manitou

Well, I'm guessing that AA took a lot of wisdom from the Daoists. If done earnestly, the light does finally emerge. 40 years of doing this earnestly has finally paid off. I am finally seeing the benefits. I am now a seer because of the inner journey that I've taken. This was nothing I was looking for, it has just gradually happened. The 12th step, and it's one that is worked for life. It's no longer a step for me, it is my nature now. Yes, this happened many years ago. You describe it accurately. It affects me in no way any more, other than to reach my hand out to help when appropriate. There's the prodigal son, I guess. Yes, recovery from anything that has required the inner work is cause for jubilation. It ultimately leads to the I Am consciousness, as you described. What an exquisite post, freeform. BTW, I love your name. Freeform. No structure needed any longer. Your mention of martial arts and TCM does answer the question for me as to the Daoist route. I see that a young boy can start in MA to be cool. And down the road he finds out that the character building he's received in MA training is a precursor for the real path that lies ahead. The inner journey. The true warrior. I really appreciated your beautiful post, ff. The beauty of all paths meeting within metaphysics, the nexus - is something that I am grateful for daily.

If your friend is conditioned to believe that life is two dimensional and doesn't understand the deeper dynamics, her whole consciousness would be undiluted within the grief, changing her outlook. If someone understands the metaphysical workings of life and who is undergoing an alchemical change of his own - as many of us here seem to be doing here - your grief doesn't grab your totality, because your vision of 'reality' is different. We sort of become one of those asses with human heads. Something different altogether. Maybe a better metaphor could be found......

What you have described here is the exactly the same thing as working steps of recovery. But your description of the process, your succinctness and obvious understanding of what you're talking about is just about unparalleled in anything I've previously read on this site. (Bow to you, my friend) I am thrilled that you mentioned the alchemy as well, as that's what this all is. Once we've peeled the onion and get down to the light, it's as though there is a chemical change that happens throughout the body. I say this metaphorically, as I'm no scientist and I don't know if this is an actual or not. All I know is that there is a fusion of sorts that happens when the layers have been removed, as far as we are capable of self-honesty. I The path inward is a painful process, when our sacred beliefs about ourselves are threatened. It's harder than anything in the world to develop this kind of courage. The courage to look someone in the eye, maybe someone you've been at odds with for years and years, and apologize for everything that I've done to add to this condition. It goes unsaid that the other person added plenty on their side too - and in fact he may have even started the problem. It doesn't matter. It's not his onion we are peeling, it's ours. It's our blockage we want to get rid of, it doesn't matter that your foe can now consider himself the winner, if indeed he even noticed at all. This is truly courage of a particular kind. And if ego prevents someone from doing that, peeling the onion - then I personally believe that the result will be a halfway enlightened one, should their left brain ever make it to the desired result. The other half of the brain will still be asleep; all knowledge would be left brain knowledge, learned from others. When in fact, real knowledge isn't discovered. It's realized.

All I'm talking about is my own personal experience. the imminence of alcoholism forced a reckoning, and the inner work was essential to stay sober. I believe that getting to the place where we feel that we're 'good' is a lifetime work. All I know is that I'm one heck of a lot better than before the inner work. I talked to my brother yesterday. I told him that for the first time in my life, I felt 'content'. I've never felt content before. Not even when I was married for 35 years. It's a marvelous feeling! Brand new for me. The highs aren't as high, the lows not as low. In fact, they're hardly there at all, come to think of it. It's just contentment with a smile on my face. I didn't take a particular path (other than alcoholism), so anything I've attained has been through self-realization. As in, Who Am I, really?

I think it's all one and the same. I don't think true enlightenment can happen without the self-development (I would call it self-realization). Some of us here have gone through recovery programs where the steps had to be worked (I'm sure you're familiar with these). To get sober or clean (I've been sober 40 years) one has to find as many personality defects as one possibly can. It's an actual 'inventory' of all the emotional stuff that gets in our way. Once these blockages due to past occurrences are removed, that particular channel is cleared. How to actually remove blockages to growth? Very often amends have to be made. One has to become very humbled and try to rectify harm that we've done others in the past. To someone who's walked a spiritual path for a long time, this is not a big deal. To someone who's walked the path of alcoholism or addiction (or any of the isms), owning up to our misdeeds and the bad dynamics we had created is absolutely overwhelming. Especially since there was probably not much of a self-image to begin with. But the strange thing about the path of recovery is that sooner or later it's no longer the path of alcohol recovery - it's the path of spiritual recovery primarily - and more than a few recovering ones have walked their way into enlightened thinking. As I see it, enlightened thinking (or enlightenment) is nothing more than being in INNER awareness of who we really Are. And then the responsibility of living up to our self-image becomes the path. And then it becomes primary nature, in the long run.

Hi Damla, You obviously are no stranger to the path. You seem to have very good insight. I think you will be a wonderful addition to this community. One thing that folks insist on, is to not post when you're high. And also to try to stay on topic. Please read this entire thread, and see how beautifully it flowed up to this point. You came in with a huge splash and got everyone's attention. Now is the time to relax, go with the flow of the conversation, and add to this thread when you've got something pertinent to say. I'm glad you're here - I think you'll really enjoy the discussions. But it's not about getting attention.

The truth about people. There's no right or wrong here, but it's all perspective. This is the perspective I choose. a) That person I am judging over there is actually Me. We are cells of the same body. b) If I had been born when they were born to their parents, with their conditioning, I would do exactly the same thing that they are doing now. c) I can only recognize it if I have it inside of me too. Otherwise I wouldn't know what it was. d) The black pupils of all of our eyes are the connection. The connection with animals, people, insects. It's all the same Consciousness but filtered through different brains. A man's, vs. a rodent's. We project our conditions from the inside out. e) There's no Good or Bad, nor Evil or Saintly. If I ask a soccer mom what is evil, she could say the fellow down the block who sells drugs to kids. If you ask the fellow down the block 'what's evil?', he'd say 'the SOB who ripped off my drug money last night". It's all in how we choose to see it. All of it. f) I seem to have a choice. I can choose to see things through the eyes of love (which does ultimately become the only practice left) and look at the dynamic behind the person or situation - and know that it's all part of the great Becoming, whatever that will be. I know this because the action of the Dao is reversion. g) It's a choice to view life as if the Divine were living within. It's an enlightened choice for us. The enlightened choice. IMO

If some cleavage can be seen, go for it. I'm still stupefied that mine is so low now.

Surrendering to life seems to make it happen. I often think I feel like a stick floating in the ocean. I wonder why you feel like a ball and I feel like a stick. Strange. The attachment thing comes into play here too. The fewer emotional attachments we have, the less we're at the mercy of the emotions. Some would call me hard hearted. I don't cry over a lot of things. My emotions are no longer on my sleeve. In fact, just about the only 'emotion' I feel these days is appreciation and gratitude. And a deep soul appreciation for things of beauty. The thing that made the difference to me is the ever-dawning awareness that we are all one entity - and that awareness, with practice, comes more and more often during the day. I like to remember that the Dao considers us as ceremonial straw dogs. The rain falls equally upon all. I think the horribly deep loss I felt when Joe died - which lasted for 2 years - set everything else into a different perspective. Almost as though his death used up any emotions I had left. I'm not sure there are any tears left for anything. It's all good.

I think it's a process, or at least in my case it was. Once I determined where the dynamic started (usually as a result of my dad's anger and violence), there was indeed a lengthy period of blame. Once I saw how it started, the blame was huge. As I got further along in my development, I made the realization that we're all victims of victims. Dad did to me exactly what was done to him. And to his father. And to his.... So then the blame turned into compassion. I wish dad were still around so I could see him through my compassionate eyes and see him for the injured little boy he remained through life.

I know of one solution. Use the negative feeling as a vehicle for finding out why there's a negative feeling. This can come in an instant flash as a childhood memory - something that created the initial reaction - a very formidable reaction that is your faux comfort zone. If it's your faux comfort zone, then the dynamic will manifest repeatedly in relationships, in business dynamics. Something that continually makes you feel 'beaten', for example. Easy enough to find those memories. But until the root of the problem is found and understood, the dynamic will be repeated continually until it's recognized. Once in awareness, the separation begins and it doesn't take long at all to feel a change within. Usually within a few weeks. Another way would be to make a list of every negative personality trait that you can think of, then when you have a glass of wine or a bowl at the end of the day, you can sit back and think of one trait at a time - maybe start with resentments you've been carrying, or jealousy, or whatever it is that gets in the way. Be fiercely honest, and don't be afraid to look under your emotional rugs. If you're honest with yourself, the negative mindsets become a choice rather than a reaction. Another way would be to start with judgements and biases. Don't offer excuses for yourself, just look underneath it and see where it started. I was brought up by a racist cop in L.A. and my imprints are deep in a dark way. I know it's there, and I'm guessing that everybody in the world has the imprints of someone else. I know it's there. I act to the opposite. I do this in various ways. Judge not lest you be judged. If you are judging others at all - even a stranger passing you on the street - you will feel equally as judged as the amount you are giving out to others. If someone is feeling self conscious or judged, look immediately to the recent judgments you have made. We recognize these things in others because we are these things. There really are active things to do. It's just that people don't usually want to do it until their backs are up against the wall. Feelings are messy.

No thanks dearie. I already drank the cup behind the bathroom mirror. I had to nuke it for a few seconds. You mean that's cleavage, not my butt?

This is interesting, with the moon in the background. A tarot reading might show that the subjection of the cup to the sword is an illusion, a deception. Along with the smoke. The true north would be found with the cup, not the sword.

Bums are like this. They can be real contrarians. I woke up this morning and mine had moved, so it's now in the front. Using the commode will pose a bit of a challenge. I wonder what his did?

Yes. A hard block of limberger works particularly well. I do wear perfume on those days, tho.

"As for your so-called individuality, that is nothing but your personality still seeking to maintain a separate existence. Soon you shall know there is no individuality apart from My Individuality, and all personality shall fade away into My Divine Impersonality. Yes, and you shall soon reach that state of awakening where you will get a glimpse of My Impersonality, and you will then desire no individuality, no separation for yourself; for you will see that is but one more illusion of the personality." The Impersonal Life - by Anonymous

Where do you find this stuff??? I do have them, with the exception of the miniature lapis lazuli. My are carved with cheese. Is that okay?

I guess this is why it is said that a shaman is never alone. The awareness of the aliveness of everything. I talk to my car.

Which shoes should I wear?

YESSSS! Thank you for the connection and the reminder! Although I don't remember so much the inorganic deities as much as him being in that huge cavernous tunnelley thing reminiscent of a brain or a mushroom. Yes, he did stay a little long at the fair, if I recall. Thanks again, 'Apache'! Excellent advice, I believe! An added boost is a perfect way of seeing it. I do have mental CC images that might pop in when necessary. And you're right, it's integrated in there with the Dao. I'm so glad you remembered my CC roots.

Well said, IMO. And that is the most difficult part of the practice, as I see it. Eliminating the fear and the Thou Shalt Have No Other Gods Before Me thing. This shedding process can take a long time. That's a very good point about the numinous being real and manifest. It takes it 'out of the distance' and bring it into the home. I think that the wonderful thing is that every single aspect of life (seemingly good or seemingly bad) is all a part of it; and realizing that consciousness is the one thing that makes me feel absolutely centered and balanced. It does stand to reason that deities representing different qualities or conditions would be most helpful if there were multiple templates from which to model one's own behavior - particularly at the beginning stages of the path. But let me ask this. Does one integrate all these templates at some point in time? Is there value in hanging on to them? To me it doesn't seem like there would be, once the Consciousness is found. But maybe there is, and if hanging on to a particular deity helps someone correct their own actions or lead to higher thinking.

Sometimes when I see something particularly beautiful, I talk to the essence within me, fully in awareness that it is looking through my eyes to see that which it is.

My thinking gets caught up in the fact that there are different levels of manifestation, as far as the body density of an entity would go. Seeing water as an ocean or a mist, it's all H20. Perhaps the desire of the heart or mind to visualize such a being (linear time being an illusion) does have an actual presence aside from mind. Once I took a picture of my husband hiking ahead of me on a trail - and once the film was developed, there were 15 orbs around him.

Believe it or not, this is not dissimilar from Christian Science healings. The 'god within' is always spoken to, directly from the healer to the healee. It is as though the prior conditioning can be tricked to change from an emanation of sickness to an emanation of wellness.

It's the only answer. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? Maybe.