------------------------ I've never gotten the hang of smoking cigars...I always want to inhale =\ ------------------------------ KCHooligan, I already know my employer has smoking cessation programs, but I'm not interested in patches or gums or anything like that. The support aspect might be worth looking into, although again I don't have the spare time for meetings unfortunately. That's good advice about still taking the time to go outside for a few minutes! That's half the joy of cigarette breaks anyways.
  13. Addictions and Compulsions

    Never tried the blacks before, I'll have to give those a shot. Thanks for the suggestion!
  14. Addictions and Compulsions

    I love American Spirit cigarettes! Don't always buy them though, probably because of the addiction! That's a good step though, I'll start getting those again. I know about all the nasty crap they put in manufactured cigarettes, but...I don't always think about it when buying or lighting up. There's that unconscious behavior again!
  15. the weak yin male cannot find balance

    Hahaha, no wonder I feel so much better after training Wing Chun! Part of our warmup is doing Hindu squats! Still can't do the full forty, I'm at around 25 right now... I only get to go to actual class one day a week because of my work schedule...but I never feel more alive than I do during and after class. I do the warmups and form practice at least three times during the week so I can keep up in class, and I have noticed that I'm slowly feeling an increase in vitality. Nothing beats the blues like a good beating! Non...why do you care so much about how others will view you? Do you think someone is going to come up to you while you're taking a walk and challenge you on why you're walking? Or will they psychically know that you're not doing it for some "manly" purpose instead of "just" for health, and then bombard you with psychic derision? The sooner you stop concerning yourself with the judgments of others, the sooner you will experience freedom and self confidence. When you're out and about and feeling the harsh judgmental gazes of those around you...are you sure it's not just your own self-judgments projected externally onto others? What makes you think they even care what you're doing in the first place? Now, I am definitely guilty of often not taking my own advice here...all those questions are asked because for longest time it was exactly how I approached the world. Constantly in fear of the judgments of others, of being seen as "weak" and thus in danger of being attacked (physically AND verbally). I've become aware of these aspects and am working to transform them. It's slow and hard work...but I have faith that the rewards will be well worth the toil, if I can just get myself to do the toiling part. But...simply becoming aware of what's occurring psychologically is a reward in and of itself. Once you recognize the patterns, you can do something about them. You can't control the world around you. But you can sure as hell do something about how you react to it!
  16. Robert Bruce does also suggest meditation, especially in his Astral Projection material. I never got very far with Bruce's system, because I never practiced it diligently. However, I do think his tactile imaging is a GREAT approach to energy work. I did see some results from that the few times I practiced it. As a long time member of his forums, I have read a number of testimonials from people who've had success using his methods. There's no one method that works for everyone...there's no "ultimate" technique that stands over and above every other one. Different people have different needs, and some people's needs seem to be quite adequately met by Robert Bruce's techniques. I'm not happy with his new marketing scheme either...but it may just be a case that he feels it's the only way to achieve his dream of building a physical research institute. That takes a lot of money, and he's going to need to get it somehow.
  17. Alan Watts

    I read "The Book" because of this thread...got some great insights from it! Loved the way he wrote and explained things...
  18. The After Death Question

    Some mornings I resemble that remark.
  19. I spent an hour trying to write up this long and introspective post about certain psychological and emotional hurdles I'm faced with. But each time I would get near the end, have the wording just right to properly convey the situation...I'd think to myself, "You're being a whiny little bitch. Stop it. Put up or shut up, your complaining won't do shit. No one else can fix you, it's all on your shoulders." And then I'd delete the post. This happened a couple of times. I believe this voice every time I hear it. I base my trust in this voice on the belief that I am 100% responsible for any suffering I experience, and I am 100% responsible for dealing with it. Am I delusional for thinking this voice is telling me the truth, or is it the clearest thought I've had all day? The voice says I should delete this post too.
  20. Unhelpful judgment, or a taste of the truth?

    Mind telling me where the switch is?
  21. Unhelpful judgment, or a taste of the truth?

    I see what you mean here, and understand your warning. I've slipped down that slope before, so I can see the sense in your warning. I have often believed myself to be hopeless or an idiot, but I've made very good progress in the past few months moving away from those unhelpful self-imposed limitations. I spent over ten years in despair, I'm pretty wary of anything that might lead me back there. ------------------------------- Thanks for the well wishes! You may be right about me simply trying to finish the job, or carrying on the work of the critical voice. The voice doesn't sound like him, though there are connections. I think the psychological model may be the easiest for me to work in. And I think you're also spot on with your observation about the alarm function having become corrupted. The voice DOES act as if it knows better, is wiser and sees more clearly. I can't really recall having that kind of sensation...normally when I'm alone, if I'm not distracting myself with entertainment or meditating, I usually just withdraw inside. -------------------------------- Thanks for the hug and the intention, fellow Texan! I didn't giggle, but it was nice and relaxing. Bit cold and rainy for a warming nature walk today, but...getting out in nature more would definitely do me some good. Growing up I spent a lot of time running around and playing in the forest, and it's definitely something I miss.
  22. Meditation Experiences and Questions

    Sort of like exercising then, progressively building up the workout. The last part, I understand what you mean about clinging creating knots, but what do you mean by "karmic" in this context? Hmm, okay. So let the space come naturally then, and just pay attention to it when it does. Actually, I've found that thoughts tend to creep in more when I'm counting than when I'm not. The intensity of focus is harder to maintain on a sensation than an active task of counting, but while counting my mind is sort of forced to remain active, and seems to attract more "sticky" thoughts. Thanks, XieJia! I've always had trouble keeping up with journals...but it would probably be really valuable to me. Something to add to my list of things to change. I never thought about it in that framework, but that makes a lot of sense concerning split intention. Hmm, that's a very interesting thing to contemplate. I'll have to consider that for awhile.
  23. The After Death Question

    Very nice answer, thank you! I like the advice in the last paragraph too, sounds like a practical approach.
  24. Unhelpful judgment, or a taste of the truth?

    I think the dynamic is a little more complicated than that, but I do agree with the basic premise that actions are more revealing of your true values than what you say about your beliefs. Ah, I didn't fully pick up on that context in the post, thank you for clarifying. WHACHOO SAYIN' BOUT ME!? hehehe, just kidding... I see what you're saying here, and your warning is duly noted. It's not that I don't acknowledge the role that others play in my situation, I just don't see the use of "blaming" anyone for it. Sure, my parents played a big role in helping to develop and nurture many of my psychological issues, as well as all the school kids that picked on me constantly. What good will blaming them for it do? Much better to simply refine and reframe my understanding of these situations, and cultivate compassion for the circumstances and events that contributed to their contributions to my circumstances and events. As you say, we're all interconnected...in the same way that I may not be fully at fault for my circumstances, neither is anyone else. Although, I think that's probably the point you're trying to get across? Your emphasis is well-placed. I've no idea how to access these other realms and I'm not sure I'd want to if I could. Unless maybe it was for a short visit, hehe. I agree, pretty much anything when taken to an extreme becomes harmful.