Lozen

not outside my head, but inside it... like once it happened when the guy was literally talking and i both heard him talking outside my head and saying something different inside my head, which made me all jumbled and confused because i didn't know which to respond to. again though this was right after getting out of JAIL though so... which is right what is going on in my heilkunst timeline thingy so it may be related. actually now that i think about ti, when i first got to the holding cell i distinctly remember like three women asking me questions all at once and how disorienting it was to try to answer them... which i was trying really hard to do. and before that during the actual "scene of the crime" having memories that didn't happen... like i sware i saw my friend get put in the ambulance but then when we heard what happened afterwards realized my brain made it up. hmmm.

i suppose it could be a higher voice, except that it made little sense and i can't remember what it said!

It has only happened to me twice. Once was after I got out of a holding cell and I was exhausted out of my mind, and I was staying at this guy's house (I lived an hour away and the trains weren't running any longer... I hadn't planned on risking arrest) and I literally heard him talking in my head AS he was talking out loud. It was pretty bizarre. This was ten years ago. Then this morning I heard my boyfriend in my head, but when I responded aloud he was like, "huh?" because he hadn't said what I'd heard. The weird part about it was that it was like I knew what he'd said was in my head but couldn't stop myself from responding. It was so weird. Also sometimes I hear the phone ring even when it isn't ringing. I'm just hoping I'm not schizophrenic or anything, and in reading The Origin of Consciousness in the Breakdown of the Bicameral Mind it seems like everyone USED to hear voices all the time way back in Homer's day and the Old Testament etc. and thought they were gods, so of course some brains have evolved more than others but it's in our blueprint I think to hear voices. So I looked up schizophrenia and affective disorder and do not seem to match the symptom picture. In the book it sounds like people hear voices and such when they are under inordinate stress. I feel pretty balanced but I was kind of a basketcase last night and do get unbent and cry hysterically for no reason (which my super logical Midwestern boyfriend really digs...NOT...) and do have school starting tomorrow so I guess I'm under SOME stress but it doesn't feel bad enough to hear voices... And then why didn't I hear them more LAST year? And Karen has some interesting theories and I'm also waiting for my Heilkunstler to reply. My last remedy happened to be around the same event where I heard voices and the next one is for weed so... OMG I am getting so paranoid about posting this here ever since that drunken pirate chick lost her teaching cert but whatever. Anyway so my boyfriend didn't think my hearing him talk when he wasn't thing was weird; he thought I was just tired. Which would be a great justification if I hadn't just woken up from eight or nine hours of restful sleep.

I love B vitamins, but they are synergistic and you usu. need all of them...unless you have a B12 deficiency, which usu. doesn't happen unless you are vegan.

LOL. Well it was some protest but someone through a fire extinguisher at a cop, and so they blocked off the street and decided to search everyone on their way out. This was in London where I guess that's legal. SO a bunch of the crowd had drugs on them which they immediately ate. Now we were trapped there for several hours. I remember peeing on the sidewalk (my friends were my shields) and then a bunch of people came up to me asking for things like bandaids and ice. I guess taking a leak designates one as a medic. Anyway so by the time we got out everyone who had drugs on them was tripping balls. and I was trying to help this kid get home so he wouldn't get arrested. But he kept stepping off the bus I was helping him get on. It was a weird scene. Where were his friends??

I never did special K but I did try to help someone who was on it get on a bus once when he insisted on sitting in the middle of the street. it was a weird scene. I guess horse tranquilizers never appealed to me.

I wrote an article with the basics of raw milk and a lot of resources to check out. You can read it here: http://www.dirttime.org/2008/07/10/some-like-it-raw/

Anyone else on verses 19 or 20?

Okay, since you all are health freaks like me, I was wondering... For the longest time, I refused to wear real deodorant and instead used all kinds of natural hippie deodorants, you know, Tom's of Maine, deodorant crystals, Nature's Gate, etc. Even used apple cider vinegar for a while. So some of these work in the winter when I'm not sweating but none will cut it when I'm biking to work in the Arizona sun. I was wondering if anybody else has had this experience and if there's any natural deodorants that actually work? I will admit that I've been using Degree, and it bothers me because it's an anti-perspirant. I've heard that this means you will stop sweating and your body will fill up with toxins and it's bad news. But then a friend of mine pointed out that you still sweat other places, so it's okay. Hmmm!

Tom's didn't work for me.

I gave up on eco-friendly and I now use Degree. LOL.

You're welcome!! I read Sam Harris and got all depressed; reading Alan Watts saved me! Praise the Lord!

You know, I think Alan Watts explains this more clearly than Ramana did... "It must be obvious, from the start, that there is a contradiction in wanting to be perfectly secure in a universe whose very nature is momentariness and fluidity. But the contradiction lies a little deeper than the mere conflict between the DESIRE for security and the FACT of change. If I want to be secure, that is, protected from the flux of life, I am wanting to be separate from life. Yet it is this very sense of separateness which makes me feel insecure. To be secure means to isolate and fortify the "I" but it is ust the feeling of being an isolated "I" which makes me feel lonely and afraid. In other words, the more secrurity I can get, the more I shall want..." -Alan Watts, the Wisdom of Insecurity

20. He who sees God without seeing the Self sees only a mental image. They say that he who sees the Self sees God. He who, having completely lost the ego, sees the Self, has found God, because the Self does not exist apart from God.

uhhh... not sure where to start with a response.

I'm not vegan/raw (which is what made my hair fall out) and I do get the occasional white hair, but I just pull them out for now.

Anyone else?

I still don't really get 18 but onto 19... Those who don't understand the source are always arguing between destiny and free will. I guess this is the false dichotomy thing... I've actually had this argument an awful lot, arguing for free will, because I WANT it to be true, to think we have choice... But then eventually I decided it didn't matter... if we have choice I get to present more choices (to my students for example), if we don't have choice and it is all based on heredity and environment then all I need to do is change the environment (by mentioning "choices"). But anyway I am not sure what he means by seeing SELF as the source of destiny and free will, but I guess doing that will make you free from both...but he's saying you can get un-free too. Like, get caught up in old mindsets or what he'd probably call false dualism.

There's also the Shambhala Center: http://www.tucson.shambhala.org/ There's another sangha I've been to but forget their name, they are in the lineage of Thich Naht Hanh. As far as Taoism, check out Providence Institute; they've got some stuff. Taoist Yoga and every once in a while classes/workshops open to the public: http://www.providenceinstitute.com/ And then there is BodyWorks; they occasionally have workshops: http://www.bodyworksstudio.com/bwhomemain.html There are two acupuncture schools that may be of help. Also go to Seven Cups!! http://www.sevencups.com/community/tea-house/

I read that ages ago when I was researching lyme, I think in a Barbara Griggs book but not sure.

Lyme disease actually has the same spirocyte as syphilis--scary, huh? The best site I have found is this: http://www.anapsid.org/lyme/

18. To those who have not realized (the Self) as well as to those who have the world is real. But to those who have not realized, Truth is adapted to the measure of the world, whereas to those that have, Truth shines as the Formless Perfection, and as the Substratum of the world. This is all the difference between them. I think this is like the last one, sort of. Like, everyone realizes they are in a body but some realize they are more than just their body. Everyone realizes the world is real but others realize truth is more than its body, the world. Or something.

Oh. Steve hope you feel better. Here's 17: To those who have not realized the Self, as well as to those who have, the word 'I' refers to the body, but with this difference, that for those who have not realized, the 'I' is confined to the body whereas for those who have realized the Self within the body the 'I' shines as the limitless Self. So if you are aware or awake or whatnot you realize that you are more than just your body. This almost sounds Christian; like he's talking about soul or spirit or whatnot.

only one way to find out put on some gear and hit the mats