Okay, I have a little dilemma. I would love some help.

[DalTheJigsaw123]

[Apech]

Hi Leon,

 

Just some thoughts. Beware the 'out of the frying pan and into the fire effect'. Look at why retail/customer service rips your soul to shreds - what are the factors and what are the effects - try to see how and why this is happening - because otherwise you might carry these effects with you to any new situation. Very often the way out is the way through - meaning focus into the present 100% and doors will open. Think transferable skills that you can use to move things forward. Define your ideal job - perhaps by reversing every negative thing about the existing one. Also if you can't see a way to your perfect job immediately look for an intermediate step.

 

A.

[goldisheavy]

You seem like a sane person, and your desires appear reasonable and achievable. Therefore you should have no problem reaching your goal. The real problem I guess is that you don't know what you want to do as a profession.

 

Profession is about exchanging value. If you do something of value for others, you get some value back from society/others. That's all it is.

 

We tend to be good at things we enjoy doing. And if you enjoy doing something that you're not currently good at, you almost always become good at it sooner rather than later.

 

Therefore, the most valuable thing you can do for others is also, very likely, the thing you enjoy doing. This makes it sound like there is one thing, but that's not true. You most likely enjoy many activities. Ultimately being good at something is what matters to others when they want to get value from you, but if you are good at something that you do not enjoy, this puts a constant strain on your life -- this is like going against the grain. It's doable, but most people prefer better options (like being good at something you also enjoy doing).

 

Another reason people will trade is to avoid a boring activity. It is especially fortuitous if what's boring to one is exciting to another. However if some activity is boring to everyone, even though there is value in doing it for others, it is always going to be hard.

 

So you said you like writing. Maybe you should seek employment in that area? Try writing a blog, or a newsletter? Become an English tutor? Cooperate with a budding game designer to write some role playing game copy? Write custom copy for cards (a lot of Hallmark cards are boring... can you do better? Someone might want to pay you for it)? Dream a bit. What other skillful activities do you enjoy doing? Here I was just chasing the writing aspect a bit, but I am sure you have other potentials too. You can chase those to get a lot more variety. Like I said, dream a bit.

 

It seems like your question has 90% of the answer already in it. Why don't you reread your question and see if your answer is not already in it.

[Owledge]

@goldisheavy

Of course I can't speak for Leon, but I think you answer is great in many ways. Just wanted to mention that.

I hope that compliment won't feed your ego, but I guess you can handle it.

[doc benway]

Good responses so far -

Similar to the points made by apepch7, I think it's very instructive when you are unhappy in a situation to also look at what it is in or about yourself that may be making you feel unhappy. Recognize that it is not the external world that makes us feel good or bad - it is our own expectations, desires, disappointments, and so forth. We tend to change the situation in hopes of improving things but often end up bringing our same baggage to the new situation.

 

I'm not Buddhist but I see great value in the concept of "right occupation". If possible, try to work in a role and environment where you feel like you are making positive contributions to others, yourself, your community, and so on. All jobs tend to become wearisome eventually. Sometimes it is simply knowing that you are doing good in some way that makes it more palatable in the long run. This aspect of my occupation didn't mean much to me at one point in my life but does now.

 

Good luck!

[TheSongsofDistantEarth]

Here's a few tips, Leon.

 

Almost anything can be soul killing or soul grinding. Even, or especially taking care of people in the healthcare system. One possible way that may not yet be tainted is to become an acupuncturist, oriental medicine doctor or naturopath. Even so, one needs business skills to flourish, so your studies will help there, maybe look at whatever you're doing now as training for excellence in another field. Excel in the retail world, conquer it, and you'll have skills and experience to propel you to your next adventure.

 

As for writing...I once had a wonderful teacher of rhetoric who had us doing a valuable exercise all semester long: find writers you admire, and copy their best works. Literally copy: keep a notebook and write out in longhand each chapter or essay you admire. It's best to focus on one writer at a time. By using this tedious process, you begin to internalize another's style. It goes into your brain cells and sets patterns that you then begin to weave into your own style. Find some really good writers start with, like Joan Didion or Truman Capote, and begin copying their stuff out as your exercise. Try it, it will really influence your writing for the better--not just style, but ideas and thought processes as well, if you do it enough!

 

Also, I recommend a book buy a very successful author, Stephen Pressfield, called The War of Art: Winning the Inner Creative Battle. It will inspire you mightily and give you an idea of the kind of effort and determination you will require to become a successful writer or a successful anything, for that matter.

 

Good Luck. And whatever it is that you settle on to do, make sure you love it. It will make all the difference in the world to your success!

 

Your Pal,

 

Mr Songs

Edited November 24, 2009 by TheSongsofDistantEarth

[DalTheJigsaw123]

Hi Leon,

 

Just some thoughts. Beware the 'out of the frying pan and into the fire effect'. Look at why retail/customer service rips your soul to shreds - what are the factors and what are the effects - try to see how and why this is happening - because otherwise you might carry these effects with you to any new situation. Very often the way out is the way through - meaning focus into the present 100% and doors will open. Think transferable skills that you can use to move things forward. Define your ideal job - perhaps by reversing every negative thing about the existing one. Also if you can't see a way to your perfect job immediately look for an intermediate step.

 

A.

 

Thank you Apepch7! I believe the reason I feel that it is "eating my soul," is because of what the services is. "SELLING CLOTHING," that doesn't seem to be a good thing in this part of the world. As that feeds ego and creates material minds? I do not want to help people with feeding their egos.... Thank you!

 

 

You seem like a sane person, and your desires appear reasonable and achievable. Therefore you should have no problem reaching your goal. The real problem I guess is that you don't know what you want to do as a profession.

 

Profession is about exchanging value. If you do something of value for others, you get some value back from society/others. That's all it is.

 

We tend to be good at things we enjoy doing. And if you enjoy doing something that you're not currently good at, you almost always become good at it sooner rather than later.

 

Therefore, the most valuable thing you can do for others is also, very likely, the thing you enjoy doing. This makes it sound like there is one thing, but that's not true. You most likely enjoy many activities. Ultimately being good at something is what matters to others when they want to get value from you, but if you are good at something that you do not enjoy, this puts a constant strain on your life -- this is like going against the grain. It's doable, but most people prefer better options (like being good at something you also enjoy doing).

 

Another reason people will trade is to avoid a boring activity. It is especially fortuitous if what's boring to one is exciting to another. However if some activity is boring to everyone, even though there is value in doing it for others, it is always going to be hard.

 

So you said you like writing. Maybe you should seek employment in that area? Try writing a blog, or a newsletter? Become an English tutor? Cooperate with a budding game designer to write some role playing game copy? Write custom copy for cards (a lot of Hallmark cards are boring... can you do better? Someone might want to pay you for it)? Dream a bit. What other skillful activities do you enjoy doing? Here I was just chasing the writing aspect a bit, but I am sure you have other potentials too. You can chase those to get a lot more variety. Like I said, dream a bit.

 

 

It seems like your question has 90% of the answer already in it. Why don't you reread your question and see if your answer is not already in it.

 

Thank you! Good point! I will do that. Great advice!

 

 

@goldisheavy

Of course I can't speak for Leon, but I think you answer is great in many ways. Just wanted to mention that.

I hope that compliment won't feed your ego, but I guess you can handle it.

 

It was! Thank you so much.

 

Good responses so far -

Similar to the points made by apepch7, I think it's very instructive when you are unhappy in a situation to also look at what it is in or about yourself that may be making you feel unhappy. Recognize that it is not the external world that makes us feel good or bad - it is our own expectations, desires, disappointments, and so forth. We tend to change the situation in hopes of improving things but often end up bringing our same baggage to the new situation.

 

I'm not Buddhist but I see great value in the concept of "right occupation". If possible, try to work in a role and environment where you feel like you are making positive contributions to others, yourself, your community, and so on. All jobs tend to become wearisome eventually. Sometimes it is simply knowing that you are doing good in some way that makes it more palatable in the long run. This aspect of my occupation didn't mean much to me at one point in my life but does now.

 

Good luck!

 

Yea, maybe there simply isn't a right occupation? It's the thought of it? Maybe writing is for me, but not to the extent I want it to be?

 

Here's a few tips, Leon.

 

Almost anything can be soul killing or soul grinding. Even, or especially taking care of people in the healthcare system. One possible way that may not yet be tainted is to become an acupuncturist, oriental medicine doctor or naturopath. Even so, one needs business skills to flourish, so your studies will help there, maybe look at whatever you're doing now as training for excellence in another field. Excel in the retail world, conquer it, and you'll have skills and experience to propel you to your next adventure.

 

As for writing...I once had a wonderful teacher of rhetoric who had us doing a valuable exercise all semester long: find writers you admire, and copy their best works. Literally copy: keep a notebook and write out in longhand each chapter or essay you admire. It's best to focus on one writer at a time. By using this tedious process, you begin to internalize another's style. It goes into your brain cells and sets patterns that you then begin to weave into your own style. Find some really good writers start with, like Joan Didion or Truman Capote, and begin copying their stuff out as your exercise. Try it, it will really influence your writing for the better--not just style, but ideas and thought processes as well, if you do it enough!

 

Also, I recommend a book buy a very successful author, Stephen Pressfield, called The War of Art: Winning the Inner Creative Battle. It will inspire you mightily and give you an idea of the kind of effort and determination you will require to become a successful writer or a successful anything, for that matter.

 

Good Luck. And whatever it is that you settle on to do, make sure you love it. It will make all the difference in the world to your success!

 

Your Pal,

 

Mr Songs

 

Beautiful advice! Thank you:) I will check out the books you recommend and taking your advice to heart.

 

Thank you all for such wonderful advice!

[33865_1494798762]

Leon -

How do you listen to others? The same way you listen to your self?

[DalTheJigsaw123]

[Encephalon]

Try to maximize what you already know. If I had to do it all over again, starting with the skills you now possess, I would get certified to teach English overseas, (most likely in an Asian country, possibly China), where I could study another culture and perhaps make contact with some highly skilled martial arts and meditation teachers. There's always the Peace Corps too (check out Jack Kornfield's young adult years in Thailand).

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Kornfield

 

You've got everything going for you, since many countries practice age discrimination when hiring English teachers, and if you're not in debt, then there's really nothing holding you back save your own inertia, psychic or otherwise.

[DalTheJigsaw123]

Try to maximize what you already know. If I had to do it all over again, starting with the skills you now possess, I would get certified to teach English overseas, (most likely in an Asian country, possibly China), where I could study another culture and perhaps make contact with some highly skilled martial arts and meditation teachers. There's always the Peace Corps too (check out Jack Kornfield's young adult years in Thailand).

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Kornfield

 

You've got everything going for you, since many countries practice age discrimination when hiring English teachers, and if you're not in debt, then there's really nothing holding you back save your own inertia, psychic or otherwise.

 

I'm thinking of going to China/India. Will see where my journey leads me... I will keep you all posted! Thank you so much everyone.