good guys finish last

[RiverSnake]

This stuff isn't rocket science. Be a masculine man and you will attract feminine women.

 

-I recall somewhere reading about a concept called "Yin and Yang". Over analyzing things will just confuse you.

[Enishi]

 

Women look for brutality. Since most women run on fear based mindsets, most women almost exclusively look for brutality and dominance in a man. Plain and simply.

 

 

SOME women look for brutality (although sadly many stereotypical mainstream American females are like this I will admit).

 

Many others do not. My last several partners LOVED the fact I came across as kind-hearted and (according to them) I made them orgasm more than normal.

Edited January 25, 2011 by Enishi

[NeiChuan]

To live in this world you have to pretty much accept that you're Going to Have to step on other people to simply be who you are and to survive.

 

That means there are no truly good men out there. Perhaps more good than bad, but there's none that hasn't been a solely good person. In this world it is impossible.

 

That's why daoists tell the Confucius people "how can we be good and well mannered and civilized when you're starving? Where's the balance in that?"

 

Why? Because to be good requires literal self sacrifice. Nobody in this society wants to be truly good without self sacrificing, and yes that does mean even dying. Even if for many generations millions of people die trying to be good and then we end up not going anywhere as a society or as a species and we just die off.

 

I don't know which girl or realization broke your heart. But do yourself a favor and drop it, for your own growth. If you keep sitting home wondering about could happen and being cynical/speculative about the truth. You'll never ever move foward.

 

That means there are no truly good men out there. Perhaps more good than bad, but there's none that hasn't been a solely good person. In this world it is impossible.

 

 

Maybe, but I dare to dream

[Everything]

... and mating less=die younger?

 

bullshit.

 

John

I wonder where he heard that!

 

Infact, I would actually say that mating more you would have passed on your genes and are no longer needed, bye bye.

 

But from an evolutionary standpoint, even if you mate alot, living longer will allow even more offspring. So no, both live equally long.

 

Hump along! Or whatever...

[Mal]

MOST HUMAN BEINGS ARE IRRATIONAL.

 

Yes they are Non your belifs are trapping you. People have repeatedly tried to tell you this for years now This stuff IS fixable, Gjeken did it. Please get some professional help!

 

I ended up wasting nearly 3 years of my life with self pity and these limiting beliefs thinking i was not good enough. Of course the girls wouldn't look at me because i had already rejected myself in my mind.

 

Point is it doesn't matter if you're a "good guy" or "bad guy".

What matters is how you see yourself and then people will start treating you that way.

Think that you are a winner and you will win. Think that you are a loser and you will lose.

It really is as simple as that.

 

Non it is really heartbreaking to see you continually suffer and struggle with this stuff. You keep asking for help here. That is good but insanity is often defined as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. You obviously want to fix this, yet posting here doesn't seem to be helping you progress.

 

Please get some professional help.

[TheJourney]

I love being nice. I also love being dominant. So I'm nice, but when the opportunity to be dominant without forcing it comes up, I will always take it. People like this. Let them be dominant sometimes, but you be dominant too. It's equality, yet we still get to stroke our ego.

[Walker]

Non, my life experiences lead me to agree wholeheartedly to agree with those who have told you: you NEED to speak with a professional.

 

I suggest you be brave and seek one who is both wise and verbally sharp, so that you cannot talk circles around this person. A therapist or mentor you can trounce in debate cannot give you the help you need. You will quite likely need to shop around.

 

In this process, be prepared to hear some things you may not wish to hear. If it is possible, it may be very wise to involve your parents in this process.

 

Secondly, my life experiences also lead me to be able to wholeheartedly tell you: you have much to learn.

 

What you argue is, in the most generous terms I can afford you, a black and white description of a very limited slice of the human experience.

 

As you seem resistant to letting go of your conclusions, I will not waste words typing my story, other than to say that I am certain you are wrong, and that my certainty comes from my own experience. Here and elsewhere many others have shared quite a bit from their own experiences to tell you the same thing I am telling you.

 

Now, you can argue and reason until you are blue in the face and everybody has long given up disagreeing with you, but nothing beats experience.

 

And we on the other side can rebut all we want, but nothing external will sway a stubborn mind.

 

So out of a perhaps naive assumption that part of your motivation for these posts is a wish to alleviate your suffering, let me ask you something: are you willing to change?

 

Good luck.

Edited January 26, 2011 by Walker

[Sloppy Zhang]

Non, your threads like this have really been going on for a long time, and you've gotten a LOT of good advice, both from theory, and from personal experience. So I too am going to make a call for you getting some professional help. Find someone who is qualified to sit down and talk with you about these issues and where they came from.

 

You know? Guys are expected to be violent, and ruthless,and deceptive. THe moment theey are not, something is wrong right? WOmen are expected to be passive, submissive, receptive, etc. the moment they are not, something is wrong right?

 

This is irrational behavior but then again MOST HUMAN BEINGS ARE IRRATIONAL.

 

Another reason why, good guys finish last.

 

Women look for brutality. Since most women run on fear based mindsets, most women almost exclusively look for brutality and dominance in a man. Plain and simply.

 

Compare that to a guy, he doesn't have a laundry list of things he wants from a woman. She can be imperfect. But for a guy he has to be perfect, at least seem perfect (or deceive).

 

I think you are taking a set of neutral aspects, and homing in on their negative aspects.

 

It's not brutality per se, but it's the strength of will and self confidence to stand up on your own two legs and get what you want. It's the ability, be it physically or socially, to provide for yourself and whoever else you want to provide for. It could be something very small time like being able to grab a spot on the beach for a group of friends to hang out on, or providing food for a family. Both are on the spectrum of "providing", and if you really want to look at it as a test of male "survivability", shows the ability for the guy to provide for others.

 

If it comes down to a brutal guy who will take action vs. a nice guy who will sit on his hands, there are a number of women who would choose the "brutal" guy. It might not be the BEST choice, but it's the choice that exhibits some reliability.

 

But there is no way to generalize, because there are plenty of women who would rather take the nice guy!

 

Just like there are plenty of men who don't want a completely passive, "feminine" woman. It's very nice to be in a relationship with someone who is self reliant, and can provide for herself physically, emotionally, and socially (as in, she doesn't need you to completely pay for all of her stuff, to give her all her attention, and lead her by the hand everywhere).

 

Everyone is unique and everyone has their own preferences in the person they are looking for. Some of this is social conditioning, some of it is current socio-economic status, some of it personal experience, and some of it just preference.

 

"What the thinker thinks, the prover proves."

 

"In Robert Anton Wilson’s book Prometheus Rising, he models the mind as having two main parts; a thinker and a prover.

The thinker is extremely flexible, and can think any number of things.

The thinker can think the earth is flat; the thinker can think the earth is spherical.

It can think all men are poison; it can think all men are essentially good.

The prover is much more predictable: what the thinker thinks, the prover proves.

Whatever the thinker is thinking, the prover will sort for evidence to support it.

If a person thinks that all homeless people are lazy, the prover will sort through their

experience to find evidence to support that idea.

If they think all homeless people are victims, the prover will find evidence to support that idea.

If a person considers themselves to be stupid, the prover will find evidence to show that it’s ‘true’.

If a person thinks they are brilliant, the prover will show that to be true."

 

 

From my personal experiences i didn't have one girl even looking at me for nearly 3 years after my girlfriend of 4 years dumped me when i was 27.

I had lots of hang-ups about my looks, i thought i was too short, my hair was getting thinner and i honestly thought i would never have sex with a girl again.

I ended up wasting nearly 3 years of my life with self pity and these limiting beliefs thinking i was not good enough. Of course the girls wouldn't look at me because i had already rejected myself in my mind.

Point is it doesn't matter if you're a "good guy" or "bad guy".

What matters is how you see yourself and then people will start treating you that way.

Think that you are a winner and you will win. Think that you are a loser and you will lose.

It really is as simple as that.

The hard part is to really believe it and it just doesn't happen overnight.

But it will be quicker if you start to take steps that will help you support the new beliefs you are trying to install. I shaved my head and started taking better care of myself by going to the gym and eating healthier for example.

 

It took a long time to fix my beliefs but now i live in abundance of women and i don't have time for all the women that wants to be with me.

I'm just being my authentic self now and that's all that women wants from me.

 

One more thing..now that i have lots of women i have come to realize it doesn't mean shit to have lots of women wanting to fuck me. It's pretty nice sure but it doesn't bring happiness.

 

I think this post is definitely worth a couple of reads.

Edited January 26, 2011 by Sloppy Zhang

[NeiChuan]

[Ninpo-me-this-ninjutsu-me-that]

 

Everyone is responsible for their own evolution and enlightenment. The idea of pleasing a girl is like the idea of doing her math homework...sure it helps her out in the short run, but ultimately it deprives her of the lesson and thus deprives her of personal growth and independence. Thats one of the reasons I believe most women are so childish and immature is because they've learned that men will kiss their ass so they use their "charms" to get men to do what they want and don't have to mature, learn and grow.

 

B.) by conforming to what SHE wants you're depriving her of life lessons and personal growth. By trying to bring her happiness you're trying to cripple her emotionally.

 

 

Very very good point. And a great post too by the way.

 

@Marblehead: 'Women care about timing'. That's because if you arrive back home late they know you've been up to no good

[Astral_Anima]

I'm sorry maybe i'm missing something but I believe Non has brought up a slew of good points that my observations support (and perhaps i've simply had some bad observation and experiences, but they remain what I have observed). From my personal experience and observations most women don't actively seek loving behaviour but rather seek other things that the media programs them to associate with love. So many women speak of love but what they really speak of are childish fantasies that they've had since being little girls. For example alot of women tend to rely (whether emotionally or physically or financially or whatever) on men and like to feel as though they're being "saved" or "helped" which is actually just draining the other party and spoiling themself.

 

Another tendency is the abandonment of love during sex. It may start off loving but once the trance is induced their unconscious comes streaming out as they crave to relive certain aspects of their past which are FAR from loving. For example I've experienced girls who like "choking", being degraded, degrading, hitting, extremely "rough" sex etc. and I will say personally I don't feel comfortable doing these things because I believe it's re-enforcing certain..."things" deep in their psyche. For example dirty talk, what is the point of it? I can understand the idea of expressing how beautiful your mate looks, how good you feel, but the 'dirty' part of the dirty talk is like mantra. Especially in a trance state they are hyper suggestible, so when you say certain things it goes straight into their head and if they're weak (most seem to be) then it'll take root and they'll begin to believe all of this and it will ruin them from the inside spiritually. It's really no laughing matter, this world is alot darker than most realize, lol, but hey, someone gotta laugh and smile to keep the positive energy alive right? plus not EVERYONE is like that, just the vast majority, but I have faith in humanity, I think we're SLOWLY waking up.

 

The above are my only my personal opinions and observations

-Astral

 

Edit: If you want to be happy there's one simply but veddy veddy pow-oh-foe rule...

Edited January 26, 2011 by Astral_Anima

[Ninpo-me-this-ninjutsu-me-that]

I'm sorry maybe i'm missing something but I believe Non has brought up a slew of good points that my observations support. From my personal experience and observations most women don't actively seek loving behaviour but rather seek other things that the media programs them to associate with love. So many women speak of love but what they really speak of are childish fantasies that they've had since being little girls. For example alot of women tend to rely (whether emotionally or physically or financially or whatever) on men and like to feel as though they're being "saved" or "helped" which is actually just draining the other party and spoiling themself.

 

Another tendency is the abandonment of love during sex. It may start off loving but once the trance is induced their unconscious comes streaming out as they crave to relive certain aspects of their past which are FAR from loving. For example I've experienced girls who like "choking", being degraded, degrading, hitting, extremely "rough" sex etc. and I will say personally I don't feel comfortable doing these things because I believe it's re-enforcing certain..."things" deep in their psyche. For example dirty talk, what is the point of it? I can understand the idea of expressing how beautiful your mate looks, how good you feel, but the 'dirty' part of the dirty talk is like mantra. Especially in a trance state they are hyper suggestible, so when you say certain things it goes straight into their head and if they're weak (most seem to be) then it'll take root and they'll begin to believe all of this and it will ruin them from the inside spiritually. It's really no laughing matter, this world is alot darker than most realize, lol, but hey, someone gotta laugh and smile to keep the positive energy alive right? plus not EVERYONE is like that, just the vast majority, but I have faith in humanity, I think we're SLOWLY waking up.

 

The above are my only my personal opinions and observations

-Astral

 

Again. Very very good post!

 

I'm not sure why you are confused. But I think everything you have said is exceptionally observant and comes quite obviously from real world experience.

 

It may appear that you are agreeing with Non, but in fact your view is very different at root... and the big difference is you say 'not EVERYONE' is like that. Whereas for Non, not everyone is like that but when they are not like that there would still be some reason in his mind that they wouldn't like him.

 

The Non issue as I'm sure you know is ongoing. He relates being confident or sometimes dominant with a person close to him who he doesn't wish to become like. This creates a broken record effect where the needle keeps jumping backwards in a never ending loop. 'A splinter in the mind' that restricts him from becoming the normal expression of a male that he actually is. He cannot get past (someone used this phrase a bit earlier, can't remember who, sorry) a black and white view.

 

The point isn't if he is right or wrong, the point is simply if that view helps him grow and become happy or not. Without getting past the views he cannot see what the fire is that fuels the views that become self defeating.

 

 

I agree with the others, that Non seriously needs to seek professional help. The sad thing is, when the mind is in that state, that is the last thing it will want to do, and it will constantly create many reasons not to, and justify those to itself.

 

Non isn't a bad person, nor a stupid one either. He just needs to realize he doesn't need to become like 'that' person he doesn't want to become like. He does need someone who he can talk to face to face, and like someone else said, a person who won't let him run rings around them.

[Non]

if it really was simply about "being confident" I wouldn't be talking about all this.

 

As much as women that say it's all about confidence, I will still not believe it when they actually just go for the BAD GUY...

 

meanwhile a good guy can say the most innocent genuine thing and he's quickly labelled a perv, a stalker, a freak, sexually harassing, obsessed, scary, rude, not focused, etc. Women can pull the "stalker/perv/rapist/pedo/sick/freak/creep" card all they want...

 

but when it comes down to it, the bad boy THUGS they're with say and do things and call them things that are THOUSANDS of times worse than anything a good guy can say or do.

 

Maybe that's why women have such a hard time finding good men. Because ever since they were young (and STILL ONGOING INTO ADULTHOOD) they would threaten to put men in jail for the simplest most innocent things, yet be manipulative and insult them by accepting abuse from jerks and bad boy thugs.

 

Maybe it's just the USA, but around here it's ALL ABOUT thug culture. If you aren't a thug, or a bad boy, or some type of bad-ass, you are a "scary doormat" to women. You are NOTHING but someone they can manipulate and when we good guys get serious they blame the victim and call us "the REAL jerks, liars etc" the "not really nice-guy" the "socially inept loser-jerk who simply calls himself a nice guy".

 

Because it's all about turning things around and making the victim look crazy and putting the blame all on that same victim.

 

To be real, women don't want good guys. They don't want nice guys. Because they set up the rules of what's "bad". What's bad for a good guy is definitely not bad for a "bad guy/boy". They are excluded, they can do w/e the f*ck they want all of a sudden without any consequences.

 

The good guys want to respect a woman, and avoid sexual confrontation out of courtesy and respect for the woman. They want the woman to give him a signal first or let him know first that it's ok. They dont want to violate, or make the woman feel violated. Because as they were growing up, it was "not ok" to treat her like the sex object she likes to be treated as by the bad boys.

 

Now what can a good guy do? Can he even so much as look at her or any other innocent thing without the girl pulling out the "psycho-stalker" card, the "pervert" card, the "rapist" card", the "freaky creep" card, the "obsessive" card, etc.

 

Well it just so happens that all women carry this "bitch shield" around them to ward off "undesirables" so that men have NO OTHER CHOICE BUT TO BE BOLD and daring, and brave with the girls. This amounts to not putting up with her shit, and actually breaking through those set up boundaries. DUH! no wonder good guys find it hard, they have to VIOLATE YOU just to get to you! and THEN she'll see if you're attractive enough, but at least you've affirmed yourself as 'brave and macho AND BAD' which is the first thing she wants.

 

Since most girls want the men to do everything for her, like decide for her whats best, etc. she'll just tell the good guy "well you never let me know you thought I was sexy enough to violently bang". Hahahaha.

 

How in the hell are we supposed to let you know that, while at the same time "respecting" you like you have "always wanted" us to?

 

But the bad boys do get away with it. Because they can say the most lewd and raunchy things, and OBVIOUSLY girls are going to like it because they have NO CHOICE but to be lustfully seduced by language which invokes imagery of the most raunchiest, sexually uninhibted things that can come to mind, and this cannot be resisted.

 

It's called brainwashing. It's called seduction. yes seduction, the same as deceiving. The same as FORCING, a woman into sexual thoughts,and feelings. Like with kino (touching a woman without permission) and calling it a "game" or making it seem innocent. Or getting so close that it becomes irresistably personal. Deceiving one to be an authority, ie co-ercion.

 

can you believe some women actually LOOK for males who induce fear in them, and then call it love? is it fear or is it love?

 

 

 

You can tell me all you want that there are some girls that are different, they are definitely not the majority. They are perhaps the smallest minority. Finally getting a good boyfriend to step all over and cheat at the age of 40 after banging all the bad boys and being used up, does not count.

 

Ok, maybe on another planet. Maybe...

Edited January 26, 2011 by Non

[sifusufi]

if it really was simply about "being confident" I wouldn't be talking about all this.

 

 

Maybe it's just the USA

 

Edited January 26, 2011 by sifusufi

[Astral_Anima]

yeah women like that jus creep me out, lol. This is kinda the feeling I get when I see people like that...

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IehtHkjx3IY

 

As quoted from the famous Mr Higgins (-- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6sb-vOFqCU --), "let the others of my sex, tie the knots around their necks"

 

Yes, most women and men are devolving at a rapid rate, and It's mostly due to society. remember they don't know any better. They're the equivalent of a crack addict. Their spirit is weak, they're experiencing stockholme syndrome. Alot of shit wrong, but...meh. Fight the ones that cause it, not the victims of it. It isn't their they're fault, they just don't know better...(damned kids ) Jus view them as a lost child...you wouldn't try to date/get with a child would you? I believe someone as observant and educated as yourself wouldn't disgrace yourself with filthy mudbloods and hold a higher standard for themself.

 

-Astral

 

Edit: oh and it's Venus, they "get freaky" well into their 2nd century on Venus XP

Edited January 26, 2011 by Astral_Anima

[phore]

I rely almost exclusively on love at first site to get laid. It seems to happen all the time.

If the initial attraction is there then seduction is a natural process that both partners take part in.

 

There is a flow to the whole thing that you have to follow, but its really not that hard. Like most areas of life it helps to have an open heart (other chakras play a role too)

 

If you have to brainwash women to get laid then your doing it wrong IMO.

[Non]

there is no "love at first sight" its called lust, and wishful thinking. and the ability to make the connection happen, ie rapport, social skills, and luck/chance.

 

Trust me as a guy I know. A smile is not an innocent smile. An innocent look is lust. Its all lust. Is it all bad tho, for you? thats for u to decide.

 

Anyways.. do girls want modesty? No they don't. They might want respect but when they equate modesty with respect, (for one type of guy anyway) it just doesn't work.

Edited January 26, 2011 by Non

[Sloppy Zhang]

Non, I'm not a professional, and I think you should seek a professional, but from what I have seen of your posts....

 

It seems to me like you've gone through, or have been close to (as in someone close to you went through this and/or you saw it as it happened), some type of dramatically negative experience involving some nice guy who's been burned/used by some girl (probably quite beautiful). Maybe there was a bad communication, some wrong signals, maybe it was an unintentional misunderstanding, maybe it was conscious manipulation, but when one party (the nice guy) started to think that the girl liked him, tried to act in a loving way (looking at her, holding hands, something like that), the girl turned on him and was like, "ew, don't touch me you perv! Just 'cuz I'm nice to you doesn't mean I LIKE you, ugh." Even though the "nice guy" had done everything "right" and tried to give the girl what he thought she deserved (as in, everything).

 

This probably reinforced a lot of negative things, such as, "I'm not handsome enough", "I'm not rich enough", "I'm not brutal enough", "I'm not enough of a jerk", especially when the girl in question started going out with (or possibly was going out with all the while) a guy who had most of those characteristics.

 

As per the thoughts found in Gjeken, you've looked around and saw a lot of other "nice guys" go through similar situations with "woman", and as such, the prover came in and cherry picked all the observations that would support that.

 

Maybe I'm projecting. I'm sure lots of guys have been crushed by someone who was (or still is?) the "love of their life", and have gone through a similar pattern of thoughts and feelings. Some move on.... and some don't. But I don't know you. I don't know where you're coming from. I don't know what experiences you've had.

 

Which is why I think you should meet with someone you CAN discuss your experiences with, and where this stuff is coming from, so you can get past it, and get on with more positive aspects of life.

 

[edit] And as for the whole "24 and virgin" thing, I wouldn't really worry about it, there are varying degrees of sexual experience and different ages. A friend was telling me that his brother and that brother's now wife had never even kissed until their wedding day (at the "you can now kiss the bride part"), and they didn't get married until a couple years after they had graduated college (so at, or a little past, the age of 24). Of course, they were pretty conservative Christian, but the point is this:

 

Different people have different standards for what your sexual experience should be at a certain age. For religious (spiritual?) conservative people, that can be NOTHING before marriage.

 

Maybe you need to hang out with a new crowd.

Edited January 26, 2011 by Sloppy Zhang

[phore]

there is no "love at first sight" its called lust, and wishful thinking. and the ability to make the connection happen, ie rapport, social skills, and luck/chance.

 

Trust me as a guy I know. A smile is not an innocent smile. An innocent look is lust. Its all lust. Is it all bad tho, for you? thats for u to decide.

This is just mental dissection of the experience. Love is a phenomenon that holographically spirals through layers of reality, creating everything from chemical spikes in the brain, to spiritual ecstacy, to children. Because love is quantum in nature, you have to believe in the experience of love at first sight to attract it. I suggest practicing certain mantras, to raise your vibrational rate.

 

Breath deep

on exhale say ohm while projecting gratitude to the universe.

 

In conclusion, its all about mojo.

[Cat Pillar]

24 and still a virgin? I'm 26 and my snake's never even seen grass up close!

 

My problem is definitely lack of confidence, but I'm working on that. I still don't think any woman would be crazy enough to fall in love with me, but I'm not so concerned about that these days. If there's a girl out there for me, I'm sure I'll find her. If not, maybe the Universe wants me to be celibate anyways.

 

I spent 11 years with severe depression gnawing away at my soul. But a willingness to face my personal demons and confront the structures that create my perceptual filters has brought me far from the brink of suicide.

 

Also, I sought professional help. Works wonders if you're willing to be honest with yourself and your therapist. The most important thing in the world though - you have to want to change. If you don't want to change, you will find every reason or excuse not to.

 

Your view of reality is your world, and it is altered by your beliefs and your perceptual filters. Change your view, and your world changes too.

[Non]

If you become older you will see how "good" people are just as bad as "bad" people and otherwise. Your mind is tricking you.

 

About finishing last...

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Usain_Bolt

 

He's pretty good and he did not finish last.

 

What you mean is passive guys finish last, impulsive guys finish too early, lol. Passive guys don't die early at all, though. Who told you that?

 

About sex? Here is the biggest nerd, introverted passive nice guys on the planet, virgin till age 21, playing dungeons and dragons all the time:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mystery_%28pickup_artist%29

Erik von Markovich or something. He's now getting more laid then any other person on the planet. He still has butterfly's in his stomach when he meets girls lol, what a nice sweet guy. Pfff... yeah right

 

they die from stress.

 

i dont care about pickup artists either. theyre part of the problem. I got into the material of sosuave.com that suggests being cocky. Ok..that's how women are. they opened me up to the brutality of women.,

 

women are more brutal and competitive than men are, men just have to participate in it to women it's all just a bloodsport for them.

[King Kabalabhati]

24 and still a virgin? I'm 26 and my snake's never even seen grass up close!

 

My problem is definitely lack of confidence, but I'm working on that. I still don't think any woman would be crazy enough to fall in love with me, but I'm not so concerned about that these days. If there's a girl out there for me, I'm sure I'll find her. If not, maybe the Universe wants me to be celibate anyways.

 

I spent 11 years with severe depression gnawing away at my soul. But a willingness to face my personal demons and confront the structures that create my perceptual filters has brought me far from the brink of suicide.

 

Also, I sought professional help. Works wonders if you're willing to be honest with yourself and your therapist. The most important thing in the world though - you have to want to change. If you don't want to change, you will find every reason or excuse not to.

 

Your view of reality is your world, and it is altered by your beliefs and your perceptual filters. Change your view, and your world changes too.

 

 

I love your post Cat Pillar. This is how us "sexually frustrated" men should go about our "problems". Not blame others, assume responsibility and stay positive. There is a special gift in our situation, we have to face a lot of discomfort and loneliness and that is what can, if faced with a cultivation mentality, build more lasting happiness. And once you shine with genuine happiness for no reason they'll be idiots if they don't want a piece of that and we dont care for idiots anyway do we

[King Kabalabhati]

they die from stress.

 

i dont care about pickup artists either. theyre part of the problem. I got into the material of sosuave.com that suggests being cocky. Ok..that's how women are. they opened me up to the brutality of women.,

 

women are more brutal and competitive than men are, men just have to participate in it to women it's all just a bloodsport for them.

 

These sites are not about Taoist love, they are about psychological techniques. Why do you keep on bringing that stuff here? Just because it works for many modern women doesn't make it a Taoist approach. Just because most guys who are into it are cocky jerks doesn't mean there wouldn't be something to learn there. I think you're taking your own person, your own "authenticity" very seriously, and are offended when in reality you could get laid by being "inauthentic". Could there be a middle way?

Edited January 26, 2011 by King Kabalabhati

[King Kabalabhati]

 

that's how women are. they opened me up to the brutality of women.,

 

women are more brutal and competitive than men are, men just have to participate in it to women it's all just a bloodsport for them.

 

Do you know any women? I know very few that fit into your description of them. In fact I know very few who are brutal enough to be honest.

[宁]

Hey Non, cheer up, and listen up a bit:

 

Guys develop adequate masculinity by hanging around girls

Girls develop adequate feminity by hanging around guys

 

Yin nurtures Yang

Yang nurtures Yin

 

Usually weak Yang has it's roots in childhood, the father not being there as a male model, or mother being a castrating type.

 

The situation with most of today's males is that their Yang is weak, and they seek a strong Yin.

Women with weak Yin appear Yang/brutal to men with weak Yang, yet they are still attracted by them, compulsory.

 

At the beginning the relationship may be a bit of a drama, because the male is oversensitive and the female is not so.

 

Then he has two basic options:

Option no 1: If he chickens out and runs away, he will remain a weak Yang.

 

Option no 2: If he gathers his spirit, and takes responsability for the relationship, gradually they will come to a ballance first, and in time his Yang will become strong, and her weak Yin will gradually be replaced by real and sensuous feminity.

 

I see many of these situations in my life everyday, WOMEN as well as MEN do suffer from lack of their dominant quality, Yin, and Yang respectively.

It's a major problem!

 

Unfortunately it's easier for people that don't have this problem to understand the above.