InfinityTruth

I don't think that's the case here. I know you might just be using an example, but I'm not trying to save anyone. I've had past lives that don't indicate that either. I once wrote a blog post called, 'To save the world save yourself and the world will be saved.'

Everyone has had different experiences and has different standards(Live your own standards), which gives a variety of different opinions of drugs on this thread alone. I think that's why you have to listen mostly to yourself on this subject over anyone else. Or you'll be thrown all over the place.

It's very interesting. They say that real life is often stranger than fiction. I definitely agree. There's always something new to do or an art to master. Thank god for infinity, or we'd all be bored off our asses.

Yes, I absolutely do not blame others completely for the shit going on. It just sucks that this keeps happening to me. I have seen that part of it is definitely the default programs I'm running in my head that built up over time. When I'm stoned I'm no longer running those 'awkward' programs that create this reality. I'm my old self somewhat. I'm more comfortable. The problem is not only becoming aware of it, but also changing it, and not changing back when I get attacked.

I like the idea of being dedicated to growth over all else. I had thought about that a while ago. It makes all the negative lose its power. Because anything negative you can grow right out of or change.

I like the idea of finding a reason to live for myself. I have never thought of that. I'll have to make a list or something.

It's illegal where I live now. I used to want to try it...I've heard that negative experiences are very common with salvia though. Mushrooms is something I would like to eventually try though. I've heard it's less dangerous than taking tylenol, and with a smaller dose you're a lot more likely to have a positive experience.

I have a couple of friends actually. I can't really be around them for long unless I'm stoned(weed has been my medicine or breath of fresh air...I see life from my old perspective when stoned). I have no sense of humor otherwise(I get so nervous), and absolutely have to leave the situation or make things really awkward for everyone, and then I get attacked. I'll definitely try some of those job suggestions. I've tried alcohol before, but I'm very cautious in my use with it. I lose a lot more control over myself than I do with weed.

I have to get a job soon. I'm too hated (I don't say that lightly...I'm the definition of a pariah. The only thing is I've been enjoying solitude the last 3 years) to get a job with people(They'll attack me and I'll feel shitty, and my life will be shitty again), so I'm severely limited in what I can do. Alone I'm happy as a clam, but I have no money coming in and soon I will be broke and powerless unless I get a job with people.... I was fine living my life the way it was. When I had money coming in from the government. Without money though I have to find a place to work...with people because there's nowhere else.... I just don't think I can go back to all that hatred on a day-to-day basis. Fuckin kill me. A year is too long to wait.... I have a month. Hopefully this mood subsides, but idk.... I feel like I'm being pushed into a corner and there's no way out, but scewing myself either way. I will not be happy in a people environment.

I made a new discovery in myself today and there are one things at play that cause it for me: 1. I noticed after being around a lot of people that I don't know, that I have 200% more mental chatter when they leave. If I'm at peace (Which is usually with myself or family or people I know) then I have a lot less mental chatter going on. How do I control the mental chatter?

I was actually practing letting go for a while. Worked amazing, I'd actually feel high most of time after I got a release. At the time though I gave it up for some reason unknown to me. I'll have to get back to it.

If you're always trying to get something or get somewhere else, you'll forget about what is right here right now, and forget to enjoy your life which is in this moment. This whole society is always trying to get something out of you, and you've been trained to try to get your slice of the cake. There's always something in the future that you're trying to get and no rest in between. I realized that in myself today. When I would meditate it was always in hopes of getting something out of it in the future. I would never just genuinely sit down enjoy the moment and not try to get something out of it. I was always trying to learn a calmer mind or something like that. There's always something in the future wanted.

Don't even ask how I found myself on this video.

Haha, a paradox

Beautiful day out in the woods and everywhere else I found myself today. Absolutely the best day I've had in a long time. The thing that made my day so great was the animals and an experience that I had with them. I felt so much appreciation from the animals and for the animals. To kick it off I saw this baby toad moving along by the side of the road. So I figured I would pick him up and throw him in the water (rather violently what I had in mind...before my epiphany), well I picked him up and at first he was all feisty and jumpy. Then I just let him sit on my hand relaxed like and we just sat there for about a minute or two. I just finally got to a point where I just thought he could leave whenever. I wasn't going to interfere with his life. It was kind of cool just to sit with him. It was a cool experience. Then I went to my car to sit there while I listened to the birds. I saw this butterfly that seemed to want so badly to come by me, but he didn't want to go in my car (I don't blame him...easy place to get stuck for bugs). After a couple of minutes I got out of the car and started to follow the butterfly around a little. I was pretty stoned and I was just loving every moment of life. It was like that appreciation for everything type of high. Everything was awesome. I had fallen in love with living. I'm still not over that and I hope this feeling stays. If not I'll find a clean way to bring it into my life. If there is a true type of spirituality it is to just be genuinely appreciative of life. Entitlement is a big problem in today's world. Anyway, I walked out and followed this beautiful beautiful monarch butterfly. I wasn't expecting anything. Just having a good time sharing vibes with the bugs (I had deer flies all over my head...which I forgot about later I was so awestruck). All of a sudden the butterfly flew onto the tongue of my shoe and sat there for damn near over 3 minutes. I tried not to move an inch not wanting to disturb him. So eventually I tried to see if he would crawl onto my finger and I accidentally scared him away briefly. I was so scared I had upset him. I felt SO much love for this creature and felt SO much love back from him. I forgot to mention he was just gracefully flying around past me pulling off these cool stunts. I could tell even before he landed that he was curious about me. It was kind of windy and he found his way over by the bottom of my shorts and landed there for about 1 minute. I got kind of a better look at him. He had beautiful pronounced white spots on his black face and body. A moment that I wish I had had a camera, and I did in my car, but I didn't want to scare him away going to get it, so I stood still. Anyway, the wind picked up and he flew off again. Then he slowly made his way to over by my shoe like he did the first time. He was SO brave. The braveness yet gentleness of this creature just amazed me. He seemed kind of hesitant, but you could tell he was curious about me. So I waited and he landed on my shoe again(This took a lot of patience) again very slowly and cautiously. Just gracefully making his way to me. No rush. Then the wind blew him off again. I figured I would sit down and try to get him to land on me like that, but I immeditiately felt like he wouldn't be comfortable with that (Nor was I...I was afraid of accidentally crushing him...he was my absolute bestfriendin that moment and I kid you not) so I stood up and thought that I had lost him and was kind of sad. Just then I see him whoosh by me all happy-like. I was so relieved to get to see him again. Then once again he made his way over to my shoe. It was hesitatively, but he still did it the same way again. Brave little creature to walk up to a giant. So we sat there a while sharing vibes and then it was time for him to go for his final flight from me. At this point I was sobered up. I was just so awe struck at what had happened that I had sobered up in the process. I kind of followed him around. Not to get him to land on me. I felt like four times was as lucky as I was going to get and I was okay with that. I just followed him around and observed him sitting on trees and plants. He was still in my vicinity just didn't want to land again. I was happy to be there watching him. He had such a gentle/loving vibe. I've never felt love from an animal like that. It was life changing in how I will deal with animals from now on.

Yeah, I find it has a lot to do with circumstance moment-to-moment. That was just a purely beautiful moment. I've worked a little with detachment. I'm always hopping onto the next thing though. So much stuff available to do. Perhaps I'll repay it another visit this time for longer. I've been focusing lately on trying to stay in the moment. For some reason I feel like it used to be easier. No idea why.

Not because I like their hateful message (God no) or agree with it, but because they have the courage to keep going on while the world bombs them, and attacks them and criticizes them endlessly. Ultimately flipping the world the middle finger and continuing with their thing, despite a huge amount of pressure to stop. They really are good at not breaking mentally, and must really believe in what they preach. I notice they have the bible practically memorized. What's the difference if they protest at a funeral? Is it really that disrespectful? If no one fed the troll the troll would starve. Maybe I just like taking the opposite opinion of the majority. The more I listen to people attack this family the more it sickens me, and sounds more and more like a drone-like opinion that allows them to keep doing what they do. If there were no fight they couldn't have a mission. They aren't bad people. They just have an out of balance belief system that makes them behave in less loving ways. Take away the beliefs and really it's the beliefs that person held that you hated. Not the person. The ones who are the hardest to love need it the most.

I see it now when it's put that way. Why would you give that to them though if that's what they want?

Did I mention he lives on an island that you can only get to by boat?

Just log on. Every time I log on I see one. Does the site have an anti spam robot?

You need the 6 P's of life my friend! Prior Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance (I got that from my hilarious/crazy uncle)

This is the only current thread on the 'latest' board that is not spam. I find that a bit alarming.lol. nevermind, there's only two right now. It was worse earlier.

really...? So I'm the only one annoyed by it? Okie Doke.

I agree. Did he die from getting run over by a tank?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That's not that surprising to me though. Rednecks are really patriotic. What would be astonishing is if they showed up to a black funeral to defend a black dead guy. Show me that and I'll be amazed.