Kids - young tao naturalists

[tumoessence]

For all parents to be

 

When my son was two or so we were outside and it was getting dark and he asked me to keep the sun from going down so that we could play longer. My heart seemed to stop and I realized how kids initially regard us, and the responsibiliy I have in the the behavior and environment I create through my behavior and actions primarily. I am his teacher whether I like it or not. He is going to value at least in the early ages, what I value. TV is definitely out.

Trunk you're right on.

[VCraigP]

Hey, do you know where we are now? " The daughter replied "No daddy". He continued, "Now we are out in Nature". The daughter shook her little head and said "No daddy! We are not in Nature, We are here! "

 

I love it. Child Zen.

 

I am inspired by the "no TV" comment as well.

 

Despite my various ideals I am afraid there is far too much TV in my household.

We are weaning ourselves of it, but would have been far better off to have come from a starting point with the kids of NO TV.

We've been fairly successfull with limiting junk food to almost never including no sodapop and very infrequent candies.

 

As my wife likes to say, "if we weren't together you would be off in a cave somewhere."

It is much easier to make a Monk's choices when you are single. Dietary choices, entertainment choices.

 

But if you turn the TV off you will find that all that the children really want is to be with you and do...whatever, anything. Cherish that. One thing I hope never happens is that they grow up to not want anything to do with Mom and Dad. Right now with kids at 4 and 6 1/2 it seems impossible. But everyone says they will grow up to be surely, ungrateful teenagers. Like a lot of Cliche's in society about what to expect I hope to have a different path with my children.

 

Oh, one interesting piece of advice Hagar. When my wife was pregnant with our son I read the ENTIRE Lord of the Rings Trilogy out loud to her, and to my son in Utero.

It is said that they can hear you in the womb to some extent. Of course they hear their mother's voice, but I think this practice lead to him becoming familiar with my voice before being born as well. Did the same thing with my daughter (different literature). It was a nice thing to do, and my wife enjoyed it as well. And definitely better than watching TV.

 

Good luck to you on this incredible journey you are embarking upon.

 

Oh, another piece.

ONe realization which becoming a father brought to me was an entirely different level of emotional life. I thought I had made some progress in opening my heart. I feel now as a father as if my life before fatherhood was led by an entirely different me who just didn't quite "get it" emotionally. It was an awakening on the emotional level which is very deep, and mostly unexpected.

 

Good Chi

 

Craig

[thelerner]

I was looking for a cheap Carribean vacation when I stumbled onto Ashrams. On paradise Island there was a Sivananda Yoga Ashram where $35 bucks a day bought food, shelter and well yoga lessons. I'd never done yoga, but a $35 a day all inclusive sounded great.

 

It was so great I stayed an extra week. One part of the yoga was called Karma Yoga. It was simply doing work, most often hard around the Ashram. It was maybe the most valuable part of the trip. Working hours, 3 or 4 each day, no reward, didn't have to. Very valuable training.

 

Having a kid is the most wonderful opportunity for Karma Yoga. Others might feed ghosts, but we have hungry living souls wanting 20 hours a day. The opportunity for selflessness service is there always. There's something good about that.

 

It gets us out of Me and Mine, and into service. Helping others w/ often little thanks. Less me and the IMPORTANT THING I'M DOING NOW and more tie the shoe, wait 5 more minutes, more water, less oatmeal. Its good non ego training.

 

Michael

[Yoda]

an entirely different me who just didn't quite "get it" emotionally.

 

 

That's a whole can of worms. Having kids changes you, but it's hard to say which is better. Positive aspects in both camps, and I'm sure it depends on the individual.

 

A study was done of female cats before, during, and after motherhood. Before motherhood it took an average of 7 hunting attempts to succeed. During (and after) motherhood it took 3 attempts per success.

 

Like with everything else in life, if you really enjoy your kids, it'll heal and transform you. If you don't enjoy your kids, it'll wear you down.

 

-Yoda

[Yoda]

Michael-- did you just come back from the ashram??? Learn any cool chi tricks, stretches, etc?

[thelerner]

It was great, except I had to cut my tongue off. Kidding kidding

 

 

That was way back in 90, when I quit my job, started in the Carribean Ashram for 2 weeks, then back packed and bummed through Israel and Europe for about 4 months. Some of the best times of my life.

 

The Sivananda Ashram on Paradise Island (by Nassau) is still there I think. Great teachers, 2 yoga classes a day 2 meditation classes, all mandatory to keep out dead beats who wanted to use them for a cheap vacation.

 

I became a secret guide to the Bob Stark Casino hotel. Sneaking people out at 11:00, gambling and seeing risque shows, sleeping during the 6:00 morning meditation. Living clean and vegetarian during the day, then debauchery at nite. When I wanted to stop people kept dragging me back as 'the guide'.

 

Girls who were about to go to the Arctic as nurses wanted to be taken to the casino. A guy about to make vows at the Kripalu yoga center wanted a last wild fling. By the end I just wanted to get into the yoga, but I was living a wildy dualistic life. My posse would tresspass at Club Med, chase people out of hot tubs by folding there legs behind there heads and floating like dumplings in boiling water.

 

The yoga was good, the food was very good, they served 2 large meals a day. Best were the vendors on the beach. They'd crack open a coconut, pour in pineapple rum and some ice. Such forbidden treats were delicious, and you could get 2 for $5.

 

Most days yoga was done on a platform right on the beach taught by orange clad Swamis. Kids were allowed, some yoga babies were roaming free. There was an entire high school yoga club there at one point.

 

Michael