Spiritual empathy! Where is the off switch?!

[Trogdorf]

[King Kabalabhati]

SFQ or other good system will build up your own magnetic field so you wont be as vulnerable to others' energies. I find, especially now that I've been doing SFQ, that I can more easily tolerate other peoples' confusion and emotions without making them my own. Of course you seem much more sensitive to begin with, so more advanced advice / quidance could be needed.

[soaring crane]

Does anyone know a way that I can protect my spirit from other spirits/ emotions? Because it's not as fun as it may sound. In-fact, it is drastically impeding me from living a normal life.

 

Well, there are a lot of systems and methods that you can learn and they're all good, over time. Let's see what kind of suggestions pop up here.

But, from my perspective, for the immediate, since you can't yet control the "invasions", I suggest you control your reactions to them. Do not "hate bearing other peoples crap all the time", that reaction only feeds the problem. Do you understand that reasoning? Force yourself instead to observe what happens and put a lot of effort into remaining neutral about it.

Practice very diligently the art of discernment - that means identify what is coming from you and what is not. If you can meditate well with imagery, put the foreign energies in a glass bottle where you can observe them, like a biologist observing a lab specimen. Put the bottle on a shelf in a storage room, and close the door.

If that's too abstract, then practice saying, "NO", and really mean it. Let the foreign emotion or pain swell up and when it's reached a peak, say, "NO", very firmly, strict, like a strict father keeping his kid in line. If you can, do this out loud, don't hold anything back, yell it out! If that's inconvenient, you can do it internally as well. And after you do that, smile, outwardly and inwardly. Smile at yourself

Stopping the attachments before they happen takes a lot of practice, for someone like you. That's why I recommend, for now, controlling your reactions to the situation and refusing to suffer. The more in touch you are with your own middle, though, the better it'll all work.

This isn't much different than those times when someone first takes up meditation, thinking that the "goal" is to subdue the flood of thoughts going through the head. They get annoyed with themselves when it doesn't "click" for them. But what they miss out on, often because nobody told them the "secret", is that it isn't the flood of thoughts but rather the reaction to the flood, the dam of annoyance they put up, that spoils their experience.

Good Luck!

 

 

 

[Sloppy Zhang]

I've started to feel more empathetic just as a result of normal practice.

 

It's like any other sense- at first you can't control it, but after a while you are able to manage it.

 

Take hearing for example. You hear pretty much every auditory stimulus that reaches your ear. Your mind, however, doesn't always respond to it.

 

It's like people from the country who move to the big city. At first they can't sleep because they hear cars going outside their window all the time, and light comes in through their window and it's too bright to sleep. After a while though they can sleep fine. It's not that they don't hear it, they just don't let it bother them any more.

 

And if they try to listen they can still hear the cars and what's going on outside.

 

So now is just that starting transition phase, of learning that you can feel.

[Marblehead]

Hi All,

 

Excellent comments so far.

 

Hi Trogdorf,

 

You have a capability that you cannot change. What you have is good. Don't try to destroy it. Rather, learn how to use that energy. Learn how to change the negative that these experiences cause within you into positive energy.

 

You need to understand that there are some events in your life that you can do nothing about. Experience them, embrace them, then let them go.

 

Peace & Love!

[joeblast]

Hi All,

 

Excellent comments so far.

 

Hi Trogdorf,

 

You have a capability that you cannot change. What you have is good. Don't try to destroy it. Rather, learn how to use that energy. Learn how to change the negative that these experiences cause within you into positive energy.

 

You need to understand that there are some events in your life that you can do nothing about. Experience them, embrace them, then let them go.

 

Peace & Love!

we need a thumbs up smiley

 

transmute! when you get those feelings, figure out a practice that will utilize the energy, do something with it!

[witch]

Find a person to bond with. Then you will mostly hear that person, and the other people will become fainter. Choose carefully!

[Encephalon]

There is no need to complicate the issue. Your heart is opening and you care about others; you should take comfort in the knowledge that you aren't a sociopath! All the advice you can get here will enable you to continue to feel the the pain of others without becoming derailed by it. In TCM, a deficiency of the Earth element can leave you vulnerable to grief, sadness and depression. But one can correct for that, and at your age, you've got plenty of time.

 

Ken Wilber has a great presentation on the capacity for the kind of deep empathy that is painful and yet empowering. It's cheap to leave you with youtube links, but it's highly worth it if you can spare 10 minutes.

 

[soaring crane]

Hey Peeps,

As an example:

A couple of years ago, a work colleague's friend killed himself.. I arrived at work and was not sure if he would be in that day. Before I even saw him I felt a sadness like I have never felt before! I felt like crying.

HIS PAIN BECAME MY PAIN!

 

It happens with everyone and in every situation. I can even feel the emotional imprints left in houses/ areas aswell.

Being me is like living in a matrix of varying emotions and intents!

 

I really don't want to contradict people, and I usually just let things lie, but I'm not convinced the others are really reading your post closely. Yes, "accept" your "gift" and "learn" how to "use" the "energy" (sounds great, thumbs up, but, how? Anybody care to fill in the gaps? And what do all those words in quotation marks actually mean anyway?)

 

No, I really think you need to take a more active role in your problem, because it is a problem, at the moment. And it's unfortunately one that can get worse with time if you don't get a grip on it. It isn't just empathy. It's something that happens to some people and it's not so easy to just turn around and say, "hey, I'm special, I feel everyone's pain, wow, cool".

 

IF the solution turns out to be simply accepting it as something special, which could be the case if the idea had never occurred to you before, and IF it really is a relief when that happens, then that would be fantastic. The greatest. So, give it a try. But if the problem persists, then you truly have to do more than that. (I've been around the corner a couple times with this particular situation...)

Edited January 29, 2010 by soaring crane

[markern]

Could this be a spleen issue? As I understand the spleen is involved with overempathy and identifying to much with other peoples emotions but this might be something different as it involves picking up left over energies in empty rooms etc. Anyway equanimty should be important. Mindfulness (awareness/sensitiveity) is always coupled with and balanced by equanimity. Grounding should help as it helps in not getting pulled into stuff you don`t want.

 

My meditation teacher said that he dealt with other peoples energies by just mindfully recognising that htese are not his energies. For me that helped a lot as I sort of merged them with my own. Now they flow more through me instead.

 

KAPs psychic self defense should have some stuff to ward of bad energies.

[Aetherous]

Standing every morning, and a good session of belly breathing when you leave the situation and have some alone time.

 

You must help yourself before you can help others.

[Marblehead]

Yes, "accept" your "gift" and "learn" how to "use" the "energy" (sounds great, thumbs up, but, how? Anybody care to fill in the gaps? And what do all those words in quotation marks actually mean anyway?)

 

 

Hi Soaring Crane,

 

I would love to fill in the gaps. Problem is, I cannot see into his mind. I have no idea what actions to suggest. Filling in the gap can be done by only the experiencer. I cannot walk in another persons shoes - I cannot feel their emotions.

 

Trogdorf has a special gift. He is naturally capable of empathy. Many people do not have that capability.

 

I think that when we can feel the pain of others we are in a much better position to help where we can. Sometimes when a person has problems they cannot find an answer to all they need is for someone to listen to them and understand what they are going through. An empathetic person can do this.

 

No, the empathetic person cannot always help, cannot even make suggestions sometimes. If the empathetic person is young they will have few personal experiences on which to draw so suggestions would not even be possible.

 

But for the empathetic person, it should be considered a good thing that they can so easily connect with others, to feel there pain as well as their joy and happiness. Being apathetic does not only include feeling others' pain, it includes all the other feelings and emotions as well. The joy this persons gains from one can be transferred to someone else who is in need. The empathetic person has lost no energy in the process.

 

Again, I cannot give Trogdorf any direct suggestions because I know nothing of his life and his environment. For me to suggest that I know these things would be foolish. It is up to him to find ways to use this gift of his. Just think, if all consolers had this gift how much more good could they do in helping people with problems?

 

Peace & Love!

[ShaktiMama]

[Encephalon]

I started taking raspberry leaf tea about a week ago when I read that it works wonders for healing adrenal exhaustion brought on my a lifetime of stress and caffeine consumption. I found it in bulk at our local health food store for $1.31/oz., so I can easily afford to drink four cups a day.

http://www.jcrows.com/remarkableraspberry.html

Edited January 29, 2010 by Blasto

[Trogdorf]

[Ya Mu]

[Sloppy Zhang]

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