Am I haveing a spiritual crisis aka kundalini syndrome or dark night of the sould or something similiar?

[mewtwo]

So Basicaly for some time now it has been going on and off me feeling depression and anxiety and such as you guys might know. I would say it started at age 17 I am now 20. I just got out of the hospital on friday because of the way i was feeling. So basicaly the way i was feeling was some bouts of depression and anxiety and thoughts of not knowing where to go with my life. I also had some thought/actions of self harming myself. these were intersperced with regular feelings of happiness. I do not know weather i am going through someting spiritual or not does anyone know if it is something spiritual or not? I am going to see my counseler later this week. Basicaly I am wondering if it is something spiritual or not.

 

 

Thanks

Edited December 8, 2009 by mewtwo

[fiveelementtao]

Ask your counselor first... Nobody on this forum is going to have any real idea what you're problem is. If you are concerned that it is spiritual, then find a spiritual teacher you can see in person and go to counseling Maybe see a psychiatrist. If you are having real medical, psychological or spiritual problems, do not follow any advice from an internet forum....

[mewtwo]

I know that I am just wondering if what i am going throught is spiritual and i will also be seeing my spiritual teacher of wednesday.

[Creation]

Hmmm... in a sense everything is spiritual and in another sense nothing is spiritual. I'm not sure what you are asking.

 

But my heart is with you. I too struggle with depression and anxiety, and used to desire to harm myself, and was once hospitalized for it.

 

May the light of the Infinite One shine upon you.

[fiveelementtao]

I know that I am just wondering if what i am going throught is spiritual and i will also be seeing my spiritual teacher of wednesday.

That seems like a great idea. I suspect that it will probably take a long time to find out to what degree the problem is spiritual. I would suggest that you resist the temptation to "spiritualize" the problem. That, to me, sounds like a recipe to distance yourself from the problem.

bottom line is that your situation sounds pretty serious. As was already said, everything is already spiritual.

[Zhuo Ming-Dao]

If you have any interest in a Buddhist look at the Dark Night of the Soul phenomena, take a look at Daniel Ingram's free book, Mastering the Core Teachings of the Buddha. It may or may not be what you are facing right now, but it is an interesting read on the topic.

 

And his approach is to approach the problem directly through intense insight meditation rather than any form of rationalization, visualization, or otherwise. You observe every moment, sensation and fluctuation of your current state in the moment without any mental interpretation, explanation, or excuse.

 

http://www.interactivebuddha.com/Mastering...e%20Version.pdf

 

Hope this is helpful in your continued explorations.

Edited December 8, 2009 by Zhuo Ming-Dao

[That Guy]

Well I think you're just lost and in a sense alone. I don't know if someone has set the path you're on directly, or if you're just following your current path because it was what is expected of you by your environment. Ask yourself why you are where you are and why you're not satisfied.

 

I would suggest if you don't know where to go with your life you set a goal, even if you don't end up at your goal the journey could lead you to finding out where you wanna go.

 

I have had a friend (and still have), who was in a very similar situation. I can tell you the whole story to this date on a pm if you want, I don't think I should post other peoples stories in the open like this.

[zazaza]

Many people claim that a depression has to do with a chemical imbalance,

but as far as i know it's impossible to prove such thing because when taking

a brainscan of someone you just dont know whether the amount of chemicals

you see on that brainscan,

 

are more or less than what a normal amount for that particular person should be.

i'm not even sure if it's possible to see the chemicals in a brainscan,

but i've read that many psychiatrists hate the myth of chemical imbalance.

 

maybe a negative way of being causes a chemical imbalance, so it would be

better to correct the cause rather than the symptoms?

 

--------------------------------------------

 

mewtwo i'm not sure whether your problem is a physical one (a true chemical imbalance,

something which i believe is rather rare but i guess is possible)

 

or whether your problem is something mental/spiritual.

even if your problem was mental/spiritual then it might be a bit risky

to go off your meds (which i suspect your on)

 

on the other hand, i would totally recommend to taper of your meds under medical

supervision as soon as you've gained a little bit of stability. (which could actually be in

just one month or so.) i recommend this because:

a) sometimes these meds have unpleasant side-effects (even after discontinuation)

if you stay on them, you don't really learn how to handle your feelings.

you might logically think some things through, but when you go off the meds

then you're back in your sober state and chance is that you haven't gotten

any more selfcontrol then before you went on them.

 

but again, be careful about going off the meds too quick.

maybe they're the best thing for you right now. maybe.

once you're off them, don't kill yourself because you know

that in last case scenario, you can go back on your meds

 

 

 

the book that got recommended here on buddhism looks worth reading.

i suggest you read it, or you could read mindfullness in plain english

 

in my opinion,

mastering the mind in the buddhist/taoist way,

is a bit like having faith in god.

 

if you have faith in taking and keeping control of the mind, then u will succeed.

if you don't believe in it, you will fail.

 

it is the task of the demons to tempt you into desire and fear every moment of your life.

if you lose faith in being in control, the demons gain control.

 

the second you renew your belief in self-control, you regain control.

to take back control is to let go of your fears and desires

and to have faith in doing so.

 

--------------------------------------------

 

i'm not sure whether your problem is kundalini related.

maybe i'm wrong but i think everyone has kundalini active inside them to a certain degree.

even people who don't experience the typical sensations in the back might experience powerful emotions

being pushed to the surface by the kundalini force.

 

kundalini or no kundalini, i think it's good for people's energy flow to sit with a straight back

and to not cross your legs. keep your feet beside eachother on the ground,

and most importantly: try to let go of fear of pain/loss and desire for pleasure. i believe that these are the cause of unhappiness. (except in the very rare person with a true chemical imbalance)

 

when you desire pleasure, and you fear pain or loss...

then you are obstructing the natural awakening of inner energies and inner bliss.

i wouldn't bother about wanting specific things such as girlfriends, psychic powers, pleasures, kundalini awakening,

and all these things.

 

the divineenergy is already present within all of us and in fact, we are the divine energy.

instead of wanting something which we think we don't have

we should focus our mind on what is... and then we would see what really is.

 

The tao te ching says

Freed from desire, you can see the hidden mystery.

By having desire, you can only see what is visibly real.

 

 

but i believe nisargadatta describes things more accurately when he says

Increase and widen your desires till nothing but reality can fulfil them. It is not desire that is wrong, but its narrowness and smallness. Desire is devotion. By all means be devoted to the real , the infinite, the eternal heart of being. Your longing to be happy is there. Why? Because you love yourself. By all means, love yourself -wisely. What is wrong is to love yourself stupidly, so as to make yourself suffer. Love yourself wisely. Both indulgence and austerity have the same purpose in view - to make you happy. Indulgence is the stupid way, austerity is the wise way. Once you have gone through an experience, not to go through it again is austerity. To eschew the unnecessary is austerity. Not to anticipate pleasure or pain is austerity. Having things under control at all times is austerity. Desire by itself is not wrong. It is the choices that you make that are wrong. To imagine that some little thing - food, sex, power, fame - will make you happy is to deceive yourself. Only something as vast and deep as your real self can make you truly and lastingly happy. (211-2)

 

...thoughts of not knowing where to go with my life.

may i suggest you just try to help yourself and other living beings?

try to the best of your ability to help in a wise way.

i guess, that is enough.

 

i don't know where exactly to go with my life either.

i just look at the possibilities i have at each moment, and try to make the best of it.

 

some people say that the best way to help others is to help yourself,

once you have self-realized people will find help just by being around you.

 

although i GUESS that doing little bits of charity work on the side don't hurt.

i could be wrong though.

 

 

_/\_

Edited December 8, 2009 by zazaza

[Art]

mewtwo,

 

I can relate to your situation. Things will get better. One could relate it to the "ebb and flow" of life. We become stronger and wiser when we confront life's little challenges.

 

With that said, all of the previous responses have covered things very well. If I may, the last thing I would add is:

 

Only you can bring yourself out of "dark" times, because you are the one who keeps yourself there. This is not to say you are alone. Far from the truth. Seeking help is a good thing. However, in my experiences, no one can give you the answer, the can only give you advice. The answers lie within. Others provide guidance and strength which will help you to break free.

 

...thoughts of not knowing where to go with my life.

 

You have a lifetime to "figure things out", try not to pressure yourself into choosing the path, because you will be missing out on many possibilities....

 

I'll close by wishing you the best of luck and sending you strength to get through this rough time.

 

Sent with positive intentions,

 

Art

[Vajrasattva]

So Basicaly for some time now it has been going on and off me feeling depression and anxiety and such as you guys might know. I would say it started at age 17 I am now 20. I just got out of the hospital on friday because of the way i was feeling. So basicaly the way i was feeling was some bouts of depression and anxiety and thoughts of not knowing where to go with my life. I also had some thought/actions of self harming myself. these were intersperced with regular feelings of happiness. I do not know weather i am going through someting spiritual or not does anyone know if it is something spiritual or not? I am going to see my counseler later this week. Basicaly I am wondering if it is something spiritual or not.

Thanks

 

 

ok a couple questions

 

1) what is your diet like

 

2) what practices have you been doing

 

3) What is your sleep like?

 

4) How much exercise do you get?

[markern]

http://www.amazon.com/Mindfulness-Acceptan...pd_bxgy_b_img_c

 

This is a very good book about a line of therapy that usess mindfulness as a basis. It has consistently gotten much better results then therapies like congitive therapy which is also very good and might for some people still be better as I think midnfulness is not always the best aporach at all times for everyone. THere is a version of this book that also looks specificly at depression.

 

Regardless of wether your problem is spiritual or not this might be a good type of therapy or self help for you. I would advice you ta see a counsler of some sort regularily though.

 

THere are some herbs that are good in cases of anxiety and depression and acupuncture can also do some good to balance you out. See a TCM doctor if you can.

 

Regardless of the cause some sort of physical exercise should be very good for you. As long as you keep it basic and grounded some sort of yoga or qigong or IMA should also be able to do a lot of good. There are also exercise programs like combat conditioning and intu-flow that are more conventional to some extent but still rely more on principles realted to cultivation arts or are at least also give somewhat more of the effects sought through such arts. If you want more conventional exercise with a bit more mental benefit such programs might be something to look into.

 

The yoga routine the five tibetans is very simple and has a profoundly balancing and energising effect on many there are also numerous qigong sequences such as the five animals or exercises?meditations like the six healing sounds that can help a lot. Simple work on belly breathing or meditation can also be good. You could search for the secret smile on this forum. It is a very powerfull and simple meditation for getting you into a great emotional state.

 

 

You could also consider some sort of body therapy. There are many good ones. Perosnlly I have a lot of faith in cranio sacral therapy.

[SeriesOfTubes]

Is it bipolar (I or II) or unipolar (unipolar as in major depressive disorder, single or recurrent episode) or other? If bipolar you definitely should stay on meds first and foremost, especially if you have suicidal ideation. have 3 people ready you can call to talk to if you're feeling like harming yourself. And maybe sign a contract with the bums to remove any weapons from the house (give em to a friend for now). With unipolar depression its a bit safer to try different therapies including alternative that are less invasive than drugs and figure out what works for you. Things like CBT and mindfulness have much greater success rate with unipolar depression and CBT research for bipolar is not nearly as extensive as pharma for bipolar.

 

as has been suggestested, anything health related can certaintly be viewed from a mind/body/spirit perspective. some people who are bipolar can be like direct lines to god or hyper-creative when they are manic (think people like kurt kobain) but still may end up killing themselves. so staying on meds is very very important for bipolar.

[markern]

Is it bipolar (I or II) or unipolar (unipolar as in major depressive disorder, single or recurrent episode) or other? If bipolar you definitely should stay on meds first and foremost, especially if you have suicidal ideation. have 3 people ready you can call to talk to if you're feeling like harming yourself. And maybe sign a contract with the bums to remove any weapons from the house (give em to a friend for now). With unipolar depression its a bit safer to try different therapies including alternative that are less invasive than drugs and figure out what works for you. Things like CBT and mindfulness have much greater success rate with unipolar depression and CBT research for bipolar is not nearly as extensive as pharma for bipolar.

 

as has been suggestested, anything health related can certaintly be viewed from a mind/body/spirit perspective. some people who are bipolar can be like direct lines to god or hyper-creative when they are manic (think people like kurt kobain) but still may end up killing themselves. so staying on meds is very very important for bipolar.

 

 

Very sound advice IMO

[mewtwo]

Thanks everyone

[bobby]

we live in a very toxic world.....

 

mentally and physically....

 

both need to be detoxed...

 

to detox physically we need a high fiber diet and plenty of citrus juices....

 

to detox mentally we need to focus on the present....

 

and regulate the things we feed our minds.....

 

in gnosticism it is recommended to stay way from negative impressions since they pollute the mind....

 

i.e. violence in films and t.v., things that exicte the senses, etc.

 

eventually when a person begins to regulate their mental and physical food....

 

a slow change comes about....calm abiding begins to settle into the person...

 

drugs will only put you into a stupor....and damage your health in the long run....

 

daily meditation practice is very good also.....it helps establish patterns of peace and tranquility.....

 

anxiety is conquered by living in the moment.....whenever a negative thought emerges...let it pass....

 

do not cling to it.....

 

it takes practice...just like playing a piano....

 

but with practice results come....sooner or later.

[Adventure1]

[Adventure1]

[lino]

Let me start off with this:

 

Happiness is a skill.

 

The more you try to master it, the easier everything gets in life.

[Adventure1]

Let me start off with this:

 

Happiness is a skill.

 

The more you try to master it, the easier everything gets in life.

 

hence

 

Be kind to your self in thought and in action