NOT letting everything be as it is

[Cameron]

I think my most important work this year is to gradually, slowly, patiently learn to let everything be as it is. It is becoming painfully real to me that we-myself and others-seem to compulsively be stuck in this hampster wheel of manipulating our lives.

 

Whether it is in regards to our work and business, daily realationships and interactions with people and life. It is like we have to constantly control and manipulate our experience rather than allow whatever is happening to happen.

 

I think the Taoist and Zen teachings(As well as other interesting teachings I am just getting into like Adveda Vedanta, Guirdjieff, Eckhart Tolle) have alot to do with not manipulating our experience. To be with ourselves and our lives fully. To not rush, complicate, control and force things unnaturally.

 

It is both a painful and pleasurable thing to do since when I can-ever so fleetingly and briefly-open to the unknown and let everything be as it is-that is both a very empowering and very scary act. Sometimes I feel like breaking down and crying and do so. Sometimes I am aware of a great joy inside. Sometimes rage and anger comes up. Ultimately, why can't we be with and allow rather than manipulate? We don't trust. We don't trust ourselves and others. It is a process of letting go and learning to trust ourselves and others even if they don't trust. It is hard but really the only way I think to become a human being again.

Edited February 9, 2006 by Cameron

[freeform]

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Edited October 23, 2019 by freeform