Unseen_Abilities

I agree. My memory is pretty good (I take Gingko Biloba, bro...) but I'm talking about highly traumatic experiences here...as said before though, there's no real way to prove anything 100%. I did see a Psychologist closer to the time this all came up and he basically pussy-footed around the issue, but that could have been because I was still somewhat in shock at the time. We move forward.

You've got a point, Skydog...I had an okay relationship with them - it's never been great, I never felt they understood me at all, but it wasn't terrible either. No I can't prove it 100% but I haven't been able to shake the feeling, things add up (or to be fair, I think they do)...I've done research, certain symptoms, certain things get triggered when looking at certain information, but it could be a past life or something like you said. They weren't my parents, but a few years ago I was in contact with people who I know were into ritual magic (one of them at one point told me straight up he'd been performing Dark Rites with a group in parks - there is no way this is a false memory, it was just a few years ago) so maybe it has something to do with that. So no, I can't totally prove anything and I'm moving anyway so I'll have time and space to contemplate.

So, regarding this topic: I'm now quite sure what I posted about did actually happen. Despite what anyone says to the contrary, enough things add up for me to have now reached this conclusion and feel sure about it - I've done more research, more questioning, I've had enough sleep for long enough now to be well rested and that's how I feel...there's been no more trauma and this is all coming from a much more grounded place. I've got a new place to live that I'm moving to soon. Thanks to the Tao Bums who showed support in this very difficult situation - It's truly appreciated. Unseen_Abilities

I am stronger and tougher for having experienced terrible misfortune. I am now strong and tough for life.

I spent a while looking at different religions, even up until quite recently - nothing fit properly, so I've given up on any "religion" other than my own lifestyle, and I'm freer and better off for having done so. De-conditioning from the World is an ongoing task, however...

I'm looking to pick up some Iron Rings for the solo training I'm doing - can anyone recommend a specific brand/online store that sells good quality/well priced rings? I've got fairly big arms. Thanks

I was referring to the Iron Rings you might find being used in a Kung Fu school...

To promote conformity is to con people. Conform = Con, Form = Forming a Con. Mass Conformity (trends and so on within masses of people) = Forming a Con on masses of people (the Mainstream, sure, but I've also noticed this within Subcultures of people too - groups that are normally perceived to be "non-conformists" - Goths, Hippes, Ravers, etc). What does it mean to be truly Authentic? Unseen_Abilities

Now that you mention it, I did notice the "A" for "Anarchy" in your signature, Marblehead. I agree.

Amongst other things, I came across the Maxims of the Oracle at Delphi, and put into practice "Know Thyself" - those two words can lead to many questions, and ultimately answers as well.

I'm still a free man though

I've been there too (your first sentence) and I think you're right - No one who embraces the system wants angry shouty anuses complaining about it and fighting against it. It just pisses them off. To just step back from it and do your own thing is the best approach I think - this can still be difficult (from an energetic point of view) but on a long-term scale this approach is probably more likely to change things.

Cool, giving guitar lessons is a good way to make some extra $$$ - I've done it before, I'll do it again. I agree that's the right attitude to have. I've learnt to care more about money (and treat it with more respect) than I used to and lo and behold, I'm getting more of it now. Fuck "real jobs".

I've started designing and selling shirts

What do you do for work by yourself then Rara?

Mature as f*ck, mate. Ehhhhhh

I am becoming a "mature and responsible adult" in my own way (a good effort considering the life I've had), but what does that even mean? Who's to define what "mature and responsible" is? Krishnamurti: "It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." U_S

skydog I remember reading somewhere else (sorry, I don't recall where) that you channel spirits when you talk...you should watch out for that I think - It shows in the way you type. I think it's a good idea to express your own Spirit, not let random spirits talk through you.

Psychic letter? Return to sender.

Cut down the lines in stale bread, make cirkels from them and call them bagels to shock people.

Now, after getting over habits of scatteredness, I find myself experiencing the benefits of Sexual Transmutation more easily and obviously now. The people who have said being horny can make you crazy are completely right - you just have to do and act in the moment you're experiencing crazy to overcome it. If you have bad habits this can be difficult. Also, if you're not used to a very high level of productivity (personally, I'm mainly doing this to get things done...) then work on developing beneficial mental patterns at the same time, or you won't know what to do with yourself when the energy picks up...I like to walk around the City with a notebook and write things down in an abstract way, to give you an idea.

Autumn SongTwo dice gives seven - brings the luck. I love the way a black cat looks as it slinks by, My mind like fire - Autumn song. Come again, create your story... Understand all, belong to none, think what you like. What I Will is where I'm going – ever sure and always knowing, Back and forth - quick and slowing, For good or ill, for life or kill, my life is mine, this life I Will. Come again, create your story, Back and forth from quick to slowing - ebbing, flowing, Ever sure and always knowing. Mind like fire. I love the way your bad luck looks as it walks by, I pick it up and bleed it dry. Sweet fruit, once sour - strikes the hour of your doom, Sweet flowers now adorn your tomb. Come back to life and tell your story. Autumn songs - My mind like fire, Belong to none, think what you like, Sweet flowers, now they line the tombs. For good or ill, for life or kill, this life is mine, my life I Will. Come back again, create your story. END.

A question for a question, a riddle for a riddle; What separates riddles from questions?

Thought #1: If you're in your early-mid 20's and you think you know the real meaning of hard work, you're most likely kidding yourself. Thought #2: If you're an Artist, try and stop caring about the level of fame you reach - you'll be better off for doing so. Unseen_Abilities

Oh, I know. I'm definitely creating that for myself, every day, in real-time. However, purpose takes a while to deepen. Also, what is it to act free from influence?