Disturbing conclusion

[markern]

If you were born in 1986 that explains everything. Fire tiger. Well nothing better than Vipassana for you to cool your fire down and open a path that you'll fully enjoy. That's my recommendation for you.

 

Good luck.

 

 

I was born in early may 1978 what does that say about me?

[zhoupeng]

Non, do you honestly believe that a woman (or anybody for that matter) would actually enjoy being with somebody who made them suffer or caused them pain? Unless you are talking about somebody who is disturbed here, in which case I don't know why you would want to be with that person anyway, people in general want to be around somebody who makes them feel GOOD. Who makes them feel happy and confident about his or her self. That's what most people want. Think about it, do you enjoy being around people who cause you pain? Probably not...but hey who knows. Like some other people have been saying here, the reason girls like to be around these jerks or assholes sometimes is because at least these guys have some sort of spine. Some sort of confidence. And that is better than a "nice guy" people pleaser with absolutely no backbone. It's like choosing between the lesser of two evils. They don't go for jerks because of the pain these guys cause or because of their jerkish or asshole like behavior itself. It's about the confidence. Now of course you can be a good person and not be a people pleaser. You can follow the golden rule and still not be a people pleaser. You can be a good guy and still stand up for yourself and have a spine. That is the guy that a woman really wants. Hell, it is the kind of person that anyone, man or woman, would like to be in a relationship with or be around.

 

This is an Excellent Post. Thank you very much for sharing!

[Gerard]

Cool! Is it that simple to say the year and get a recommendation on path?

 

Well I have met many people born in a fire year doing Vipassana and being hermits or monks/nuns.

 

The year of birth is determinant when establishing the major energetics of the individual, 5 elements theory one more time.

 

 

These are not definitions, it is all about energy; you cannot escape yin and yang unless you reach paranirvana.

 

 

I was born in early may 1978 what does that say about me?

 

 

That you are a hardheaded (Taurean) earth horse, LOL. Btw, I am the fire type, so a wandering monk here.

[Birch]

"These are not definitions, it is all about energy; you cannot escape yin and yang unless you reach paranirvana."

 

;-)

 

Which would be jing-shen-void-shatter void? I don't know what it is (yet;-)) So if you're choosing path for example, do you lean opposite to your dominant element, do you strengthen your weakest, etc? Both? What about "wuxing" which I keep hearing about?

And is birthday date pre-heaven or sudden post-heaven? Or maybe it doesn't matter that much?

 

I keep trying to get my 5 pillars in various online engines and I keep ending up with contradictory information. Taomeow, any recommendations for best source?

 

Thanks!

 

Kate

[RyanO]

Wouldn't year of birth be a too simplistic astrological diagnosis? If that were the case students would be a lot more like others in their grade

 

I understand the logic behind astrology, but I think the influence of the stars/seasons/etc. may be a little over our heads

[Mattimo]

Non,

 

In an earlier thread of yours I posted a response that criticized certain people who seemed to respond quite rudely when it was clear you were/are going through a hard time in your life. I believe I have a better understanding of the responses you were receiving. My friend, you need to get out of your head, and I truly mean that in the most non-offensive way possible. The path of over-analyzing your life and the world around you through excessive thinking is NOT HEALTHY. I've been there. The nature of the TAO and the underlying philosophy of this forum holds that it is not possible to achieve clarity solely through thought or excessively thinking. Ask yourself what the reality of your present situation is: Does your thinking and comprehension of your life influence how you feel i.e. your emotional state, vitality, etc? Or, does your emotional state, vitality, etc influence your thinking and comprehension of your life? Speaking from personal experience, I really believe that if you attempted to introduce as much exercise as possible into your life, coupled with an introduction to short social events, you would really start to see things differently.

 

Take care,

 

Matt

[That Guy]

I'll just leave this here http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2010/feb/03/excessive-internet-use-depression

[markern]

Well I have met many people born in a fire year doing Vipassana and being hermits or monks/nuns.

 

The year of birth is determinant when establishing the major energetics of the individual, 5 elements theory one more time.

 

 

These are not definitions, it is all about energy; you cannot escape yin and yang unless you reach paranirvana.

 

 

 

 

 

That you are a hardheaded (Taurean) earth horse, LOL. Btw, I am the fire type, so a wandering monk here.

 

 

Well what I actually am is a fire person. That is crystal clear to me and I have been diagnosed as such by indian and chineese doctors. So much for astrology. Neither is there anything earthy about me at all. The spleen is my weakest organ and I even have a grounding problem

[Non]

yea one thnigs for sure: all women, ALL WOMEN, all women. carry a bitch shield. they all want to act cold, and like a bitch. they all want to look at me with a face of despise, and they dont even know me. they all want to act disgusted with me. they all want to act intolerant and impatient with me.

 

How do they expect men to NOT be scared to approach them if they're always this way? yea good way to ward off people you don't even KNOW how they are, because you make men have to fight this shit off. good way to ward off anyone who you think is not good looking. and trust me, it is ALL about looks for you bitches.

[Non]

I talk to a girl I don't even know yet, and just to talk to them. and they're already acting cold, and rude. I say hello they're giving me a dirty "FUCK YOU" look.

 

ok.

 

every woman.

 

every, god damn fucking woman.

 

I seriously want to commit suicide.

 

how in the hell am I supposed to approach a woman, if I get shot down before I even get to approach her? before she even gets to know me? Every. God. Damn. Woman.

 

Every. Fucking. Damn. Every DAMn WOMAN REJECTS ME BEFORE I EVEN APPROACH HER.

 

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

 

 

EVERY FUCKING WOMAN.

 

 

EVERY WOMAN.

 

EVERY FUCKING WOMAN.

 

 

EVERY FUCKING WOMAN REJECTS ME BEFORE I GET TO KNOW HER BEFORE SHE GETS TO KNOW ME BEFORE I APPROACH HER BEFORE I WAS FUCKING BORN BEFORE THE UNIVERSE EXISTED.

 

EVEVERY FUCKING WOMAN.

 

EVERY

EVERY ECVUESJLfk;tawep 4

\q3t5

[Non]

I talk to a girl I don't even know yet, and just to talk to them. and they're already acting cold, and rude. I say hello they're giving me a dirty "FUCK YOU" look.

 

ok.

 

every woman.

 

every, god damn fucking woman.

 

I seriously want to commit suicide.

 

how in the hell am I supposed to approach a woman, if I get shot down before I even get to approach her? before she even gets to know me? Every. God. Damn. Woman.

 

Every. Fucking. Damn. Every DAMn WOMAN REJECTS ME BEFORE I EVEN APPROACH HER.

 

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

 

 

EVERY FUCKING WOMAN.

 

 

EVERY WOMAN.

 

EVERY FUCKING WOMAN.

 

 

EVERY FUCKING WOMAN REJECTS ME BEFORE I GET TO KNOW HER BEFORE SHE GETS TO KNOW ME BEFORE I APPROACH HER BEFORE I WAS FUCKING BORN BEFORE THE UNIVERSE EXISTED.

 

EVEVERY FUCKING WOMAN.

\q3t5

EVERY

EVERY ECVUESJLfk;tawep

 

this is enough reason to want to commit suicide. because I know, before I even get to try, I have already failed.

[Non]

I think I will commit suicide.

 

There's no logical reason for a woman to reject me before I even try.

 

This is all not in my head. Every woman DOES reject me before I even try. They are all rude, and cold with me. They all ignore me.

 

I tried talking to this one girl, and she was definitely, definitely, just bein cold with me. She was acting intolerant.

 

And I was just talking to her NORMALLY!!!!!! I wasn't hitting on her. Nothing. No girl even wants to be my FRIEND when I try to act friendly.

 

This is not inn my fucking hEAD!

 

 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I refuse to believe that women like nice guys, and dont want the bad boys.

 

Because the badboys are the only ones who have no remorse enough to conquer this 'bitch shield', by making her SUBMIT. And yes SUBMIT because I've seen it before! Time and time again, they want the DOMINANT MEN. THE FUCKING JERKS.

 

ONLY ONLY ONLY ONLY ONLYO ONYLNYLONYONLYNyoknerwthqyp 2893opr

erqwepiohu

[Non]

Fuck you all.

 

I'm going to die.

 

There's nothing I can do if anything I try is no good.

 

I can't even talk to a girl NORMALLY without her acting this way.

 

Either I'm being targetted by some evil force making ALL, yes ALL yes ALL yes ALL ALLALL ALL ALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALLALL ALL

 

females ALL FEMALES in the entire universe YES EVEN ANIMALS, THE DIVINE FEMININE ALL FUCKING MALE AND FEMALE AND FUCKING GOD AND THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE THE HEAVENS EVEN HELL EVEN EARTH

 

reject me. even deaht. evenlife. everything and nothing.

 

 

EVERYTHJINJG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Lucky7Strikes]

I talk to a girl I don't even know yet, and just to talk to them. and they're already acting cold, and rude. I say hello they're giving me a dirty "FUCK YOU" look.

 

ok.

 

every woman.

 

every, god damn fucking woman.

 

I seriously want to commit suicide.

 

how in the hell am I supposed to approach a woman, if I get shot down before I even get to approach her? before she even gets to know me? Every. God. Damn. Woman.

 

Every. Fucking. Damn. Every DAMn WOMAN REJECTS ME BEFORE I EVEN APPROACH HER.

 

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

EVERY

 

 

EVERY FUCKING WOMAN.

 

 

EVERY WOMAN.

 

EVERY FUCKING WOMAN.

 

 

EVERY FUCKING WOMAN REJECTS ME BEFORE I GET TO KNOW HER BEFORE SHE GETS TO KNOW ME BEFORE I APPROACH HER BEFORE I WAS FUCKING BORN BEFORE THE UNIVERSE EXISTED.

 

EVEVERY FUCKING WOMAN.

 

EVERY

EVERY ECVUESJLfk;tawep 4

\q3t5

 

You have an obsession with woman. All you do is want to fuck them, lose your virginity or whatever, and take from them. And so when you see a woman the fact that they are a WOMAN is the thing you are most concerned about, obsessed over. You are approaching them with a parasite mindset, one of need and "taking" and not giving. Who would want to start any sort of relationship with a person with such an attitude? Then truly they'd be self-destructive, and so prove your point. But since they DON'T, your entire thing about women wanting "pain" is flawed. Learn to be satisfied by yourself. Treat woman as you fellow "human beings" who are on the path just as you are. I doubt you read any of these replies anyway, there's been enough advice here. Stop spamming.

[Non]

You have an obsession with woman. All you do is want to fuck them, lose your virginity or whatever, and take from them. And so when you see a woman the fact that they are a WOMAN is the thing you are most concerned about, obsessed over. You are approaching them with a parasite mindset, one of need and "taking" and not giving. Who would want to start any sort of relationship with a person with such an attitude? Then truly they'd be self-destructive, and so prove your point. But since they DON'T, your entire thing about women wanting "pain" is flawed. Learn to be satisfied by yourself. Treat woman as you fellow "human beings" who are on the path just as you are. I doubt you read any of these replies anyway, there's been enough advice here. Stop spamming.

 

 

Look man. I've never had a female friend, I've never had a girlfriend, and I'm still a virgin.

 

And you expect me to be like some monk living in a temple? I am in no sort of environment and have no way of even controlling my subconscious, my PHYSIOLOGICAL self, which is severely imbalanced simply because I've never had SIMPLE female interaction because they've all rejected me.

 

How do you expect me to be perfect? I consciously do try as much as I can, and do my best, but my BIOLOGY is something that is hardto contorl, ESPECIALLY if my environment, and I simply dont know how to subside my desire.

 

Fuck man I dont even care as much about sex, I wish I could even get FRIENDSHIP, and even THAT I can't get, for the reasons stated above.

[Non]

Look man. I've never had a female friend, I've never had a girlfriend, and I'm still a virgin.

 

And you expect me to be like some monk living in a temple? I am in no sort of environment and have no way of even controlling my subconscious, my PHYSIOLOGICAL self, which is severely imbalanced simply because I've never had SIMPLE female interaction because they've all rejected me.

 

How do you expect me to be perfect? I consciously do try as much as I can, and do my best, but my BIOLOGY is something that is hardto contorl, ESPECIALLY if my environment, and I simply dont know how to subside my desire.

 

Fuck man I dont even care as much about sex, I wish I could even get FRIENDSHIP, and even THAT I can't get, for the reasons stated above.

 

I guess I forgot to mention that I usually NEVER approach women for anything other than a mere friendship. If Ididn't it would end up even worse. In fact I dont even know how to approach women simply for sex. so how can you say that all I want is sex? yea I do want it but I dont ever approach a girl just for that.

[Lucky7Strikes]

ass.

Edited February 25, 2010 by Lucky7Strikes

[Lucky7Strikes]

assness.

Edited February 25, 2010 by Lucky7Strikes

[Creation]

I think I will commit suicide.

 

There's no logical reason for a woman to reject me before I even try.

 

This is all not in my head. Every woman DOES reject me before I even try. They are all rude, and cold with me. They all ignore me.

 

I tried talking to this one girl, and she was definitely, definitely, just bein cold with me. She was acting intolerant.

 

And I was just talking to her NORMALLY!!!!!! I wasn't hitting on her. Nothing. No girl even wants to be my FRIEND when I try to act friendly.

 

This is not inn my fucking hEAD!

Hi Non.

 

There is a logical reason for this, even if you are unable to perceive it. How do you think girls would react to you if they were given transcripts of all you posts on Tao Bums before they met you? I imagine that they think, "Wow I don't want to be around this guy." The irony is that in a sense, this is exactly what is happening, because all your fears, frustrations, lusts, neediness, and other issues are being projected out for the people around you to feel. And they feel it, even if they are not conscious of it, especially the girls. So there is your explanation for you....

 

So, are you going to get mad at them for not accepting you the way you are? If you do, please remember that you do not accept them they way they are. You talk a lot about how horrible and impure most of them are. So why should they not reciprocate your rejection?

 

The fact is that it is useless to expect change to start with them, so it MUST start with you. You have to find a way to not project such negative vibes. That means dealing with your issues. I can't tell you how to do that because I am still struggling with it myself. I wish I could help you with a solution instead of just telling you the problem, but at this point I can't.

 

What I can do is assure you that the world is not out to get you, instead you are reaping what you sow. That is certainly not worth killing yourself over. If the universe deemed you unworthy of living, you would be dead. Since you are still alive that must not be the case. The fact that you are at all interested in spirituality is all the more reason not to throw away your body.

 

Best wishes and good luck,

Tyler

Edited February 25, 2010 by Creation

[Aetherous]

Non,

 

GO TO A PSYCHIATRIST AND TALK TO THEM ABOUT THIS! No excuses! No killing yourself, either!

 

That is the way to solve your problems.

[ShaktiMama]

Look man. I've never had a female friend, I've never had a girlfriend, and I'm still a virgin.

 

And you expect me to be like some monk living in a temple? I am in no sort of environment and have no way of even controlling my subconscious, my PHYSIOLOGICAL self, which is severely imbalanced simply because I've never had SIMPLE female interaction because they've all rejected me.

 

How do you expect me to be perfect? I consciously do try as much as I can, and do my best, but my BIOLOGY is something that is hardto contorl, ESPECIALLY if my environment, and I simply dont know how to subside my desire.

 

Fuck man I dont even care as much about sex, I wish I could even get FRIENDSHIP, and even THAT I can't get, for the reasons stated above.

 

 

Taobums is not therapy. Many have tried to tell you that over the past several months that I have been a member.

 

You don't even listen to what people have tried to share with you. Pretty good well rounded advice I have heard so far and all you do is pick it apart and reject it out of hand.

 

Time to drop the "poor me" act. Speaking as a female your vibe is awful and frightening. I almost didn't respond because you just keep spewing more and more ugliness that feels just like a slap in my face to me. For making statements like this women have called the police because they are scared of this. No wonder no woman wants to talk to you.

 

Love and honor yourself first instead of all this self hate. Until you do you will remain stuck in your victimhood and self pity. That is the worst chick repellant on this planet.

 

Your sense of entitlement will be the death of you not because you project your hate on half the population of the world.

 

You really need professional help. Stop making excuses about how bad all therapists and therapies are because that is typical of people who don't want to change their behavior. There are plenty of good therapists out there. Best to find one before the court system has to mandate one for you. You will only attract females in your life who meet your level of self esteem and self acceptance. The fact that you loathe women is a walking advertisement that you are full of self loathing.You may think you don't loathe women but your whole conversations say otherwise.

 

If women misunderstand you it is not the woman's job to make sure communication is clear. Don't blame us for your ineptitude to make yourself heard or understood.

 

Stop whining and do something about your situation. And I say that with the kindest intent.

[freeform]

Yup - definitely therapist time.

 

First thing to discuss: your mother.

[Non]

Actually, no. You care about sex. That's the first thing that you need to admit. That your relationship with woman are centered around this obsession. You can't have friendship when you have this hidden motive clearing luring around, which they sense.

 

Controlling your physiological self, altering the biological structure, is part of meditation and cultivation of a new mindset. Didn't you ask about MCO, zhan zhuang, and all these things? Why don't you do them and give your obsession a rest. Transform your stagnant sexual energy or open up your channels. You have tools here and plenty of people who are willing to give timely advice here.

 

Female interaction isn't the only way to balance yourself. In fact, learning to balance yourself without any sort of outside interaction, a conditional aspect, is a key point in practice. To be self fulfilled so that the love is generated FROM you: it becomes unconditional. And this sincere willing to give attracts people because they want, you have something to offer them. Right now you are the one who wants to suck people off, who clings to them, who declares, "I want to make you suffer." And unless you meet a female with a bodhisattva mindset, most people are gonna stray away from you.

 

I do all of that, MCO, zhan zuang. they don't work. I'm on day 36 of retention too. full lotus, MCO, don't work. 6th tibetan rite, dont work. exercise, dont work.

 

And you all tell me about how women reject me based not on my actions, or what they see, but some cosmic mystical no-logic bs like "women can sense what you've done". COme on, they reject me mroe than they freaking reject serial rapist and criminals. People have done tons worse but that has never stopped them from meeting women. But only bitter nice guys are the one being rejected simply because they're being natural.

 

Wouldn't it matter more what I've actually done to them, rather than something I posted on some message board, but only post this way because I am going through some very illogical BS?

Edited February 25, 2010 by Non

[RyanO]

I agree with what most have said, and that you've pretty much received the best advice here you're gonna get. So I'm not gonna give any. I and I'm sure others don't want to give the illusion that you're receiving help when in fact you should be seeking professional counsel.

 

That said, I will say that one thing I've learned from spirituality is to treat pain lovingly. We have a natural tendency to hate pain and want things to be different, but I think a better approach is to embrace all sensations and feelings as being children of existence.

 

One of the principles of alchemy is that things can't be destroyed...but they can be transformed.

[RyanO]

And as far as your practice "not working", I'd say to not be so eager with results. Don't expect them to work like magic. If what you mean is that they're not increasing your success with women, that's not their purpose. That would be a by-product and not a definite one either.

 

If you're not enjoying your practice, do something else. Spiritual practice should be enjoyable. Make love with the universe.

 

I'm gonna go ahead and give the Inner Smile another shout out