Hey Stupid! So You Want To Get Married?

[SheepishLord]

(This is really for American Taoists--It isn't what to do in life, it's what NOT to do! What you do in your 30s determines the rest of your life. Spend your time building independent sources of income and keep women at arm's length. In other words: date them, fuck them--but don't marry them! Don't live with them either because that is another set of laws. Don't fuck them on your property either or they could take it. Don't date single mothers because you will inherit responsibility for their children if she can prove you formed a bond with them--which she will. If you ever get a girl pregnant and she refuses to abort, then tell her fine she can pursue you for child support in the courts but you will certainly not marry her and you will never speak to her or the kid again. Chances are she will abort when she realizes she has limited power. If not, you take the minimal hit.)

 

If I could offer a young man one piece of sage advice, it would be this:

 

Don't get married.

 

Don't do it. Come the divorce, as come it probably will, the courts will systematically shear you of your children, your house, and huge amounts of your income for twenty years. Don't do it. It isn't worth it. Nothing is.

 

My saying this usually brings, from women, cries that I'm an extremist or woman-hater. No.

 

The problem is not women, but the courts. Men can behave every bit as reprehensibly as women, though they go about it differently. But the judicial system, which is politicized to the gills, utterly favors women over men in divorce cases, without remorse, decency, or concern for children.

 

Should you doubt this, read, before you pop the most foolish of questions, "From Courtship to Courthouse", by the divorce lawyer Jed Abraham.

 

Writes Abraham, "If you're like most men, you're married, or you hope to marry some day. You think you deserve to live happily ever after, but if things don't work out that way, you'll get a civilized divorce and move on. You'll stay pals with your ex, and you'll see your kids as often as you want.

 

"You have no idea what you're getting into."

 

And you don't. Not the faintest freaking clue.

 

A few facts from Abraham:

 

"The odds are 50% that your marriage will end in divorce. The odds are 70% that your divorce will be filed by your wife. The odds are 80% that your wife will get custody of your children-plus child support, alimony, and/or a hefty chunk of your property."

 

That is how it is.

 

Yes, I know: You don't think this applies to you. Cup Cake loves you. She would never behave in such a way. Think again. You have no conception of the hatred that divorce engenders. Men are callous; women are mean. When a family breaks up, when a life dreamed of disappears in flames and emotions go limbic, women are not the kinder sex, and certainly not the more rational. And Cup Cake will have the absolute upper hand, with the full power of the state to help her express her dissatisfaction with you.

 

Abraham: "If your wages are not withheld and you fail to pay your child support, the State will garnish your pay, slap liens on your property, intercept your tax refunds, report you to credit agencies, discontinue your driver's license, suspend your professional and business permits, hold you in contempt of court, put your face on a wanted poster, throw you in jail, and deny you food stamps. But if your ex doesn't spend that very same support on the children, the State will do. . . nothing."

 

It gets worse. There is, for example, "imputed income." This means that your child support will be based not on what your children need, not on what you earn, but on what the court decides you could earn.

 

Don't do it.

 

If you love Cup Cake, live with her. Be kind to her. Be loyal to her. She may be as nice as you think she is: Many women are. Buy her roses. Just don't marry her, or have children with her. If the laws were even-handed, marriage would be an admirable institution. The laws aren't equal.

 

But it's the kids she'll use, should things get nasty, to tear your guts out. If you're sure that Cup Cake won't do this, you're crazy. True, she may not. Not all women do, or not to the same degree. But you won't know until it's too late. And the courts will do anything she wants.

 

Abraham: "Your ex will warm to calling all the shots. She may cancel your visitation now and then. If she's truly mean-spirited, she'll go much further. Under the cover of her court-appointed role as sole custodian, she'll systematically sever your relationship with the children. She'll badmouth you to them. She'll schedule their extracurricular activities during your visitation time. For good measure, she may accuse you of domestic violence and child abuse."

 

Think "joint custody" is the answer? The courts won't enforce it. What are you going to do-sue Mommy? The kids will hate you for it. Do you believe in pre-nups? The courts ignore them. Read Abraham. It's all there.

 

Then, says Abraham, there's the killer: "More efficiently, your ex may simply move with the children to a distant community, with the law's acquiescence."

 

Kids are the crunch, guys. They hurt. And she will know it, and use it. The courts will help her. At bottom, the position of the courts is that the children are her property, like furniture. Judges don't care about you at all.

 

Ever drive away from what used to be your home, with your daughter of four streaking across the parking lot, yelling, "Daddy! Daddy! Please come back!"-and you can't?

 

Ever have your little girl of four say, "Daddy, can I get my birthday present early?"

 

"Why, Pumpkin?"

 

"Well. . . after the divorce we might move, and I won't see you again."

 

That's what you are in for, guys. Don't do it. You'll be suicidally depressed, miss your kids to the point of desperation, be almost frantic-and the courts will make sure you can do nothing about it. The ex will probably enjoy it.

 

That's the reality. Don't believe it? Talk to men who have been there.

 

Why do women do these things? Not because they're evil. Cup Cake is probably a perfectly decent woman in her dealing with the rest of the earth. She'll do it because she hates you, which is the normal outcome of a divorce. She'll do it because she can. She's furious because the marriage didn't work, which will be entirely your fault.

 

And the law gives her every incentive: She will get the house, the kids, the child support-and she knows she will. If women knew they had an even chance of not getting custody, of having to pay child support, the divorce rate would drop like a prom dress and joint custody would suddenly mean joint custody. Women love their children as much as men do.

 

But that's not how it is. The courts encourage divorce, and they rape men. Get used to it. "The odds are it doesn't pay for you to marry and have kids."

[MatthewQi]

Plato,

 

So what are you proposing as a practical alternative? And what for those of us who have already been sucked into the trap? First there is love and sex and love and sex. And then there is the "honey this" and the "honey that" and one does the obligatory dancing. Then they start holding sex over yer head and manipulating, full force. All the while you keep depleting your jing and you are on the treadmill to hell. A total sucker for temporary satisfaction because you don't know anything else...

 

UNTIL... you start practicing retention. Now the tables turn. At first she is pissed. Really pissed becuase you dont' respond to the "if you want some, you better..." and then after a while when homey doesn't play that game anymore, she gives up and realizes that she wants sex too. Now you make her shake and beg for more. Now homey is well, realizing his homeyness. Now, she looks at you differently. Homey is actually respected in the household. And gradually, homey, becomes the Master.

 

Help all men find liberation my friend!

 

Smiles,

 

Matt

 

PS. Sean, ah, are you going to put any wife blocking software on this site????

[RON JEREMY]

DA WHOLE POINT IS, IS MEN PRACTICE RETTENTION, THEY HAVE NOTHIN TO LOSE WITH WOMEN. ALL SEX WARS HAPPEN BECAUSE MEN GIVE UP THEIR SEED.

 

WHEN YA CAN FUCK FOR DAYS DUE TO YER MASTERIN RETTENTION, WOMEN WILL STICK THEIR ASSES UP INTO DA AIR N CALL YA *GOD*.

 

BUT, EVEN IF THERE BE NO WOMEN ARROUND, YA'LL WONT GIVE A FUCK N BE PERFECTLY HAPPY WITH YER PURE SELF, REFININ DA LIGHT N TRAVELLIN TO DA FAR STARS O' DA SKY.

 

ONCE YA CLOSE DA CIRCUIT, DA FUCKIN WORLD CANT DO SHIT TO YA.

 

RJ MAHASALAMI

[MatthewQi]

Ron and fellow practitioners,

 

I actually have had it for awhile but have not come so forcefully out wit it! I can not disagree that retaining the seed (really the energy) is vital. However, at the same time once deeper layers open up, I can not say that it really matters but I still practice retention. It is like this for me...on the physical plane I fully understand the benefit. On the spiritual plane that has opened, nothing matters. The Source is and it is beyond, beyond

 

It is funny (or not so) becuase I had a conversation with a friend (non practicing and no clue) the other day about the games that go on in typical American relationships and how the women take full advantage and withold sex to suit their own agenda. He was like so thankful because now he knows there is way to restore balance. He intuitively knew that you have to be complete inside FIRST!.. I let him borrow my personally signed David Twicken book "Spiritual Qigong" with all the HT formulas (no sex practice or Winn H&E Alchemy) up to Sealing of the 5. I tell you the truth, the more people that culitvate the better! And all women should seek culitvation as well. This is not about superiority of one sex over another, but about the harmonization of yin and yang to restore Primordial Heaven and TAO!

 

So... sorry to change the subject but, what is your secret when you do a scene? I mean, how do you blow a load and retain the energy? or is that why you do not do porn (as much) anymore?

 

Inner Peace,

 

Matt