CLPM

Hi there, So I've been troubled with a thought recently. Some will say, 'Stop over-analysing', but on this particular thought I can't. I was wondering if anyone here could add to the discussion. Basically, more and more evidence shows our conscious mind can only understand 5% of what happens in our subconscious mind. Our subconscious mind being responsible for the majority of our behaviours and decisions. So, you might see where this is going, how exactly does one know the real reason they make a decision? Let me put this into personal context. I was given a good problem to have. Career offers, two to be precise. Both career paths I am really interested in, but both different. I spent a lot of time obsessing over what was the right decision to make. Then, once a decision was made, I started questioning the true motives behind my decision. Was I making a decision for a wrong reason on a subconscious level, and just not realising it? So anyway, what I'm saying is, how do you make good decisions and how do you trust the decision you made is a good one? Sorry if this is long winded and confusing. Thought it might be an interesting discussion though .

Yo, I'm aspiring to be a professional screenwriter/director or novelist. I love creating realities and stories that are close to my heart. Who else is with me? Anyone here write? Like creating stories?

I've been thinking recently about the importance of music in daily life. The importance of listening and understanding the scientific effects it has over the mind and mood. For me, there is also importance in playing. Closing your eyes and playing away for me has always had very similar effects to meditation. Music has always been a way of conveying emotions more powerful than words. Words aren't always specific and powerful enough, but music notes are. At the same time, the crappy repetitive music most people listen to now days is very unhealthy. It's simplicity allows for people to play it 24x7 a day and not give their mind any quiet to think. I don't think there's any specific point I'm trying to make, just observations.

Well...I guess this post was going to come up eventually. Here it goes... When I was 11 I left school. I had physical illnesses that lead to mental illnesses (this is quite common in fatigue related illness). The school kept forcing me (via the police) to go into school even when I was really sick. My school was full of gangs and violence. This obviously gave me 'school phobia'. I was 11 remember. To add to this there was a poor family situation and it boiled over and exploded. I was too anxious to ever go back to school again... When I was 16 I tried entering college (British education system)...which failed when there weren't enough teachers for my course. The above might all seem quite simplistic. But it's really not. What my lack of education has meant is that I've been completely isolated from society and people my whole life, with severe mental consequences. It's gotten to the point (i'm 19 now) where loneliness is literally going to swallow me. I work for my dad too, since nobody would hire an uneducated kid. I'm trapped. Out of society. Feel completely out of touch. I want to connect and feel accepted by people, but there's no way to get 'out there'. I live in London too. Anybody who's lived here knows it's the most antisocial place on Earth. It's not very easy to meet people. Eh, complaint over. Just dunno what to do.

I believe in balance. There is a balance that needs to be struck in life with everything, most importantly people. Spending too much time with people is as unhealthy as spending too much time alone. I can spend time alone, but spending too much time alone becomes very harmful. Balance comes into play here too. Masturbating uses up energy, but sometimes sexual energy needs a release (and it's unlikely I'm going to come near the real thing any time soon). I think not enough masturbation is as bad as too much masturbation. Sounds kinda cheesy, but sometimes my most creative thought has come after masturbation because impure/anxious energy is released. --- Thanks everyone for the responses. I will give some of the posts here some thought. Hopefully I fill this massive hole in my life.

My interests include Cinema and Writing. This is pretty much what I live for. And on the subject of alcohol and drugs, the reason I stayed (try) and stay away from that stuff is because I feel they diminish my ability to do the things I love. WRiting a script when intoxicated is impossible. The problem here is quite simple: 1) The British Film Council was shut down last year, which has been a massive massive blow to the UK's film industry in terms of jobs. 2) Nobody will make a script from an uneducated 19 year old. My plan is quite simple, work (at home for my Dad unfortunately) until I have the funds to showcase my talent on short films. But until then, I need to develop a social life before going completely insane. It is very difficult though, because, for example, it's been a few months for me to leave the house. Leaving the house and talking to people can stir anxiety up beyond my control. I hate that. I hate it because I know if I can keep my anxiety under control, I can come off as a sociable person. I just need a source of association with other people. I happen to be Human, and Humans happen to need other Humans sometimes. Being deprived of this source is terrible. Thanks very much for the responses everyone. It is much appreciated.

Thank you for the advice. I can relate to things being easy said than done. Anxiety can be stronger than any rational emotion. It's hard to stretch out. But your advice is good nonetheless .

A response helps. I'm genuinely not the type of person to complain, but every so often the isolation takes control and I don't think normally. I hate making excuses for myself, but I don't think the fact that it's very hard to connect in this city helps me at all. I'll keep fighting for what I want, but extreme loneliness is a very destructive force.

This really moved me. I can't explain why, it just did. Writing or 'art' has always been about showing my visions and my realities to people so they could be moved too. We tend to take the pleasure away from the moment all too often. This I can answer. I can't be a director now because I don't have the funds to buy my own camera, let alone fund a film. And nobody is going to provide funds to an unproven 19 year old. In this aspect, it takes time to be recognised by others. That is the sad truth.

I haven't read many books. Just enough to know the basics. I think the most important thing for any writer is life experience, because writing without life experience is like writing without ink. Unfortunately I don't have too much of that . Looking for a break into the film industry here I can hopefully pitch a few scripts. Struggles though, because the films I love aren't really made too much anymore.

I agree to an extent, however I believe political leaders do represent their people. If society is greedy, then their politicians will be greedy too.

Through some searching I found this thread, and I think it is interesting. I am interested in music and interested in film. I want to try and make a living out of one of these, because there is nothing that makes me feel the way these activities do. Fairly confused as to what I enjoy more, music/composing or screenwriting/directing, but this is besides the point. I think all art is benefits from being conscious and aware. You will write better stories if you are more aware, you will be able to express your emotions through music if you are more conscious of yourself. And I think a person benefits from art, because art is what makes your soul grow. Along the lines of something Kurt Vonnegut said...creating something is very powerful.

^ It's people who elect them. Ultimately people can't blame politicians when they elect them.

I think alcohol in small quantities is good for you, and I enjoy the occasional beer too. I've never gone overboard with alcohol, but I've never been shy about drinking it.

I have always been politically interested, but I've found the more I've gotten involved in politics, the more harm I do myself. The world of politics is one that is completely OPPOSITE of what the Tao is. The world of politics is a religion of clinging and controlling. The Tao Te Ching is political, and Taoism has a political history (as mentioned in another thread here), however, I think being politically involved can be very harmful to self development.

Thanks for that

Thanks. It's nice to know I'm not the only one.

Hello there, Decided to register here because I enjoy reading the discussions on this website. It can be quite stimulating. Regards,

I won't hide the fact that I'm an absolute loner and I find it almost impossible to relate to anyone. I am a young person in the Western world. This means that my peers are too busy checking their Blackberry phones every .5 seconds and comparing the size of their penises (size of their breasts if you are female) to have meaningful conversation. Talking to a random person is met with extreme suspicion. I don't see anything odd about talking to the person next to you on the train. But no, they look at you as i you were a ghost. It seems as though the only time it's acceptable to talk to people is if you are at a club with loud music, and you both hve lethal amounts of alcohol in your system...only if the intention is to go to bed with each other later. And even if you get a conversation going, what is there to talk about? I like 60's European cinema, the majority of people my age couldn't sit for 2 hours and watch something. I like books, the majority of people my age can't read. I don't mean to sound egocentric. I have genuinely tried to fit in with the average person, I have genuinely tried to pretend I can associate with them, but eventually, their need for superficial media and superficial interaction fills me with anxiety. I'd rather live in a village somewhere in some poor mountain region. I'd rather live in a place where there is community cohesion rather than suspicion and anxiety about talking to your neighbour. I'd rahter live in a place where people have real problems, like, 'Crap we've run out of food', than, 'OMG I HAVE TO VOTE ON THE X FACTAH!'. Immature rant over.