hammer Posted August 8, 2009 I've been thinking lately about what it means to be a "real man" as opposed to a boy who has gained age but not maturity. I think that in this day and age the idea of manliness comes with too many negative connotations and few if any positive ones. Way back in the days before the industrial revolution every culture had specific rites that a boy had to go through in order to join the ranks of the men. Manhood was something to be revered. In our modern times we have none of this and I think it is the majority of the reason that men don't feel like men anymore. Â I am 33 years old and though I am happier and better adjusted than I was as a screwed up little kid I still do not know entirely what it means to be a man. Â I was wondering if anyone here has any thoughts on what traits separate boyhood from manhood. What needs to be added to the boy, what needs to be eliminated from him? Have any of you read any good books on these ideas? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aetherous Posted August 8, 2009 To have the power to choose your life makes you a man, regardless of age. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sloppy Zhang Posted August 8, 2009 Don't take this the wrong way.....  But not caring what anyone thinks of you Who cares if they think you are being a man? Who cares if they think you aren't?  Act with conviction, do what you feel to be right, and have no regrets.  And if anyone cares.... you're not the one losing sleep over it  Just walk away into the sunset....... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky7Strikes Posted August 8, 2009 Don't take this the wrong way.....  But not caring what anyone thinks of you Who cares if they think you are being a man? Who cares if they think you aren't?  Act with conviction, do what you feel to be right, and have no regrets.  And if anyone cares.... you're not the one losing sleep over it  Just walk away into the sunset.......  Sloppy Zhang is a real man. . Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nodoubt Posted August 8, 2009 I've been thinking lately about what it means to be a "real man" Â Hello Hammer. Â As opposed to being a fake man I don't know. Â We are fields of awareness with specific genitalia attached. Â The concept of a real man is form and identifying with form will lead to suffering. Â I find it interesting that the term real man is used more often than,what it's like to be a real woman. Â This term real man sounds like a wedge,an issue of separation-unnecessary baggage. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aetherous Posted August 8, 2009 Act with conviction, do what you feel to be right, and have no regrets. Â I agree with this! Â It's all about being "self actualized". Â This term real man sounds like a wedge,an issue of separation-unnecessary baggage. Â That's exactly it. A real man has little unnecessary baggage. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
de_paradise Posted August 8, 2009 We are too complex an animal to be summarized by a few pithy sentences. Besides that, the traits good for attaining spiritual ascension, such as compassion, generosity, love, world-as-self outlook, childlike curiosity..etc, these are whats really important. Muchthat other stuff about being men or MEN is the outlook of playground and society we live in, not big R reality. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted August 8, 2009 I think that the key to adulthood (both men and women) is in taking full responsibility for all your own actions. Â Be well! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
October Gray Posted August 8, 2009 Whereas I agree with Marblehead on this one, I don't usually concentrate on such things. I'd rather concnetrate on how to become a better person than how to become a better adult. Â Something that has quite frankly always pissed me off is when an adult thinks they are any more important than a child. The way I see it, everyone is just as important as the next. I hate when someone thinks they are better for any reason. Â Now, dicipline and teachings of respect and such things are of course nothing I object to... But in my personal experience, the way we live today in America, everyone's itching to prove they are much better than the next person, even people you would think are decent, living a well life. Â And, in a way, dealing with the kind of adults I have to deal with... I almost have to wonder if we never can truely call ourselves adults anymore. Often times I see these people around me and think that they are children, only with more responsibilites on their shoulders because of their age. Â Ultimately, my advice to you is simply to not get caught up in silly things like this as I have. Â As long as you are satisfied with who you are, no such thing should be able to bring you down. Or so is my belief. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Uncle Fester Posted August 8, 2009 (edited) . Edited September 19, 2021 by darebak Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Kabalabhati Posted August 8, 2009 I would shorten the question: "What is real?" Â Starting a building project and finally finishing it gave me that good ol yang feeling. It helps if you have a woman to admire the solid construction once it's done. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky7Strikes Posted August 8, 2009 (edited) Edited August 8, 2009 by Lucky7Strikes Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
phore Posted August 8, 2009 "A true warrior has the spirit of a great woman, speaks only from the heart, and breaths through his feet."  -Ethiopian wisdom    A true warrior has the heart of a woman, takes himself lightly, and his compassion encompasses all like a great ocean. (Some wise sayings that goes around martial arts circles ) "You" should study on this. ha weposted the same thing Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky7Strikes Posted August 8, 2009 "A true warrior has the spirit of a great woman, speaks only from the heart, and breaths through his feet."  -Ethiopian wisdom ha weposted the same thing  HAHAHA  You must've read Glenn Morris. That's where I got that one. . Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
phore Posted August 8, 2009 HAHAHA  You must've read Glenn Morris. That's where I got that one. . yes, quoted it directly from his book  im currently practicing his system http://www.kundaliniawakeningprocess.com/k...xplanation.html Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hammer Posted August 9, 2009 This was obviously the wrong place to pose this question. It seems that most of you are answering a much deeper question than I am asking. I'm just looking for a way to feel more masculine energy in my life. I'm not looking for anybody's assessment of how mature or immature I am, and frankly I don't think that anybody here knows enough about me to make those assumptions.  The second thing I want to address is the mistaken idea that some of you have about me being completely self serving.  The only person that I am specifically trying to please with my life is myself.  Really you think that the maximum you can strive for as a human being is to please yourself? This I find is very limiting. Is this really all you aspire for?  Sir, I believe you're approaching this the wrong way.  The fact that you're only trying to please yourself in life suggests...   What I meant by writing this quote is that I think it is foolish to go about your life trying to please everybody but yourself. In my opinion it is important to take care of yourself first so that you CAN take better care of others. The more I do to improve my life, the better I am able to help people who are in situations that I have been in. In fact, I feel that helping people improve their lives is the primary reason that I am here to begin with. The selfishness and immaturity comes when someone either does not see, or loses sight of the part where they're supposed to extend that help to other people. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Kabalabhati Posted August 9, 2009 (edited) If more masculine energy is needed, then it could be a good start to do more harder, heating physical exercise. Even simply doing the Breath of Fire exercise is more yang energy I've understood. Edited August 9, 2009 by King Kabalabhati Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pietro Posted August 9, 2009 What I meant by writing this quote is that I think it is foolish to go about your life trying to please everybody but yourself. I agree. But in a general way the point is not about pleasing. Not about pleasing yourself, not about pleasing others. Simply it's not about pleasing. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky7Strikes Posted August 9, 2009 (edited) This was obviously the wrong place to pose this question. It seems that most of you are answering a much deeper question than I am asking. I'm just looking for a way to feel more masculine energy in my life. I'm not looking for anybody's assessment of how mature or immature I am, and frankly I don't think that anybody here knows enough about me to make those assumptions. Â Selfishness and selflessness can be equated I guess. Â I didn't know you wanted a more technical answer. Sorry for the quick judgments. Â But coincidentally, there was a post on how reversing the wheel backwards can give you more Yang energy. Check out the last few posts on The Secret of Golden Flower. Taking Ginseng also helps. Â Make sure you ground when you do it. Too much Yang can repel. . Edited August 9, 2009 by Lucky7Strikes Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
