Sex-Gender-Relationship-need: the taoist poll

[Pietro]

Since the question have been running around about how many people are straight and how many people are not, I decided to make the poll.

 

I tried to make it exhaustive. Even at the cost of sounding funny sometimes.

 

Also since some question can really be private I am making the poll not public. The division on the 5 elements came from a discussion with Bruce where explained us how people can be divided into those 5 groups, although everybody is a bit of a mix. It was not so much part of the water method teachings (although there might be something in that tradition too), but of his training as a priest, and as such we were not taught. It was more like a piece of trivia we were given. I added an extra situation that seem to capture what we are usually expected from this society. So you can vote that as well.

 

Please be grateful that the website only permit 3 questions and 20 options...

 

 

 

Out of a request from Apech I changed the last options from

not enough intellectual sharing

into

none of the above.

 

If your biggest problem is that you have too much intellectual sharing, well click on it too, essentially you are ok ;-)

Edited November 14, 2010 by Pietro

[Apech]

Hi,

 

Before I answer this (very detailed) poll - could you put a none of the above in the last question please.

[Apech]

Added my boring vote ... no orgiastic cross-dressing bisexual rites for me.

 

Last question ... don't strongly feel the lack of anything ... this may be delusion but there it is ...

[Marblehead]

I voted.

[Pietro]

Added my boring vote ... no orgiastic cross-dressing bisexual rites for me.

 

Last question ... don't strongly feel the lack of anything ... this may be delusion but there it is ...

 

You know we are made in layers, like an onion. Now you don't feel lack, then you cross into a deeper layer, and maybe feel the lack, and then you find a way to balance that, and you are back into not feeling the lack. Also I suppose it makes a huge difference when a person is voting, after meditation, or before. After a party or before a meeting, and so on. Luckily you can delete your vote, and hopefully revote. So if suddenly you realise all your life you were missing sex orgasmic affection with an alien you still can revote. :-)

[Eric23]

I'm in

[Taomeow]

"If you could have it your way, what kind of relationships would you have?"

 

And why the wuxing designations? Wood = faithful? How about Wood with Fire (that's me)? How about Wood practitioner of Water methods (that's me too?) How about Wood avoiding Control by Metal (that's me again?)

I definitely need the "all of the above" option to answer this question. It's different at different stages of one's life. E.g., when I was a teenager, I was naturally celibate. When I was happily married, I was naturally faithful. When I was unhappily married... and so on.

[Pietro]

"If you could have it your way, what kind of relationships would you have?"

 

And why the wuxing designations? Wood = faithful? How about Wood with Fire (that's me)? How about Wood practitioner of Water methods (that's me too?) How about Wood avoiding Control by Metal (that's me again?)

I definitely need the "all of the above" option to answer this question. It's different at different stages of one's life. E.g., when I was a teenager, I was naturally celibate. When I was happily married, I was naturally faithful. When I was unhappily married... and so on.

 

The "if you could have it your way" is a way to say that the question should be taken away from the here and now, from the secular to the sacred. So the question is somehow about your nature.

 

The wuxing designation come from something Bruce told us in Crete. Feel free to disregard them.

Still this question is about your nature (as much as you can feel it).

That does not change that much in a lifetime, although you might discover new layers as time goes by.

The situation in life can change, but the internal nature of a person does not change that much.

 

 

Aso it is not related here with what kind of tradition you are following. We are speaking about relationships.

 

But you are right that it should be possible to have multiple situations, but then you would have to define how much of each. And it either needed sliding bars or many many more situations. I mean hundreds of more.

 

I could have added the couples, but those are 10, and then you still need to define which is stronger. And then why not the triplets, other 10, again you need then to say which is the dominant factor.

 

So just go for the dominant element in your relationship life

[Taomeow]

The "if you could have it your way" is a way to say that the question should be taken away from the here and now, from the secular to the sacred. So the question is somehow about your nature.

 

The wuxing designation come from something Bruce told us in Crete. Feel free to disregard them.

Still this question is about your nature (as much as you can feel it).

That does not change that much in a lifetime, although you might discover new layers as time goes by.

The situation in life can change, but the internal nature of a person does not change that much.

 

 

Aso it is not related here with what kind of tradition you are following. We are speaking about relationships.

 

But you are right that it should be possible to have multiple situations, but then you would have to define how much of each. And it either needed sliding bars or many many more situations. I mean hundreds of more.

 

I could have added the couples, but those are 10, and then you still need to define which is stronger. And then why not the triplets, other 10, again you need then to say which is the dominant factor.

 

So just go for the dominant element in your relationship life

 

OK. I understand.

 

A quick note though -- what tradition one follows may be immaterial of course but it may be very pertinent too, in that it can change you (cultivation!) if you work with the wuxing consciously. E.g., I choose customized practices that decrease Fire (I have too much, not good for Wood) instead of going with what seems to come "naturally" (Fire does! -- if a phase is over-represented, it will generate drives that seem "natural" but are really "natural for an unnatural situation" of imbalance only. Remove the imbalance, and the drives will transform... So "cultivation" seems "unnatural" and just going with "whatever seems natural" seems natural... and it's the other way around, turns out. )

 

Normal and natural for humans 100,000 years ago was to have no concept of paternity, therefore no concept of sexual "faithfulness," therefore no concept of "personal property," therefore no greed, jealousy, exploitation, enslavement. This could only work when all men and all women took care of all children. We've come a long way, baby... Most manifestations of human sexuality today are abnormal. Most aren't even sexual -- sex is a pain mediator so it is used as such by people who are suffering rather than being sexual. Furthermore, sex is the only current excuse for close physical intimacy -- so people are using it who merely need close human contact, which is normal for humans but has been made socially unavailable. (I've seen a somewhat different picture in China though -- same-gender pairs walking hugging each other, holding hands, but they are not gay, they are just expressing affection physically without this necessarily entailing "sexually." They simply don't know yet that this behavior will soon, as Western ways penetrate deeper, be removed from their arsenal of "what it's like to be human," and it will change everything forever... but not yet.)

[Birch]

Great TaoMeow! Another chapter for the book/website

 

I voted some things untruthfully, because I'd rather see myself in a "nicer" light (read "acceptable" whatever the hell that is). Can I change my vote/vote again?

[TheSongsofDistantEarth]

What about 'No kids, never wanted any'?

[Pietro]

Ditto.

 

Also, what about 'Female (and Male) Straight but open to new possibilities'?

 

No kids ever wanted is not there because if you don't want something we don't care. There are infinite things that you don't have and you don't want. What is important is what you do not have and are a cause of pain, or that you do have and are a pain as well.

 

I think you can delete your vote, and then vote again.

 

There is an option for "bisexual mostly straight" which I think is what approaches more to the straight but open. Also, I don't think I can change anymore once people have started voting.

 

Thanks for participating :-)

[goonis38]

Hey there,

I voted and it said I already voted. I haven't don't know...But cool... I tried... Mel

[Listener]

I voted. More of my secrets are revealed.

[Taomeow]

I voted too. Now if only Pietro agreed to combine his poll with my ET one and add "extraterrestrial" to his extramarital assortment of questions...

[Apech]

We're not very gay are we.

[Pietro]

OK. Finally decided to vote.

 

Also, Pietro - although your question "not enough Intellectual Sharing" is good, I wondered about a right-brained "not enough deeply creative endeavors (e.g. artistic creating)" would have been a nice counterpart.

 

sure, hack the system so we can have hundreds of possibilities, and many more questions too, and I will add them ;-)

[Guest tao4joe]

I voted too. Now if only Pietro agreed to combine his poll with my ET one and add "extraterrestrial" to his extramarital assortment of questions...

 

Thats funny

[Guest tao4joe]

OK. Finally decided to vote.

 

Also, Pietro - although your question "not enough Intellectual Sharing" is good, I wondered about a right-brained "not enough deeply creative endeavors (e.g. artistic creating)" would have been a nice counterpart.

 

Good one.

[zanshin]

This is interesting. Bumping and maybe could be moved to Garden.