zerostao

What made YOU laugh today/tonight ?

Recommended Posts

Today is 'Easter Monday' .... I wonder what the significance of that 'holy day ' is  ?

 

according to Wiki, it is the 2nd day of ' Eastertide '   ......   ?

 

kinder-surprise-862x1024.jpg

 

 

[  In Egypt, the ancient festival of Sham Ennessim (Arabic: شم النسيم‎, literally meaning "smelling of the breeze") is celebrated on the Coptic (i.e. Eastern) Easter Monday, though the festival dates back to Pharonic times (about 2700 BC). It is an Egyptian national holiday.]

  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4 hours ago, steve said:

 

Reminds me of what a nurse once told me defines the male reaction to life.

She felt we are limited to three possible choices - eat it, kill it, or fuck it....

 

For some, I think they might pick all three options at once.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Nah .... too tricky that , more probably ,  consecutively , in reverse order .

 

 

 

.

Edited by Nungali
  • Haha 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Been there done that, Nungers.

 

It's kind of a black widow thing

 

 

 

Edited by manitou
  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
23 hours ago, Nungali said:

time to devote  a musical interlude   to you then  ...

 

 

 

Thanks, I guess.  I hope you don't mind that I just barely skimmed through it -

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 hours ago, manitou said:

 

 

Thanks, I guess.  I hope you don't mind that I just barely skimmed through it -

 

I do mind   .... I pressed about 50 buttons to do that !   :angry:

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, Nungali said:

 

I do mind   .... I pressed about 50 buttons to do that !   :angry:

 

Sometimes life just confirms literature:

 

ExJ1NDVWYAAfOIY.jpeg.07591586e41a5682903faa93ee31f775.jpeg

  • Like 1
  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dont start that !     Not after today !

 

I just spent two days trying to navigate through some government bureaucratic  web sites, forms and interviews .

 

here are some delightful snippets ;

 

First job , present  an   ORIGINAL  birth certificate  (as required and outlined - copies or certified copies will NOT be accepted ).  That requires me to get one . That requires an application and  some paperwork from me first . Right, lets sit down and work through this  . let's see ....

 

Guess .... go on , all of you , guess what the first document required is to get your  Australian birth  certificate  ?  ... Go on guess

 

....

 

Spoiler

yes, thats right , the first document you need to produce to get an original Australian birth certificate is  ....

 

an original Australian birth certificate

 

... dontchya LUV bureaucracy   :)  )

 

 

Spoiler

 

 

 

But , they are adamant that what you will be supplied with at the end of your approved application is a certified copy of your birth certificate .   The web site application form is INSANE ... or you can go to ( the newly formed - Oh O ! )  ' Service NSW ' . So I did  ( which involved a trip around landslides, detours and eventually out to 'little city'  at the coast ),  but they are " No no no    , we dont do that, you have come to the wrong place, you got confused by the new names, you need to go to  ' ServiceS Australia ' .  - Jeeze , we have a regional centre office at home town for that  ... so I drive back home. next day I go to town .....  " Oh no,  thats 'Service NSW ' you got the new names mixed up . " 

 

  I  got the names mixed up ? 

 

...... and on an on it went  , I  odealed stuff like ;

 

" Why dont you use your own government web site personal page on line at home . "

 

Me ; 'Home is still on 3 G , signal drops in and out, gets cut off for days  .....    ( she goes to interrupt me but I know  what this interruption is going to be , as it has happened OH SO MANY times before  )  .... and when I come into the office or library to use your computer , my page doesnt work properly , I even went into head office to fix it and the guy there impatiently sat down with me to 'show me ' how to work it   but then he stopped and goes " Hey !  whats up with this thing , it isnt supposed to do that !  "

 

Eye - YI - YIIIIIII !   Dude !  thats what I have been saying . So he  'fixes' it but when I get home and try again the problem is still there  ...

 

and then this woman interrupts me and says , "Thats YOUR story  !  I dont want to hear that , it is putting me off what I need to concentrate on to process your enquiries ... if you   keep running that story in your head, you will always fail  at getting through on the site . "

 

:huh:  WTF ! ?   I was answering her question   as to  WHY  I was in  there and not using my internet at home   and accessing 'my personal page ' .....  IT DOESNT WORK

 

anyway, it went on like that in various forms ..... the end result after   3 days actually *  is  .... I am to go home and use my internet and log onto my personal page  *   ( I forgot about the first day  ... I actually went back to 'Service NSW ' the 2nd day, as I had to go in for medical appointment ) all I did was drive by .. and kept going ! Not  only was the line ( just to get a numbered ticket ) out the door , down the disability  ramp , along the car park but also out into the street .  State  Government  has come up with this great plan to put all their services in one place, for ease of access  - great idea ... except   they never made any places to house it !  This one is in the old 'Motor Registry' , that only  looked after   motor vehicle  and boat registrations and licenses,  it still does that, as well as  ;

 

 

  • Fair Trading
  • SafeWork NSW
  • Births, Deaths and Marriages
  • Housing NSW
  • Office of State Revenue
  • Ageing, Disability and Home Care
  • Office of Environment and Heritage
  • Department of Primary Industries
  • Transport for NSW
  • Liquor and Gaming NSW
  • NSW Trustee & Guardian
  • Department of Education
  • NSW National Parks and Wildlife Service
  • NSW Police.

More services are regularly being added to build Service NSW into a complete, one-stop government service delivery model.

 

_ O Goody !  they are going to add more  ...... for our ' one-stop government service delivery model.'

 

 

 

original.jpg

 

 

and in case you are wondering why I posted this in a laugh thread  ... I AM  laughing   ....

 

 

 

 

 

JA3J.gif

 

 

Edited by Nungali
  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Myles Barlow reviews  .......    starting a cult

 

 

 

 

Edited by Nungali

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/4/2021 at 12:47 PM, steve said:

 

Reminds me of what a nurse once told me defines the male reaction to life.

She felt we are limited to three possible choices - eat it, kill it, or fuck it....

 

 

Although I know better, I´m doing that thing where I assume the nurse in question is heterosexual.  I´m assuming she is attracted to men in spite of (or perhaps because of) their alledgedly limited behavioral repetoire.  Which leads me to wonder...a happily married nurse?

 

(PS.  I´m not sure I´d want to be under the care of a nurse who knew you well and continued to hold those beliefs.  She might get my meds mixed up.)

Edited by liminal_luke

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
55 minutes ago, liminal_luke said:

 

Although I know better, I´m doing that thing where I assume the nurse in question is heterosexual.  I´m assuming she is attracted to men in spite of (or perhaps because of) their alledgedly limited behavioral repetoire.  Which leads me to wonder...a happily married nurse?

 

(PS.  I´m not sure I´d want to be under the care of a nurse who knew you well and continued to hold those beliefs.  She might get my meds mixed up.)

🤣

Yes and yes, and raised in a rural farming community and a Daoist. One of the first people to interest me in Daoism...

And one of the best nurses I ever worked with 

😷

 

 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
20 hours ago, liminal_luke said:

 

Although I know better, I´m doing that thing where I assume the nurse in question is heterosexual.  I´m assuming she is attracted to men in spite of (or perhaps because of) their alledgedly limited behavioral repetoire.  Which leads me to wonder...a happily married nurse?

 

(PS.  I´m not sure I´d want to be under the care of a nurse who knew you well and continued to hold those beliefs.  She might get my meds mixed up.)

 

Just a bit of nurse humour .    You better not read up on doctors humour  .....

 

 

Spoiler

we where in labour ward and a woman had just struggled though a difficult birth . Her nervous idiot husband asked the doctor

 

" How long after the birth can we resume normal sexual relations ? "

 

The nurse's where aghast  - dirty looks all round , the doctor, without missing a beat, in the most professional manner  and with a cultured accent  " It is customary to at least wait until the placenta is delivered . "

 

The guy went a bright beetroot colour .

 

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

I got a ' 12v power source ' for lap top  - a type of adaptor -   12v  in and a regulated computer friendly 12v out .... with a selection of changeable plugs  to connect the lead into the computer power source input plug. . The selection had about 15 different plugs on it .

 

Then I got a new lap top and thought to use the same lead . Nope - it doesnt  have that particular plug size on it .  ..... I know ! I got two of those multi-type plug selection kits  in my electric bits box (  left over from other leads I have bought over time  ) ... nope , not one in there either .  I  guess I will have to buy a new plug  .....  nope !   Cant buy a  single plug  . Can I buy the whole   selection in a packet just to get that one plug ?  Nope  ..... gotta buy another whole new 12v power source kit  , just to get a selection of plugs, to find one  25 plug   in it .  I could have gone to 'computer guy's shed'  where he had tons  of leads, plugs,  adaptors and  electrical junk , but he died  (no, a shelf didnt fall on him, he drowned ) .

 

 

 

Edited by Nungali
  • Haha 1
  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, Apech said:

171699697_1801822639968320_4752468382110293115_n.thumb.jpeg.6046bf90dfe239512a0e7eefac09ec65.jpeg

 

 

On an equally depressingly humorous   note

 

Aboriginal 'joke'  ( that is , a joke told BY Aboriginals  )

 

Father  (gesturing out to distant horizon ) ;  " One day son , all of this   ...... will not be yours . "

 

 

 

.....        :( 

 

 

 

  • Like 1
  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

or, I could finish them off right here ;

 

dont swing your cat around by its tail .

dont feed them concrete powder

dont use them for greyhound training

dont make hamburger out of them

 

Spoiler

Hoooo boy !  I am recovering from a massive drug trip last night  ... so excuuuuuuse me .

 

Thing is, they are official meds from the doctor - "Take them first thing in the morning otherwise they keep you up all night ."

 

Keep me up all night , man ! I was speeding off my head  ( and I do NOT like amphetamines )   a friend came around and I couldn't stop talking , I did warn her in advance . The she got tired and decided to go home ; 'What are you going to do ? "

 

" Music maybe , drumming, a bit on the Hung , maybe some late night kata ...." she thought to stay as I was 'being different' and it might be 'fun' but got too tired .  I done a few drugs in my time , so I know 'what's up'  ... this stuff is full on ... and the thing is , I otta take them for 5 days !  so soon I gotta do breakfast and take 3 more  ..... OMG , what a speed freak week this is gonna be 

 

... I better be careful what I do   ....

 

Now, where is that cat ?   Here puss puss , comere puss ....... where did he go ? 

 

Spoiler

 

 

 

hiding-kitty-kitty.jpg

 

 

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites