elmer Posted February 26, 2010 (edited) my brother-in-law is feeling depressed and posted this on his facebook status tonight: brother-in-law: "has lost the point to all of this. What the fuck do we think we're doing here? Can I check out now? I think I'm done." i immediately thought a zen koan would be a helpful response, as koans can undermine the rational approaches to life that can sometimes lead to these types of ill feelings... i.e. trying to "find" the reason to life... anyone got any good koan responses/suggestions or just good zen quotes? thanks! Edited February 26, 2010 by elmer Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Birch Posted February 26, 2010 How about you call him up and say "Hey, I saw your last FB status. Are you ok? Need to talk? you know I'm there for you". Try this for a Koan: "Since when do we ask internet for how to deal with our own lives?" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elmer Posted February 26, 2010 How about you call him up and say "Hey, I saw your last FB status. Are you ok? Need to talk? you know I'm there for you". Try this for a Koan: "Since when do we ask internet for how to deal with our own lives?" kate, thanks for your advice. my wife actually had already talked to him tonight, but i'll make sure to call him tomorrow and do it myself. it's funny and ironic, but if you take a step back and view "the internet," i'd say a great number of people use it to either ask for advice or tell others how do deal with their lives... i mean, just look at this forum! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Birch Posted February 26, 2010 Yup, look at this place;-) You're right. I guess it's better than "Yahoo Questions" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aetherous Posted February 26, 2010 as koans can undermine the rational approaches to life that can sometimes lead to these types of ill feelings... i.e. trying to "find" the reason to life... That just made me think...perhaps the whole spiritual path is like a koan, in this sense. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elmer Posted February 26, 2010 That just made me think...perhaps the whole spiritual path is like a koan, in this sense. scotty.... i agree. the power in spirituality is that it fills the void where reason can no longer provide answers. if reason can't provide the answers, sometimes an "experience" will. as such, we get the phrase, "the proof is in the pudding... " if zen koans can release us from the "limitations" of rationality, they become tools to offer us that "direct experience," that lays beyond our reasoning... i'm sure you're familiar with this... but i just like writing it, because it makes me think a little clearer. btw, i ran across this neat little story. i'm not such a big fan of the explanation at the end, but i just like the story. http://www.anmolmehta.com/blog/2007/06/26/true-meaning-of-zen-of-life-in-just-3-words/ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
3bob Posted February 26, 2010 (edited) my brother-in-law is feeling depressed and posted this on his facebook status tonight: brother-in-law: "has lost the point to all of this. What the fuck do we think we're doing here? Can I check out now? I think I'm done." i immediately thought a zen koan would be a helpful response, as koans can undermine the rational approaches to life that can sometimes lead to these types of ill feelings... i.e. trying to "find" the reason to life... anyone got any good koan responses/suggestions or just good zen quotes? thanks! I'd also suggest reviewing the basic dharmas related to being a human being in the present, regardless of any feelings related to past or future outcomes along the lines of, "what the f___ do we thnk we're doing here"... and it may also help to really look at any young kids who are relatives, friends or in the community and ask yourself what kind of legacy and or example do you want to leave for them, and what do you want or hope to see on their faces and or in their hearts? (thus honestly weigh violence against ones-self and the aftermath to such human relations and then truly ask yourself what the hell was I thinking!? (besides the absolute guarantee of far worse and more prolonged and hellish suffering for yourself in checking out before it is your time!) Sorry, I'm not to good at saying that lightly. Om Edited February 26, 2010 by 3bob Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elmer Posted February 26, 2010 Yup, look at this place;-) You're right. I guess it's better than "Yahoo Questions" now that's an idea.... "Taobum Questions..." or "just Ask Taobums" Q: "How long is a meter?" A: "as long as you want it to be... Q: "What should I get my honey for Valentines?" A: Nothing. if she loves you, she'll love you anyways... well.. i'm not sure about that last example. lol Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elmer Posted February 26, 2010 I'd also suggest reviewing the basic dharmas related to being a human being in the present, regardless of any feelings related to past or future outcomes along the lines of, "what the f___ do we thnk we're doing here"... and it may also help to really look at any young kids who are relatives, friends or in the community and ask yourself what kind of legacy and or example do you want to leave for them, and what do you want or hope to see on their faces and or in their hearts? (thus honestly weigh violence against ones-self and the aftermath to such human relations and then truly ask yourself what the hell was I thinking!? (besides the absolute guarantee of far worse and more prolonged and hellish suffering for yourself in checking out before it is your time!) Sorry, I'm not to good at saying that lightly. Om cool... so is there a good quote from the basic dharmas related to being a human being in the present, void of any relation to the past or future? ... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
3bob Posted February 26, 2010 (edited) cool... so is there a good quote from the basic dharmas related to being a human being in the present, void of any relation to the past or future? ... I don't feel qualified to give advice (through a particualr quote) on such a serious subject over the internet... what I was saying above is only related to my own experience/thoughts in that area - for whatever that may be worth in sharing? Thus for your brother-in-law I'd suggest finding mental health professionals and or lead people of whatever faith system you are part of for more one-on-one personal help. As for basic dharma and or the ways of the Tao there is a great wealth of material on the internet (or in book stores) that can easily be found using a search engine by someone like youself or others who know him well and the details of the situation. Best wishes to you at this difficult time. Edited February 26, 2010 by 3bob Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
soaring crane Posted February 26, 2010 (edited) my brother-in-law is feeling depressed and posted this on his facebook status tonight: brother-in-law: "has lost the point to all of this. What the fuck do we think we're doing here? Can I check out now? I think I'm done." anyone got any good koan responses/suggestions or just good zen quotes? Not a Koan but it immediately reminded me of this from Richard Bach (from the book "Illusions"): "Here is a test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: If you're alive, it isn't." And sort of Byron Katie-ish, you could post something like this: "brother-in-law has found the point to all of this. We know what the fuck we're doing here. Can I extend my stay? I'm not done yet". It would be a good sign if he laughs at it but, yeah, depression is a little too complex for facebook... Edited February 26, 2010 by soaring crane Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elmer Posted February 26, 2010 Not a Koan but it immediately reminded me of this from Richard Bach (from the book "Illusions"): "Here is a test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: If you're alive, it isn't." And sort of Byron Katie-ish, you could post something like this: "brother-in-law has found the point to all of this. We know what the fuck we're doing here. Can I extend my stay? I'm not done yet". It would be a good sign if he laughs at it but, yeah, depression is a little too complex for facebook... yea... i remember that book. loved it! makes me want to pull it off my bookshelf for a read... i was really close to posting a link to monty python's "always look on the bright side of life," sung by a bunch of men hanging on crucifixes. i thought it was hilarious and quite fitting, but my wife wouldn't let me post it because FB family and friends would all think heathen-ly thoughts of me. if you haven't seen it, check it out on youtube. about 3 min's long and totally worth it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
soaring crane Posted February 26, 2010 yea... i remember that book. loved it! makes me want to pull it off my bookshelf for a read... lol, that book is popcorn for the soul. Cotton Candy for the mind. But, I love it, too! Blows JL Seagull out of the water, er, air. monty python's "always look on the bright side of life," if you haven't seen it, check it out on youtube. you jest... haven't seen it? Whaddaya think I am? A Big Nose with a False Beard? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elmer Posted February 26, 2010 lol, that book is popcorn for the soul. Cotton Candy for the mind. But, I love it, too! Blows JL Seagull out of the water, er, air. you jest... haven't seen it? Whaddaya think I am? A Big Nose with a False Beard? hahaha... the pythons are an enlightened group, are they not? what type of quigong walking do you practice/have done? i've done back step before, but am curious as to other "types" and if you feel any different from each respective walk? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
