Happiness in solitude

[Everything]

Hey guys, haven't found a topic about this, thought I'd make one to increase my/others knowledge on this area of life.

 

Is it possible for one person to be completely durably happy in complete solitude, without purpose besides filling the belly everyday. Who has done it?

[Maddie]

I think this is a good question because it strips away everything else and gets to the basics of who we really are. As buddah said the problem is attachment and that would include people as well I suppose. I have been asking myself this question now that I have separated from my wife. I know a lot of people go straight to their rebound relationships, but to me that says that they as an individual are not complete, and lacking something within themselves, and thus need another person to fill the void in them. So rather than seek a rebound relationship(s) I have been looking inward and when I do feel this urge I try to find out what is lacking within. If the primary urge is one for the desire for physical pleasure, or companionship, or love, or what ever, I try to find the part of me that is lacking on the inside and fill this with my own energy. So far it seems to be working quite well, even though it is not instinct. If we could get to the point that we would not need or have to be around anyone would this not indicate that we have completed ourselves and have no lack within?

[Marblehead]

I sometimes go three or four days without talking with another human (except on the internet).

 

Sure, after my last divorce there were many times when I felt absolutely lonely and went out just so I could be around other people.

 

I have adjusted to my solitary lifestyle and enjoy it very much. I have a couple of good friends that I see fairly often and that adds something to my life.

 

Happiness is a matter of our inner essence and has almost nothing to do with externals.

[wayki]

hi there,

 

i did 2 x 50 day controlled complete solitudes....each time i blissed out completely (i studied much merkaba mysticism prehand with a guide) ...i only blissed out / raised energy after i got thro the washing machine of who i was / traits / beliefs etc. i was fasting too which was a bit intense.

 

 

but now i live up a mountain 8km from anyone with a girlfriend, and i only venture out once a week. for me, society and many people are sooo toxic these days that my vibration takes a hit (even from adverts and lots of concrete) so i am happy in more or less solitude. i dont seek groups, or even friends, and the real deep friends i have live in other countries, and i have the internet which is a big "connection."

 

i could never go back to a town or city after living so close to nature and space. and i would like one day to do a longer 1 year or so solitude. someone said to me recently i was cut off, "what from?" i said, they couldn't reply.

 

we are all we need,we have all we need, i really believe this.....but alas, i feel the world has issues and needs some love and help.

 

 

 

www.waykiwayki.com

[Everything]

hi there,

 

i did 2 x 50 day controlled complete solitudes....each time i blissed out completely (i studied much merkaba mysticism prehand with a guide) ...i only blissed out / raised energy after i got thro the washing machine of who i was / traits / beliefs etc. i was fasting too which was a bit intense.

 

 

but now i live up a mountain 8km from anyone with a girlfriend, and i only venture out once a week. for me, society and many people are sooo toxic these days that my vibration takes a hit (even from adverts and lots of concrete) so i am happy in more or less solitude. i dont seek groups, or even friends, and the real deep friends i have live in other countries, and i have the internet which is a big "connection."

 

i could never go back to a town or city after living so close to nature and space. and i would like one day to do a longer 1 year or so solitude. someone said to me recently i was cut off, "what from?" i said, they couldn't reply.

 

we are all we need,we have all we need, i really believe this.....but alas, i feel the world has issues and needs some love and help.

 

 

 

www.waykiwayki.com

 

Ok, I'm not sure so I'm going to ask. From your post, it seems you have enjoyed the solitude with no humans around you at all, which I did not think was possible.

Just like in that movie "Cast Away", where Tom Hanks washes up on an island and talks to a ball all day. He lives on that island, not knowing why, having an urge to survive, often more suicidal thought then not. He gets moments of hope where you can see the 0.0001% happiness arising only to fade away when the hope is lost again. So I am sceptical!

 

Are you more often happy then not, while being in solitude? Or rather "neutral" and dull and just going trough the routines without much emotion. It seems more like a survival urge that keeps you going when real solitude is around, which is kind of your inner core anyway.

 

I always dream that I am in a prison cell, I get alot of excersize but I'm cut of from nature. Every human being needs to fight for one day in the deep well, just to get a glimps of daylight for 1 minute. I thought I would get happy if I saw it again, but I did not. Then I sat there in my prison cell, close my eyes and decide to do nothing at all untill I die.

 

I don't understand how one can be happy in such a situation. It does not seem that happiness comes from within! It is just that good inner mechanics are more likely to cause outer environments to match your happiness. So, basicly, maybe happiness does come from outside?

 

A happy man in a city has alot more going for him then a not so often happy man in the city. But a happy man in the wilds has less going for him then the not so happy city guy. It seems that the environment is irrelevant to ones happiness, yes. But when there is so much excess around you that you become confused, it can be exactly the environment that prevents you from becoming happy and living an unnatural life.

It is because we don't take the relativity of our environment into account that we live an unnatural life. A city guy should be rich, have alot of girlfriends, many friends, good business to be happy. A man living in the wild should have a group of people he can trust on, people to hear stories from, magicians to create shows, wise men to lead the people, etc. Finding security and prosperity, there are luxeries for people in the wild as well. It still seems that desires are the one thing that has driven humanity and shall always be the core engine of their journey.

Edited November 29, 2010 by Everything

[themaninthesuit]

this is an interesting thread and its something i have been thinking about a good amount recently. Wayki your experience in solitude sounds quite amazing, i hope to be able to do it at some point myself. I think its very possible to be happy in solitude. I go through phases of loving solitude to wanting to be around many people. I think this want for people is because we think we need people to be happy. For most of us, we are surrounded by people from an early age so it seems like its a necessity. Your question of happiness is interesting as well, it reminds me of in my philosophy class the question was brought up: would you rather be a satisfied pig, or an unsatisfied human? Me i would rather be a satisfied pig living as its nature demands, than a human who thinks he is content pursuing what he can not have.

[Aetherous]

I think people need to be around people in order to be happy. But then again, being around people can be really annoying. Solitude is peaceful, but nothing is better than spending time with your best friends.

[Everything]

I think people need to be around people in order to be happy. But then again, being around people can be really annoying. Solitude is peaceful, but nothing is better than spending time with your best friends.

Thats really confusing.

[Everything]

this is an interesting thread and its something i have been thinking about a good amount recently. Wayki your experience in solitude sounds quite amazing, i hope to be able to do it at some point myself. I think its very possible to be happy in solitude. I go through phases of loving solitude to wanting to be around many people. I think this want for people is because we think we need people to be happy. For most of us, we are surrounded by people from an early age so it seems like its a necessity. Your question of happiness is interesting as well, it reminds me of in my philosophy class the question was brought up: would you rather be a satisfied pig, or an unsatisfied human? Me i would rather be a satisfied pig living as its nature demands, than a human who thinks he is content pursuing what he can not have.

 

Indeed, at some age a boy needs to let go of the people most dear to him in order to go into the unknown wilderness out there to become a man. I think that is more the kind of solitude that is ment then being completely alone. It may seems like being a pig at first, very fragile and not comfortable. It is a scary position to be in, requires courage, but the rewards are great. There are many things that people CAN easily have in life, but end up never pursuing in the first place.

In your journey, even when you are surrounded by many people, you will feel alone. I'm trying to understand why, what is the purpose of this loneliness. What is the core of it, how do we use it to our advantage.

Edited November 29, 2010 by Everything

[Cloudhand]

Indeed, at some age a boy needs to let go of the people most dear to him in order to go into the unknown wilderness out there to become a man. I think that is more the kind of solitude that is ment then being completely alone. It may seems like being a pig at first, very fragile and not comfortable. It is a scary position to be in, requires courage, but the rewards are great. There are many things that people CAN easily have in life, but end up never pursuing in the firt place.

 

 

that says it best.

[Everything]

that says it best.

He doesn't sound too happy about being a solitary man.

 

They jump from girl to girl, expecting that the girl is suppose to make them happy, be his 50%, fill the void in their lifes. No one can live to such expectations. A relation is doomed to fail that way. Why can't people just get infatuations out of their heads and be the man they want to be in the first place, before going on dating frenzy. Having a great life while single, have the girl add to that already good life. That seems more rational to me. That way you wont girl and if you do it does not matter anyway, you're ready for a new one on the fly, heck might even get two like some people do. But I feel ya, mon! Loves a pitch.

Edited November 29, 2010 by Everything

[strawdog65]

Hello everyone!

 

Everything....what an interesting post!

 

Like others here I also gave this much contemplation... especially when

I was a younger man.

 

For myself I've only been able to spend 5-6 days completely alone at a stretch.

It was not an issue, and there was no feeling of boredom.

 

I found that when I got back around people I had a new found appreciation for

all the uniqueness of the individual. And I felt calmer because of the absence.

 

I believe the only way to experience total aloneness without it affecting you

emotionally, would be if you could achieve complete detachment from society,

your loved ones, and anyone who means anything to you. This would be

impossible for me, family, loved ones, beautiful wife... that kind of thing.

 

Peace!

[Cloudhand]

He doesn't sound too happy about being a solitary man.

 

They jump from girl to girl, expecting that the girl is suppose to make them happy, be his 50%, fill the void in their lifes. No one can live to such expectations. A relation is doomed to fail that way. Why can't people just get infatuations out of their heads and be the man they want to be in the first place, before going on dating frenzy. Having a great life while single, have the girl add to that already good life. That seems more rational to me. That way you wont girl and if you do it does not matter anyway, you're ready for a new one on the fly, heck might even get two like some people do. But I feel ya, mon! Loves a pitch.

 

 

You didnt get it mon.

[Gerard]

...Is it possible for one person to be completely durably happy in complete solitude, without purpose besides filling the belly everyday. Who has done it?

 

it is but you need to be fully involved in spiritual practice far away from society. No mind, no worldy distractions of any kind.

[Non]

I think the people that are happy in solitude have simply adapted to a toxic society such that it's necessary to run away from society.

 

But I dont think that's very natural as opposed to living a good life where you aren't alone and people aren't toxic. Ie in a community with like minded people.

 

When it comes to be celibate that might be the hardest.

 

Sure you can forget about everyone else, but can you really say that about the opposite sex? All you need is sex right? lol that's how a lot of people think. Forget friends, forget people, just find a good sex partner every once in a while.

 

Anways that's how many animals do it.

 

IN practice though I wouldn't know how to do this because I'm not a 'player' and I dont know how to just seek sex for just sex.

[Non]

Hey guys, haven't found a topic about this, thought I'd make one to increase my/others knowledge on this area of life.

 

Is it possible for one person to be completely durably happy in complete solitude, without purpose besides filling the belly everyday. Who has done it?

 

IMO, no.

 

The very question you're asking answers it at the same time.

 

A person who is COMPLETELY alone, cannot even find purpose. For to have purpose means to have "Others" in your life. All that is in your "life" IS "life!" The rock, the tree. Your self. These are Others, apart from the "observer". Which may not even exist. In the end isn't it all you though, which means you are others as well?

 

IN essence one cannot be completely happy if one is a lone.

 

To be happy is to be happening. Happyning. To exist, within the Community of others.

 

I'm sorry but most people here that are thinking of solitude and being happy, are thinking of a person who lives with not as much people in their life but they still have the company of the objects in the reality. That could be animals, that could be the people you associate with but aren't really even "making friends". Who needs friends anyways, just get sex. lol j.k. but no seriously a lot of poeple think that way. I just wish I would be able to do that in a moral and just way, and in a way that I would like.

 

There just is no way. TO have purpose means to have, an-other on the wait. An-other reality that awaits, ie when you acheive the purpose, or have the purpose. It is an-other itself.

 

THink about it.

 

 

You people are crazy just be gdamn human. Freaks. AvPD.

 

Seriously tho. I'm jkk about that last bit. welll maybe only a little.

 

What is it, people think it's "cool" to be a hermit because it makes one look super bad-ass, and cold. Yea, coldness and yin. That makes one hot, and yang. Mass media got to you much?

 

Most hermits are only so to get away from the society that overwhelms them. And yes everyone needs their time to themselves, their personal space. But sooner or later you may want some company. If its not for the urges of boredom but because it may seem lifeless. You may just become unconscious. How else will you learn? How will you learn of yourself? Will your body just break down from lack of usage? Imagine generations of being alone, asexual producers. You just become this tiny point of light, with really no purpose until it finally diminishes. You become one with God.

 

That's "death".

Edited November 30, 2010 by Non

[Everything]

IMO, no.

 

The very question...

 

...one with God.

 

That's "death".

 

Dude, wtf. Thats exactly my perspective of things.

 

What the hell...

 

Anyways, just curious if some mutated guys out there exists who can have durably happiness from within. No matter how much he gets hurt in life, having his freedom taken from him, tortured and enslaved. Enjoying every beat of the stick... GUESS NOT! Who would have known, hmm?

Edited November 30, 2010 by Everything

[Everything]

What does solitude do then? Makes you balanced, allows for meditation, becoming observer of your life and being present minded.

 

My conclusion: Solitude would most like result in neutrality rather then happiness. Once you get the life flowing again you will see the happiness to come naturally. Unless you loose touch, again, with what you have found during solitude.

 

Solitude is the beginning of a new chapter and the birth of your new self.

Edited November 30, 2010 by Everything

[Non]

Dude, wtf. Thats exactly my perspective of things.

 

What the hell...

 

Anyways, just curious if some mutated guys out there exists who can have durably happiness from within. No matter how much he gets hurt in life, having his freedom taken from him, tortured and enslaved. Enjoying every beat of the stick... GUESS NOT! Who would have known, hmm?

yea that's just suffering. getting beat hurts.

 

People forget that to become a person with such siddhis as "enjoying pain and suffering" and being able to withstand it without pain which something of the body.. one needs spiritual advancement for such a siddhi. For such spiritual advancement within the physical body to occur one needs to either have a very advanced spirit or for their body to become conditioned to such a state. That conditioning requires the body to be able to manifest it.

[wayki]

just solitude is probably a little dull, but if you are working with dreams and esoteric doctrine it can be amazing. I was following an alchemical path at the time, and needed the solitude to "fly" as it were. It was like a break in my life, a condenser, a way of not having to have some extra carnations to learn lessons, you can spin up consciousness and then condense alot into a short period - this combines partical physics with merkaba mysticism (consciousness has no mass so we can spin it up so to speak).

 

these guys seem very happy being hermits in the chinese mountains, with only a few sutras with them.....

 

great vid

 

 

love to all, and glad i found this site

 

www.waykiwayki.com

[thelerner]

just solitude is probably a little dull, but if you are working with dreams and esoteric doctrine it can be amazing. I was following an alchemical path at the time, and needed the solitude to "fly" as it were. It was like a break in my life, a condenser, a way of not having to have some extra carnations to learn lessons, you can spin up consciousness and then condense alot into a short period - this combines partical physics with merkaba mysticism (consciousness has no mass so we can spin it up so to speak).

 

these guys seem very happy being hermits in the chinese mountains, with only a few sutras with them.....

 

great vid

 

 

love to all, and glad i found this site

 

www.waykiwayki.com

 

You have a nice site yourself. Glad we have your experienced input.

 

 

Michael

[Kali Yuga]

The problem with civilization is not that it is the problem in itself; but rather it demarcates exactly the problems that lie within ourselves. Solitude does not solve the main root of the problem, its more like push the snooze button on the alarm. you have to be with people some times.

 

there are really screwed up people out there but hey, what else is new? most suffering is internally created due to neediness and not knowing your own identity. If you don't understand and have a clear definition of your own values and personality. The truly happy person does not need external circumstances to be happy because happiness emanates from his full being; it is who he is. The screwed up thing is that advertising, the media, the radio, and a bucketload of other influences convince us that we do need external things to be happy. Get yourself a better house, a new car. You have a hole there inside that the commercial capitalist world exploits by convincing you that things like a new car or a new dress is what you need to feel happy. Self esteem is bought with cash. Our culture nowadays is fucked up you have four year olds tearing themselves up emotionally because they have acquired the belief that they have to look like what they see on tv. no screwing with you; its on Oprah.

 

The point is that true self esteem is something that comes from within because of a strong core identity. If you have that then you are gold wherever you go. If you do so choose to be in solitude then the true mark of this whole thing is that you should not suffer if you move back into civilization. if you need that solitude then maybe there is work that needs to be done inside. Personally i find that living in civilation is a test and path in itself because you interact with so many people everyday; by watching how you interact with others detachedly you can learn a great deal; there are many proclaimed "spiritual masters" who are screwed up inside but don't know it because they haven't developed good social characterstics because of lack of being in the real world.

Edited December 1, 2010 by Kali Yuga

[Non]

just solitude is probably a little dull, but if you are working with dreams and esoteric doctrine it can be amazing. I was following an alchemical path at the time, and needed the solitude to "fly" as it were. It was like a break in my life, a condenser, a way of not having to have some extra carnations to learn lessons, you can spin up consciousness and then condense alot into a short period - this combines partical physics with merkaba mysticism (consciousness has no mass so we can spin it up so to speak).

 

these guys seem very happy being hermits in the chinese mountains, with only a few sutras with them.....

 

great vid

 

 

love to all, and glad i found this site

 

www.waykiwayki.com

 

Yea I mean you can be happy if you're kept busy, and value the stuff you do more than other worldly things, or at least the society.

[RyanO]

I think the people that are happy in solitude have simply adapted to a toxic society such that it's necessary to run away from society.

 

But I dont think that's very natural as opposed to living a good life where you aren't alone and people aren't toxic. Ie in a community with like minded people.

 

When it comes to be celibate that might be the hardest.

 

Sure you can forget about everyone else, but can you really say that about the opposite sex? All you need is sex right? lol that's how a lot of people think. Forget friends, forget people, just find a good sex partner every once in a while.

 

Anways that's how many animals do it.

 

IN practice though I wouldn't know how to do this because I'm not a 'player' and I dont know how to just seek sex for just sex.

 

Haha I like this post. And a lot of the other posts as well for that matter.

 

I think the animal thing is interesting.

 

One thing that separates us from animals is our incessant mental chatter. It is what creates illusions like low self-esteem.

 

An animal doesn't feel need until he feels it in his body, then seeks to fulfill that need. If in someway he fails, he doesn't sit back and compare himself to other animals or feel he's worthless. He just goes on until the need arises again.

 

Of course in the animal situation there are preferred outcomes, but humans tend to make situations much worse by analyzing and judging instead of allowing ourselves to have a quiet mind and flow with nature.

 

Thus many 'spiritual' practices not only lend themselves to whatever metaphysical goals they have, but are practical in the sense that they offer a way to harmonize the 'down-time' of solitude, loss, and not-doing. So when they doing comes, one is in a much better position to act.

[RyanO]

Ok, I'm not sure so I'm going to ask. From your post, it seems you have enjoyed the solitude with no humans around you at all, which I did not think was possible.

Just like in that movie "Cast Away", where Tom Hanks washes up on an island and talks to a ball all day. He lives on that island, not knowing why, having an urge to survive, often more suicidal thought then not. He gets moments of hope where you can see the 0.0001% happiness arising only to fade away when the hope is lost again. So I am sceptical!

 

 

 

I've thought about this scenario.

 

The difference between his situation and one who is happy in solitude are:

 

1) He did not choose to live in solitude. For example, people who are single/celibate by choice are much happier than those who are single and desperate. Sort of a 'duh' one.

 

2) He did not have any kind of spiritual practice/goal. If he had knowledge of meditation/qigong/spiritual techniques etc., his 'stay' would have been much happier.

 

So these are two reasons why using this movie to support that solitude will lead to unhappiness doesn't follow.