Controlling sexual desire

[C T]

I have been working with someone who does this, she heals patients every day but only heals herself about once a month, its no real drain on her as she channels energy to heal rather than use her own.

Healing energy does not 'reside' like a reservoir inside a body. To think so is self-deception.

 

Engaging in the process of finding out or the gradual realization of what 'self' and 'body' really is, together with investigation into where source energy can be found, interesting answers will begin to emerge over time.

 

Healing the self then takes on a whole new meaning.

 

[Maddie]

Great topic for a new thread.

Yea I was contemplating how many various topics have come out of the sexual energy thread, but I guess that's what generative energy does haha.

[三江源]

If you think about it the scientific method is a combination of hypothesis (making up theories) experiment, observation, conclusions (deducing a rationale) and publishing (telling stories).

No, I wasnt referring to theorising with a motive, which is what science does.

 

constricting what is , with what you think it is, is only called 'telling stories' euphemistically.

[hydrogen]

Healing energy does not 'reside' like a reservoir inside a body. To think so is self-deception.

 

 

Exactly.

 

One never gain or loss any energy. It's just a conversion of one form to another.

 

The smart buddist monks figured that out a long time ago. From the Heart Sutra "It doesn't born or die, it can't be polluted or purified, it can't increase or decrease".

[Maddie]

Ok so I noticed again that when ever I feel desire (though the frequency of times seems to be lessening) that it just stays in my heart (making it beat fast and hard) but it never gets past my heart anymore it seems. I don't feel arousal in the genital area, but heart pressure. So I just sit up with it for a while like tonight and do the heart sound.

 

I guess I don't understand why its all in the heart now? Isn't that odd?

[voidisyinyang]

Ok so I noticed again that when ever I feel desire (though the frequency of times seems to be lessening) that it just stays in my heart (making it beat fast and hard) but it never gets past my heart anymore it seems. I don't feel arousal in the genital area, but heart pressure. So I just sit up with it for a while like tonight and do the heart sound.

 

I guess I don't understand why its all in the heart now? Isn't that odd?

 

yes it's still desire though - in "Taoist Yoga: Alchemy and Immortality" it's called "False Fire of the Heart" -- so it still has to be emptied out to create the chi energy or else it gets wrongly routed in the meridians.

[Maddie]

yes it's still desire though - in "Taoist Yoga: Alchemy and Immortality" it's called "False Fire of the Heart" -- so it still has to be emptied out to create the chi energy or else it gets wrongly routed in the meridians.

 

Yea this seems to be one situation where Vipassana seems to work pretty good for me. When this last happened a couple weeks ago I observed how, and where I felt it and after a while it sort of dissolved and that was when I was talking about all those funky qi transformations. So I reckon I'll do that again here soon.

 

*In fact upon further consideration I remembered that the last time I found myself in this same situation I had also been doing quite a bit of Samantha previously, and I had to apply Vipassana to the specific situation that arose. So what I'm thinking is happening is that Samantha makes a lot of "space". Any vacuum likes to be filled. So I think that with the space created by Samantha that what the Buddhists label as the latent/dormant aspects of the min that are always there but hidden in the subconscious come to the surface and become known to the conscious.

 

It makes me think of what you said yesterday about how as we cultivate our consciousness become more and more aware of what is actually in the subconscious. Apparently Samantha is effective in allowing that to happen.

Edited May 18, 2013 by dmattwads

[voidisyinyang]

 

who needs qigong when you have Chinese culture instead? haha.

 

Schmaltzy Western nostalgia music.

 

Escapism. Sentimentalism. Disempowerment.

 

Bourgeois consumer unit love.

 

Still Taiwanese drama is not the sleezy vamp powermongering of U.S. soaps. haha.

 

Well I mean you get vamp powermongering but it's just not as sleezy. I suppose it's getting there fast.

 

But the Taiwanese dramas are definitely HEART-centered passion and not just trying to get into a man's pants. haha.

 

I like Michelle -- oh and that short stocky female lead -- I wonder what her new one is....

 

Rainie unfortunately is past her prime now - her jing energy is lower. haha.

 

Still I watched all her dramas like a devoted teenage puppie dog fan.

 

Yeah Amber Kuo

 

http://sugoideas.com/drama-2010/channel-x/

 

This one was kind of hard to get through but still good.

Edited May 18, 2013 by pythagoreanfulllotus

[voidisyinyang]

http://www.dramafever.com/drama/4103/1/Love_Forward/

 

Yeah so basically these are girl fantasy dramas -- everything is "cute" and the males just serve the females.

 

haha.

 

It's technofemnism.

 

Westernization in action.

 

No need for Taoism which is ecofeminism.

 

Amber Kuo's last drama was an environmental one so it had just a hint of ecofeminism.

 

Now she is trying to repeat Rainie Yang's biggest hit drama when Rainie Yang played a tough girl -- since males like that more - the forward dominatrix female. haha.

 

This one has a definite lesbian current -- reminds me of Mullohand Drive - I went to see that in the theatre and when the lesbian love scene played I almost blew a load right in the theatre - I had to do some serious reverse breathing and then I just left the movie in shock - disgusted. haha.

 

An afternoon matinee - only an old couple there besides me.

 

O.K. I'm watching this comparing it to the Wing Chun kungfu movies I was watching last night - the female lead refuses to leave her father as he is being killed and then she barely escapes.

 

These females are pissed and crying because the male is out working but does not contact the females.

 

The Wing Chun father was telling his daughter to leave to go train in martial arts. She refused to go to watch her father get killed....

 

Anyway so it seems maybe the female role has changed -- in the Wing Chun female she risked death to serve her father and in the Love Forward drama the female is pissed that the father is not giving enough attention to her. haha.

Edited May 18, 2013 by pythagoreanfulllotus

[Maddie]

Before my clinic shirt I did an hour of Vipassana in order to look into this desire issue. So when I sat down in meditation I began by observing my heart as this is where I felt the most sensation. It was as though the desire was emanating from there. I felt a lot of sensation in my heart and it was quite strong.

 

After a little while of observing my heart I felt this sensation go up the left side of my neck and into the lower left quadrant of my head, much like it did a couple weeks ago when I was going through this same thing. I'm assuming this heart sensation radiating up the left side of my neck to my head is part of the internal channel of the heart meridian that goes to the brain/upper dan tien. I definitely felt my caroitd artery involved and I'm assuming my left vagus nerve? So now I'm feeling my heart, neck and part of my head all pulsate at the same time, all connected.

 

After this goes on for a while I then feel this sensation radiate down my arms to my little and ring fingers where the heart, small intestine and san jiao meridians run to. So now I'm feeling all of the above at the same time. I'm not trying to make this happen, simply observing it. The only part of my heart meridian that I did not feel was the internal branch that goes down to the small intestine.

 

Next I then notice more detail about my heart. I notice two points in my heart that seem to be particularly strong in sensation which are the right atrium behind my third intercoastal space in my chest and the bottom of my left ventricle behind my left scapula in the back. I don't know why I thought this but it seemed like to me that these we the "poles" of my heart (though I'm not sure which one was positive and which one was negative) and my hearts qi field seemed to emanate from these points.

 

Anyways at this point I'm simply observing these sensations but aside from noting where they are and how they feel there is really nothing of spectacular insight going on. But then after some more time of observing all of this, how it feels I begin to uncover the delusion that my heart shen is buying into. So I see that my heart is convinced that seeking after these cravings and desires will bring happiness (thus the heart is pursuing its emotion... joy). Why my heart/consciousness does not seem to realize is how this craving and desire actually produce suffering as the Buddha said. Though my heart/consciousness is just operating from the conditioning of my subconscious with out realizing what's really going on.

 

So its is at this point that while I'm aware of my heart craving and desire that I mentally play out the scenario in my mind of how this craving was really just frustrating me and not making me happy at all. It was especially at this point where I felt how much doing a bunch of Samantha the past several days had helped as this took a great deal of focused concentration. After focusing on how desire really made me feel in the present as opposed to just being lost in the desire itself all that sensation I felt in my heart and its meridians seemed to subside quite a bit.

 

I can tell there is definitely more to do, but it was nice to see how simply observing the processes with in me and trying to see exactly what was going on rather than just to blindly go with it really helped. I plan on doing a few more of these Vipassana sessions today and hopefully this desire thing will be brought into a greater degree of balance.

[Maddie]

 

who needs qigong when you have Chinese culture instead? haha.

 

Schmaltzy Western nostalgia music.

 

Escapism. Sentimentalism. Disempowerment.

 

Bourgeois consumer unit love.

 

Still Taiwanese drama is not the sleezy vamp powermongering of U.S. soaps. haha.

 

Well I mean you get vamp powermongering but it's just not as sleezy. I suppose it's getting there fast.

 

But the Taiwanese dramas are definitely HEART-centered passion and not just trying to get into a man's pants. haha.

 

I like Michelle -- oh and that short stocky female lead -- I wonder what her new one is....

 

Rainie unfortunately is past her prime now - her jing energy is lower. haha.

 

Still I watched all her dramas like a devoted teenage puppie dog fan.

 

Yeah Amber Kuo

 

http://sugoideas.com/drama-2010/channel-x/

 

This one was kind of hard to get through but still good.

 

Yea I guess that's why the Chinese/Taiwanese girls love talking to me though they tend to avoid most of the other white guys at my school lol. I'm the weird white guy that is doing heart meditations and not trying to get into their pants haha.

 

*haha I watched some of that TV show, its kind of cheesy but like you said "cute" lol

Edited May 18, 2013 by dmattwads

[voidisyinyang]

Yea I guess that's why the Chinese/Taiwanese girls love talking to me though they tend to avoid most of the other white guys at my school lol. I'm the weird white guy that is doing heart meditations and not trying to get into their pants haha.

 

*haha I watched some of that TV show, its kind of cheesy but like you said "cute" lol

 

Yeah I like the females but when the males showed up to start chasing the females - I just feel so sorry for the males I can't watch it. the males are just the "perfect" commodity for the females. haha. It's this whole female fantasy world to have some subservient hunky male that just buys them everything they want and flirts just enough to make it exciting but otherwise is totally bland, etc.

 

I mean I'm all for strong female roles -- and the dramas are definitely all about strong females and making sure the females get what they want. But the overall context is just promoting bourgeois capitalist consumerism and so what the females want just is wrong in the end - just this apocalyptic scenario.

 

The environmental one the last time was cool -- and also in this one Amber Kuo obviously is the rich girl with the bad attitude since money doesn't provide happiness. So then she wants a loving family which is what the poor girl has and so they are perfect combo.

 

That's fine - but then they gotta get their basically sex slave males to serve them. haha.

 

It's called Love Forward - so this one the male says out right - "you're too pretty to go home alone you won't be safe." Then the female goes: "YOu're shameless" and then the other female goes: "O.K. you can take me home" and gives the first female a coy look like - see I can be "forward" and it's fine.

 

So yeah I would say this drama is definitely different in that sense -- it has definitely pushed the sex boundary to be more Westernized.

 

What I liked about the other Taiwanese dramas is the sexual tension was just simmering the whole time - it built up so slowly over weeks and weeks.

 

So it was pretty innocent -- and the other emotions were more dominant -- . http://entertainment.xin.msn.com/en/celebrity/buzz/asia/tony-yang-and-amber-kuo-spotted-vacationing-in-europe

 

Oh I was taking about this new drama that I started watching..... So Amber Kuo actually hooked up with the actor.

 

Congratulations! Poor Rainie Yang has yet to get a real boyfriend from all the male leads she's acted with. haha.

 

Ah so they did a movie also - not just a drama. Wow --

 

 

They become apprentices to Silly Pork, played by veteran actor Chen Po-cheng (陳博正), a kung-fu warrior who used to be a bodyguard for former president Lee Teng-hui (李登輝), and quickly masters the one-finger, martial-arts technique.

It doesn’t take long before David’s estranged daughter Jin (Amber Kuo, 郭采潔) finds out the truth and joins the team. Fighting bad guys at night, the three masked fighters win popularity among locals, and in the process, David is also able to make up for lost time and rebuild the father-daughter relationship with Jin.

 

http://www.taipeitimes.com/News/feat/archives/2013/02/01/2003553925

Edited May 18, 2013 by pythagoreanfulllotus

[Maddie]

I know I've already mentioned this some, but after some more meditation the insight deepens lol. So they way it seems to me from at least a subjective point of view is that Samantha improves my concentration for Vipassana AND creates space for the latent subconscious to arise thus making me aware of what really is in there.

 

Then Vipassana allows me to dissect those elements of the subconscious that arise through observation until this seem to .. um... dissolve? At least that's how it seems.

 

So here is how its gone. The past few days I did a lot of Samantha. Last night I got hit with all sorts of strong desire of mostly the sexual variety. This morning I did a Vipassana session before clinic and the desire dissolved to a large degree. I got back from clinic and did another Vipassana session and at least on a conscious level I can't detect any desire at the moment.

 

Now I'm not naive enough to think I've eliminated all desire lol, but what I am saying is that at this moment I am not consciously aware of any. But never to worry I'm sure some more Samantha will uncover a fresh batch haha.

 

In the midst of this evenings Vipassana session when I was staring desire in the face and it felt intense for a while it suddenly became so crystal clear as to why one would reincarnate if they had not eliminated attachments and cravings. Just that deep strong instinctual urge to have, and experience the sensation of the senses is so powerful the thought of abandoning it would seem like the greatest disaster for the subconscious.

 

I found this little clip from Ajahn Sona interesting in light of this day I've had lol. Plus I think his monastery in BC is sweet :-)

 

Edited May 19, 2013 by dmattwads

[Maddie]

Ok so previously I had mentioned how I did not feel desire in the sexual organ but in my heart. Now I'm at over 50 days of retention and meditation and I seem to be having the opposite end of the equation. I tried to go to bed and I wasn't thinking about sex or anything but my "member" was very sensitive and stood to attention for no apparent reason (i.e. I wasn't thinking about anything sexual).

 

So in the past when I felt the heart desire doing the heart meditation would help. Tonight it did nothing. So instead I did the kidney healing sound and things subsided. I wonder they this reversal of experience now?

[joeblast]

squeaky wheel

 

http://thetaobums.com/topic/13357-banter/page-13#entry352612

[Maddie]

Hey Drew

 

I decided to give something you had mentioned a try to day and so far it seems to have worked well. So what happened is I was hanging out with my roommate today for a while. I feel her starting to suck up my qi and at first I stop it. Then I remembered you saying how you would let a female have your qi and you would draw in her jing through your perineum (if I remember correctly). So I decided to give this method a shot. So I just go ahead and let her draw the qi from me while this is going on I draw in jing from her.

 

Now nothing dramatic happened as in your experiences but I noticed that after a little while that both of us seemed to have this super relaxed look to us lol. I feel a little tired but not nearly to the extent that I did in the past when she would suck up my qi. As she is young and has never had children she had a lot of jing so it was relatively easy to take it in. I didn't feel any sort of what I'd call an orgasmic feeling but I just feel super chill super relaxed, very nice. The only catch seems to be that I feel some of her emotional issues from it, but since I feel so relaxed I don't really care that much haha. Once I get back from clinic in the evening I plan on meditating anyways so I'll just deal with that then.

 

So drawing in her jing made me feel very relaxed and judging from her expression and reading her energy I could tell that she was feeling good as well but I think it got her a little hot and bothered because I first felt her start to think of her bf specifically that she wanted sex from him now that she was turned on, and then a few seconds later she said "I need to go to my bf's" lol with a sense of urgency I rarely hear from her haha. It kind of reminds me of the times you said some guy would suck up your energy and then have to go to the bathroom haha.

Edited May 30, 2013 by dmattwads

[Tibetan_Ice]

Hey Drew

 

I decided to give something you had mentioned a try to day and so far it seems to have worked well. So what happened is I was hanging out with my roommate today for a while. I feel her starting to suck up my qi and at first I stop it. Then I remembered you saying how you would let a female have your qi and you would draw in her jing through your perineum (if I remember correctly). So I decided to give this method a shot. So I just go ahead and let her draw the qi from me while this is going on I draw in jing from her.

 

Now nothing dramatic happened as in your experiences but I noticed that after a little while that both of us seemed to have this super relaxed look to us lol. I feel a little tired but not nearly to the extent that I did in the past when she would suck up my qi. As she is young and has never had children she had a lot of jing so it was relatively easy to take it in. I didn't feel any sort of what I'd call an orgasmic feeling but I just feel super chill super relaxed, very nice. The only catch seems to be that I feel some of her emotional issues from it, but since I feel so relaxed I don't really care that much haha. Once I get back from clinic in the evening I plan on meditating anyways so I'll just deal with that then.

 

So drawing in her jing made me feel very relaxed and judging from her expression and reading her energy I could tell that she was feeling good as well but I think it got her a little hot and bothered because I first felt her start to think of her bf specifically that she wanted sex from him now that she was turned on, and then a few seconds later she said "I need to go to my bf's" lol with a sense of urgency I rarely hear from her haha. It kind of reminds me of the times you said some guy would suck up your energy and then have to go to the bathroom haha.

Hi D

You might want to consider that kundalini is a contact sport. By exchanging energies with your rm, you could cause her kundalini to become active.

You might also want to consider the ethics of syphoning off someone's energies without their consent or knowledge of the consequences..

Welcome to the big league..

 

TI

Edited May 30, 2013 by Tibetan_Ice

[Maddie]

 

Hi D

You might want to consider that kundalini is a contact sport. By exchanging energies with your rm, you could cause her kundalini to become active.

You might also want to consider the ethics of syphoning off someone's energies without their consent or knowledge of the consequences..

Welcome to the big league..

 

TI

I looked at it more as an exchange as she was already beginning to draw off my qi as she tends to, but I had not considered the Kundalini aspect of it . Good point I would not want to trigger this in her, especially as she is mundane and would have no idea what's going on and I'd feel very bad if I drove her looney.

Edited May 30, 2013 by dmattwads

[billb]

Is it really an exchange without 2 consenting adults? Has she actually told you she draws off of your chi or is this your interpretation of things?

[voidisyinyang]

For advanced qi training there can be no sexual thoughts.

 

But in the modern context most people can probably only practice tantra.

 

As our energy builds up then we attract the complementary opposite type of energy - so the higher we go - the lower we attract.

 

This means more serious blockages to be emptied out.

 

I woke myself up from a dream of darkest import and then flexed the PC muscle while having a huge internal orgasm and then I went into full lotus to sublimate it. Then I slept for a bit but then went back into full lotus for part two which is to bring the energy down the front - through mind emptiness.

 

But as Nan and Bodri state - if the mind was already dirtied by the thoughts then you can't really make chi energy from it.

 

So to keep building up chi energy requires a pure environment - otherwise people around us are always sucking off or sapping our energy.

 

I have been told this directly by a qigong master so it's not just my interpretation.

 

As for the psychic mutual climaxes I have had verbal confirmation besides all the body language of orgasms. haha.

 

I stopped "flexing" my pineal gland since it was draining my energy - besides it was just yin chi and made me smell like crap all the time.

 

I still have to be very careful about my diet as Chunyi says for a qigong person food easily "goes to the head."

 

Also I rarely ejaculate since my energy still just gets drained off as chi energy - so I burn off the sex fluids - but then the chi energy still gets suck up - so I am not building up my energy. The more you build up your energy then the more dangerous the training is to lose the alchemical pill through nocturnal emission - and also the more people around you will try to deconvert your chi energy back to the mundane level of their energy.

 

But since I do outside manual labor then my diet is not pure enough.

 

So as the practice advances it really is required to have a special environment to meditate - so that a pure ascetic diet can be maintained and also without being emotionally attacked by mundane people stuck in the sex-fear-anger cycle of life. This is best achieved by being a superhuman warrior to fight off the pervs, etc. haha. That's why qigong training was the focus only after becoming a kungfu master.

 

But yeah this training is not much appreciated now in modern times as people rely on technology for their needs instead of on the timeless training of universal love energy. haha.

[Jetsun]

People here have their own interpretations about energy exchange, but one of the most experienced energy healers I have been studying recently says:

 

"You can't pick up other peoples stuff; the only stuff you can have is your own... as common as these beliefs are, they have no validity whatsoever. Here is an example of the experiences that give rise to these myths: lets say I am doing a healing session with someone who is grieving. If I have a lot of suppressed or unresolved grief within myself, then becoming aware of the receivers grief may trigger and bring to the surface my own. At the end of the session, I may feel sad and think that I have picked up the other persons grief, but this is a misconception; the only grief I have - or can ever experience - is my own"

 

So its worth reconsidering how these other people are taking your energy or bringing you into their level, personally I think it is far more likely they are just triggering your own issues within yourself, they aren't actually doing anything to you at all. As long as you believe it is the other people doing these things to you you will always be blind and unconscious to the real trigger and issue.

[三江源]

I know I get anxiety and fear triggered by some people's energy field.. well.. probaby to an extent by more or less everyone's energy field, depending on where I am at, at any given time.

 

But highly stressed personal energy of others, triggers contraction in me, often.

 

I do know for sure that some qi healers do take into themselves the sick energy of others and have to do a lot of training to remove it. It happens.

 

There must be different ways of healing.

[Branderplank]

Jetsun, I can readily accept your quote. No need for me to add to this discussion. Perception about give and take, cause and effect, self and the other. Balance!

[Maddie]

Is it really an exchange without 2 consenting adults? Has she actually told you she draws off of your chi or is this your interpretation of things?

She does not even realize consciously what she is doing at all, its just sort of instinct for her and a lot of people. Later that day she gave me a classic example of how she does it. So at the time she was draining off m qi I was helping her change her bike tire. It was kind of tricky and at one point we were contemplating taking it to the bike shop down the road, but we eventually got it. After that we went to lunch and as we were talking about the bike tire she was telling me that if we had been unable to get the tired changed that her next tactic would have been to go to the bike shop and play "cute and dumb" in hopes of getting the tired changed for free.

 

I asked her why she would act dumb. She said because if she went in there being smart and serious and saying "I am having a hard time getting this bike tire on" then they would most likely view her neutrally and charge her.

 

Then she said but if I go in there and say in a high voice "oh can you please help me I don't have any idea what I'm doing" and acting like a dumb bimbo that they would want to run to the rescue lol.

 

Now on my end this was VERY enlightening. When she said it the first time I felt nothing in particular. The second time she said it I could actually feel my "male hero empathy" aroused and my qi drained off by her for the few seconds she was talking that way lol.

[Maddie]

People here have their own interpretations about energy exchange, but one of the most experienced energy healers I have been studying recently says:

 

"You can't pick up other peoples stuff; the only stuff you can have is your own... as common as these beliefs are, they have no validity whatsoever. Here is an example of the experiences that give rise to these myths: lets say I am doing a healing session with someone who is grieving. If I have a lot of suppressed or unresolved grief within myself, then becoming aware of the receivers grief may trigger and bring to the surface my own. At the end of the session, I may feel sad and think that I have picked up the other persons grief, but this is a misconception; the only grief I have - or can ever experience - is my own"

 

So its worth reconsidering how these other people are taking your energy or bringing you into their level, personally I think it is far more likely they are just triggering your own issues within yourself, they aren't actually doing anything to you at all. As long as you believe it is the other people doing these things to you you will always be blind and unconscious to the real trigger and issue.

I'll agree with you to a point. Granted things that someone else has that are similar to your own issues will allow that person to trigger your stuff much more easily.

 

On the other hand my professor at said that the problem of picking up your patients sick qi can be a real danger and was showing us ways to avoid it. His family has a TCM lineage that goes back generations and his highly respected in Taiwan.

 

It's very common for me to hear students complaining of feeling what their patient feels after needling them. I even had on student ask me to help her needle a patient once. I had no idea what this patient was there for, I was just helping the other student. After we finished I felt lower abdominal pain in a way I had never felt before. I asked the student what her patient was there for and she said "menstrual cramps" lol, and I can assure you that's not something I've had haha.

 

When I first started internship I always had to go take a nap after clinic cause I was so tired, and many other new interns have this same experience. When your new and don't know yet how to stop getting your qi drained off it makes you so tired.