Stimulating Healthy Spiritual Transformation

[RiverSnake]

I have always agreed with Taoist philosophy on the idea of moderation in all things be it alcohol, sex, food...etc

 

-However, it never occurred to me that you could meditate too intensively or to long or practice yoga and Tai Chi for too much until i read this excerpt from "A Farther Shore".

 

-It also occurred to me that what is moderate in our spiritual practices is somewhat of a moving bar according to the practitioner. A year ago when i was learning Reiki a women their told me that she was beginning to get serious about her meditation and practice 2 hours a day. At that time that seemed like an extreme, however, a year later 2 hours seems moderate to me.

 

-I would like to hear what the opinion of the various practitioners on forum are on what "moderation" is in ones spiritual practices.

 

 

"People frequently want to know how they can best stimulate the process of spiritual transformation. It should be clear by now that i believe moderation and balance are the essential ingredients in any attempt to further spiritual progress. With this in mind, i am providing a list of stimulants to kundalini.

 

Be aware of them, use appropriate ones only in a balanced living, and consider the tragic consequences and throwing yourself into spiritual emergency --or worse. I do not say this lightly.

 

In my work over the last fifteen years, i have seen people who, in their over eagerness to have spiritual experiences, did themselves great harm. One was a man i met at a conference a few years ago. I'll call him Jerrit.

 

 

"I was a university professor in a town in the Midwestern United States. When i was in my thirties i had a profound mystical experience and decided i would do anything to have the experience again.

 

Both the univeristy i taught in an the community i lived in were very traditional in their approach. At the time when i had my mystical experience, topics such as Eastern religion and meditation were considered strange.

 

Even the practice of yoga was looked at askance. After my experience, however, i did find someone who recommended Gopi Krishna's books. I managed to obtain them and poured over them, absorbing as much as i could.

 

I noticed that Gopi Krishna repeatedly urged moderation and balance and warned against the dangers of excessive spiritual practices. However, in my intense desire to stimulate another spiritual experience, i decide not only to not follow this advice but to even go so far as to finding everything that might stimulate Kundalini and then begin to practice it.

 

I threw myself into intensive yoga, meditation, and Tantric practices. And i did eventually stimulate the awakening of kundalini. My body and mind were totally unprepared for the tremendous shock to my system. I was thrown into spiritual emergency, and then psychosis. Unable to function, i lost my job.

 

I felt as if i were on fire or burning alive, and i endured sensations of light so bright that they were excruciatingly painful. I suffered through horrific visions and the blackest pits of despair and depression.

 

Unfortunately, i was forced to endure this suffering for almost three years, because i couldn't find anyone who understood what i was going through. Finally, i found a sympathetic therapist in a nearby city through the Spiritual Emergence Network.

 

I began to practice grounding techniques and to follow the moderate approach to life and spirituality i had first read about in Gopi Krishna's books. But then even i continued to suffer periodically for some time. Finally after year's of effort, i come close to full recovery."

 

Jerrit''s story serves as a powerful warning, as do the case histories of others who have brought on spiritual emergency by intensive, excessive spiritual practices. At the conference where we met, he spoke openly about his experiences and his suffering and literally begged people no to do as he had done."

 

A Farther Shore by Yvonne Kason and Teri Degler

[surfingbudda]

I am still confused as to what exactly Kundalini is? Is awakening kundalini like unleashing your spiritual potential onto yourself in a very short amount of time rather than following the safer way of practicing moderate qigong and meditation to gradually become spiritually aware? I would WAY rather go about spirituality using the moderate method so how can one stay clear of awakening a kundalini? Is it possible to avoid it or if it is meant to happen then it just will? Are there things to avoid doing if Kundalini is wished to be avoided. From my understanding Kundalini is not at all necessary for true spiritual development, however I am sure many would argue me on that point.

[RiverSnake]

I am still confused as to what exactly Kundalini is? Is awakening kundalini like unleashing your spiritual potential onto yourself in a very short amount of time rather than following the safer way of practicing moderate qigong and meditation to gradually become spiritually aware? I would WAY rather go about spirituality using the moderate method so how can one stay clear of awakening a kundalini? Is it possible to avoid it or if it is meant to happen then it just will? Are there things to avoid doing if Kundalini is wished to be avoided. From my understanding Kundalini is not at all necessary for true spiritual development, however I am sure many would argue me on that point.

 

There are others on the forum who could explain this better than me. However my basic understanding is that Kundalini is a energy that resides at the base of the spine and is latent in most individuals.

 

-However, spiritual practice stimulates kundalini which is a form of sexual energy that rises up the spine through the seven chakras and triggers mystical experience or expansion of consciousness initially in most people for a short period of time.

 

-However, buddahood or perfect enlightenment is when you live with constant kundalini exploding out of your head in a stable way.

[phore]

The kundalini is the Sanskrit term for alchemical awakening. The taoists call it the enlightenment of the fire and water and there are 3 levels to it. Its connecting the genitals to the brain through the spinal cord.

 

A deliberate awakening is preced by a few things.

the microcosmic orbit begins running

First the 5 elemental energies that make up the body fuze together and the newly formed spirit baby may poke its head out to say hello to the world.

Second the psychic channels will open and you will begin to be able to see hear and feel the spirit world.

1st enlightenment- Then you meet the snake. A divine being He will introduce himself and begin guide you through alchemically forging the philosophers stone.

2nd enlightenment- the bubbling springs begin erupt filling the body with rainbow light showers in a mind blowing experience. It cleans out your channels and and sacrifices your ego to the gods. you merge with the snake. the mind learns to rest in silence and presence while the divine energy does your thinking for you.

3rd enlightenment is about fine tuning the advanced alchemical mechinisms and learning to use your new energy. meditation takes on unprecedented depth. qigong becomes as natural as movement which becomes quite a bit more natural too.

 

after the enlightenments you are ready to begin the more advanced stages involving becoming an immortal wanderer denizen of the celestial realms.

 

In my personal opinion, if a spiritual teacher hasn't figured out how to use these mechanisms then he isn't a spiritual teacher.

 

If a person is going to make a claim to enlightenment, then they need to have at least enough awareness to be able to use their body correctly (sexual alchemy is our forgotten birthright), and enough spiritual purity to pass through the sacred fire without burning up (diamond body anyone?)

[Seth Ananda]

For me, the best way to bring on a spiritual experience was to pick a method and just keep doing it till something happened...

lol. I took this Very seriously in my early days. For instance, I would stay in my room except for occasional short toilet/food missions, and just chant. I had great Love for God, so my chanting was all of a devotional context. Also I would add some number of energy movement practices, like 4 middle pillar meditations a day, or constant pranic breathing, and 1 hour of fire breath 3 times a day. I sometimes kept this up for months at a time.

What can I say? Something always happened... Not always what I expected, but something...

 

I do not feel like I need such excesses any more, as I live in a state of at least partial constant communion with the Universe.

But I am supremely happy with everything I did. People often warn of the dangers of such unguided practice, but for me they made me who I am today. And yes, it was dangerous.

I had several periods of total mental breakdown, Including nearly becoming a bloodthirsty cannibal of criminally insane proportions, but some how I always got out of the trouble.

 

And every bit of the trouble was totally worth it for the learning it gave me. I think having faith in divinity really helped me out of a lot of binds as deep prayer is psychically medicinal, and I had such an Inner certainty that everything would turn out right, due to guidance. If I had not had these qualities things may have been very different.

I regularly meet or hear of people who just get stuck in an experience and can find no way out.

This may sound harsh, but to me it seems that many of these people do not want to face the hideous content and agonising pain that Spiritual/Kundalini experiences may bring up. I guess I am lucky in that I want to face and embrace every little detail of my Internal world.

 

So all in all I encourage total reckless abandon to ones Spiritual path, but warn that there is No going back.

You may turn something on you can not turn off.

 

Seth.

[mewtwo]

how are these things done phore?

[devoid]

[...]

-It also occurred to me that what is moderate in our spiritual practices is somewhat of a moving bar according to the practitioner. A year ago when i was learning Reiki a women their told me that she was beginning to get serious about her meditation and practice 2 hours a day. At that time that seemed like an extreme, however, a year later 2 hours seems moderate to me.

 

-I would like to hear what the opinion of the various practitioners on forum are on what "moderation" is in ones spiritual practices.

[...]

 

Hi Tao Apprentice,

 

I guess it depends on ones own personal goals and situation. If a Monk from an order which cherishes meditation meditates for only 2 hours a day that would probably be considered insufficient by his peers. If a working parent with young children would meditate 2 hours a day that could be argued to be considered excessive.

 

Who is to tell you what is excessive or insufficient other than yourself or perhaps your immediate peers?

 

To help answer these questions for oneself it may help writing down ones objectives, goals and aspirations and then prioritize them, while realizing that the day only has 24 hours.

 

I guess that at the end of the day its all a matter of perspective and balance

[phore]

The basic stuff that you start off with is relaxing, learning to breath, opening the chakras, and running the orbits through the functional and governor channels. This part of the training is usually passed on through oral tradition from teacher to student. The teacher must be able to transfer the techniques energetically to the students. The state of nonordinary reality must be introduced to the student in some way.

 

Stillness meditation alone (without the alchemy) could trigger this process given a lifetime of practice. I personally find that it is best to play around with stillness techniques, but leave the true sitting and forgetting for when you can go so far nowhere that you don't feel compelled to remember that somewhere when your done.

 

Sexual alchemy will do the trick. Taoist yoga has a pretty balanced approach to the whole thing.

 

 

http://www.biologyofkundalini.com/

heres a great rescource for info relating to spiritual awakening.

 

http://kundaliniawakeningprocess.com/

This website has a distance learning program that will teach you basically everything you need to know about yoga and qigong. Its how i learned the techniques i have been using for years now.

 

For some "oral tradition" check out Timothy Leary, Terrence Mckenna, and Carlos Castaneda.

[sinno]

*2 thumbs up for KAP*

[Birch]

You realise that by saying something is really dangerous that lots of people are going to want to try it, right ?

 

Anyway, I'll second the "in moderation" thing, even if I didn't start out that way either

 

I'd say that KAP is a great way to go because I went that way, and especially since the teachers are so readily available to discuss issues (that will come up).

 

And as Seth said "hideous content and agonising pain that Spiritual/Kundalini experiences may bring up."

- Check

 

I'd suggest if you know or suspect you have any of this in your background, go to some kind of therapy to deal with it before taking up ANY spiritual practice. And get your diet and exercise semi-in order. And, hone up those critical thinking and anti-cult skills.

 

I'd rather see people "wake up" safely.

[ShaktiMama]

First the 5 elemental energies that make up the body fuze together and the newly formed spirit baby may poke its head out to say hello to the world.

 

Or as some of my female friends said, just like I did when it happened to me, "OMFG! I am effing pregnant!" I once watched a woman grow a pregnant belly and lose it in a half hour when Dr. Morris and I were leading a pranayama type excercise. Freaked us out! (But hey, we played cool. )

 

Yeah, it was a girl baby in my belly. Still there in different form too.

 

 

Your MMV but be prepared.

s

 

I don't hear of this phenomenon at all out there (except in private sessions with women)but I would imagine considering where the idea of Immaculate Conception got started. Just a thought.

Edited January 11, 2011 by ShaktiMama

[phore]

Or as some of my female friends said, just like I did when it happened to me, "OMFG! I am effing pregnant!" I once watched a woman grow a pregnant belly and lose it in a half hour when Dr. Morris and I were leading a pranayama type excercise. Freaked us out! (But hey, we played cool. )

 

Yeah, it was a girl baby in my belly. Still there in different form too.

 

 

Your MMV but be prepared.

s

 

I don't hear of this phenomenon at all out there (except in private sessions with women)but I would imagine considering where the idea of Immaculate Conception got started. Just a thought.

 

Ive only had the privilege of observing first hand two people come through this stage. Myself and another male, so im not an expert on the feminine kundalini symbolism.

 

I did have one lover who talked about foxes and snakes being important animals to her. I think that foxes may be connected to ovarian energy. she was still in the process of learning at the time.

[ShaktiMama]

I would go as far to say qigong becomes your natural movement, belly breath becomes natural, all activity is moving meditation...life become more seamless and flowing.

 

I remember, early in the process, how I dove into something very dark and heavy, when I arrived on the other side my spirit body was charred and burnt. Only my two eyes were recognizable.

 

Not for the faint hearted.

 

s

 

 

1st enlightenment- Then you meet the snake. A divine being He will introduce himself and begin guide you through alchemically forging the philosophers stone.

2nd enlightenment- the bubbling springs begin erupt filling the body with rainbow light showers in a mind blowing experience. It cleans out your channels and and sacrifices your ego to the gods. you merge with the snake. the mind learns to rest in silence and presence while the divine energy does your thinking for you.

3rd enlightenment is about fine tuning the advanced alchemical mechinisms and learning to use your new energy. meditation takes on unprecedented depth. qigong becomes as natural as movement which becomes quite a bit more natural too.

 

after the enlightenments you are ready to begin the more advanced stages involving becoming an immortal wanderer denizen of the celestial realms.

 

In my personal opinion, if a spiritual teacher hasn't figured out how to use these mechanisms then he isn't a spiritual teacher.

 

If a person is going to make a claim to enlightenment, then they need to have at least enough awareness to be able to use their body correctly (sexual alchemy is our forgotten birthright), and enough spiritual purity to pass through the sacred fire without burning up (diamond body anyone?)

[manitou]

Also, it's interesting that kundalini also arises spontaneously on occasion. My husband and I were in an auto accident, it triggered active kundalini in both of us. But we had both been walking the path of spirit for many years. Maybe spirit knows when it's time, even if someone hasn't actively been seeking it. It was sure nothing I asked for, didn't even know about it until a woman I didn't know walked up to me in a coffee house and told me there was a book I had to read, it was about kundalini energy. Somehow she was able to detect that I was 'suffering from it', (which I was at the time and had no clue about the electrical sensations within my spine, neck, head, back along with the odd flashing visions of things trying to get through a blockage and other bothersome returning mental pictures). This went on for a couple years and in fact I can still find that on any given day I may be gently 'obsessed' with a mental vision of a blockage being blasted out, or even a scab being ripped off. This goes way beyond finding the right words to describe some of the stuff I can 'see' in my mind's eye, but always these mental images will relate to a cleansing out process of the vessels within my spirit-body and chakra system.

 

I scared myself nearly to death reading the Gopi Krishna book - that man certainly had an extreme case. j Mine is with me constantly to this day, it's been 6 or 7 years. It has resulted in 3rd eye activation, I am capable of Seeing to a soul depth and breadth that I was unable to previously. It also has set off a chain of other periodic events which could only be described as unusual. I dabble in healing as well.

 

My personal feeling now is that kundalini rising isn't the beginning or end of anything. It's one more thing within the process, as far as I can see. But I'm guessing that about 20 years of reading different translations of the TTC (plus meditation) just did the trick on its own. If one is capable of making the kundalini rise through certain types of meditations, this is wonderful. But the education certainly continues once the K is activated. But it does seem that kundalini activity sets into action other things as well.

 

The other earth energy that is much stronger than the K-energy that circulates, is the electromagnetic energy that comes out of the ground and up into the legs, up the body. I have only experienced this twice, once during a healing, and once when I was handing a pair of metal-toed boots to another woman. We both felt the phenomena coming out of the ground and it absolutely feels like you have your wet toes in a light socket.

 

I'd be interested to know if anyone knows of the connection between the really strong electrical current that can be brought up from the ground, and that which courses through the K-active body?

[ShaktiMama]

Also, it's interesting that kundalini also arises spontaneously on occasion. My husband and I were in an auto accident, it triggered active kundalini in both of us. But we had both been walking the path of spirit for many years. Maybe spirit knows when it's time, even if someone hasn't actively been seeking it. It was sure nothing I asked for, didn't even know about it until a woman I didn't know walked up to me in a coffee house and told me there was a book I had to read, it was about kundalini energy. Somehow she was able to detect that I was 'suffering from it', (which I was at the time and had no clue about the electrical sensations within my spine, neck, head, back along with the odd flashing visions of things trying to get through a blockage and other bothersome returning mental pictures). This went on for a couple years and in fact I can still find that on any given day I may be gently 'obsessed' with a mental vision of a blockage being blasted out, or even a scab being ripped off. This goes way beyond finding the right words to describe some of the stuff I can 'see' in my mind's eye, but always these mental images will relate to a cleansing out process of the vessels within my spirit-body and chakra system.

 

I scared myself nearly to death reading the Gopi Krishna book - that man certainly had an extreme case. j Mine is with me constantly to this day, it's been 6 or 7 years. It has resulted in 3rd eye activation, I am capable of Seeing to a soul depth and breadth that I was unable to previously. It also has set off a chain of other periodic events which could only be described as unusual. I dabble in healing as well.

 

My personal feeling now is that kundalini rising isn't the beginning or end of anything. It's one more thing within the process, as far as I can see. But I'm guessing that about 20 years of reading different translations of the TTC (plus meditation) just did the trick on its own. If one is capable of making the kundalini rise through certain types of meditations, this is wonderful. But the education certainly continues once the K is activated. But it does seem that kundalini activity sets into action other things as well.

 

The other earth energy that is much stronger than the K-energy that circulates, is the electromagnetic energy that comes out of the ground and up into the legs, up the body. I have only experienced this twice, once during a healing, and once when I was handing a pair of metal-toed boots to another woman. We both felt the phenomena coming out of the ground and it absolutely feels like you have your wet toes in a light socket.

 

I'd be interested to know if anyone knows of the connection between the really strong electrical current that can be brought up from the ground, and that which courses through the K-active body?

 

My kundalini has been awake since 1991 and by 1998-97 it had become fully complete in its circuit from from my feet, all the way up my back, through the top of the head, and all the way back down the to the feet. It circulates and fills up my body all the time. I can feel it radiating from deep within my bones.

 

Although it became complete I was really just an infant and the rest of my life has been in learning how to live with Kundalini Shakti and to be of service to the world.

 

The earth energy is very important...extremely so IMO...to a kundalite. Our bodies are a nexus point between heaven and earth. Maturely developed kundalites will run energy between heaven and earth and back again subconsciously and continually. They will also radiate that energy out from their center out like an expanding sphere.

 

Our bodies are crucibles of alchemy. It is forever transforming itself from immaterial to material and back again. Like water which rises from the earth as dew and steam to condense in the heavens and fall back to earth again as water to continually recycle itself. Adding earth and sky energy ups the intensity and the power that we have as alchemists.

 

We (Kundalites)call that energy that arises out of the ground the Earth's Kundalini. We teach our students to access this in their practice for keeping strong and grounded. Some will differ or disagree in the wording with me. The earth has its own meridians (lay lines)and central core that is connected to us just like the heavens do. It is possible to cultivate that connection until it becomes a part of your own energy system.

 

You can work with the chakra below your feet that is always rooted in the earth to strengthen this connection consciously. You can learn to modulate the intensity that flows out of the earth so you don't get shocked or knocked over. That is part of the "rewiring" of the energy system that occurs so you can carry higher and higher voltage when kundalini starts to work in our bodies.

 

The current in your body wants to be connected to the current in the earth and the current in the heavens. For some, when k is activated, their left big toe gets a burn mark where the energy enters the body and begins its ascent toward the heavens transforming the body as it moves. Some have burn marks, like I did on my body, where the energy surfaced along the skin. This is why it is so important to stay hydrated during this process and grounded.

 

Personally, I have had my spine straighten out and adjusted when the connection of energies is made between heaven and earth. It will pull me taught like a string. I find that my students will naturally start to stand straighter and with better posture.

 

Hope this helps some. I am just speaking from my own experiences and the experiences of my students.

 

Susan

[manitou]

Thank you Susan - your perspective was really informative and your words resonated right to the bottom of my heart. The idea of concentrating on the underground chakra makes perfect sense.

[suninmyeyes]

 

Personally, I have had my spine straighten out and adjusted when the connection of energies is made between heaven and earth. It will pull me taught like a string. I find that my students will naturally start to stand straighter and with better posture.

 

 

 

Susan

That is happening to me right now.Everything is straightening out,my organs are being changed/"refreshed I feel.Even my feet are changing,and I actually hear the bones moving.It has been some strange sensations to move fast.

It is intersting to read about other peoples expiriences.

[phore]

I usually try to eat nearly all organic food. I drink lots of tea and yerba mate. I use almond milk and am currently considering switching to goats cheese because I'm a capricorn. The foods i eat are cooked lightly so they still have life energy left in them.

I practice yoga, and qigong, daily. As susan said it all becomes natural movement. Its more fun to move your hands in circles when you can see and feel the energy that your playing with. In the back of my mind m always doing qigong breathing.

Its better to use a small amount of effort doing it right than an immense amount doing it wrong.

I like to go outside and watch animals, celestial bodies, trees, and other natural processes. Connect to the gaian mind. This is when i work on my earth chakras (see susans post).

 

I like to go to the chiropractor and get massages.

I use hemp seed based massage oil on my body to give my skin lots of good energy. I use a neti pot to keep my sinuses clear.

 

I listen to music and draw lot. Children seem to like me since my awakening so i play with them sometimes.

I practice dream yoga. I pray at my alter.

I try to become involved in meaningful relationships. Im currently experimenting with a freelove lifestyle.

Intuition takes me everywhere.

 

All of these things have helped me get my kundalini running smoothly. They could certainly help most people who wish to have a smoother awakening.

Edited January 11, 2011 by phore

[ShaktiMama]

Thank you Susan - your perspective was really informative and your words resonated right to the bottom of my heart. The idea of concentrating on the underground chakra makes perfect sense.

 

 

You are welcome.

[ShaktiMama]

Ive only had the privilege of observing first hand two people come through this stage. Myself and another male, so im not an expert on the feminine kundalini symbolism.

 

I did have one lover who talked about foxes and snakes being important animals to her. I think that foxes may be connected to ovarian energy. she was still in the process of learning at the time.

 

Snakes, snake imagery, dragons, all played a huge part in the process of my kundalini awakening. Visions of snakes proceeded each new energy burst of kundalini to take me to another level.

 

The whole process can be enjoyed. I used to say my life became more fascinating after the kundalini awoke because I felt like I was playing in an incredibly beautiful and strange fantasy, sci fi movie...except it wasn't acting.

 

Regardless of the warnings and the karmic theory involved explained in the unfolding it still is one of the most precious moments in my life.

 

Because of the k awakening I no longer fear death. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I am more than this body, this mind, this existence, this consciousness. Not in an intellectual understanding but one that developed because of an empirical involvement in my own transformation.

 

s

[phore]

Snakes, snake imagery, dragons, all played a huge part in the process of my kundalini awakening. Visions of snakes proceeded each new energy burst of kundalini to take me to another level.

 

The whole process can be enjoyed. I used to say my life became more fascinating after the kundalini awoke because I felt like I was playing in an incredibly beautiful and strange fantasy, sci fi movie...except it wasn't acting.

 

Regardless of the warnings and the karmic theory involved explained in the unfolding it still is one of the most precious moments in my life.

 

Because of the k awakening I no longer fear death. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I am more than this body, this mind, this existence, this consciousness. Not in an intellectual understanding but one that developed because of an empirical involvement in my own transformation.

 

s

The feeling is like every day from now on is going to be fantastic. I cannot express how shocked i was to find that for the first time after my awakening something negative happened.

I have since mellowed out and realized that the negative things are just the universe giving you the chance to grow.

 

My mind is completely opened to the idea that tomorrow i could lose a loved one, my own life, or win the lottery.

everything is filled with new opportunities to have fun.

 

It takes a lot to knock me off my spiritual center (especially with my psychic shields) but even when something does it only takes a little meditation to get back into alignment.

 

The awakening isnt the end result. Its only the beginning.

Edited January 12, 2011 by phore

[manitou]

Because of the k awakening I no longer fear death. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I am more than this body, this mind, this existence, this consciousness. Not in an intellectual understanding but one that developed because of an empirical involvement in my own transformation.

 

s

 

This is an odd phenomena, and I too have felt the shift from death-fearing to non death-fearing. It's like I am prepared for it at any moment, and it's okay. but this is not to say I don't love life - I love life now more than ever before, because my energy system has awakened and is more connected with the life around it. Castaneda would often talk about utilizing death as an advisor, about an arm's length off to our left side. This mindset is wonderful in my opinion - it helps put every decision within a context that is very clear. But because we realize death is so imminent, the appreciation for life is expanded.

 

In one of Shirley McLaine's old books (Out on a Limb, maybe) she talks about an OBE where she would be connected with a silver thread to the earth but go way out in space. After she became capable of doing that, she no longer feared death, she realized that there was a continuity that extended beyond what we see here and now. I've not had the identical experience as Shirley, but one time during tantric sex my husband and I went to a golden womb of a place that eminated golden rays of light and we could hear an electrical buzzing or humming. I don't know if this is the same place that death takes you to, but it felt like it was the connection of all-spirit, of the essense of everything. It was a place of no gravity, a golden void. This phenomenon felt very real to us - and we both have a different view of death since this happened. The fear is gone.