Ladies Only--Witch's lefthand path for kundalini

[witch]

Look down. Is there a penis? Then get out! Particularly if you are practicing any kind of retention!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I recently lost my "magic powers" through a Shakti device mishap, with me bungling the very clear and obvious directions. But I think it was a fortuitous accident, because now I have to start from scratch but I already know where I'm going. I was going to post this down in my practice journal, but I thought some ladies might want to join me, and being a sociable person, I decided to post it up here.

 

Five warnings:

 

First, this path is expensive. You have to buy a lot of things, and that's just the way it is.

 

Second, this path is going to bring you A LOT of male attention, even if you don't tell a soul what you are doing. If you aren't comfortable with that prospect, don't try this at home kids!

 

Third, you can't be skinny and do this, it won't work. So if you like that bony look and want to stay a size 2, this isn't for you.

 

Fourth, this sets off strong energy if it works, so be grounded. Have a job, have a routine, have common sense, preferably have a man knocking about who is open to having more sex.

 

Fifth, and I know this sounds silly but there it is, if this works for you and you get the whole nine yards--spontaneously orgasmic, heart energy outpourings, powerful kundalini energy at will, you have to give me something. It doesn't have to be something expensive, it can even be a found object, but it has to be a pretty thing. This is Hathor's path and she likes red and gold things. And she insists! You have to box it up and mail it to me. But this is only if it works, and not just libido increase or whatnot, only if you have the full kundalini thing.

 

That said, there are some preliminaries. First, buy my book (it's very cheap used ) and go on my diet for at least three months before starting the rest. Including the gyneflex exercises, those are very important for this. Do those three times a week for twenty minutes without fail. You can get my book at amazon--The Orgasmic Diet by Marrena Lindberg.

 

Second, you need male pheromones. Of course the easiest thing is if you have a virile man knocking around, and by virile I mean his shape isn't like a potato. Have him take a shower and then exercise vigorously wearing a clean T-shirt and no deoderant for a good long time, until he builds up a sweat. Do the gyneflex exercises with the armpit of the T-shirt near your nose. The Athena Institute has quality male pheromones if you are currently single. Don't put them on you--if you have an aromatherapy thingummy you can add a couple drops to whatever oil you like to diffuse.

 

After you've done my diet for three months, your body will be ready for the next phase, which is snakes and porn and dirty writing. I did mention this was a lefthand path! Continue the diet, continue the exercises, and start watching porn every night right before you go to bed, at least twenty minutes, maybe a half hour. Don't get lesbian porn or porn with a storyline. Get gonzo porn with lots of cocks. Nothing degrading for its own sake like ATM, but gangbangs are good, and women giving blowjobs and getting facials. The sort of porn that you would never in a million years find a turn on. Also try your hand at writing naughty stories--figure out what really does turn you on. And watch youtube videos of snakes--I'll try to round up some good ones. Preferably lots of snakes together.

 

Again, do not do those things until you have been on my diet for three months--otherwise you will simply horrify yourself. You have to change your body before any of it can have a good effect.

 

Also, start waking up your root chakra as much as possible. Use a Keeper or Mooncup during your period. When it isn't your period, try some variation of Smartballs, you should have acquired enough PC muscle strength to walk around with Smartballs or what porn shops call ben wa balls--not real ben wa balls, but hollow plastic balls with a marble inside, connected by a string, and coated in rubber or some rubber-like substance. Try spending a day with them inside.

 

Comments? I'm expecting plenty of Obviously, this sort of thing is not for every woman, but it sure did work for me.

Edited December 10, 2009 by witch

[witch]

*sigh* Everybody thinks I am crazy.

[markern]

I think someone said the other day that Dr Glenns Kundalini woke up when he was watching porn. Is that right? Can`t remember even though I did read Pathnotes. If so then maybe you are on to something witch

[Biff]

*sigh* Everybody thinks I am crazy.

 

Err, actually that gave me a boner. I'm not kidding at all. Having a boner at work is crap when you want to go get a drink.

[Kameel]

I don't believe he was watching porn, but he did have trouble with ejaculation while the energy was transmuting (black outs)

Anyways, I heard this joke and it reminds me of this thread- Is your kundalini rising, or are you just happy to see me?

[Biff]

*sigh* Everybody thinks I am crazy.

 

BTW you should do your own site/blog (if you haven't already)

 

I don't believe he was watching porn, but he did have trouble with ejaculation while the energy was transmuting (black outs)

Anyways, I heard this joke and it reminds me of this thread- Is your kundalini rising, or are you just happy to see me?

 

Actually I do remember reading that he was rubbing one of in the middle of the room while watching porn and then he got some pain or something. Santi would know for sure. Sorry witch! looks like a bunch of males have hijacked the thread!!

[witch]

Can't say I didn't warn you of the effects!

 

Anyhow, I don't think any of this is conducive to kundalini rising in men, from what I've read on this site. You're supposed to think pure thoughts and the semen retention and 100 days and all that. And even if you don't do all that, doing what I'm recommending women do would simply drain all the sexual energy out of men immediately.

 

Although I should say, women shouldn't use vibrators doing this. Can have as many clitoral orgasms as you like, but using hands only.

 

Vaginal orgasms, on the other hand, knock yourself out, although leave out the vibrating things.

 

Women should also eat a lot of manfood. I toned that part down in my book to be PC, but women doing this should eat lots of red meat--red fatty meat and butter. And drink wine and beer, although in moderation. Too much will interfere with sexual response.

 

mmmm...boners.

 

Oh, and yes, I did have my own forum for a while. And don't get me started on blogs! I have a problem with blogs, much better to be part of a community, with plenty of feedback and communication.

 

Dr. Morris got his kundalini rising through watching porn? I'd like to know more, quite curious. Didn't know men could follow this path.

 

Also forgot to add--once you start watching porn, you can exercise the PC muscles with the Gyneflex while watching so it doesn't take up too much time. Multitasking!

[Kameel]

Why no vibrators? Too stimulating to nerve endings; therefore, dulling response?

[witch]

No. Too draining of sexual energy. A vibrator forces a woman to have an orgasm, even if she isn't sexually aroused. A vibrator will give multiple orgasms when the body isn't ready for it and take all the energy. Most importantly, vibrators are for clitoral orgasms, and clitoral orgasms are very different things than vaginal orgasms, just like a prostate orgasm is very different than a traditional ejaculatory orgasm in men. Oftentimes arousal for one drops arousal for the other.

[Aetherous]

Didn't know men could follow this path.

 

Once a man can transmute, then anytime he is stimulated, his energy will rise without effort. Blue lily seems to help.

 

However, what you do with the energy afterward, is what I consider to be important.

[witch]

Well yes, that I know--once a man knows how to send it up he can get turned on and send it up--hence Drew Hempel scoping the hotties at his local fastfood joints. But for men who aren't opened upstairs yet, watching a lot of porn isn't going to help the process!

[Ninpo-me-this-ninjutsu-me-that]

 

 

Dr. Morris got his kundalini rising through watching porn? I'd like to know more, quite curious. Didn't know men could follow this path.

 

 

 

 

pg. 31/path notes of an american ninja master

 

Tien tao kung fu/kundalini

 

watching porn and doing the obvious : 'suddenly a tremendous burst of energy ripped up my back and hit the base of my skull. The pain was so intense i fell to my knees. i wanted to vomit. ( further on ) ' from that day for the next six months sex was not a pleasure.'

 

further down page 31 he says the problem was not keeping the tongue up when meditating as well as reversing the orbits occasionally.

 

The actual kundalini awakening is on pg 33 when he was on his back porch. It's a seperate incident, not at the same time. But if you read the book he went through a lot of pain before that awakening because of the damage already done.

[witch]

Oh the poor man! Well it sounds like it wasn't the porn itself that had anything to do with the process of his kundalini rising, just something that might have set off an energy surge. Am I right? He was already orbiting and meditating and so forth.

[ShaktiMama]

Hi witch,

 

My name is Susan and I co-teach Kundalini Awakening with Santi (Vajrasattva).

 

I saw your topic and I thought, "wow, a reason for me to join Tbums."

 

Love to talk with you about kundalini and women.

 

May the joy of Shakti gently flow,

 

Susan

 

PS. I am making rounds at the hospitals. I am an RN Quality Resource Coordinator for Kaiser Permanente which is like a case manager on steroids. Then I have to head over for the departmental Christmas party of cold cuts. Yummm (sarcasm); because of cutbacks no Maggiano's this year. So I will check in later.

 

oh...and i just wanted to add my "who I am" bio

http://www.kundaliniawakening.com/who-we-are.html

Edited December 10, 2009 by ShaktiMama

[Ninpo-me-this-ninjutsu-me-that]

Oh the poor man! Well it sounds like it wasn't the porn itself that had anything to do with the process of his kundalini rising, just something that might have set off an energy surge. Am I right? He was already orbiting and meditating and so forth.

 

Yes, he was already developing the energy, so he had a lot of it and: 'I was feeling like a twenty year old, semi-erect all the time', so he just kind of put the porn on, it wasn't any part of the practice.

 

edit: Ps. Hello susan/shaktimama and welcome. I'll leave the Glenn stuff to you. Nice to see you here, I'm sure you will make a great addition to the site

Edited December 10, 2009 by Ninpo-me-this-ninjutsu-me-that

[Biff]

Didn't know men could follow this path.

 

Yes of course they can. But there is no point even talking about it here in detail.... In some ways it works like healing, the more you give the more you get back. The thing is though, after your system is 'rewired' you orgasm differently anyway.

 

 

Hi witch,

 

My name is Susan and I co-teach Kundalini Awakening with Santi (Vajrasattva).

 

I saw your topic and I thought, "wow, a reason for me to join Tbums."

 

Love to talk with you about kundalini and women.

 

May the joy of Shakti gently flow,

 

Susan

 

PS. I am making rounds at the hospitals. I am an RN Quality Resource Coordinator for Kaiser Permanente which is like a case manager on steroids. Then I have to head over for the departmental Christmas party of cold cuts. Yummm (sarcasm); because of cutbacks no Maggiano's this year. So I will check in later.

 

oh...and i just wanted to add my "who I am" bio

http://www.kundaliniawakening.com/who-we-are.html

 

Wow! it's an honour to have another Goddess in our presence *humble bow*. Welcome

[witch]

Hi witch,

 

My name is Susan and I co-teach Kundalini Awakening with Santi (Vajrasattva).

 

I saw your topic and I thought, "wow, a reason for me to join Tbums."

 

Love to talk with you about kundalini and women.

 

May the joy of Shakti gently flow,

 

Susan

 

PS. I am making rounds at the hospitals. I am an RN Quality Resource Coordinator for Kaiser Permanente which is like a case manager on steroids. Then I have to head over for the departmental Christmas party of cold cuts. Yummm (sarcasm); because of cutbacks no Maggiano's this year. So I will check in later.

 

oh...and i just wanted to add my "who I am" bio

http://www.kundaliniawakening.com/who-we-are.html

 

Wow, it IS a small world--I think I know who you are, now that I've seen your picture. Several years back when all of this started happening and I was kind of freaked, I was hunting around online, one of the reasons I ended up here. I joined a yahoo group, can't remember the name, I think it was a yahoo group, and described my experiences which were pretty much laughed at--which I can totally relate to! I mean, I laugh at me. I think you thought I was nutty, although when I told you about the weird electrical problems I keep having you said I might be onto something. The old IT guy here at work hated me, I kept busting his computers. Somebody said I was a Sheela Na Gig, and then I got a little alarmed because a couple guys wanted to pay me for my heart energy, to fly to me and get my heart energy, so I quit the group.

 

Oh, I should also add that I think at the time I was trying to be mainstream and downplay the kundalini stuff because I was promoting my book, didn't want to freak anybody out. Another reason to keep the tantric stuff on the downlow. But now that I've been on Katie Morgan's show playing with a vulva puppet and orgasming on camera, there really isn't much mainstream conformity for me to lose, now is there!

 

You had it rise in the mid-90's too? Also spontaneously? TOTALLY none of my business but do you have an Eris fire singleton in your astrological chart? That would mean the only fire planet in your chart is Eris, in other words none of your other planets are in Aries, Leo or Sagittarius.

Edited December 10, 2009 by witch

[Biff]

start watching porn every night right before you go to bed, at least twenty minutes, maybe a half hour. Don't get lesbian porn or porn with a storyline.

 

Just an FYI for the ladies here ( ) you can watch great free porn on redtube.com. Plenty of big veiny cocks on there. Unless you want HD porn.

[witch]

Jerk off videos are great too, and there's a ton of them EVERYPLACE online. Those are nice because they aren't the exhausted Viagraed porn cocks, they have lots of vim. But most women can't lie down and watch their computer screen; you can't do gyneflex exercises sitting up.

[witch]

Hi witch,

 

My name is Susan and I co-teach Kundalini Awakening with Santi (Vajrasattva).

 

I saw your topic and I thought, "wow, a reason for me to join Tbums."

 

Love to talk with you about kundalini and women.

 

May the joy of Shakti gently flow,

 

Susan

 

PS. I am making rounds at the hospitals. I am an RN Quality Resource Coordinator for Kaiser Permanente which is like a case manager on steroids. Then I have to head over for the departmental Christmas party of cold cuts. Yummm (sarcasm); because of cutbacks no Maggiano's this year. So I will check in later.

 

oh...and i just wanted to add my "who I am" bio

http://www.kundaliniawakening.com/who-we-are.html

 

Bother, so startled that I knew you that I didn't properly welcome you! Thank you for posting in my thread, and I would love to talk with you about a woman's way to raise kundalini. Obviously you are way ahead of me on this path, although I'm probably more on the darker side of things. But maybe not.

Edited December 10, 2009 by witch

[Kameel]

So happy to have Susan here (and Witch). Welcome. This forum can always benefit from more female input.

 

And Biff- your avatar transformation in just a few short months has been amazing

[JustARandomPanda]

Well I'm signing up.

 

Although...*sigh* it looks like I am going to have to get serious about dumping my addiction to Diet Coke. Yeah..yeah...I know the stuff is evil. I don't need that lecture yet again. My family reminds me constantly of how evil it is.

[witch]

For you there is a preliminary step. When I said getting a vibrator will force your body to have an orgasm--that's what you need to do first, force your body to have an orgasm. If you've tried vibrators before and they haven't worked, get this baby:

 

http://www.eroscillator.com/

 

It is the jackhammer of vibrators, that thing could give a screaming orgasm to a mummy. If it's too pricey (it's very expensive), get a Hitachi Magic Wand.

[lino]

For you there is a preliminary step. When I said getting a vibrator will force your body to have an orgasm--that's what you need to do first, force your body to have an orgasm. If you've tried vibrators before and they haven't worked, get this baby:

 

http://www.eroscillator.com/

 

It is the jackhammer of vibrators, that thing could give a screaming orgasm to a mummy. If it's too pricey (it's very expensive), get a Hitachi Magic Wand.

 

 

Watch out

 

Some of the people here might start using that thing like if it was an Aneros

[Kameel]

Question for Witch and Susan- Have you had any contact/interaction with Mystress Angelique Serpent?

(I believe she took a KAP class with Glenn years ago).

Thanks.

Edited December 10, 2009 by Kameel