I have a serious problem

[zazaza]

Sounds weird but,

many people I have encountered in my city seem to be possessed by demons.

 

Some people seem really cool in the beginning.

I might spend months with them and they're very respectful and humble.

 

Then suddenly, i see their real nature is one of selfishness or even psychopathy.

I need to know which people in my immediate environment are _plain evil_

 

How do i know when someone can be trusted or not?

I cannot afford continuing to keep the wrong people getting involved in my life.

 

 

 

It seems that sometimes the people I try to feed want to bite of my arm!

Edited December 9, 2009 by zazaza

[Ryan T.]

My experience is that it is not if people will screw you over, it is when.

 

I still always try to give people the benefit of the doubt, whatever the situation might be.

 

I would try to keep in mind that people are inconsistent creatures with a lot of competing forces in their lives.

 

Maybe you just need to be a little more guarded in your relationships.

[Pero]

It seems that sometimes the people I try to feed want to bite of my arm!

 

So stop trying to feed them.

[doc benway]

I think the issue has to do with expectations.

If you have an idea of how the other person should behave and they deviate from your expectation, you feel betrayed.

Why is there any expectation?

It generally means that you are trying to control that person in some way.

Let go of all expectations for behavior.

Become an expert in your own behavior.

All motivation is selfish - some is just more obvious and crude, others more subtle and refined.

If you really understand yourself, you'll have insight into others.

I think it's a good place to start.

[zazaza]

I have relatively good insight into myself.

I don't have expectations per se,

 

yet every person i encounter is unhappy.

I have been there, and i know that people can become blissfull

if only they take back control of themself.

 

 

 

So stop trying to feed them.

It is too dangerous to preach in these times

where many people's hearts have become icecold you mean?

 

 

 

 

I don't seek guru status. People don't need to give me anything.

I just offer my advice to people who want to accept it.

 

I want to protect myself from being around hostile people again.

You can easily recognize many of the hostiles,

 

but some of them can disguise it VERY well.

How can i spot the evil people who have become experts at appearing innocent?

Edited December 9, 2009 by zazaza

[Pero]

It is too dangerous to preach in these times

where many people's hearts have become icecold you mean?

 

Maybe it's not so easy to get somewhere with preaching.

 

I want to protect myself from being around hostile people again.

You can easily recognize many of the hostiles,

 

What exactly do you mean by "hostile people"?

[zazaza]

Maybe it's not so easy to get somewhere with preaching.

What exactly do you mean by "hostile people"?

maybe i should indeed change my tactics.

 

with hostiles i mean psychopaths & evil ones.

i have met some people like that already,

 

which leads me to doubt several friends and close people i have.

how i can be sure of peoples real nature?

 

I think only time can tell.

Edited December 9, 2009 by zazaza

[Pero]

with hostiles i mean psychopaths & evil ones.

 

I still don't really understand this. Maybe because I can't remember anyone whom I'd think of as a psychopath or evil.

 

Have you ever wondered why you come in contact with these people?

[zazaza]

Have you ever wondered why you come in contact with these people?

They live among the crowds and act like regular people.

In some of them you can see it easily, in other people you can't cause they disguise themselves really well.

 

 

 

Maybe i need a psychic power so i can read peoples minds better.

I'm already pretty good, but like i say.. some people are very good actors.

 

A psychic power would be the perfect solution to my needs!

Edited December 9, 2009 by zazaza

[DalTheJigsaw123]

I have relatively good insight into myself.

I don't have expectations per se,

 

yet every person i encounter is unhappy.

I have been there, and i know that people can become blissfull

if only they take back control of themself.

It is too dangerous to preach in these times

where many people's hearts have become icecold you mean?

I don't seek guru status. People don't need to give me anything.

I just offer my advice to people who want to accept it.

 

I want to protect myself from being around hostile people again.

You can easily recognize many of the hostiles,

 

but some of them can disguise it VERY well.

How can i spot the evil people who have become experts at appearing innocent?

 

Interesting.

I thought I was the only one.

I stopped attracting vampires who feed off my energy.

By ignoring them and not letting them continue.

Stop giving them your energy and they will stop feeding on you.

[zazaza]

Interesting.

I thought I was the only one.

I stopped attracting vampires who feed off my energy.

By ignoring them and not letting them continue.

Stop giving them your energy and they will stop feeding on you.

I don't feel drained by encounters with anyone.

I just have a lot of energy which i want to share to the whole world,

 

although i will probably have to start using this energy in a safer and wiser way.

[Pero]

They live among the crowds and act like regular people.

In some of them you can see it easily, in other people you can't cause they disguise themselves really well.

Maybe i need a psychic power so i can read peoples minds better.

I'm already pretty good, but like i say.. some people are very good actors.

 

That's not an answer to my question.

Don't you think it's strange that among all the people out there you encounter the "evil" ones?

[zazaza]

That's not an answer to my question.

Don't you think it's strange that among all the people out there you encounter the "evil" ones?

Yeah, guess i'll have to think that true.

And change my tactics.

 

I'd still like to know about good way to see people's real intentions,

when they are very good actors.

[C T]

 

 

I'd still like to know about good way to see people's real intentions,

when they are very good actors.

Do you really expect to find your answer here?

 

Have you deeply considered the immensity of your 'dilemma'?

 

Even parents are eternally puzzled in attempting to understand their children's 'real' intentions.

 

Think about that.

Edited December 9, 2009 by CowTao

[Apech]

My experience is that it is better not to trust people. I don't mean this in a paranoid way, I just mean that in placing trust in someone you are generating expectations of them which they are almost certain to fall short of. This is true of everyone, with the possible exception of those with whom you form intimate bonds and with whom there is a tacit agreement to work through problems.

 

Wishing people well is OK - in fact this is the right thing. You can be positive about others without trusting them. People are confused and the real nature of reality is hidden from them. In this state they find it difficult to act correctly and may do things which seem to you (or anyone) evil - but they can't necessarily see that themselves. Its weird because everyone is potentially free and enlightened but they choose to be selfish and stupid instead. Working on yourself - cultivation - creates a gap between you and others for this reason I find.

 

Just my thoughts.

 

A7.

 

 

PS. Its easy to see their intentions - just use your feelings, suspend your thoughts and 'ask' - if you see what I mean - but we often block the answer cos its a bit difficult to take.

Edited December 9, 2009 by apepch7

[zazaza]

PS. Its easy to see their intentions - just use your feelings, suspend your thoughts and 'ask' - if you see what I mean - but we often block the answer cos its a bit difficult to take.

care to be more detailed.

[lino]

Sounds weird but,

many people I have encountered in my city seem to be possessed by demons.

 

Some people seem really cool in the beginning.

I might spend months with them and they're very respectful and humble.

 

Then suddenly, i see their real nature is one of selfishness or even psychopathy.

I need to know which people in my immediate environment are _plain evil_

 

How do i know when someone can be trusted or not?

I cannot afford continuing to keep the wrong people getting involved in my life.

It seems that sometimes the people I try to feed want to bite of my arm!

 

People are not going to be perfect all of the time.

 

If you run into people that seem to be perfect in the huge majority of exchanges

that you seem to have and have a "blip" every once in a while...and don't want them

 

...please send them to me

[Apech]

care to be more detailed.

 

Well I'm not going to give you a formula/method if that's what you mean - cos you need to find your own - and its not about that anyway. Our minds filter what gets through like mad - and we build all sorts of assumptions about people on top of that. Also most people operate through a self-concept which is a kind of con. They present themselves as this sort of person and so on - and I say its a con because they don't really know themselves. Knowing yourself is a very high art - a very developed state. So if someone comes to you saying 'look at me I'm like this ...' then it is that you cannot trust - and funnily enough neither can the person saying it - because they don't know their own response in certain situations.

[Gerard]

I would try to keep in mind that people are inconsistent creatures with a lot of competing forces in their lives...

 

Fully agree! Predatory animals. We share with the animal kingdom the same physical realm so we cannot be that different; however humans can be worse than animals as we are capable of very evil acts just for pleasure whereas they don't. Chimps are close to us and are capable of bad human behaviour (including cannibalism).

 

Anyway, most humans perceive spirituality as a sign of weakness, so be careful with telling about your practices to unawakened humans, it can backfire you. Understand now why traditionally Taoists were so secretive about their practices?

[3L3VAT3]

My 2 cents:

the first law of nature is self-preservation! You can always count on people to act in their own interest, it doesn't mean that they are bad... it's part of their human nature!! Don't get mad at it... you wouldnt' get mad at a dog if you left it in front of a big juicy steak saying "don't eat this steak, dog, your better than that"... then get surprised/upset when fido gobbles that up! Its a good dog otherwise but It's its nature to eat that delicious steak! Same with people, it's in their nature to act in their own self interest (same with you)...

 

As far as EXTREMELY selfish (you said evil/psychopathic) or people who are f-ing with your interests; yea cut them off!! Like a dog that eats steaks is ok (dont leave em in front of him) but one that eats your face off is a problem!!

 

what kind of behavior is it that your classifying as evil n psychopathic?

 

Also, take a look at your own motivations... in my experience "nice" people aren't raelly all that nice... but it's just a mask... passive aggressive maybe...

 

read 'the 48 laws of power' for a much more in depth example of human nature...

[zazaza]

My dear friends and enemies,

I will try to be more careful in the future.

 

One of my faults has been that i was being myself too much.

It's better to look like a copy of everyone else - this avoids getting attention from the wrong

kind of people.

 

Many good advice has been contributed to this topic,

thank you for that.

 

 

I'm not in to too much trouble yet, I think.

I just had some experiences the past few days which have been a wake-up call.

Edited December 10, 2009 by zazaza

[manitou]

People can only be trusted to be people. After all, we're an imperfect bunch of talking monkeys.

If one is attracting bad situation after bad situation, this is a dynamic of your own creation. Discovering the need to fix one person after another will be helpful. It will probably stem from a memory in your youth, corresponding with a fear, most likely. When you find the memory which is causing the repeated exposure to off-balance people (you may have had one in your life when you were young, and it is your 'comfort level' to be chronically exposed to this type of anger, etc - this is my particular affliction too), you can imprint the memory "to the opposite". This is a dynamic that is addressed in shamanic practices, by going into the soul. This is a form of shamanic soul retreival which is found at the base of your memory.

We also are mirrors of each other. I bring out in others exactly what I need, you do the same. Don't look for answers in the people you meet. Look for answers within.

[lino]

For now, don't dwell on their faults too much.

 

People try to be around people that have characteristics they want to emulate.

 

A "blip" here and there really isn't bad, nobody is going to be perfect all of the time.

[Guest paul walter]

You are right to not trust people as they don't trust themselves and lack the self awareness, therefore self-regulation, that would engender trust. But, distrust and misanthropy are not the answers as ,apart from taking a lot of energy to maintain, they tend to make you into the thing you most despise (except it's diffrent for you cause you are only protecting yourself from others ,and around and around it goes- I think that's called history personal or national). Most of the prophetic wisdom traditions say we are living in a man-made hell right now and that people are little better than robots/wild animals in their ailities to relate to life/themselves. I see nothing at all to contradict that view. Of course some people have done some work on themselves and are not so much of a threat and you may 'find' them.... I take it you are on the youngish side zazaza-in which case I'd say you've got a snow-flakes hope in hell of meeting someone you consider sane this side of 40.

 

The only way I can think of to help you know in advance if someone can be 'trusted' is to push the limits of socially accepted relations. Do things like tell the truth, wear what you want, say what you feel, be thoughtful, kind--if there's anyone still around after all this the they can probably be "trusted". As in scientific experiments, you don't really get to know the properties of beings until they've been prodded and subjected to things outside their comfort zone- then you can look back and see what remains of the interaction.

 

Also, if you don't trust your own perceptions in regards to adjudicating people then check the 'Tao te Ching'. It's the best guide I know of for filtering and bullshit-detecting-it reminds us of what 'real' life can be/what we can be and are best at being (sane). Though if you don't want to follow the sage path and take responsibility for your own reactions or understand the why's of why we think we 'need' others in ways that are dangerous, then you have to be prepared to accept the consequences of 'collaboration' with a society/culture you are so obviously at odds with. Just food for thought

[Janell]

What can someone take from you if you have nothing to take?

 

What can someone do to you, unless you want them to?

 

You can trust other people, about as well as you can trust your self.